Meh

Do you ever feel like this whole weightloss thing is just to hard? Like you just cant be assed, and you'd much rather devour a upsized kfc works burger meal and a chocolate bar?

That's how i feel right now. Had a really, really shit day at work. Like, really shit.

And i feel like just meh.... the weight isnt going to go anywhere. I eat too much shit still.

I REALLY CANT BE ASSED

Food yesterday:

• 1 strawberry yoghurt (186)
• Carmans muesli bar (197)
• 2 slices light rye (163)
• cheese (85)
• turkey slices (22)
• turkey chops (204)
• bread roll (204)
• Mashed potato (42)
• Watermelon (45)
• Kiwi fruit (52)
• Strawberries (7)
• 3 corn cakes (67)
• cottage cheese (115)
• 1 slice light rye (81)
• cheese spread (58)
• Orange juice (76)
• Total: 1579

I ate a lot.

This is a bit naughty....

Ways to kiss (I scored 41!) (stolen from Kel) Cross which ones you've done......  

Shouldnt I be looking FORWARD to the weekend?

The weekend is shaping up to be a super busy one. Arent weekends designed to have a break from work?!

Tomorrow night i have to work late (yes, a FRIDAY NIGHT) and wont be home till about 10pm. Having said that though, i'll come into work at about 10am so hopefully i can squeeze in a work out in the morning.

Then Saturday i'm having brunch with a friend at about 11am in the city (about an hour from my place) so hopefully can squeeze in a workout that morning too. Then my parents will be around so i'll visit them in the afternoon. Hopefully i'll get home late afternoon so i can chill for hte night.

Sunday the boy has football - sigh. Only three more games left of the season! We have to travel 2 hours to get there and 2 hours back. I wonder if i can rush a quick run in the morning, or if i should give it a rest?

I'm going to do a bodyjam class tonight too... wohoo!

I'm a bit stressed about Saturday - my first weigh in since being on holidays. When i went to the gym on Tuesday i was realllllllllly tempted to weigh myself. I was so curious about whether i'd put weight on (i have to have, surely). But i really, really want to stick to my once weekly weighing routine. Saturday morning after eating a banana or something small-ish and going for a 20 minute run.

SO I'M NERVOUS! SATURDAY! EEK! I dont want to move my graph up. Argh!

If anyones a Calorie King member, my name is SPARKLYSTAR - feel free to find me and check out my stuff.

S

Why?

Do you talk about things when you dont know if that's what you really want anyway?

On our holiday I kept bringing up marriage with the boy. Now, i love him to bits and still get flutterbies in my belly everytime i see him even though we've been together for 2 1/2 years. But i'm 22, and the idea of me being engaged at 22 bloody scares me.

So, why do i keep bringing up the topic with him? why do i always talk about our wedding, or basically ASK HIM why he hasnt proposed to me yet? We were sitting in Nandos (of all places) on our holiday, and i was grumpy for some reason. And i basically straight out asked him why he hasnt popped the question. Me rambling on about how i know he's the one for me and i wanna be with him forever, and blah blah blah.... and me not understanding why you wouldnt marry someone when you know for sure you want to be with them (as he says he does). Like, what stops you?

He told me that money was an issue ... wanting to buy me a nice ring and stuff. I straight out told him that was a cop out - and i kind of think it is, but i said it a bit harshly. I said to him that i wouldnt care if he popped the question with a $2 ring from a vending machine.

But, why do i hassle/ask/talk about marriage, if i dont even know thats what i want to do right now? I want to travel and have fun. We live together anyway, so it's not like i dont get to see him.... I just dont get it. I dont understand why i always bring it up. GRRRRRRRRR.

Maybe it's a security thing. I've also never been self concious or insecure until this relationship. It has nothing to do with him, he's sweet and lovely and beautiful and i trust him completely. It's a me thing. But still... maybe it's a me thinking that he'll never run away if i get a ring, which i know on the thinking part of my brain is utter crap. Hello? look at the divorce rate.

Anyone offer any advice?

