11/13/2007 13:48
Disappointed.
That's me above. So, my friend talked to her friend, and well, the Marine doesn't like me; in fact, the way she put it, he wasn't only just "not interested", it was something closer to a much more negative phrase (...in my head I coming up with disgusted, loathed, found me annoying, and God only knows what else). What a great self-esteem booster. Alas, I move on. Screw the Marine. Just makes me want to work that much harder to better myself. So, a positive way to look at it is great motivation to get back on track. I weigh in tonight. I will keep you updated on how I do.
Oh, and I survived last night. I'm running on little to nothing now.
11/12/2007 16:35
I'm craving...
... the rain. Seriously. I keep peering out the window at the cloudless, beautiful, sunny sky and wish it would be overcast, gloomy, and dark. I'm ready for the rain. I can't remember the last time we've had it here.
I was EXTREMELY bad this weekend. I partied hard. Drank a lot. And gorged myself of fattening food. And I enjoyed it. Most of it. Except for the part when I got on the scale this morning and saw that I weighed 208. And for the part of how my tummy is rebelling against me from all the junk that I had this weekend. Oh boy does it ache. It's ached all day.
I did meet a really great guy this weekend. I mean, AMAZING. Unfortunately, I had to leave in a rush and didn't get any of his contact information, but I'm trying to get that now (I'll keep you all updated). So, Justin (the guy) isn't like any other I have met. He's sincere, a realist, a great conversationalist, a hottie, incredibly intelligent, and... well, he's leaving next week. To go to Iraq. He's a Marine. And... I'm "waitin' on the love of traveling soldier"... If this works out, I don't know what I'm getting myself into. He was engaged before he left and while he was on tour, he's fiance got impregnated by another guy. I don't know how girls can do that. My heart broke for him. But, I like him. And I wouldn't do that. So, PLEASE CROSS YOUR FINGERS FOR ME!!!
I have a super tight schedule this week. In fact, Between now (4:30pm) and tomorrow at 11:30pm, I only have ONE HOUR of sleep scheduled. Yes, I'm such a busy person that I schedule in my sleep. It's ridiculous. But, I missed all of you this weekend. I can't wait to read your posts. I have another 15 minutes to do that, because yes, EP is on my schedule too. LOL.
XOXO until tomorrow!
11/08/2007 21:28
I'm on TOP OF THE WORLD
I did the elliptical tonight for 47 minutes! I've NEVER done the elliptical for that long!!! EVER.
And I wasn't even like about to die. So yes, I burned 600 calories and I'm excited. And now relaxing on the couch watching ABC. I love Thursday nights!
XOXO
11/08/2007 13:43
Such a sigh of relief...
What a wonderful day! Like, I have been waking up everyday for the past week now it seems like just oh so happy and oh so ready to start the day. Never before in the past three years I have been in college has I looked forward to getting up everyday, taking a shower, putting on makeup, doing my hair, eating breakfast, and reading the news. I feel like a whole new person this week. Why!?!? I mean, don't get me wrong, I love this. I want to be like this forever.
I've always been a girlie-girl, but when it comes to class or work I figure my skin is good enough without makeup to just wing it. I think it's all the encouragement and accomplishments that I am getting that propels me to further my looks. I love it. And you know, when you are dressed, made up, and fed in the mornings, you get so much more accomplished throughout the day. I think I've found the secret to life.
Thank you all for commenting on my blogs. I love reading them, and gosh, it seems like everyone has had a problem with Bank of America. Well, and update on that... I went in and acted as sweet as I could be. I think the woman felt sorry for me and knew how stupid Bank of America really was, so she begged and pleaded my case with the higher ups and got the charges removed... and wah-lah, my account is current. Imagine that? Pssh. I'm still going to change banks sometime next week. I think I'm going to switch to Chase. This is all such a pain, but it needs to be done. Thanks for all of the advice!!!
Food-wise, eh. I'm doing okay. I shouldn't have gone to dinner last night to Mexican and well, eaten bad things for me. But, I did have quite a few points left, some flex points, and then I went to the gym after. I don't feel bad about it. This morning I had a bagel and schmear. Gosh, sometimes I wish I was Jewish. I mean, they have such good food!!! My friend invited me over for Yom Kippur and I had some noodle dish that was AMAZING. So, yes, can I please be Jewish and eat good food? LOL.
