Snow? In TEXAS???!!

Why is it snowing here right now when yesterday it was close to 70 degrees?

Who did I wrong in another life????

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaacccccccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!

By the way, I broke my stinking baby finger yesterday. Never realized how much you use that finger - UNTIL YOU WANT TO TYPE!!!

NOT for the delicate~minded

Hello everyone. Hope everyone is having a fabulous day. My day was pretty good. Busy, but definitely in a good way.

I got several emails about my naked neighbor (post below) so I thought I would give a brief synopsis. Actually very funny ~ BUT NOT FOR THE SENSITIVE MINDED INDIVIDUAL!! This is your warning, so PLEASE READ NO MORE if you are easily offended.

My neighbor and myself and my hubby - really do not get along. at all. He is kind of "off" and is supposed to take medication but the meds start working so he quits taking them because he thinks he is normal and then he goes back to being crazy without them. (That means the meds are working - stay on 'em)

Several weeks ago I went outside at about 2:30 a.m. I was suffocating and hot so I was standing outside since it was cool. I hear a moaning noise. Human. aaauuuuuhhhhhh. (however that would be said?) Kind of like I-like-the-way-this-feels-noise. So I walk over to my fence and climb up and look over. YES I DID!!

You have to get the visual here~be creative. My neighbor is a large man. bald. and extremely round. and WHITE. I mean CASPER-the-FRIENDLY- GHOST-WHITE. He was lying on a big blue tarp on the ground. And the moon was full. So he was kind of glowing. Then I see HIS full moon shining.

Here it is folks!!! He was BUTT-ASS-NAKED. And that is not even the worse part. He is moaning again. I said, "What the hell are you doing???!!"

He is startled and kind of jumps/twitches. I look. "Oh my gawd. You stay right there. I am going to get my camera. No one will believe this!!" So I ran into the house and was getting my camera and trying to wake my hubby up. I ran back outside and I got a picture of just his backside.

He had the water hose up his bottom!! No joke. And he told me, "I'm impacted!!" This man is outside at 2:30 a.m., naked, with a water hose IN his butt because he is full of poop??!!

I don't think I laughed so hard in my life. Tears.

So the next day my mom comes over for dinner and I am telling her and my hubby about it and my mom looks at me and says, "oh my word. You spoke to the man? How could you do that?"

WTH??~uuuuhhhhh...I wanted him to know I was there. He needed to know I witnessed this...

My hubby, "You climbed up on the fence? Oh Lord."

WTH??~uuuuhhhhh...HE HAD A WATER HOSE UP HIS BUTT!!!! Why is everyone concerned about what I did? This is too stinking funny.

So, every now and then he walks outside in the front yard IN THE BUFF. I guess just for giggles. I dunno.

Have a great evening and hope you all enjoyed the naked neighbor story.

taebo.diva

My NAKED Neighbor

Hello everyone. Thought I almost fell off of the face of the earth~but I believe I am making it back from the abyss of sickness.

Truly don't know what to make of it and still don't. I don't believe I have ever felt quite so bad. I'm sure I just can't remember a time. My ears feel like someone stuck a hand grenade in there and there is so much pressure.

Not to mention how many times I have been to the restroom. I know, I know. Way too much information.

BUT if I sound stupid, it is because I HAVE POOPED MY BRAINS OUT. There is absolutely nothing left up there. And don't even get me talking about my 'rear.' Way too delicate and fragile right now.

Needless to say, It has been 6 days since I went to the gym. I did work out here at the house today, but that has been it!!

I am down -3.6 lbs this week. (Not bad considering I was up 1 lb last week due to TOM.) That makes my official pounds lost -14.6 pounds since starting WW!!!  Yea me!!! My secret this last week was I had a a Cherry Limeade from Sonic 3 out of the 7 days.  LMAO!!! 

Tonight for dinner I made pizza. 2 slices worth 8.5 points and quite filling. It was absolutely yummy!! I have never been a pizza-maker. It's odd, the things we start doing when we are dieting. My daughter even liked it!!

So, my neighbor and I do not exactly get along. I know, hard to believe, eh?  I don't feel like I am unreasonable. Not at all. Is it too much to ask that I NOT SEE YOUR NAKED BODY??!!  Outside, roaming the face of the earth for all the world to see? Take that mess to the inside of your domain. And, let me tell you folks - He is NO Adonis.

I just ran, screaming, back into my house, "MY EYES.....MY BURNING EYES......!!!" My poor cocker spaniel....she was even running off screaming.

For the love of tiny baby Jesus...

taebo.diva

Mucus ramblings & inspiration

Today is not too bad. Still feel a little under the weather. I am coughing up some pretty nasty stuff. But, at least it's coming out and not hanging around in my body.

I've been reading blogs today (so to all of you Gold members who can see who has been visiting your blog - I am one of them) - I SO want that feature. You guys are all pretty inspring to read about.

One of my favorite magazines is Oxygen.  Great information in there! But, visit the homepage for lots of information and browse around. (for some reason the links aren't working - you can always 'google') great training tips, how-to's, and lots more. I don't invest in a personal trainer and find a lot of this information very useful.