Went to the gym yesterday which was great. Had fun - my knee was a bit sore though, think from all the impact of netball on Sunday. Might take a bit of a break from the high impact for a bit. I was going to go for a run at the gym tonight (well, actually really WANTED to), but i think i'll get my tax done instead - fingers crossed the government will give me lots of money back!

Oh, and my new food discovery - steam fresh vegies. I've always been a bit anti frozen vegies because i dont feel like they're as fresh. I was wasting a lot of vegies in my fridge though. I thought i'd buy a packet of the steam fresh to give it a go. OHMYGOD they taste just like real vegies. And, for a timepoor me, it means i dont have th chop them up, the sachets are already portioned out... i just whack them in the microwave for 3 1/2 minutes. Loveit, definitely going to be part of my weekly staples.

I ate pretty well yesterday - fat was around 47.2 grams and i'm meant to be around 44 - so about 3 grams over. I ate about 100 calories under my reccomended intake, but i wont die from that.

I ate:

• Fibre plus ceral (158) Banana (80) Skinny milk (78)
• Ravioli (209 Alfredo sauce (132)
• Steamed fresh vegies  - cauliflower, carrots, beans (35)
• Butternut pumpkin (9)
• 100g chicken drumsticks (240)
• Carmans muesli bar (197)
• Ski Yoghurt (186)
• Real McCoy Popcorn (101
• Total: 1426

Back to normal life...

It's amazing how quickly normal life comes back and you forget about your holiday. Was VERY hard to wake up this morning - i hit the snooze button twice and almost missed my train. I cant wait until winter is over and daylight savings starts (don't know if Americans have that.... but in summer we move our clocks forward an hour so we get an extra hour of sunlight). It's really hard to wake up at 6am and it's still dark.

But back with worklife comes routine which is something i've realised i need on my weightloss journey. I need to plan ahead to ensure i dont have any excuse to slip up. With that means cooking dinner and making lunch a night in advance - that way i'm not reaching for a sugary milk drink or takeaway.

Realise i had a fairly average day yesterday foodwise. I ate a choc chip muffin. FOR BREAKFAST. and then i had a scone with cream and jam for morning tea. I LOVE scones. I tried really, really hard to resist, but i couldnt. Then, i had home made pizza for dinner (not too bad) and then i had a mcdonalds choc fudge sundae for desert. ARGH! Bad. I so have to go to the gym tonight now.

I think i'm going to copy my EP besties Kel and Aly and slightly modify my goals. Although my overall goal is 80kgs (176lbs) by xmas (so basically a 20kg or 45 lbs loss), i want to get down to 90kgs (198lbs) by September 22.

The main reason for this is that it's the boy and my 2 1/2 year anniversary, and, well, i cant think of any other special dates before xmas. SO, it's a good one to focus on. It'll be about a 10kg loss (22lbs)

So:

Goal 1: down to 90kgs by September 22 2007

Goal 2: down to 80kgs by December 1 2007

They're completely attainable. Easily.

Life is good right now. My break did wonders for my brain. I'm relaxed and HAPPY!

Better not get too far ahead of myself...hehe

Love,

SpArKLes

Goal for the day: I dont want this to sound terrible because i'm not trying to insult this woman at all, and i'm sure she was a lovely person... but... On the plane on the way back from my holiday there was a lady who needed an extender on her seatbelt because it didnt fit her. At first she tried to hide it - pretend her seatbelt was already on. Then the air hostess (who was gorgeous and tiny) went "oh you havent got your belt on" and made a bit of a deal about it, came back with the extender. Then later in the flight another attendant came over and said to the woman and the random people sitting either side of her "there's a spare seat up here if someone would like to sit there"...

Now, i'm sure (and hoping) none of these airline staff meant any malice. But gosh, poor woman. Not only was she probably really uncomfortable in her seat, but she probably felt incredibly humiliated too.

I dont ever want to get like that. I dont ever want to get so big that my seatbelt doesnt fit on a plane. I felt so bad for the poor woman.

Food eaten yesterday:

• Fibre plus cereal (158 cals) and skinny milk (41 cals)
• 2 slices light rye bread (163) small tin of tuna (67) Tomato paste (18)
• Pizza (245ish)
• Choc chip muffin (476 - so not worth it. Wasnt nearly that good)
• scone (128) jam (40) cream (33)
• Carmans muesli bar (197)
• Popcorn (54)
• Mcdonalds sundae (328)

Total: 1950 - meant to be around 1560. I did no exercise. I ate 60 grams of fat. BAD!

