I want to say thanks to all of you who stop by my blog - all the support, and the encouragement you give me - the inspiration you all provide me, and your new friendships :) Sorry I've been away a few days.
It was all in all a pretty good week. Another 1.6 pounds, but a little annoyed with that because of course 2 days before official WI, I was down to 225....ARGGH! Stupid stupid water weight - but it's ok. I know the pattern, I just don't know what is causing it, or how to fix it. And after an almost 8 pound loss the week before, I certainly can't complain!
People are starting to notice something's different. It's exciting and a little scary too :) As more people know what I'm doing, it feels like there's a little more added pressure to keep with it - which is great, but in the past that would hang me up for sure! I'm still staying with that "inner" motivation, and the faith that what I've asked for (being at goal weight) has already been "granted". It's just a waiting game now, until I get there :) I'm doing what I need to do, so there's no other choice for me to reach that goal eventually! Of course, we'd all like it to be overnight, with no struggles! But what I've learned from a past of struggling, is that THAT's how we learn. I think all those struggles in the past have finally sunk in - the lessons I've learned from them that is. So this time, it's sticking - it's working - and I'm so thankful! I need to remember that myself sometimes, even though I talk about it so much - I need to practice what I preach too!!!!
Got 4 new workout DVD's - 1 pilates, and 3 bellydance! I got the Goddess Cardio workout - it's ok. :) Not super impressed. But the more I get into bellydance, sadly, the less impressed I am with Dolphina. She's great for beginners - but as you progress you start to notice that she seems a bit more like a cheerleader trying a little too hard to be a bellydancer lol. The next dvd I got is KILLER - it's called "Tribal Fusion Belly Dance". Whoa. This is a TOUGH one. It combines some yoga, some serious isolations, and drills, and led by the phenomenal "bellydance superstar" Rachel Brice. If you ever get a chance, go find her on u-tube.... holy toledo, the woman can move parts of her body that I never even knew could BE moved LOL. The 3rd bellydance dvd I got is also by one of the "bellydance superstars", Jillina - called "Instructional Bellydance with Jillina - level 1" and it's great because it teaches you step by step a routine... while also showing you how to do the moves and really breaks them down for you. It's also very very tough - at least for me. :) Sunday I worked for almost 2 hours with "Jillina"... tonight I worked with "Rachel" - my new favorite dvd coaches lol. And wow, can I feel it. When I got done with the Jillina session, I was soaked; like I'd just come out of the shower. It doesn't look like you're doing much, but doing those isolations - pulling and holding, pushing out - the hip work - the upper body work - you WILL feel this, and you will be exhausted, but you'll also feel so good, and the more I do this, I know that my technique will really take on new directions. By the time I get into a class again I'll be ready! GREAT stuff. So I have been living and breathing bellydance, and the pilates really works in harmony with it, because it's strengthening your core - and bellydance is all about your core! I can feel the inches just melting off me! I'm pretty sure after about 6 months of working with these dvd's, that I will be able to roll a coin up and down my stomach lol. Ok. Maybe not. But maybe in 6 months, the coin will at least not get lost! LMAO!
Have a GREAT GREAT week!!!! I'll catch up again soon!
Here are some amazing things to ponder, from a book called "The Secret", a book that was written about the "Law of Attraction". If you haven't read it - do yourself a favor, and pick it up!
In a nutshell: (quoting from the book)
The Law of Attraction says like attract like, so when you think a thought, you are also attracting like thoughts to you.
Thoughts are magnetic, and thoughts have a frequency. As you think thoughts, they are sent out into the Universe, and they magnetically attract all like things that are on the same frequency. Everything sent out returns to the source - you.
You are like a human transmission tower, transmitting a frequency with your thoughts. If you want to change anything in your life, change the frequency by changing your thoughts!
Your current thoughts are creating your future life. What you think about the most, or focus on the most, will appear in your life.
Your thoughts - become things.
(From "The Secret", Secret Summaries, chapter 1)
Ponder this a bit. Can you even fathom it? I know - it sounds new age - new thought - and I guess it is. But this is as old as time - the Bible talks about it - the greatest minds in history knew this principle, and used it, to become succesful. It goes far beyond just positive thinking though - and that's part of the real "trick". You have to FEEL it. It's the feelings that we send out... that create the magnet, that bring those things that make us feel good, back to us. How does this relate to losing weight? Well,..... think about it!