I am going to try and get a good workout in before weigh-in tonight.  If I get to the gym and just don't feel l can keep at it, I am not going to. I have learned to just 'listen to my body' and it it doesn't feel like working out too hard - I am just not going to push it. 

Although I do not have a personal trainer, I do watch the trainers at my gym with their clients. No, not STARE. An ocassional GLANCE.    I watch for form and any pointers they give them.  Do you think that is "theft of service?"  Holy cow, I never thought of that. I hope not.

Take care all and stay out of trouble!!

taebo.diva

Scale Gestapo

Hello everyone! Hope everyone is doing well.

This week I have stayed on plan, worked out Sunday and Monday and took today off. I have been sick today. My body aches and I know I have fever because my eyeballs are burning!!    Sounds ridiculous, I know. Needless to say, I took one of my antibiotics I had left over and actually feel somewhat better. My bones are not aching, at least.

I have taken two long, hot baths today. I don't know why, but baths seem to make me feel better.

Well, tomorrow is weigh-in. Woo-hoo.   I don't think I have done bad this week. I just hate being sick and that is going to mess with it.  Maybe I should just use my no weigh-in pass.  Nah, I will weigh-in and 'man-up' to the scale.

AND to the scale gestapo lady.  

Hopefully, I will feel okay to go to the gym tomorrow. The Body Works plus Abs class - I burn about 1000 calories for that class. It's crazy!! I've been very proud of my efforts at the gym lately. I am going 5 days a week and taking 2 days off for rest. On my rest days, I do a lot of ab work and still do something here at the house whether it is a DVD or something else.

You guys take care - I am off to catch up on blogs!!

taebo.diva

 p.s. - I am so excited about next week's Biggest Loser!! AND - WTF - Paul wore the Yellow shirt?

A plate of Shit? Thanks!

I felt triumphant yesterday evening. Here's the 'scoop' on how everything went:

I DID go to the class! YEA me!!! I did get there early so I could not be bullied by what anyone was NOT saying to me or what I thought they were THINKING. Isn't that crazy? How did I let myself become that insecure over a class? To actually be a mind-reader. I should join a circus. And I made it all the way through the 1 hours class - and got 11 AP's for that!!

WEIGH-IN: I lost -2.4 lbs. Kind of a surprise since I have only been losing .4 and .6 and .2 lbs over the last 3 weeks. I am so happy about that. I know "a loss is a loss" and I am still grateful that I showed a loss during those weeks, but I want so much more than 1.2 lbs loss in 3 weeks. Kind of makes it frustrating.

On another pesonal note I accepted a pretty decent job offer. I have had a couple of offers and was taking a few days to 'mull' over which one I wanted, what would be best for myself and my clients, yada, yada. I was actually going to 'blow' this interview/sit-down off and not even go to it. I decided, "What the Hell? Might as well go." I did and we sat down for a couple of hours. I really like the guy. Good head on his shoulders. He makes me an offer and I say, "let me take a couple of days to think about it. I will call you with whatever I decision I make."

A couple of days go by and he calls last night and asks, "Are you okay with the money?" Well, more would be appreciated. More importantly, I have a couple of other offers I am contemplating as well and I just want to make the right decision. He says, "Ok. How about $xxxxx" Well, alright then. When would you like me to start?  Guys and gals, this price difference is pretty dramatic.

The moral of this story is:

Don't sell yourself short. Not ever. I have been accepting what other people offered me for the last several years. AND I have been offered a plate of shit by some of those people. I was willing to settle because maybe I did not feel I was worth more or maybe I felt they did not feel I was worth more. It doesn't matter anymore.

I am SO OVER THAT FEELING!!

Thanks TO EACH OF YOU THAT COMMENTED ON YESTERDAY'S BLOG. I get to the gym and was looking at the glass door to the class AND MY PHONE STARTS BEEPING!!! (i have a Blackberry so email comes to my phone) as I am reading one, there are more coming through....you guys totally rocked it for me!! You pushed me and motivated me to get in there.

Thanks again and much love to you all

taebo.diva

Bionic Bitch & Monkeys!!

What's going on everyone? Me? just trying and trying to get my post and/or pics to upload to EP!!!!  Someone stab me in the eye!! I have been booted off, flipped off, and who knows what else?

Tonight is THE night. The long-anticipated evening of the week. The "can't sleep or get-anything-done night."

You know what I mean. Don't even 'play.' You guys sit there like it doesn't even bother you and pretend you handle it like a 'piece of cake. (that's not funny to an overweight chic - cake, that is) And NO, it's not S.E.X.

It's weigh-in Wednesday.  I know, I know. Hold the applause. I am so over the bionic bitch behind the counter waiting for me to walk up to the Dark Tower (a.k.a. - the scale). I would try sneaking past her, but I think her monkey arms would catch me and yank me back!!

I'll be sure to let you guys know how it went. .... aaaccccckkkkkk!

