Good: I had my WI last night and lost another 2.4 pounds for a total of 25.4!!! I got my washer for my 10 percent key chain and a 25 pound magnet. I was so excited. Only 75.4 more pounds to go!! And I've come this far, so really, it doesn't seem like that much right now. They have started calling me skinny-mini at work now. It's a good feeling. And I had lunch with a friend I hadn't seen in a while today and she just couldn't stop telling me how great I looked. I know I'm supposed to be doing this for mainly health reasons, but honestly, I love getting compliments like those. My journey has inspired a leader to recommit. I've had one of my bosses talk to me about weight loss. She's a Lifetime member of WW and used to be a leader, but she's let some weight slip back on. I wouldn't say any more than 15 pounds, and she lost over 75, so not so much as before. She's (hopefully) going to come to my meeting with me next Tuesday. But, all good things must come to an end...
Bad: I got into a ridiculous car wreck last night. Obviously I am doing fine, as I am sitting her giving you an account of it. My arm has started hurting today and it's run up into my neck on my right side. I'm hoping I just slept funny... But yes, I was in a four car wreck last night. It was dark, wet, and the roads were really slick. I know for sure I wasn't following to close and I know for sure there wasn't any traffic in that lane, but what I don't know is why he slammed on his brakes. As soon as I saw his break lights come on, I stepped on mine. And for the first time in my life, I knew I didn't have any control of my car. It scares me so much just thinking about it. I just slid... and slid... and my breaks didn't do anything. And I hit him and another car hit me and the car behind that car hit him. Except, none of us knows what order it went it. All I know, is I'm honestly afraid to drive in the rain again. It took a lot of strength for me to turn on my car this morning. So... everyone PLEASE be careful driving. I'm facing a lot of consequences (insurance and now a court date), but even more I'm facing the emotional wear and tear. So, yes, just because your driving carefully doesn't mean other cars aren't... Just take a lot of caution.
That's my 25 pound magnet and my washer on my key chain above. I was so proud receiving them!!! The picture's not so hot because it's my camera phone, but you get the point.
Let's face it, all of us have gone through that phase at least once in our lives (I've been going through it my entire life) where people tell you that you have such a pretty face, or such a nice smile, or such high cheekbones... when inside, you know they are saying to themselves... She's such a pretty girl, if only she'd lose some weight. Well, BUH-BAM!!!I'm doing it. So yes, why should I be pretty, when I can be gorgeous?
So, I went home this weekend. Gracious. Such drama (but we won't get into those juicy details-LOL).
Before I left this summer, I taught my grandmother the Weight Watchers method. I've been checking back and forth with her to see how she's been doing over the past few months... And wow. If anything is a testament to Weight Watchers working it's her. She had a broken pelvis, a bad back, sore and swollen knees, and all kinds of other problems and weighed 144.4 pounds as just 4'9". When I saw her this weekend, I just wanted to cry. She's DISAPPEARING! She's at 121 pounds and keeping up at marathon's pace! She's doing it all on her own and can't really exercise because of her health problems. I couldn't be more proud of her. I wish my dad and step-mother would get the hint...
I also so my best friend this weekend! And she just couldn't get over how good I looked and how much I had changed in such a short amount of time. Seriously, sometimes it's the compliments that gets me through the rough patches. I love her so much!!!
And then last night, I went out with these two guys. Yes, not one... But TWO! Seriously. One of the guys invited me to come to a movie with them (and I thought that he was the one that was seriously into me, but then wham!). The other guy was hardcore flirting and trying to find reasons to brush up against me. It was so awesome sitting in between these two guys at the movies who were both so obviously into me. I just ate it up! (and it didn't cost me any Points, LOL)
So yes, good evening. Semi-good morning despite the traffic from driving back from their place (LOL)... Get your mind out of the gutter! I slept on the couch! And now at work about to go write on all your blogs!
Here's to yummy healthy food and some exercise (yes, that's right... I used the "e" word because I like it now!) in such a rainy Atlanta day!