If we're walking around, sulking, thinking, I can never do this. That goes out on that "negative I can't do this" frequency... like a radio wave.... and everyone thinking that same thing... all those negative thoughts all join together... and it comes back to you magnified! Ever notice, when you are having a bad day? How did it start? It probably started with something so tiny, and so silly - something like stubing your two....you get upset, because it hurts. You jump around, maybe kick something out of the way that caused it... you maybe swear, or at least grumble at it.... next thing you know, you're looking at the clock, and you're running late! More stress! So you rush to get put together... you fly out of the house.... you realize half way to work, that you've left your purse at the house. More stress!!! And if you go back now, you're probably going to be late. And then, do you you notice, that everyone is driving 20 miles under the speed limit, no matter what lane you escape into? You get home, grab your purse, get in your car, in the process of rushing and being angry, you spill your latte that you just paid 4.00 bucks for........ now it's all over your just cleaned upholstery in the car. No napkins. Dammit. You look at the clock - no time - have to get to work. You hit every red light there is.... you know you're boss is going to be angry, because there's no way now that you're getting to work on time and you're self talk is going something like this - "geez, I'm an idiot - how could I be so stupid? What is the matter with me? I'm pathetic! I'm never on time! How can this keep happening to me?" Pretty soon you're an inch away from road rage, because once again, you're stuck in traffic with "stupid people". About this time you're thinking, this is just GREAT. This SUCKS! This is going to be a horrible day!
And guess what. You just asked for it - you sent out the signal with all that has happened up to this point - and here's the kicker - the Universe says, ok, "your wish is my command"!
Then there's that friend of yours, you know the one, she's happy all the time. Ridiculously happy. How can she be happy all the time? We're stuck in traffic, and she doesn't even care! Look at that! She hits every green light! Why doesn't that happen to me???? As you pull into the store, there always just happens to be a spot up front - right in front for her. Always. What's the deal???
It's because she's sending out good vibes. She just assumes that there will be a parking spot, (and many times, she's not even aware that she's assuming this) she's not stressed about it, and so the universe says, "your wish is my command" and boom - someone pulls out just as you pull in.
Have you ever noticed, the more you worry about not having enough money - the less you seem to have? Then there are the times, where you know the money is tight - but you say, ok, I know we'll get through this somehow - and somehow - you do. You don't know how or why, but somehow, it all works out.
It goes far beyond just thinking positive though. But thinking positive is definitely the start - you have to start thinking the good thoughts so you can start feeling the good thoughts.
You ask for what you want. And the Universe, doesn't distinguish - doesn't recognize negative or positive. Words like "don't, can't, - negations - don't compute. It recognizes fact. So if you say, "I don't want to be late today!" What goes out is.... "I want to be late... and I want to be late more often!"............ if we say, " I don't want you to treat me that way" - what goes out is, "I want you to treat me that way, and I want others to treat me that way too!" If you say, "I don't want to end up binging today!" What your brain hears is, "I want to binge today - and I want to binge again and again!"
So instead of saying "I don't want.... I can't.... I hate.... " replace the words - rephrase it. Instead of "I don't want to binge today".... instead, "I choose to eat right today". Instead of "I know that eating this cake is going to ruin my diet" " say, .. "cake is great - and I can have cake anytime I choose. Right now, I choose to have _____ ." You have to use your own wording, and it's easier to understand if you read the book, or watch the DVD, to really "get" the concept. It was a huge "Aha"! moment for me, reading that book. And I believe it's a big reason that this time, the weight is coming off so consistently. And I saw what happened big time, when I feel into the negativity pity self loathing trap - it wasn't good!
The important thing is:
Ask for what you want
Believe that it is done - that you already have it
Give thanks for it - have an attitude of grattitude!
Don't worry about how or when it will arrive - let the powers that be worry about that - but know that you ARE recieving it right now - it's on it's way!
Most importantly, make space for it to arrive. Believe it - Feel it - and the more passionately you believe and feel that you've recieved - the sooner it will come into your life.
Keeping a grattitude journal can really help you get into the spirit of receiving. It's like what it says in the Bible - "Ask, and you shall recieve". But you can't just ask - you really have to believe that it's been answered, and that it's on it's way. Every night before you go to bed.... try writing down just 5 things that you are grateful for. Try this for a week. Every night, try to add another thing to your list. It doesn't matter how small or insignificant it might seem to you - if it's something to be thankful for - write it down! On days you feel bad - go back to your gratitude journal, and look at all the wonderful gifts and blessings you have in your life!!!
This whole concept, is nothing new. Again, much of this comes straight out of the Bible - when Jesus would heal someone - and says, you are healed - and the man walks - it's because the man had total faith that he was healed - and so he is.
I know this might sound like crazy ranting. But our minds are so powerful - we don't even use the majority of our brains! So who knows what powers we truly have within us, to heal, to achieve our dreams - to lose this weight!
Of course we have to help things along the way, as with our weight loss. We have to make good choices. But if your head is in the place of abundance of weight loss - it becomes so much easier to make those choices! You feel so good, that you actually want to eat better. You want to excersize! It's a mind shift - and it comes from love, and from faith. And from not worrying about the "how".... just focus on the "now" and do what you're supposed to do - the rest will take care of itself on it's own!!!!
