Seriously!?

After my nice blog about not cheating, what did I do today? I cheated! After work I went to the mall with a friend/co-worker of mine and I got nuggets and fries from Chick-Fil-A. She was getting them and for some reason, it's really hard for me to discuss dieting with someone as thin as she is. It's shameful, almost. So I just went with the flow and cheated. And I feel AWFUL. Does anyone else ever feel that way about people who aren't overweight? This is seriously depressing. I think I'll just go to bed for the evening and hopefully when I wake up tomorrow I'll be more positive.

Getting into the Groove

Wow, yesterday was the first full day I didn't feel like cheating! I rewarded myself for that with a Skinny Cow ice cream sandwich (hence my user name!). Those are delicious if you feel you need a REAL treat. Today is a very busy day at work and I'm hoping I will be distracted from any hunger pains. I have my Lean Cuisine pizza, a banana, and my trusty water. My ankle is finally feeling a lot better so I think I'll go for a walk this evening after work. Thank goodness for boyfriends who don't mind giving foot massages. :) I think I'll go to my parents house (where I weigh in) after work and weigh in again. Hopefully there will be a loss!

Hope you all have a fantastic day!

Afternoon Hunger Pains

Ugh, right now is the time I always feel like I'm starving. I had an apple an hour ago to try and curb it, but it didn't work. Maybe chewing a piece of sugar free gum would help?

Today has been a great day so far, otherwise. My boyfriend made some very sweet gestures today that really touched me. It was definitely a milestone in our relationship. Only 3 more months till our 1 year anniversary and I hope to be at least 20 lbs lighter by then. That would be wonderful. Our birthday are also 3 days apart, so we can celebrate my 50lbs by July goal together, hopefully on a beach somewhere!

Tonight I'm going to try and be extra good for dinner, to make up for the cheating this weekend. Don't quite know what I'll make yet, but I'm thinking some grilled chicken and veggies sound good. If anyone would like to swap recipes, let me know!!

Woo!

So I weighed in on Friday and I was 237.5! Even after my scale disaster, I lost weight. I totally attribute it to cutting sodas out of my life. Today is day 7 since I've had a Diet Coke. It's hard, but apparently worth it! I cheated a bit this weekend - my cousins were in town and one of them is an amazing chef, so it was hard not to! He made this shrimp dish on Saturday that was unbelievable. I tried to be good and only have a few pieces, but dang it was hard! I'm back on the wagon today, though. I'm going to Kohl's after work today to buy this little stair stepper thing my Dad got that is so cool! It's portable and easy for me to use right now while my ankle heals. It's only about $30.00, so I think it's well worth the price.

I hope everyone's weekend went well! Hopefully I'll get some time to blog later today, but Monday's can be a little unpredictable at my job, so we'll see.

Ciao!

Damn..

SO apparently, the scale I weighed myself on when I first started was a bit off. It was about 3 lbs off and my initial starting weight should have been 246, instead of 243. Which brings me down 4 lbs this week instead of the initial 1 I thought it was. I guess that's better, but still a bummer.

Oh Boy..

So my company had Chick Fil A cater lunch today. I'm surrounded by the smell of chicken nuggets, chicken sandwiches, and waffle fries. But I didn't not cheat! I ate my lemon chicken Lean Cuisine like a good girl and treated myself with the 100 calorie pack Chips Ahoy cookies.

But damn, that chicken smells good!

Friday!

Today marks day 5 of my plan. May not seem like a lot, but it's a lot to me. That's 5 days of nothing but water to drink. 5 days of nothing but healthy food (except for my little cheat moment the other day). Today is  the day I normally quit a diet. I stay on it religiously for a week and then give it up. Well not this time! Today I look forward to my Lean Cuisine lunch and apple. I look forward to my grilled chicken salad for dinner. I think it's starting to kick in. Each day I feel less and less like I want to stop at a drive thru on the way home. I actually found a great way to avoid fast food places on the way home from work. I call either my mom, best friend, or boyfriend and talk to them the WHOLE way home. That distracts me from wanting to stop as well as making sure they know I'm not cheating. It helps a lot, especially since about a mile before my house, there is a Wendy's, Burger King, McDonalds, and Taco Bell all at ONE intersection! Talk about making it hard on someone.

I hope everyone has a lovely weekend! Make good choices and relax!

Day 4

So last night when I went home to FINALLY take a shower after getting my cast off (I'll spare you the details - they're gross) I got a really good look at my leg and foot. From having the cast on, my calf muscles obviously shrank and my leg and foot looks like they had lost weight. My foot was slender instead of round and puffy. I wondered if this is what they might look like when I lose a lot of weight. I compared my right and left foot together and they were considerably different in size. It was actually kind of nice to see "what could be".

Today is day 4 of the meal plan and I have to say it's starting to get easier. Day 2 & 3 were hardest for me, food wise. This morning, I looked forward to my oatmeal and banana. For lunch I have some turkey and cheese rollups, an apple, and 1 of those 100 calorie Chips Ahoy snack packs. I realize that I'm not really eating more than 800-900 calories per day, which may not be great, but I feel ok with it for now. Maybe later on when I'm more set in my schedule, I can add more calories. Saturday night will be my first night that I allow myself to have a "free" meal, meaning I can eat what I want. I will try not to go crazy and eat something terrible for me. I have family coming into town, so I'm betting we'll go out to eat that night. Thankfully, my family knows all about my plan, so I know they'll support me and encourage good choices that night.

This morning while I drove to work, I checked myself out in the mirror while at a stop light. I have to say, my face looks a little thinner. I could be completely hallucinating or just convincing myself that it is, but I really think so. I never had too much of a "double chin" problem, but I could always notice a little bit of extra skin under there. Today it looks much slimmer than normal. I haven't had soda in 4 days and I bet that is what is making the most difference. I am a Diet Coke JUNKIE. 4-5 a day, usually. I've had ZERO this week, which is great. The first day was headache city, but I forced myself to drink tons of water that day to offset it. Now, I don't crave it as much. At dinner Saturday, I'll probably get an Iced Tea, if I really want a break from the water.

I hope everyone is doing well! Remember, you all are strong, beautiful women and WE CAN DO THIS!!!

Yay!

I got my cast off! My orthopedic doctor replaced it with this robotic looking walking boot that I have to wear for 4 weeks, but I can take it off at night and even better, take it off to shower! I was so sick of that nasty, itchy, smelly cast. I spoke to him about starting a weight loss plan and he said to avoid any cardio for the next 4 weeks, but that walking and even doing the stairs like I have been is fine. I'm so relieved!

Even though I titled this blog "Yay!", last night was a little rough for me. For some reason, I was still a little depressed about my last blog and I cheated. I stopped at Wendy's on the way home from work and got a burger. Granted, I only ate the meat and not the bread, but I still feel horrible about it. I guess this is the part where I have to accept that I cheated and get back on the horse.

Before & After

I'm always fascinated by the Before & After photos when I read weight loss stories, watch the Biggest Loser, Celebrity Fit Club, etc. They are a great motivation of what can happen when you are motivated and committed to living a healthy life.

So why don't I feel like I could have an "After" story? I try so hard to picture myself as someone who has lost 100 lbs and imagine how I would look and it's hard. It's hard to see myself as someone who will succeed, which in itself, is recipe for disaster. I WANT my after picture. I want to take a picture on my birthday in July and see that I've lost 50 lbs. (My goal from earlier - lose 50 lbs by July 26)

Maybe I'm overthinking things. It's only Day 2 of my diet and I haven't started the exercise portion yet because of my foot. Everyone says the first days are the hardest and they're right. Does anyone else feel this way?