Sunkissed, bronzed & tanned....

Now all i have to do is get skinny!

Had a fantastic holiday - thanks for all your posts while i was gone.

I went home from work early last Tuesday because i was sick - was developing a cold, but it got really bad really quickly. It didnt progress like a normal cold. So i went home, laid in bed for a few days (like literally did not leave the bed or couch). I felt TERRIBLE. was on antibiotics, developed bronchitis, was really yuck.

Luckily though i'd improved somewhat before we flew out. I was sstill coughing my lungs out, but i was determined to go on holidays and see some sun!

We arrived mid morning on Saturday. We just kind of chilled out most of the day - drove around looking at the sights. We drove into the main tourist area and had lunch - me and chips episode 1. I did order chips and crumbed fish. Although pretty bad, i figured chips and fish is better than chips and fried chicken.

We checked into the hotel too - amazing views. We were on the third floor - and no elevator, so lots of stair climbing for me over the next few days!

Sunday we packed a picnic and went on a drive up to the rain forest - it was beautiful. I did eat some chocolate fudge that day, but we took a roast chicken and salad so relatively healthy.

Monday we went to the water theme park - how fun! I had an absolute ball. Climbing lots more stairs here up the waterslides. I ended up going with the bathers, board shorts and a singlet over the top. Didnt feel out of place at all - lots of people were doing the same. And i realised that i actually preferred shorts and singlet - i was scared my bathers would fall off/come undone on a ride! We bought sandwiches from a bakery to take with us, rather than spending the typical $15 on a hot dog and coke theme park prices. So i had a bread roll with chicken and mayonaise. We went to an incredible Thai resturaunt tonight too - i had a creaemy curry (chicken massaman) which is my favourite! We also ate appetisers, and i got a little bit tipsy.... hehe. I ate too much - you know when you feel sick? I'm actually kind of glad i ate that much - it reminded me how gross it felt to be that full.

Tuesday we went to a beautiful place called Byron Bay. Gorgeous. Layed in the sun all day, had a fantastic breakfast of smoked salmon on sourdough and poached egg. I love breakfast - it's my favourite meal of hte day.

Wednesday we went to another theme park, walked around lots was fun. Took a packed lunch again - this time a foccacia with chicken and cheese. Went to a great Japanese resturaunt too - yum teppinyaki!

Thursday we shopped. I love shopping... but who doesnt!? I ate Nandos for lunch -(Chips episode #2) chips and chicken thigh, yummo. For dinner we went to a cabaret show called Draculas - was great fun. Drank way too much and ate some fantastic food - beautiful steak and mashed potato

Friday we went back to an earlier theme park and rode the rides ...woohoo! Went to a sushi train that night - how fun! I'd actually never been to one before, it was so exciting!

Saturday was our last day.... how sad. We kind of just vegged around the beach, the boy went go karting. I pigged out at lunch tiome - chicken snitzel and chips, but it was SO GOOD.

Overall, food wise was pretty OK. I didnt deprive myself, but i did make better choices when i could (toast or fruit and yoghurt for brekkie rather than the bacon and eggs the boy ate most mornings!)

I feel much better now too - cold has pretty much gone away, still a little bit stuffy though. It's amazing what sunshine can do!

So i'm ready to jump back on the bandwagon. I've been reading some blogs (namely Aly and Kel) and they've motivated me so much. I'm ready to get back into it!

I've started playing netball again which is fun. I played last night - am a little bit sore today! very out of touch. I love team sports though, so i'm really glad i'm doing it. I hope i stick with it, and become a permanent team member.

I'm sure i'll blog again later today, but for now... i'm back! HI! I miss you all!

Signing off

Hey guys,

just signing off before i head on my holiday.

I've come down with a rotten cold in the last 24 hours so feel horrendous. Heading home early from work to sleep. BLAH!

Have a great couple of weeks - will chat to you soon.

SpArKles

I think i'm getting old.

I'm 22 and i feel ancient.

