Building Self-confidence

I am here to become beautiful and self-confident!

My Profile

  • Name: xyl
  • City: Toronto
  • Region: Ontario
  • Country: Canada

My Support Groups

My Weight Loss

Height: 160.0cm
Start weight: 55.00kg
Current weight: 51.80kg
Goal weight: 47.00kg
Lost to date: 3.20kg
Remaining: 4.80kg

My Calendar

May '15
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My Photos

Before After

First success

After I've realized that I'm failing to loose weight I gave up. Yes! I stopped writing blog posts, count calories, go to the gym. I ate what I want, no sports, lots of sweets.

But suddenly I felt sick. So I went to the doctor and she gave me all sirts of drugs. But what is more important - she gave me a diet! I had to stop eating sweets at all. Just meat and vegetables. And of course drugs.

At the same time I started walking instead of driving car. Just for fun.

In about a week I realized that I feel VERY good. It was tough not to eat candy bars or dring soda. But I made it and quit eating wring staff.

Then I return back to Yoga! Because I felt that  I really wanted it.

So, I've realized that HABIT is what made me gain a success. Well, may be 4 kilos is not that much, but still I am proud that I've managed to do it.

Hope, I'll have enough strength to continue loosing weight tomorrow =)

I wish you to succeed! -) It is very difficult to continue, but as soon as it starts to be a habit - it can be very enjoyable

Effective motivation

Thinking about routine workouts and diet restrictions it's difficult to build proper motivation. Why I MUST do it? What are my reasons? What it is for me?

First of all... I like to feel that I'm beautiful. This feeling gives me self-confidence and self-motivation.

Second, yes! Guys! I love the feeling when guy is looking at me and I get I positive signal from him. Of course compliments. Even without words. Eyes can't hide interest and affection.

Third, health! I feel much better, more active. I sleep better and even wake up better.

So, this three things will help me keep working

Back in the past

As long as I have got time I can think about when I've had the weight of my dream.

1999 - 49 kg (108 lbs)
2000 - 59 kg (130 lbs)
2001 - 47 kg (103 lbs)
2003 - 45 kg (99 lbs)
2005 - 53 kg (116 lbs)
2010 - 51 kg (112 lbs)
2011 - 55 kg (121 lbs)

Now I will analyse what I was doing at that time.

1999 - 49 kg (ballroom dancing, walking a lot with friends, school exams)
2000 - 59 kg (sitting a lot, no walking, a little dancing, eating a lot junk food)
2001 - 47 kg (enrolment in the university, university sports team of badminton, walking all nights with boyfriend, almost not eating because of the lack of time)
2003 - 45 kg (tough break up with boyfriend, switched badminton to aikido)
2011 - 55 kg (no sports, no walking, only health diet)

Sooo! A lot of sports and walking make us beautiful. So my plan will be to choose sport I like and do it as fast as possible. Plus after it gets warmer I will walk to my work office, not drive!


It is outstanding how much difficulties women have got because of their sex. Female body do all sorts of strange and uncomfortable things: gains fat fast, gathers too much water, hardly built mussels and etc. Today I want to talk about period (or menstruation). I checked my weight and WOW. It is 55! More then when I've started my weight-loss activities. I haven't eaten any candy bars for almost a week. I even had no dinner on Thursday and on Friday. And such result could make me cry if it were not because of period. Plus I'm feeling sick very much so I am not able to do Yoga or even go to work. Yesterday I was laying down watching TV all day long gathering calories. Well, I sometimes need to give myself more time

Plus: time to think and to analyse
Minus: break that makes it difficult to get back to workout

Every day

Every day I need to keep doing things for my body.

1. First of all I've started having breakfast. Don't know how it helps but I'll determine it scientifically - by experiment.

2. I've eaten only meet and salad for lunch.

3. Instead of half of nuts I eat banana. But I'm not sure about banana because probably it has a bunch of calories in it. Needs to be checked.

4. I am planning to have 1,5 hour of Yoga and only meet and vegetable dinner.

5. My weight is pretty much the same but I have a positive feeling that my stomach shrinks. It even feels good!


I love yoga. It is so comfortable for me. Not fast, no sweat, just pleasant meditative music and relaxation. Yesterday I found yoga music in the Internet, turned the lights off, lighted up a candle and did yoga for an hour and a half. Stretching is cool way for loosing weight. Last time I've lost 5 kilos doing yoga! Pretty good result especially it I tell that it took me only 90 days do reach it. Well, today I am going to repeat and loose some calories before I go to bed. As for my weight it is 54,3. Well, let's continue loosing weight!!! 

Additional restrictions

Thinking about reasons of getting extra calories I came to conclusion that I eat too much candy bars when I work. I usually rather nervous at work that's why I eat something to make myself more comfortable. That' why I bought nuts. Plain nuts and took them with me. So on Monday and on Tuesday I haven't eaten any candy bar or candy at all. Just tea with no sugar and nuts. 

Additionally buying groceries on Monday among sweet things were only yogurts and fruits. So, the point is the lesser sugar the better.

As for my weight. On Monday it was 53.7 but today It returns to 54,6. Probably I've drunk too much tee today ;)


Even though separated steps are very important I like to see the whole picture. In other words I need to define a strategy. Where to move, what to do, what goal do I have to accomplish to feel comfortable about my body. 

As I can see, extra weight is a complex problem for a lot of people and it is not a secret that only everyday hard work would lead one to a success. Thus, I need to work at least in three ways:

1. Food. I need to determine what food I am going to eat. Of course healthy food. Low fat, low sugar, high cellulose. Plus I promise from this moment and on to eat only half of every meal I eat. And drink at least 8 glasses of water every day. Simple things. I know. I'll try to figure out how to choose a diet. 

2. Fitness. I like yoga, I promise to do yoga every day. Other then that I'll choose the fitness club to go to. And will figure out how to move more than I do now. Maybe by walking to the office where I work or join some athletic team. 

3. Motivation. I am a very lazy person. I like to do nothing, lay on the couch reading books or surf the Internet. How to motivate myself? Well, I think each of us have to do it it's own way. a) I promise to find a picture of a girl that looks like me but with an outstanding body and put it on the wall in the kitchen. b) I bought a t-short that 2 sizes smaller then I am. Very expensive. I've never worn it. Why? My belly make me cry when I see it in this t-short. So! I promise by the end of the period I stated in this blog put it on and take pictures of myself. Scary  :) 3) Every day I promise to do my best to move a lot, eat right food, think positively about my body!

Very next step

Right after I've written the first post to my diet blog I went to the  store to bye a very nice scale. I am going to monitor my weight every day and post data to the log. 

I was pretty much surprised to get 54.6 kg as a result of scaling. My clothes and my belly are telling me that I weight more then 57 kg. Well, I know that it does not matter how much you weight in case you look good. But my extra fat bothers me a lot, so scale would play the role of additional encouraegment :)

Let's begin


First of all I want to introduce myself. My name is Xylia, but you can call me Xyl. For a long time I am disappointing myself with a weight problem. And today I realized that I am thinking about how bad I look for ALL THE TIME. Of course I tried all sorts of diets and fitness meals, dancing classes and morning exercises. No result. Even if I loose some waight this week next week I definitely ruin my success. And this how my life had been for more than 10 years. Today I realized that I want to do something with this situatuion and as soon as possible. So, I've found this site and signed up! This is my first step to selfconfidence. Because I can't feel good if I look bad!