02/22/2010 23:45
Two "off" weekends
Well, I have just put my best friend on a plane and sent her back to Wisconsin, which I'm very sad about but we did have a great time! She was here for the weekend, and her trip followed a weekend in Rhode Island with a different friend of mine. As you can imagine, both weekends posed some serious challenges and made me think a lot about food choices, "dieting" on "vacation", and just how much to hold on versus letting go.
Thank goodness Melanie was totally up for balancing our inevitably amazing meals (Junior's cheesecake, turkish grill, bobby flay's Bar Americain, Taim falafel) with physical activity. We went to the gym on Saturday morning (who else would go to the gym with me on vacation?!?!) and had a great workout, then spent Sunday walking all over Manhattan. We walked on the new Highline park for a little while, then through Chelsea, and ended the night near Herald Square doing some shopping. But there were definitely lapses and indulgences that I'm going to be working off all week. After dropping Melanie off at the airport, I went immediately to the gym for a long workout.
I love food, and I love exploring different cultures through cuisine. There's almost nothing I love more than seeing the pure joy that amazing food can create on a loved one's face. I don't want food to become my enemy... I don't want food to be the devil or to feel like there are foods that I CAN'T have. I'm trying to negotiate a long-term relationship with food wherein I am honest with myself about the cost of overeating or indulging in something that is more costly than something else. Because, when faced with gourmet chocolate, I think I should be able to buy 2 pieces and enjoy them for the glorious food that they are.
Over the weekend, I was fairly good at portion control (Bar Americain being the exception, but even at Junior's I didn't finish my cheesecake and brought half home for another day), but I wasn't good at, 1) selected splurging - if I wanted it, I bought it even if I had just had something high in calories or on my "occasionally only" list, and that's not where I want to be, or 2) paying the price for my indulgences, i.e., if I want those pieces of chocolate I'd better be willing to hit the gym or do the Wii Fit for 30 minutes that night. One thing that I was please about was that Melanie and I had several light, fresh, low calorie meals at home, including 2 out of 3 breakfasts (hard boiled eggs and fruit) and 2 out of 3 lunches (whole wheat pasta with low calorie turkey bolognese, then homemade butternut squash and sweet potato soup and a green salad with turkey and honey mustard vinaigrette).
I'm still trying to learn how to change my relationship with food, and to learn that "no" is a functional word in my food vocabulary, but I'm also at the stage where I'm pleased that I can have slip ups and then get right back on track like going to the gym today. I believe that, just like changing a dysfunctional relationship, I can continue my love affair with food while changing the way I interact with it and the types of food that make my mouth water. Am I crazy?