On another note, I am dressed and ready to go to that stinking class. There is one this evening before my weigh-in. I have a plan there, also. Always a plan, right?

I am getting there early. Find my spot in the back corner. And, just like someone mentioned in my other post - introduce myself to the instructor so I will stay. You know, the accountability thing?? And if that doesn't work, I need to find a therapist. ASAP. Or, someone punch me in my face.

I'm going to be as curvy as Betty Boop. I don't think I want her big head, though.

Take care and I will blog again soon!

taebo.diva

Titty Baby & Powerless

Okay - so I wen to the gym. Someone needs to slap a diaper on my ass and stick a binky in my mouth. I AM A BIG, FAT TITTY BABY.

For the love of itty, bitty, Tiny Baby Jesus!!

I go into the class, stand there for about 15 seconds, then turn around and leave!! Yes! You read that right. I am a weiner!! I walked out. Know why? LET ME TELL YOU WHY!!! I got this horrible feeling that people would start staring at me. I stood there and watched the class get more full as the seconds started ticking by and I just couldn't do it. WTF!!!

As I stood there looking, I was the biggest woman in there. Everyone one of them girls/ladies LOOKED HUNGRY!! Not one of them had any meat on their bones. I'm overweight, I know this, but ....?????

They have ruined their curves by starving!! - that's a good one. I just thought of that.

I will go. I am determined to go in there. I will get there early next time and get comfortable. I will not be bullied by their non-spoken words or their thin, almost break-able, bodies.

I did at least get a workout in. Weights and just to punish myself for being a coward - I got on the stairmaster. The continuous steps. Dear Lord, That thing should be used for interrogation methods. I thought my heart was going to explode. I will call that HIGH intensity since I could not have spoken a word - not even "HELP".

Tonight I used my George Foreman grill and made dinner and veggies and some pork loin. All for a couple days worth of food and lunches for work. Yummy. I absolutely love this thing. I am so late getting on board with the George Foreman way of life. Everything was cooked in less than 15 minutes. Total. For several days worth of food.

And how come I can't put my text in color anymore? I do, then when I hit 'submit' it's gone. That sux. They need to fix that.

Have a great evening everyone~

taebo.diva

X-rated, grills & HR monitor

Now - how many people 'clicked' on that just hoping for something truly X-rated? Geez, it's in here....

I  new gadgets! I truly do! I can not wait to get it in the mail!! Ok, truth be told, I already have one, a different brand, but I don't think it's working right. So there it is! AND - I found it at 3:31 in the morning on eBay so I only paid $8.12 for it and it is brand spanking new!! And here it is. Not the man, scroll down....it's the Mio Breeze HR monitor!!

My hubby bought me my Valentine's day present. Yea!! I know a lot of women do not like to receive certain household things as presents - but if I am picking it out, buy it for me!! And, yes, I tell my husband what I want. I give him a few options to pick from and as long as he picks one of those, he is good to go!!  Anyways, I used it last night and it was FABULOUS!! I am so late in the game of jumping on this. I even put my Zucchini and Squash on there and it was yummy!!

My thought process is this: "I want to help you. I want you to succeed as my husband so I am letting you know what I want!!"

Remember - I was in the Navy and was stationed with thousands of men and I learned a very important thing from every single one of those men - that is not X rated - They want a woman to tell them. They are NOT mind-readers.

If you guys want the X-rated things, well, I can list those as well. But, hey, as women, we may NOT be mind-readers, but we pretty much know what men want. It's not rocket science.   Goodness, my mind went all to visuals....

Today I am going to try on one of the classes at my gym. I will be sure to let you guys know how that works out. It comes with the membership and I might as well try it out.!! "Body works plus Abs - Work with dumbells to music for overall strength and endurance." Sounds almost like a FIRM video.

Have a great on-plan day!

taebo.diva

A Little 'Ditty'

I am sick to death of EP kicking off my posts and I spend so much time being witty and cute and then I have to re-write it!!

Hope everyone is doing well today. It is Friday evening and I just got home from the gym. I know, sad state of affairs. But I feel fabulous and glad I did stop. I have some stress from the last couple of days!!

To top it off, I found out that a very near and dear friend - Best Friend - is NOT! Betrayed. Lied to. Kaput. In reflection, guess I was more her friend than she was mine. I suppose she felt the need to do it, I dunno. But - TO HAVE A FRIEND, YOU MUST FIRST BE A FRIEND. And - in case we didn't learn this lesson in grade school, "talking bad about people does not make you look any better." Ok, 'nuf said about that.

While at the gym with my handy dandy iPod, this song same on. You know how some songs just put you "there?" This one did it for me. It is just a catchy little song that is happy. I actually started smiling and kept up with the workout!!

What's on everyone's agenda this weekend? I will probably go to the gym and maybe catch a movie.

I did go see The Eye with Jessica Alba in it today. You have to like suspense-type movies with a little creepy factor to them. I liked it. Made me 'jump' a few times. 

Take care all and talk to you soon~

taebo.diva