Had a horrendous weekend - saturday night i went out to a club and got very drunk on vodka and lemonades (vodka cruisers.!). Then went to one of those all night kebab places and ate half a massive greasey yucky (yummy when you're drunk) kebabs. I was so buzzed on sugar when i got home that i couldnt sleep! I was bouncing all over the place, fidgety, woke up at about 6am because i could feel my body crashing.

Have i ever told you about my hangover cure? It's very specific.

As soon as you wake up you need to have a glass of orange juice. Then you need KFC (either a works burger or crispy strips), some chips). You also need a red gatorade, a banana smoothie and a bottle of normal sugar filled coke. On this occasion, i actually had some potato mashies too (with that amazing KFC gravy).

Saturday's calories were completely off the chart. I tried having a low-ish calorie day to account for it, but when you spend about 1500 calories on drinks (at least) you're probably not doing too well.

Sunday, well, technically probably fit into my calorie allowance - all i ate was the kfc. It was probably pure fat though, all that oil.

I went to bed at like 8.30pm last night. It's now Monday midday, and i still feel ordinary. I just ate a chicken schnitzel and bacon burger.

I'm 22 and my body doesnt recover like it used to.

I ate 1800 calories on Sunday. 70 grams of fat (CK reccomends 40). I ate 200 grams of carbs. CK reccomends 170.

So, i've probably put on about 10lbs over the weekend.

I did go to the gym saturday morning and had all intentions of weighing myself. I'm very strict about my weighing routine too and will only do it if i've eaten certain things and it's at a certain time. But the bloody scales were broken!!! So i refused to weigh in anywhere else (not that i could, we down own scales at home - thank god). So i guess i'll have to wait for later this week to replicate the normal circumstances.

I'M ON HOLIDAYS IN TWO DAYS!

I'm working monday and tuesday and have the rest of hte week (and next week) off work. We fly out saturday morning. Hooray!

So i wont be around for a couple of weeks guys - am going to be concious about what i eat, but not going to freak out - i'm on holidays afterall. And i doubt it very very much if i'll evne consider logging on here or CK to speak about weightloss.

Will post tomorrow before i leave.

Thanks for all the great comments guys.

SpArKLes

Friday reason

I want my boys friends to think i'm hot

I wanna' go out and all the boys be jealous of my boyfriend, and... i want them to flirt with me! Ooooh that's evil.

Sorry i've been AWOL

I've kind of been a bit distant on here - sorry. I've been posting/recording hard on calorie king (if you want to look me up, username is just SPARKLYSTAR). You can see my food diary etc on there.

I never thought i'd be one to count calories - but it's so easy on there. You just type in the food and the brand, and it comes up with all the nutritional value!

Calorie King reckons i should be around 1500 calories, so thats what i've been doing.

I went to a Body Jam class last night - was great fun. Not 100% sure on how good the workout is, but i had a ball doing it! CK says i burnt 591 calories in a 59 minute class, but i'm not so sure...

Am going to go for a 20 minute run tonight too because i've been lazy this week.

Weighing in tomorrow - don't expect any loss actually. I would be VERY excited if i've lost 700grams (1.5lb) and down to 96kgs (211lbs). I would be excited if i lost 200 (.4lbs) grams and would be down to 96.5kgs (212lbs). I would be meh but not disappointed if i didnt lose anything (213lbs). I havent really been trying this week.

Big weekend in the alcohol stakes again. My boy is playing gridiron tomorrow evening (4pm) so it'll be a big night on the town tomorrow night. I'm going to try to moderate my alcohol intake. But i'll be real - i'll be drunk. And i'm going to have a great night!

So hopefully i wont be too yucky Sunday morning. I'd really like to squeeze in a work out saturday morning before my car gets serviced and also another sometime Sunday (looking unlikely!)

Hope you all have a great weekend,

M

Food eaten yesterday:

• Up & Go (203)
• Light rye sandwich with tasty cheese and roast pork (378)
• lamb leg baked, bok choy, mushrooms, capsicum (312)
• Banana 80
• Chocolate Mousse cake (226)
• Dark chocolate (47)
• Mandarin (54)
• Total: 1348