You ever have those days where you just feel SUPER FAT?!? Well, that's me today. My clothes aren't fitting any tighter or anything. I think it is just the guilt of last night... I drank quite a few beers that went over my points, and that would have been okay if I hadn't had McDonald's after that. And I'm not talking a salad, I'm talking the full deal... Fried chicken sandwich and French fries... It wasn't event that good. Do you ever just want something because you can't have it? That almost happened again today when we went to the Cookie Barn, but I thought about last night. And yeah, while a cookie might taste good, those compliments and those clothes fitting better tastes SO MUCH BETTER. LOL. But, nonetheless, I went and weighed myself just now and I'm down two pounds. I just hope the scale reads that way on Tuesday...
Okay. Off to cook dinner and then watch Desperate Housewives!!! I'm so excited. I love ending my nights with some good easy viewing!
Not much going on, just chill. I'm just in the down time portion of my day right now. Work at Tech this morning and about to leave for work at ULTA tonight. Uggh. I hate working until 10pm. Well, not really hate it, but don't really like it tonight. I just want to be lazy all day.
I didn't go to the gym yesterday. I felt it. Seriously. I never knew how much going to the gym could actually effect me. I mean, I feel physically and emotionally better when I do. So, when I get home from work tonight, I will definitely be going to the gym. I've been on points today... Had yogurt and granola for breakfast and went to DocGreen's for lunch. I love that place! And I love even more that it has nutritional facts on its website. Yay! Okay, well, just a quick update.
YAY ME!! I watch the Disney Channel... A LOT. And well, whenever London Tipton of the Suite Life of Zack and Cody does something good, she yells "Yay me" and claps her hands. I've been doing that for the past 18 hours. I finally reached my 10% target!And am now down 23 pounds!! Again, yay me!! I'm so excited. And this past week I worked so hard to get those 4 pounds I gained over vacation the week before and then another 1.4 off. I just can't believe I actually have lost 23 pounds. I know I have been doing it for a while, but still. It's just a relief to know that I can do it and I can accomplish my goals. I got my key chain last night too! And of course everyone was super excited. now... Just 77 more pounds to go!!! But, only 2 pounds until I reach my 25 pound mark! YAY ME!
Well, just thought I would keep you all updated on my WI. And happy eating and "activity" to you all today!
It's funny. I was nearly having a nervous breakdown yesterday and I blogged this horrible post. I was expecting to have to come back and delete it, but apparently it ended up not posting for whatever reason. Thank goodness!
I think I am over my anxiety for now and hopefully I can get through the rest of the week. I have so much homework to catch up on. I have been completely unmotivated this semester. Part of me isn't even interested in getting good grades... just hoping to get through the semester. MOTIVATION PLEASE COME TO ME!!
Oh, but speaking of motivation... I have worked out for like three days in a row, which is UNHEARD OF. So, yay me!!!
I weigh in today!!! I love weigh in days, whether they are good or bad. Like, I seriously get excited at the thought of getting on that scale, evaluating my week, and hanging out with all of my WW friends as we wait for the meeting to start. I love everyone at WW because no matter our age, our background, our ethnicity, we all have one thing in common--our weight problems. And through that, we are able to connect on such a level... I know that whenever I need support, not just with my food issues, but with anything, I can turn to them.
Wow. I'm such a flippin' crazy person. Yesterday, I was like, "Oh, my life is on the brink of ending with no hope in sight..." and today I'm just so happy. Well, better happy than not.
I can't eat. There's something wrong. I don't know what it is. I just feel like crying, but I can't. I sit there and try to force myself to cry, and I can't. I know something bad is going to happen. I just don't know what and I don't know when, but I know it's going to be life changing. I started feeling this way yesterday morning and did just about everything to get the feeling to go away. And then I thought I would just go to sleep early to forget about it. Well, it's still here. It's not something you can forget. I just don't know what to do. It's making me lose focus on everything.
I've felt like this twice before: 1) when my mom died, and 2) when my ex broke up with me after a long and serious relationship (we were talking about getting engaged).
