A Big Sigh of Relief
I'm quickly coming to the conclusion that parenting, like most of life, is 60% action and the rest is prayer. I've spent the last year expecting too much of myself and paying the price for it. I mean, in everything else I just dive in and get the results I want. Somehow, parenting doesn't work that way. Probably because it's 24/7 and I am human. I am feeling a great big sigh of relief now that we have changed our child care situation. I'm learning to accept the fact that I am a working mom and I need time to work and take care of myself. I wish we lived near family. I wish I didn't have to work. I wish a lot of things. But for me and my perfectionist nature, I think parenting is teaching me to learn to live in the gray areas of life. Not surprisingly, I felt much better about the food yesterday - another sign that I made the right decision.
I've never though of myself as a "Keep up with the Jones" type person. However, I was comparing myself with every stay at home Mom and that's not fair because I do work. So, there you go. I'm a working Mom who is doing her best to balance it all.
And in the end, I want to be healthy and rested for everyone to be the best me I can be.