"Our job, is not to figure out the "how" The "how" will show up out of a commitment and belief in the what" - Jack Canfield
"If you turn it over to the Universe (or God, as I like to say), you will be surprised and dazzled by what is delivered to you. This is where magic and miracles happen" - Dr. Joe Vitale
And so tonight, I challenge you - to change the way you think. Catch yourself when you start to beat yourself up over a choice you didn't plan on. Instead, focus on the good things - like moving forward, forgiving yourself, and getting back on track right away. You have the power!!!! We all do - we just might not really know it yet! Many of us know it - and don't really believe it. And some... know and believe - but aren't thankful. You get the picture. :) Every single thing that happens - believe it or not - is something we've chosen in some way, by putting ourselves on a negative wave length - or a positive one. That's a hard one to swallow - it puts the responsibility on us - not on someone else, or something else. No.. we choose. We were given freedom of choice. We choose to fail - or we can choose to suceed! Yes, stuff happens - but in the end, we STILL are the ones that choose, how to respond.
Every day - every moment is a gift. We can choose to waste it, or dwell on negative things - or we can use it for good. Every one of us - together - can change the world. One thought at a time! Can you imagine? So think happy thoughts. Believe that this weight is coming off. Believe that you are abundantly blessed - because you are! Stop hiding your God given talents and your beautiful light - no more excuses. Shine!!!!!
"The only thing holding us back - is ourselves"
"What we resist - persists"!!!! (so flow with it baby!)
And we've all heard, "you are what you eat", right? ....well here's a new one:
"We become what we think about."
And right about now, I'm thinking about a size 7!!!!!!! lol!!!!!
Trying week - and musing about how muscle works...
Boy, this has been a trying week emotionally for me. My dad's birthday - he passed 2 years ago, feels like 3 weeks ago for some reason. More changes at home with some life altering moments - so it's been very confusing, upsetting, and a little terrifying.
But this weight loss thing has done more than just help me lose weight. I seem to be dealing with life's curves with a clearer less emotional head - before I would have had a major melt down. Yesterday I did have a weird thing happen where my body went into one of one of those "hot flashes" as I've called them - but this lasted over 4 hours - I couldn't get dry, I was soaked from head to foot, and worse, it was a cold sweat, and I couldn't get warm. I finally had to leave work, go home, take a hot shower, dry clothes, and 3 blankets to get warm before it gave up. So maybe it was my body that had the melt down instead of my emotions.
Last two days food wise, have not been the best. Again, going back to the "not getting the food in" thing. At least I got lunch breakfast and dinner in, made myself eat an apple - but the other "snacks" and the "vitamin" bar went by the wayside - oddly enough, this morning I'm at 225.8.......... OMG 225! I'm at 225!!!! Ok. Calm - that very well may not last, because I haven't been "healthy" about it. Skipping your foods, isn't a good idea. Personally, I think Jenny gives us far too many chocolatey snacks - not that it isn't wonderful, and yes, you still lose weight. But to me it just feels like, well, what's going to happen when I stop losing - am I going to start eating snickers bars and think it's ok, because it's a "snack" for the day?? lol.
Ok, of course not. But you are repeating a habit you're learning! So reading the labels is a good thing. Funny thing, those chocolately snacks, really aren't that much better than a real chocolate bar! It's that they're smaller - think Halloween sized candy bar. Great news for chocoholics, but I'm a breadaholic. Something I haven't gotten much of in that form on here at all :)
Not being negative. Just reflecting. I'm blown away that I'm sitting here at 225. That's insane!!! One pound away from 20 pounds gone - and the clothes are really starting to show it - more that the inches are so high that I've lost. I just really need to slay the emotional eating dragon. This time it doesn't want to eat - before I used to binge. So finding balance.... finding the middle. That's key for me. And stop beating ourselves up if something doesn't go right. This week was a big lesson for me. No matter what happens yesterday, you can't change it today. It's done. It's history. The only thing you can do, is make adjustments TODAY, to BALANCE things out.
I haven't excersized once this week - so not doing well on my excersize part of the challenge. But for me, I think I'm needing to go a little further with just diet, before really hitting excersize hard. I say that, because the week I did hit excersize hard, I gained 2 pounds. This week no excersize, and I've already lost almost 4 pounds??? What gives with that????
Tempting to keep on that pattern. But. What did I say? Oh yeah. Balance. BALANCE!!! So I think I'll go play on the balance ball lol. If anyone has any theories about the weird excersize gain/ no excersize and loss thing, I'd love to hear it. I'm thinking it could be muslce - but that fast? No - I think it's water weight. When we build muscle, we are actually tearing muscle down and apart first - then it "heals", and that's where you get more muscle. I'm guessing with that, because you've "injured" yourself to do this, that you're body might want to retain water to assist in healing that "injury".
Who understands this process, and is that possible?
Time to put the rebel in her place...preparing to quit smoking
So.......... it's another dismal rainy day in the beautiful Pacific Northwest. This is one of those days, you forget it's supposed to be Spring! The urge to call in sick, stay home, put a fire in the fireplace and light some yummy candles; curl up on the couch with a great book and a furry blanket - it's very tempting. But sigh............not practical at all. lol.
