Finally, I feel like I am back on track (despite the fact that I ate Chinese food for lunch, yipes!).
I kind of felt like the day was shot to heck since I ate that Chinese food for lunch, but I sucked it up and went to the gym tonight. I did my 40 minute run/walk routine and then a quick lower body resistance circuit. Felt great afterwards!
And even better, I bought my new running shoes tonight! I was supposed to get them as a reward for myself after my first month on JC, but I never got around to it. I am happy that I bought them. It feels good to reward yourself. I guess I was minimizing my success and didn't think I deserved the shoes because I didn't lose as much as I wanted in that first month. But you know what? I was wrong! I did a lot of different things that made me deserve to get the shoes:
I've been drinking at least 8-10 glasses of H2O daily
I've limited my binges...turned them into overeats instead of all out food fests
I've lost 8 lbs!
Thanks to everyone for your words of encouragement. I really was down on myself and felt like giving in to the food, but you guys really helped pull me out of it. Thanks! I owe ya one!
Ok so I gained 0.4 lbs last week. I know that's miniscule and won't hurt me in the long run, but gosh darn! I wanted a loss!
I have to accept responsibilities for my actions though. I didn't eat too well last week. I was also working out more, but maybe too much. I started a new running program that recommends 40 minute workouts 5 days a week, but I was doing an hour at least 6 days. I'll cut back a little bit.
I love what Jenny Craig does for my figure but not for my checkbook. Sooo, what do I do? Do I forgo Jenny for a couple of months until I start my nursing job? Or do I continue to pinch pennies and stress myself out about not having the money I need for other things (ie. credit card bills)?
I guess the smartest thing to do would be to wait until I have the money coming in at a steadier rate. I don't want to have to put my JC food on my credit card. I'd rather pay cash. So I guess I am going to just have to play it really carefully for the next 8-10 weeks. I will try to stick with the same basic foods that are on JC, watch my sodium, drink my water, exercise, and limit my portion sizes. I don't think the losses will be as big as with JC, but something is better than nothing right?
I'll keep everybody posted on my progress. I posted new pictures too! Check them out. Some are from now and some are from my lowest weight in highschool. I lost about 30-40 lbs to get to that weight in highschool (145lbs).
I am writing this post to confess that I just ate a giant chocolate chip cookie with a nice cold glass of milk...IT SURE WAS YUMMY. But now the guilt is setting in... This week has been a true test of my willpower and committment to losing this weight. I am going through an ugly breakup that has been going on for the past 2 years...crazy, right? It's a looooong story. Anyways, once again I decided to trust him, and once again I'm standing here trying to pick up the zillion pieces of my heart off the ground. I have wanted to eat crappy food sooooo bad all week. Today was the first day that I actually gave in to my emotional eating. I have done really well otherwise. I've been to the gym everyday (I started a running program!). I know that I shouldn't beat myself up for this little indiscretion, but it's so hard not to. I feel like I have just sabotaged all of my hard work. Do you ever feel like that? I know it's common and it's not the first (or last) time that I will feel this way along my weight loss journey. I guess the trick is just getting back up on the horse, bruised tailbone and all .
I weigh in at JC tomorrow. Wish me luck! I think I'll show a loss despite the damn cookie
Well I'll be! I LOST 3.2 pounds this week! I can't believe it. I was so worried about gaining since I didn't eat so well over the weekend, but I guess I didn't do as bad as I thought. I LOVE Jenny Craig! I've tried many other eating plans but this is by far my favorite. That may have a little something to do with me actually giving myself the time to lose and not getting so frustrated so quickly. I find the program easy to follow. I am rarely hungry. In fact, when I do eat extra foods not on the program it isn't because of physical hunger, but more emotional hunger.
This is so funny to me. I am usually such a perfectionist and very critical of myself. The first week I relax and take things as they come, I have a good loss! This definitely tells me that I should take it easy and not be so high strung and worry about things like I do.
I like this new relaxed feeling, although it is a little strange to let go of the reins and yield to the powers that be. I guess I'm not giving up control completely, I'm just accepting the fact that I can't control everything. My new favorite quote is:
"I don't have to be perfect. I just have to be perfectly me!"
Week 6 on Jenny Craig starts tomorrow. So far I have only lost 5.2 lbs. I'm hoping my last couple of days will not show up on the scale. I haven't been sticking to the plan as well as I should. I keep letting other things get in the way--parties, dinners out, emotions, and my screwed up sleep habits.
I really want to do this for myself. In the past, I've wanted to lose weight for the wrong reasons (ie. a boy) and it's only made things worse. I know that if I do this for me I'm much more likely to keep the weight off and actually be successful. I start my first nursing job in August. I really want to be able to walk onto the unit feeling confident and in control. I in no way expect to be 100 lbs lighter by August, but I figure I can get a good chunk (no pun intended) of it out of the way by then.
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