Maintenance

So, for the last 7 weeks I have been 1 - 4 pounds above my target weight.  Maintenance lasts a LIFETIME.

Note to self:  LEARN to eat properly to maintain, stop binging.

Interesting Lose Weight Article

To lose weight = calories out > calories in, never a pill, machine, or soap?!?!?

Link

Maintenance

The word for the year is maintenance.  148.9 after all the crap I ate over the holidays, I'll take it!  Apparently, I've learned better habits about portions then I thought!  :)

While I found losing weight to be a constant struggle with wanting to eat what I "used" to eat and eating what I KNOW will make me lose weight, I now find myself with the same struggle.

Lesson learned:  I can NOT eat what I "used" to eat, ever again.  Not in the quantity I "used" to eat the junk.  Maintenance will be a constant struggle with wanting to eat what I ate when I was fat and eating what I KNOW will control my weight.

If you are on a journey to lose weight know this:  you can NEVER eat what you "used" to eat in the QUANTITIES you used to eat and expect to lose or maintain.  It simply is mathematically impossible.  It really is as simple as calories in vs calories out.  When you endeavor to lose weight, and maintain, as I am currently doing, you begin to realize this is a lifestyle change and NOT a diet.  Diets are temporary, lifestyle changes can be permanent.

Here's to the New Year and figuring out how to cook low calorie meals with the correct proportions of carbs (60), protein (20) and fat (20) which seems to work best with my cravings and my body.  Out with frozen meals such as lean cuisine, smart one's, and healthy choices and IN with healthy meals I actually prepare myself.  Of course, I still have two slices of pizza a week.  Currently, I eat Domino's, they really have changed for the better, and I can't find a better "local" place where I currently live.

Hope everyone has a great year!

155.6

EIGHT pounds.  Count'em.  EIGHT pounds since Friday from eating JUNK!  Damage control INCOMING!  All week, back to good eating.  Weigh-in on Friday.  Grrrrrrrr

Friday

Lunch - Chipotle
Dinner - Pizza
Snack - Three peanut butter squares

Saturday

Lunch - Arby's
Dinner - Leftover Pizza

Sunday

Lunch - Perkins
Dinnner - Leftover Chipotle
Snack - M&M McFlurry

Yup, I earned it, and it just goes to show how OFF you can get so QUICKLY.

Happy Monday!

Happy Friday

Me - Quitting, Again

First day of quitting smoking.  Again.  For the final time. (ARRRRRGHHHHH)  Just got done visiting my dad.  He basically said good bye to me, because he doesn't think he'll be there next time I go home. 

Words can not describe how sad I am.  I told him that was completely up to him, that I understood if he was sick and tired of being sick and tired.

We made a trip to the hospital because he thought that there was another problem that they could fix.  He had a dull pain in his left lung, we thought it may be pneumonia again. The doctor told him there was nothing he could do for him, that it was not pneumonia, just the progression of the disease and asked how he could make him comfortable.  The thing is, he's not in pain per se, as much as he simply can't breathe.

Cigarettes, fumes, anything that will effect your lungs, stay away from them, and protect yourself around fumes.  My dad installed carpet for 20 years as well.  The fumes of glue, carpet fibers, etc contributed to my dad's illness.  Along with smoking two packs a day for 40 years.

Hopefully it's not too late for me.  The problem is staying quit.  Nicotine addiction is a lifelong thing, or so it seems from my experience and speaking with other former addicts.  Even my dad still wants to smoke.  It's ridiculous and I hate it.

I had entirely too much food over Thanksgiving weekend, and the scales this morning were 152.6.  Not going to log until Friday though.

Hope you all had a great Thanksgiving holiday.  Be well.  Make good choices.  I'm trying.

Hoping vs. Doing

My yoga studio opened in it's NEW location last night, 15 minutes closer to my house! So, now I do not have an excuse NOT to go!  I have never felt SO weak in my life.  Wow, I have lost alot of muscle mass.