Here's the plan for today:
Breakfast: "Sunshine Sandwich" (like an egg mcmuffin without the cheese and with salsa on it) coffee with my nf milk serving.
Snack: Cookies and Cream "Anytime" vitamin bar
Lunch: Chicken and Sausage Gumbo soup, garden salad with Asian style Sesame dressing
Snack: a crispy sweet Jonogold apple
Dinner: Macaroni & cheese, 1/2 cup cooked vegies
Snack: popcorn
Yesterday only got about 3 liters of water in, and too much diet pepsi. So today scaling it back, and going for at least 5 liters of water. Tonight's plan is walking for 30 minutes to a walking dvd - if I can keep "dangergirl" tied up in the closet; she wants the aforementioned couch, furry blanket and tea in stead.... not to mention she wants to strangle the "instructor" on the video! lol. The woman in the dvd never stops talking! Seriously - I don't think she even breathes!!! Please! Just play the music, and let me walk already!!!! I don't care if you're my coach! I don't care if you're "with me all the way"! ....
Right now I'm extremely sleepy - so debating going back to sleep for a little "catnap" before going to work. Of course that's what "rebel" wants - and "the enforcer" is babbling on about "no, don't do it - you deserve to do some bellydance! Or just get the workout out of the way!"..... And the "compassionate observer" is doing her best to get our of the way and let the other two "battle it out" lol. Uh oh. She's leaning on the side of "Rebel"....
So I'm pretty set on track with staying with my foods..... getting the excersize in place. But lately I've noticed that the smoking is really getting out of hand. That's step 3 - quitting. I'm really nervous about it, and need a solid plan; I know if I try to do it all at once, too soon, that I risk the cnance of everything coming to a screeching halt. I figure at least 2 more weeks to get to the place where I'm solid enough on the eating and excersize, that I can pull this off. I've quit alchohol completely, and that was fine. This shouldn't be so bad - but still I'm very afraid to fail. I just need to buck up, and set the date. So that's one of my goals this month - actually set the quit date.
Any advice on this would be greatly welcomed. I know smoking is terrible - horrible; nasty. But even knowing that doesn't seem to help. Even knowing it's ruining my voice doesn't seem to help. But I also know that trying to lose the weight, cutting out the caffeine, salt, alchohol; trying to get used to excersize and quitting smoking all at once, could really turn ugly. I will do it though. I have to. :)
Yes - I am a professional vocalist - mostly studio work, backups, things like that, as well as demo's for songwriters that submit their goods to Nashville. I also perform locally, and with bands on occasion, as well as on my own at several different venues.
If you'd like to hear some of the songs I've recorded, and no, I'm not famous - only anonymously famous if that makes sense... more on that later, (I'm on 4 of Bob Rivers Twisted Christmas Albums on Atlantic Records...)
The songs on my "myspace" musicians page were written, arranged and he played most of the instruments - by an amazing (and yes he is famous in the jazz circles, and in the Nashville songwriting community) songwriter/musician. I hope to do some more recordings for him soon... but the first three are me singing his tunes - sort of neo-soul/jazz..... and the 4th song, is my son Peter, at age 16, playing some really tasty saxaphone.
I've sung about 20 songs for Bob Rivers Twisted Tunes, he's a local DJ here in Seattle, but his songs have played Nationwide on different radio stations that used to subscribe to his service. I'm a little embarrassed to admit, that I'm the singer on two of his most famous songs...and they're all over utube, people have created their own videos to them....let's just say one is a Brittany Spears song. LOL. Bob's songs are parodies - think "Weird Al", infact, people confuse him with Weird Al Yankovich quite a bit. But the Christmas Albums are the most famous, and can be found just about everywhere at Christmastime.
These songs are just straight originals - demo's I did, but I explain all that on my music page. I've been singing for quite a while - this is one of the reasons I wanted to lose this weight again. I think there's even some old pics on there from when I was in pageant, and was skinny - and when I was in my favorite band (it's the demo pic that they'd hang in the venues)
I recently performed in an amazing concert called Red Piano III, with Australian pianist/arranger/singer/songwriter Bronwyn Edwards Cryer. Red Piano has raised quite a bit of money in the past for schools in the area, with a goal of making sure every child that wants to participate in band, has an instrument to play. It's a cause near and dear to me, because music is dying in the schools. (Yes, along with so many other extra curricular activites, and even sports..) and it's so important to feed that part of a childs creativity - more on Red Piano Later, but it was a huge honor. My son Pete, who just turned 19 also played in the concert with me - what a thrill. He's a brilliant sax and guitar player. We'll be playing again, in Red Piano IV, this coming October. I can't wait to see their faces when they don't recognize me!!!!! The pics on my blog, are from that concert. We had a huge 16 foot screen behind us, playing all these videos, and images during the songs. It was incredible.