And then, today! GASP! How could I not post this.... So, my university has implemented a new alert technology that texts your cell phone, calls you, and emails you when there is reason to evacuate the campus, i.e. Virginia Tech. Well, I'm sitting in the library, typying away at a paper and my cell vibrates. I don't recognize the text number but continue reading.. It said: ATLANTA CAMPUS EMERGENCY ALERT. Evacuate campus immediately and tune into local media for additional information. I look around in disbelief, and see others reading their texts in bewilderment. No one wants to say anything because... this really can't be real. And about after two minutes a guy finally gets up and says, "I live on campus, I don't know where I'm evacuating to, but I'm getting the hell out of here." More people start to follow in pursuit, but... This still can't be real....
And then. An announcement over the library intercom: PLEASE DISREGARD anyd message you have received about evacuating campus. Whew. But honestly, for those few minutes that no one knew... I was scared. Now, I'm a little pissed. Because I have been recieving emails and texts and phone calls telling me to evacuate and to disregard and to evacuate and to disregard for the past thirty minutes. So, here's the thing, if someone wanted to do something now... they totally could!!!! I mean, no one would evacuate because they would just blow it off again. SO great, I could die. LOL. Seriously.
But, despite the drama of my life, I'm great... Off to read your blogs and make sure you all are as happy as me!!
11/06/2007 23:43
Wowzers.
Whew! What a day...
Started off so well, and ended so poorly.
I'm super involved in school. I was asked to be a representative of my major today at school in the Majors Fair (where current students go to learn about switching into other majors and what other majors are offered). I like being asked to do things like this. It makes me feel important. So yes, I felt important this morning. And I saw my ex's mother and father at the fair (they're advisors at my university). I looked good. They saw me. I felt important. Good so far. LOL.
Then I had lunch with three of my friends. We discussed what we were doing after school. It was a good talk. Not so healthy food, but I definitely counted it in my points and I was fine. Just super chill lunch and I needed that.
Then was class. It was boring as per usual. But I got a lot of things done. Like emails for other organizational thing, keep up with some long distance friends, and some budgeting (I'm foreshadowing here). So, I'm feeling accomplished. And that is good.
And then I weighed in. And I didn't gain weight, just stayed the same. And considering the ridiculous amount of partying I did this weekend, the unhealthy dinner Friday night, the drinking on Halloween, the Waffle House on Halloween, the 15 shots and 5 mixed drinks on Friday night (the list really does go on) and being on TOM, I think that's pretty damn good. The meeting wasn't so great because there are so many new people. I LOVE that people are coming, it's just I also like small groups. I'm torn. But, I didn't gain weight. So that was good.
Then a WW buddy asked me to come over for a WW meal she cooked with her daughter. I had a great time. The food was good. Her daughter and her daughter's boyfriend were sweet. There was a little drama that was silly. It lasted like two hours. I felt wanted. It was good.
And then.
I came home and checked my bank account online because it had some weird negative balance for like two days, except that I had a positive balance when actually reviewing the account. I checked today and I have 5, yes, count them, FIVE OVERDRAFT CHARGES of $35.00 each. What in the hell?!!?! I had deposited money on Friday. Went out and spent a good bit of money this weekend, and none of the charges went through until yesterday... So, that should have been more than fine. Upon calling and bitching at Bank of America, I found out that the money from the check deposited was held until yesterday... EVEN IF THAT IS TRUE, THERE WAS MONEY IN THE BANK WHEN THE CHARGES WENT THROUGH! Bank of America sucks. They like to screw with you. They told me they couldn't do anything until the pending overdrafts went through tomorrow. Well, they are going to be dealing with one angry bitch at 8am. I am not putting up with this shit. I'm closing the account tomorrow. And still livid. I can't remember the last time I was this angry.
So yes, good turns to bad in like 1 second. Funny how that happens.
Focusing on the positive though. No gain. People like me. I have friends. I'm going to be okay. Minor temporary set back. I'm on this.
Just wanted to let you each know that I love you all. While I may never get to meet any of you, I want you to all know that I am SO PROUD of each of you, because no matter how much weight you lose... You've all put one step forward by starting a blog. You are headed in the right direction. ALWAYS remember that.
XOXO
11/05/2007 11:38
Really ready to get this under contol...
... and by "this" I mean EVERYTHING. I feel so motivated to get everything organized right now. Like, not a lazy bone in my body.