Schedule is: 

Mon/Wed - 630 pm - 800 pm
Sat/Sun - 1100 am - 1215 pm

The owner of the studio commented on how much weight I had lost since she'd seen me last (tells you how long it's been since i last went to yoga!).  I heard myself tell her, "yup, and I hope to lose 10 more" ......  :|

Wait... wait... wait... I HOPE to lose 10 more??!?!?  There is NO hope, there is only I WILL lose 10 more.  Wow.  I couldn't believe I heard those words come out of my mouth.

During your weight loss journey, remove words that are PASSIVE such as hope, wish, etc from your vocabulary and replace them with words that define ACTION:  will, am losing, etc.

Wow.  Self, get back on track.

Happy Thursday, ladies!

not bad

GAIN - 4 pounds!

Well, almost.  The kicker?  Just over the weekend!  So, what gave me almost FOUR pounds in 3 days?

Friday -

After work Snack:
LARGE (did i really need large, wouldn't small have sufficed?), Hot Fudge Sundae (100 degree weather, I DESERVED it, right!?!?)

Dinner:
Leftover Chipotle (this is normal though, it was the snack that was abnormal)

Saturday -

Dinner:
Two pieces of pizza and two hot wings (again, somewhat normal to have this once a week)

Sunday -

Lunch:  Two pieces of pizza and two hot wings(not so normal, generally if we do pizza, we do it on Sunday, which means I eat it once)

So!  All of this conspired to make the scales almost FOUR POUNDS heavier today.  Official weigh-in isn't till Friday though, so.....  we shall see what normal eating the rest of the week produces.

Chosen.  Choices.  Choose.  Wisely.

meh

OMG!  on a side note.  I heard on the radio this morning that some company is going to start making PLUS sizes for CHILDREN as young as THREE!!!!  Seriously?  WTF?  Is the US THAT screwed up that our three year olds are over weight?!?!? 

We seriously need to teach America how to eat.  I know this is one of the many reasons I never had kids.  If I can't even feed myself in a proper manner, how in the world would I ever expect to be able to feed a child in a proper manner?  More importantly, TEACH a child how to eat properly?

We have a HUGE problem in the US and other parts of the world I'm sure, and I honestly don't know how to go about fixing it.  How do we fix it?  We of all people are aware of the problem, what can we do to help solve it?

grrrrr

Happy Monday, ladies.

Addictions - Letting go

I am an addict.  I possess the uncanny ability to "get addicted" to just about anything.  I have in the past been addicted to many different things (not in order):

1.  Exercise
2.  Weighing myself (up to 6 times a day)
3.  Cigarettes
4.  Drugs
5.  Food

Currently, I am addicted to playing a video game and I want to stop, but I can't seem to do it.  Much like drugs or alcohol, playing my video game started out as a social outlet, but now it is pure habit. 

The nature of the addiction is such that you can't ween yourself off, per se, as for me, it's an "all or nothing" type of addiction.  I either need to play the game, play it well, to the best of my ability, or not at all.  "Going casual" isn't really an option for me or my ego concerning the game.  Although, I just made a switch towards "more casual."

Perhaps it's an issue not so much with addiction as it is with "letting go".  I have a hard time with endings, as well.  I don't do endings very well or gracefully.  My endings generally involve drama whether self-inflicted or otherwise.

I think the real problem is without my addictions, my life is rather empty.  In my series of choices, I chose not to have kids.  I was afraid of changing my life as I knew it, forever.  Selfish, perhaps.  They say those of us without kids, who choose to not have kids, are selfish, self-centered, yada yada.

Since I chose this life for myself, I guess all I have are my addictions to make me feel less empty, so now I need to choose another, healthy, addiction.  Should probably get back to being addicted to exercise, at least that was good for me and only mildly annoying to others in the form of me getting cranky when I didn't exercise.

Ramblings for Friday.  How does one let go?  Have a great weekend, ladies!