Anyway - seriously long winded as usual - here's the link to hear me sing:
I realize I write a lot about different things, and not so much about how I'm actually doing this, or what I'm doing. Settle in. This one's long!!! :)
I'm doing Jenny Craig. I did Jenny succesfully 19 years ago, after my first son was born, and lost 90 pounds. I kept it off until my second son was born, and slowly started gaining again. To be honest, I just didn't care. When I had my accident, a freak disc rupture that left me paralyzed from the waist down for a while, that's when I really gained it all back. I've tried to go back, but haven't been able to gear up - I guess I just wasn't ready. It's taken me a while to get to this point. This time, I went in with a different attitude - and I had done some heavy soul searching. This time was different, because I wasn't doing it for a trip - I wasn't doing it for my husband, or a pageant, or for a performance or to be in a band. This time, I'm doing it for ME. It's hard to explain, but it's this desire, to eat better, because I was so tired of feeling miserable and exhausted, and depressed and in phsical pain all the time. I finally have a job I love, I'm in a good place at home, I'm pretty much healed other than still having pain (that took 7 years, and I'm still healing..) and my weight was the last issue to conquer. I honestly hadn't worried about the way I looked; I had somewhat accepted, this is the way it's going to be, and learned to love myself despite my outside appearance. But there was always that little nagging voice wanting me to fix it. I wasn't eating - and when I say that, I really mean it. I was skipping breakfast, skipping lunch, and for the past several months, skipping dinner at least every other night and just going to bed. I was tired, and just sick of everything, so instead I just didn't eat. I also hadn't done any real excersize in 7 years - since I was paralyzed. And it was too overwhelming to even consider. As a result, I'd trained my body to not be hungry - and I'd also completely killed my metabolism. My attitude about why even bother - killed the rest.
When I went to Jenny Craig this time, it wasn't just to look better. This time it was to feel better - bottom line, this time it was to reclaim my life - before this life consumed me. So I think that the inner motivation, and the attitude, is really a big reason I'm having success. It sure seems easier this time, and I really don't have a better explanation. So this is how it's gone:
This was the end of week 4, and total weight loss is 14.2 pounds and a loss of 12.5 inches. Week one, was a loss of 6.5 pounds. Week two, was a little under 2 pounds. Week three, I was given the "go" to add excersize; put in 4 days of it, followed the menu exactly - excersize was the only difference - and I gained 2 pounds. I was furious.
This week, I have to admit, with my crappy attitude, it led to a sneaky cheat - it also led to me not eating all my food. I skipped a lunch, and also skipped part of a dinner - other days I didn't get all my fruits, or my veggies. This isn't a good idea. I felt slugish, and not as much energy, and I didn't do it on purpose, but I was mad. And I was determined I wasn't going to NOT see a loss - even though that type of behvavior could have led to another gain. Again, don't advise leaving out any of your foods, or you risk throwing your body into "starvation mode". I also cut back on the excersize - really only got 2 good days, and 2 of resistance type stuff - opposed to the 4 hard workouts the week before after doing nothing in 7 years. My body always jumps the first week I add excersize, I always either stall, or gain, and I don't know why, but I know it's water. So I backed off, to see if it would make a difference this week. It did, but I think more than anything, it was not excersizing late at night the night before WI, and more importantly, getting enough sleep that night. Something I hadn't done the week before.
So I'm on Jenny Craig. I follow the planned menu's, and am on 1200 calories. 99% of the time, I follow the menu's religiously - to the point that I don't add salt, I've completely quit alchohol, and until the last couple weeks had also quit caffeine completely as well as diet soda. I now allow myself a cup or two of coffee (which is fine, and free, but in the past they told you to avoid it) as well as soda (again, it was ok, but I was going "old school" Jenny). I'm still not adding any salt to anything however, and for me, I think that's a huge deal because of the tendency to retain water. I'm drinking at least 8 liters of water a day - sometimes 10. When I say I follow the menu; I do not substitute anything. I eat the days in the order they are on the menu. The counselors will tell you it doesn't matter - as long as once you start a day, you finish it. But I've really looked at the pattern of the menu's, and it always seems the last 2 days of the week are lighter - fruit instead of cheescake or some chocolate treat. So I don't even mess with the order of the days. But starting a day, and finishing it -that's really important - it's not so much the calories, but the # of exchanges - fruit, veggies, grains, meats, dairy, and yes, fats. It's important to have a little fat in your diet, and cutting it out can cause you to stall out. Some friends that have done the program, have been told it's ok to switch out their desert - for say a jenny craig cheescake every night. But I don't buy into it - unless you're repeating the same day with the cheescake every day. And even then - that's risky to me. So I'm pretty strict with the Jenny Menu. I don't care what they say, it does change the calorie level of the day - and it messes up the number of exchanges if you're messing things around. And yes, I even eat the things I don't think I'll like - I try it at least once, if I hate it, I try it twice and try to find a way to make it work - I have to learn to eat different - and that means learning to like things I wouldn't go near in the past - ie vegetables, and less meat! If I leave something out, I don't make up for it with something else. And if I have a cheat - like last week - I continued the day as if it never happened - and get the rest of my food in. And in the future, if it happens, I will also add more water and extra excersize to help compensate. But my goal is to not have that happen. Unfortunately, we're human, and it would be unrealistic to think it won't. Besides - the goal is progress - not perfection. And I'm an all or nothing girl, so perfection is dangerous. Moderation is the key - to eventually eat anything I want - but in moderation. And balance - if I make a bad choice, to balance it out by eating right the next day, adding excersize, and drinking more water. And I'd be lying, if I said that will happen overnight for me. But I'm learning. Portion size is also HUGE. We have such a warped perception of what a real portion size is! Example. In my coffee, I used vanilla coffee mate. I realized I was using 1/4 cup - not 2 teaspoons - 2 teaspoons which add up to about 90 calories, and most of it was fat!! Can you imagine how many calories I was getting from coffee alone, at 2 pots a day - add in a couple beers - and even though I wasn't "eating" - I was getting well over 1700 calories a day!!!! No wonder I wasn't losing any weight!