I'm going to gain weight again when I weigh in tomorrow. I don't want to weigh in. This is in fact, the first time this time around that I am dreading weighing in. I wanted to be down to 200 pounds by Thanksgiving... And unless I magically lose 7.8 pounds in 18 days, it's just not going to happen. It's because I've been really bad this past week. And while I'm trying not to beat myself up about it, I know it's just another week I'm being set back, another week farther from my goal.
To make matters worse, I'm going out Friday night to Lotus Lounge because my best friend is coming to town. I'm really excited, but that's how this weekend went down the drain--alcohol. I'm going to try my best to limit my food beforehand and save some room for some drinks... I just have to be SO CAREFUL. I will not go over my points this week. And yes, I write down EVERYTHING ALWAYS... so I know I went 100s of points over my flex points. Argh. But I can fix it:
Plan: Stay within points while concentrating on the 8 GHG and busting ass in the gym for at least 45 minutes every day. I can do this. And I will do this.
On another note, I'm really glad that they have fixed the posts. I missed my old posts. It's really helpful to be able to go back and review them, and because we all don't just post about our weight loss events, but real life events... our posts include our lives. I'd be lost without mine. Seriously. So, thanks EP for fixing the problem even though you really never addressed it.
Off to comment on your blogs.
XOXO
10/29/2007 11:22
I'll do this the right way...
Tomorrow... The scale is going up. At least three pounds. And, really, I couldn't stop myself from eating this weekend. I don't even think it was the thought of food. No. I know it wasn't food or me being hungry. It was control. I haven't been so on top of things in my life... and as sick as this sounds, I was putting food in my mouth to punish myself. I didn't feel like I deserved to see the scale go down. I didn't think I was working hard enough to get there. And I was putting to much emphasis on getting to a certain weight by a certain time. You can't do that. It's nice to have goals, and even nicer when you meet them. But you can't have an unrealistic goals. I can't be 30 pounds lighter by January 10th. There's no way. I had even thought of resorting to pills, fad diets, and well... throwing up. And after making myself realize that.... Being 20 pounds lighter by the 10th would be a big deal. And I have over two months to get there.
So... I'll stop stuffing the food in my mouth and start exercising. I haven't in five days. I should be shot. There I go again, negative reinforcement. I can do this. I can get there.
It's because of this guy. I don't even know why I try to impress him so much. Hell. I can't impress him. He lives 952 miles away (thanks MapQuest). But you guessed it, I'm going to see him on January 10th for my 22nd birthday. And I want to look good. I mean, damn good. He was "with" me at my highest weight when he was down last February. Yes, I'm obsessing about a guy who I haven't seen in almost a year. But, for someone else to see a change, not just my roommmate, or my meeting leader, or my parents... For some hot guy to be like, "Wow. What happened to you?!? You are gorgeous." That's like adding even more motivation to my effort. I know, I don't need that kind of motivation.. But seriously... Just a tad always helps.
So, I'll focus... I can do this. And sorry for the post. I'm in a weird mood today... But on Points nonetheless...
10/27/2007 10:34
Blew it
Came home last night. Didn't feel good. Not understanding why I am up 2.6 pounds when I have been sooo good, so I decided I'd give my body a reason to be up. I ate... and I ate... and I ate... and I ate. Yeah, I could keep going on. Now I'm mad at myself. Argh. Oh well. We all mess up at some point. So, time to get back on track today.
I've just been under so much stress with this wreck and school. I really do need to get on top of things. And this is the weekend to do it!!! No more procrastinating. Let's be proactive. And work out A LOT!
10/25/2007 22:46
Obsessed
That's me. I'm obsessed. I can't stop thinking about how much weight I need to lose and the quickest way/amount of time I can do it in. No, I'm not being unhealthy about it, by any means. I know what healthy weight loss is. I'm following my Points. Eating what I'm supposed to and working out. It's just that my weight is ALWAYS on my mind. I can't even focus in class because I'm so obsessed. I know this has had to have happened to a few of you... What have you done to stop it?
Okies. Hopefully to bed so I don't think about it. (I'll probably just dream about it instead...)
XOXO
10/24/2007 22:30
Just a...
... minor update. I'm feeling fat. I can't exercise right now because of the car accident. I'm just hurting too much. And while I've stayed in my points.. I"m just feeling extra large right now...
BLAH.