I'm scared. And miserable.
And ready for it to just happen.
Just had to get this off my chest. Thanks for reading.
Gosh. Vacation was gorgeous. Five days on the warm sunny beaches of the Gulf Coast digging my feet into the pure white sand and gazing across the endless deep blue of the ocean. When I'm on vacation, I feel empowered and limitless. A little wild streak comes out in me that's even wilder than when I party here at home (which is already wild by many people's perceptions). I just feel so free.
Well, I came back early from my vacation to weigh in last night. GASP. I know; what moron comes home early to weigh in. Most people run from the scale when they come home from vacation. No, not I. I was still feeling the empowered stage. Well, that was until I stepped on the scale. I seriously almost didn't stay for the meeting. I knew I was going to gain weight, that was not a shock. In fact, it wasn't really much of a shock that I gained 4 pounds (LOL). It was more of the fact, that I enjoyed it so much. That's what is scary. The leader asked if I would do it again, and my prompt response was, "I do it again and gain another four if I had to." And that's the truth. So, I guess it's a good thing I didn't stay longer. But, it'll come off. I'm not worried. It's okay to have a good time every now and then. Now, if I can just get to 200 by Thanksgiving, I will be so excited!
I'm a little stressed out now. I am supposed to have done all this work over vacation, and I haven't done a single thing. I'm dropping this one class, but that brings my dropped hours to 29. No, I'm not a moron (but I am afraid that is what it is going to look like to grad schools). I just like to try out classes, see how much I can handle, and whether or not I like the class. I mean, I work two jobs on top of taking 18 (now 15) hours of classes. Isn't that enough?
And, I really feel like you should be able to put on your resume: X number of years changing my lifestyle, so that when you do interview me, you don't have a bias because of my weight, and so that when you do hire me, I don't conk out on your floor because of my massive heart problems due to my food issues.
Changing your lifestyle takes work and effort and time. And doing it on top of everything else just wears me out. Which brings me to my next point: ACTIVITY! Yes, we shall call it "activity" because "exercise" scares the be-jesus out of me. I'm going to have to start committing to an exercise routine, and I'm going to start today.
It's one of my best friends 21szt birthday's tomorrow... I'm going to dinner with her and her family and then we are going to be out at the bars all night with all of our friends. Talk about another obstacle to get over... Well, I can do it. I mean, what else are obstacles for, but to get over them?
So, I haven't posted in a LONG time. School has been ridiculously hectic and working two jobs on top of that is killing me.
So, a few updates on me physically: I have lost and gained over the past month and a half; mainly because I just wasn't sticking to WW. It's so frustrating to watch people just eat and eat and not have to care. And then I start thinking, well, if they don't care, than maybe I shouldn't either. It's not like they are even thin/healthy people. But, I have to care. It's the only way to a healthier and happier (and hotter) me. So, I have sucked it up for the past three weeks and have continually lost weight... 7.8 pounds in the last three weeks to be exact. I am down to 209.2 and so incredibly proud of myself. My waist is smaller and I have dropped a size from when I first started. I have also colored my hair a reddish brown and switched makeup colors for the fall... I'm on my way! (I'll try to post an updated picture today)
In terms of life, so much going on. I had a huge falling out with two of my friends and basically just cut them off. I can't deal with the stress of people and their problems with my own issues. They would just say such hateful things; like when I would lose weight, they would be like, "Oh, you'll gain it back next week. It's just water weight. Don't get excited." Talk about super supportive (note the sarcasm).
School-wise, I have three exams tomorrow. Two of them are going to be take-home and the other one is going to kill me. And don't think take-home means that it is super easy. I'd much rather have an in-class exam. And I also have a prospectus and an annotated bibliography due as well. Let me kill myself now. Argh.
But nonetheless, I am glad to be posting again. It relieves some stress and I know all of you EPers are so supportive in every pound that each person loses. I hope you guys have a fabulous Wednesday!!!
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