Other than that, I really don't know what it is - I do know that the heavier you start, that the first week is considered "the big drop". I never did the "big" drop - in the past, I did the "medium" drop - then about 1-2 pounds the second week - and the third week usually had a big drop again. Pretty close to what's happened this time.
The typical loss is about 1-3 pounds a week, depending on your starting weight. Someone who hasn't dieted a lot, and is starting out with more weight to lose, can see up to a 20 pound loss in the first week - I've seen it happen - even though it's really rare. But especially the guys - they usually would have a 10 - 15 pound loss the first week, and another 7-8 the next. As a counselor, (I became one after I lost my 90 pounds, I wanted to help others) - I saw one woman, ( I wasn't her counselor but we all knew her) who started at about 310 - drop 20 pounds on the first week - and for the first 3 weeks, she was dropping almost 10 pounds a week. It was too fast, and we had to slow her down a bit; that sounds weird, but that's just too much too fast, and she ended up with an electrolyte imbalance because she was drinking so much water, and losing so fast. As she got closer to goal, she really slowed and really struggled - but that's kind of how it works. It does get harder as you get closer, whether it's lost motivation, or whether your body stalls a bit and fights back. She was an incredible inspiration though, and she lost over 150 pounds, and she's kept it off to this day.
Jenny isn't cheap - but if you are spending money on latte's, fast food, vending machines - it adds up quickly, and if you're following the program and not doing those other things, I found I was actually saving money. But also for me, especially this time, I can't put a price on my health. The amount I could spend in doctor bills in the future, is so much higher than what I am spending now, and hopefully preventing. Diabetes runs rampant in my family - and I don't want that to happen to me. And I'm not getting any younger. I'm also a performer - a professional vocalist. I've started to really perform again, and I was ridiculously out of shape. It was time.
I can tell you that this program worked for me, when nothing else did, and I tried everything. If you follow the menu, eat your foods, don't try to reinvent the program lol, do a little excersize, and have a lot of faith - you are going to succeed. I can't emphasize this enough though:
Whatever program you do - do yourself a huge favor, and do the maintenance. That was my downfall. I did the maintenance - got my money back - but where I failed, was when I started to gain those first couple pounds back, I was too proud, and too "know it all" to go back for help. I was determined it was no big deal, just 5 pounds - I can get it off. Pretty soon it was 8.... then 20.... I never believed I could ever put 90 pounds back on. But it was so easy it made my head spin. And you don't gain back muscle each time - so this time it was 90 pounds of fat......... it's hard to even believe, even now. You have to make this a way of life - and no, you won't be on the "diet" part forever, but after - you've got to change the way you think and act with food. That's the hardest part. Moderation - Moderation - Moderation!!!
This won't come off overnight, and this week was a bit of a fluke - I hope I don't pay for it next week because of not getting all my foods in. But I'm prepared, and know that as long as I'm following the program, I'm feeling better, and have more energy - and I'm losing weight, and I'll get there. Oh yeah! And take your vitamins! So many people say, I don't need them - I have my own. I really believe, whether it's true or not, that this program, with all it's puzzle pieces, is made that way for a reason - and I do so much better, and lose better, when I'm taking the vitamins. They work with the menu's in my opinion, because they're made for the way the menu's are planned. In other words, the people who made up these menus with their exchanges - know what you are missing; and they're made to help supplement that. So in my humble opinion - just grabbing a vitamin off the shelf at the store, may not give you what you really need, even if it's close. I just know for me, if all the pieces are there, I can't fail. So I'm not even going to give it a chance to!!!! Not only that, but if you're worried about the cost - by staying as true to the program as possible, you're going to reach half way faster - then you plan 2 days of your own foods. By the time you reach goal, the idea is that you will know how to plan those exchanges, but at a higher calorie level so you maintain. But the longer you mess around with the program - the longer you'll be on the wl part - and the more money you'll spend. And for me a day of wine, olive garden and cheescake, isn't worth an extra weeks food costs to make up for lost time. I'd rather get this part over with and move on :)
Maybe I'm a little superstitious about it as well. But - it's working for me, and after an almost 8 pound loss this week, and 12.5 inches gone - I'm not going to argue with a good thing!!!!
The most important thing, no matter what you're doing. You need to know why you're doing it. I mean, you really need to know why. If you have been struggling - and you can't answer that question - go back and do some serious soul searching. And if your answer is, "my sisters wedding this summer"..... you need to go deeper than that :) That's temporary - and when it's over, you can almost bet - your weight loss will also be. :) It's a tough thing to do - and it can be emotional, and painful. But until you get to the bottom of it, you're not going to find the strength you need to go the long haul. Then I think you have to accept, that this IS the long haul... this is a life change. A new way of looking at food. That foods aren't good or bad - they're just something that sustains life. That's hard, when you love food. But other things can bring pleasure too - for example my post about the China Lillies. :) It's about learning to rethink why we're eating. You have to go there - and trust me, you'll come out the other side and you'll be so much better for it.
I hope this helps - I know we're all doing different things. But I'm happy to share what I've learned, and what I'm learning to finally apply - (that's a huge difference too!) I know that we can all reach our goals. It doesn't matter how long it takes - or how fast someone else gets there. The important thing, is that we get there. And enjoy the journey - be open to new experiences and don't close yourself down if you make a mistake, be honest with yourself, and learn from it :) Forgive yourself - and move on. :)
I love you guys - lean on your friends here - because this is some of the best support out there. Each of us has it in us to do this alone. But together, we are so much stronger. We are a "village". :)
THAT's What I'm Talking About!!!!! 7.8lbs. in one week!
I can't believe it - I'm so excited I can't stand it! WI was this morning and I broke 230!!!! 229.3.....down 7.8 pounds this week! Total of 14.2 pounds in 4 weeks!!! And....... I've lost a total of 12.5 inches!!!!
I'm happy - I'm feeling better, less pain, more energy, sleeping better - and finding I actually want to move, want to excersize! I can see it this week, I can really SEE the progress.
Hang in everyone - you can do this. If I can do it, anyone can!!!!!
So. It hasn't been the most perfect week this week, in comparison to my other 3 weeks on the program. After last weeks debockle with water retention, I'm a little nervous to get too excited about WI. This morning I'm holding steady at 231.0............but I saw how I jumped five pounds overnight last week despite a perfect week - so I'm nervous. I was back down those 5 by the afternoon, which was infuriating, so I know it's water playing tricks. I think staying up too late - drinking too much water that late - excersizing very hard that late - then getting up 5 hours later all had something to do with it. I also had sat in the hot tub for 2 hours - that couldn't make a difference could it? So I'm going through all these things in my brain - just praying I don't make the same error; whatever I did, to cause the water to jump. I'd say salt, but I haven't added any salt to anything since I've been on plan. This week I had that one slip - could it show it's ugly head tomorrow at WI? I don't think it will; but I really don't know. I'm just nervous. I want to work out - hard - but I'm afraid if I do that, the same thing could happen.
We'll just have to wait and see. I guess though, either way it's a celebration. It's one more week of eating healthy and excersizing! Pretty soon, hopefully, it will be a habit. A way of life - and that's what I'm really trying to accomplish in the end. Feeling better and looking better. It just may take some time :)
And bought a beautiful bouqet of China Lillies!!! You know, those huge white extremely fragrant flowers? Watching them bloom over the past couple days completely sweetened my sour mood, and the entire house smells like a florist. Yummmm. With 2 boys having birthdays,and two giant birthday cakes of various flavors lining the kitchen bar, the flowers are a giant and beautiful distraction. So instead of cake, I take a moment to smell the lillies, and I realize it's not the cake I want, it's just a little moment of joy. One of my new mantra's is food is just food - not good or bad, I mentioned that earlier - but rewards can be so much sweeter than a piece of cake; the flowers have such beauty, make me feel special, and no calories!!! They also last so much longer, than snarfing down a piece of cake - and there's no guilt! What a concept!
I am still struggling a bit with my food this week. I had my first real cheat last night. But the good news, is I was able to figure out why it happened, and I can plan ahead better so it doesn't happen again. And of course, it probably will happen again - we're human. It doesn't make us a terrible person if we have a slip once in a while. I had waited too long to make my dinner - and the family's dinner was on the stove - and no one was coming out to get any, and I ended up grabbing one of the hot dogs and eating it before I even thought - but I still made my dinner, and made a concious note of my mistake. What's scary, is one beef frank - had SEVENTEEN grams of fat!!! When I saw the calories I thought, ok, that's not so bad. But then I looked at the fat content - good grief, we don't get that much fat in 3 days I don't think. Actually I don't know. That would be a good thing to know! I do know we get two fat servings a day, but not sure how many grams that is, and I used to. So I guess it's time to re-educate myself. Scary to think there was a time not so long ago, that I could easily eat 4 of those (sans bun) and feel like I hadn't eaten anything!!!! As disgusting as they are - it's always been a big weakness for me. I think it's so hard to resist for me, because it reminds me of my mom - we used to make "hot dog sandwiches" late at night and watch movies. I don't think it's the food I like as much, as the memory.
This is the first time I've really had a slip - but I praised myself for stopping at one, and getting right back to what I was supposed to be eating - and noting that I need to make my dinner first and have it ready, so that I'm not tempted by what the family has. And it doesn't mean I can't even enjoy a hot dog sandwich ever again. It just means on occasion, and plan for it, and most importantly, if I'm going to "induldge", sit down, put it on a plate, be concious, and enjoy every bit of it. No sneaking it out of the pan and trying to eat it before someone catches me LOL. You have admit, it's kind of funny. That's my rebel coming out - danger girl - trying to get away with something naughty - which means I'm not getting enough attention - and that's true, and another story. Hubby has been on vacation all week, while I'm working, and I think that's part of why I've been so cranky. He's out golfing every day, doing whatever he wants, enjoying the sunshine, going out for a beer with the guys, and I'm working, and carting the boys around, and cleaning the house, and so I need to MAKE time for me. And he needs to at least attempt to make time for us - but again, that's another story, and I've about given up, so I'm going to worry about focusing on me for now.
And so, for me, a beautiful bouqet of huge white China Lillies. Every day another flower on the stem starts to bloom. And every day, another part of my soul - and the girl that I'd forgotten - and the the light inside me, is reminded that I too am starting to bloom :) And the success that comes with blooming? It smells sooooooooooooooooo sweet!!!!!!!
Finally, the sun is shining... I got up early, and am feeling better. I've been in sort of a "bummer fog" the last couple days. Thankfully it hasn't effected my program too much - too much, in that the first day I wanted to just punish my body for not behaving the way I think it should. Instead of binging, or eating things off the menu, I found that I just didn't want to eat. I had to make myself, and even then I ate my jc snack for lunch... slept, and missed lunch, so ate my lunch for dinner and called it a day. Yesterday I left out my choc. cake - I made a fruit "milkshake" using my 2 fruit servings, one "limited" free choice (cool whip) and my milk serving. I used frozen berries, so didn't need ice, and some sweetner - it was really great. But it was so great, I felt guilty, so left out my chocolate cake. Silly, because it wasn't a cheat, it was using the things in my menu to be creative. Jenny is really pushing "volumizing" your foods, they've even added something called "soupatizers" to add with your meals. But I feel like I can hardly get all the food in as it is, and I don't want to volumize right now. As I found yesterday, it made me feel like I was cheating - and then I started thinking, they're just trying to get us eating more of the things they prohibited before, so we'll stay on the food longer. Totally delusional, and that's what happens when you let the negative attitude creep in! What a huge difference a little though can make. It completely spiraled from Sunday until yesterday, and what's the point of feeling bad? I kept going - I'm still following the program the way I should, so why should I feel bad? It's a waste of time I tell you!
So today I'm practicing gratitude again. I'm practicing looking at food, not as good, or evil, but just food. I really haven't obsessed about it this time, and that's been a big help in not wanting to binge. I got a new belly dance dvd yesterday, I only watched it, but it helps get my mind in the right place to convince myself I am an active person. (yes I did excersize this week tho!) Still need to get 2 more workouts in, and I will. I'm going to buy one of those balance balls, those big ones. It looks like it would feel really good on my back, and I also want to get a 3 volume set of Neena and Veena (the belly twins) that has some pretty cool "true" bellydance lessons on it - not just the cardio fitness stuff. So next time I feel bad, I've decided instead of getting in a three day slump mentally, I'm going to don the belly dance duds, and throw on the music, and dance dance dance. :) It's hard to feel bad when you're bellydancing! I also ran out of my vitamin B supp, and I'm thinking that's making a difference in my mood, but mostly my energy level. (and I'm sure not getting in all my food the past couple days hasn't helped)
So today is a new day. I'm not going to waste it. I'm going to celebrate it! Tomorrow is my "baby boy"s birthday - 15. We realized early on, that going on vacation in July was a bad idea LOL. But these two boys are the joy of my life, I'm so thankful, and so lucky that we've been blessed with them. The sun is shining, no more weird spring snow - and I'm ready to take on another day. Hope that all of you are doing great, sticking with your programs and your water and your excersize! Congratulations on another good day in the making -
