Tomorrow is our 20th wedding anniversary, so we are headed up to the Napa Valley for 3 nights! :) We're staying at a very cool place with our own private cottage & patio! My husband really splurged for this trip and I'm so excited! I'm a little concerned about putting my bathing suit on in public, though....I just bought 2 one piece bathing suits that I love, so I'll feel a bit better than I would in a two piece, anyway. I'm sooooo far away from my goal weight and I'm feeling very uncomfortable with my body, but I'm going to try my best to start behaving...even on our trip! I plan to exercise alot...they have an "exercise barn" lol and boot camp classes, yoga, runs through the vineyard, etc. I'm definitely going to work my ass off to make up for the wine and gourmet food we'll be devouring! I'm gonna try to get a facial in, too. Yep, I'm going to be pampered, spoiled, wined, and dined this week! And I want to work hard and make sure I deserve it. :)
I know I'm going to relax more on this trip because I'm only 35 minutes away in case of emergency and my youngest daughter is in So. Cal. visiting her BFF for 8 days (she left yesterday), so she won't be home to annoy my 18 year old, who will be here to watch the pets and house. Usually when they are both left at home I get a million phone calls that are non emergency, but of course every time the phone rings I panic and think something is wrong, so now the first question out of our mouths is "Is everything ok?" I'm a big worrier, its not a good trait! However, this time I'm going to relax and enjoy this luxurious trip! :) Fat & Happy will be my motto. My husbands motto will be Happy Wife, Happy Life. LOL
God, I feel like absolute crap today! I ate a huge salad with some leftover steak and chicken on it and it filled me WAY up. But now its just sitting in my stomach like a rock and I feel so sick. I think maybe its either these stupid birth control pills or I'm coming down with something. Because 3+ hours after eating I feel like I need to throw up. Sorry for the TMI Salad for lunch two days in a row, not bad! I should feel good! My daughters are asking me to go hiking and I don't even feel up to that. Ugh.
Oh well. I'm happy that my pie chart on CalorieKing has more blue (protein) than anything else. I can't even think about dinner. Thankfully I am just defrosting some meat sauce for spaghetti tonight. Don't feel like cooking. Oh, that reminds me. I've applied to be a food editor for a cooking website/magazine. I'm excited and I hope I get accepted. Its not a paying job, just a volunteer/hobby thing. It might have some fun perks like cooking classes and they might pick up my food blog, etc. I'd like to make some money off my food blog but I just don't have any readers! Its such a different vibe than EP....where I have such great friends!! (even though I'm not being very good at reciprocating lately! :( I'm working on it. )
I ordered a new cowboy hat today. Mine got all wet and is ruined. Its just for laying by the pool. Although, I do wish I had a horse and was a real cowgirl! lol Which reminds me: I promised to take the girls horseback riding. I really better do that!
See? Blogging just keeps my mind off the fact that I feel like crap! :) I'm off to chug some water and do a little house work. Emphasis on "a little".
Oh my frigging gawd my boobs hurt from these new birth control pills!! I'm on my third day. OWWIEEE!! I haven't been on birth control for over 13 years!!! Thank gawd my husband got a vasectomy after our youngest was born, but now I just had to find a way to skip my periods, didn't I? We'll see how this goes. I cannot imagine going through any side effects for very long. And I swear to God if I start gaining more weight, I will definitely stop. I'll go with the Merina IUD.
Speaking of weight. I'm down 1 pound as of yesterday. I am not weighing in until Tuesday. I'm going back to my regular weigh in days. I'm back on track with eating. Yesterday I had:
oatmeal with blueberries (B) (Fruit!! Me!!)
cashews (S)
1 slice of lite havarti cheese & 2 stone wheat crackers, and an orange!! ( I ate an orange! Me!! An orange!!:) (L)
2 stone wheat crackers & 1 slice of lite havarti cheese (S)
I'm starving. I should go eat. I'm thinking an omelet. Then I'm going for a hike/run in the hills with the dogs. Its so nice outside; really should get off the computer! :)
Happy Sunday! Shelley PS edited to add that I had a big ass salad for lunch and went for a nice hike in the hills with the dog and DH! I'm very proud of myself.
So, I came straight home from vacation and weighed myself. I've gained 6 pounds!! I'm half laughing, half crying. And then to make things even worse, I just had to have Taco Bell for lunch!! So, who even knows what that did?! Anyway, yuck. I feel so disgusting. And I'm meeting a former fellow EP blogger for dinner tonight...at an Italian restaurant with lots of tempting food!! I'd rather not be meeting GettinFit (Alicia) for the first time when I'm like 15 pounds over my goal weight!! Ugh. I mean, I'm totally excited to meet her, but I feel so fat and none, NONE of my pants fit!!! I thought my one pair of black pants would fit, but they are too tight! ;( So, I'm wearing a white skirt with an elastic waist. Thats it, seriously, game on. Even tonight I'm going to TRY to watch what I eat. No appetizers, no huge entrees. Eat half and throw the rest away. Period. And tomorrow I will-I repeat-I WILL be going running!!! I can't believe how badly I screwed up this past week!!!!! Its almost like I just gave myself permission to do it!! Well, I did! I decided that I wasn't gonna worry about it...and now look what I've done. My clothes don't fit me. I'm so screwed. I'm going to be blogging and counting calories until I get to my goal weight. Period.
Oh, speaking of periods! lol I got my birth control pills in the mail today....on the last day of my period, lucky me. Yea, it sucked to be on my period for my beach vacation. :( I'm going to So. Cal. in about 5 weeks, so I damned well better be at my goal by then. Period!!! Wish me luck, cuz I need it!
Hello girls. I'm currently on vacation.....a beach vacation! I've decided to just embrace my body for what it is. What else can I do? I haven't bared my bod on the beach yet, but I've been lounging on our deck. I wanted to head down to the beach today, but its still overcast at noon. Hoping tomorrow is better since we only have 3 days left (including today!). We are only an hour away from our house and still even in the same county! lol With DH's pain, its about as far as he could drive without being completely miserable. Anyway, its so convenient.....yesterday I drove my daughters friend home and stopped by my house to do a few things, like feed the cats and give them lots of love! I dropped a few things off and picked a few things up and weighed myself! lol No loss, no gain...after 3 days of vacation, including a big BBQ/Party....I managed to maintain.
I promised myself I'd run on the beach every single morning, but so far all I've managed is to walk the dogs on the beach. So, I'd like to get at least one beach run in and also some alone time to sit and meditate on the beach. This town (Stinson Beach) is sooooo tiny! Theres only 3 restaurants, which is fine cuz we've been cooking a lot. (and eating alot!!). We went to the Sand Dollar Restaurant the first night we got in and I had fish and chips. I usually have steak. Anyway, we're doing a good job of eating all the food we brought up for the BBQ, but I'm getting tired of leftovers, so I kinda want to go out to lunch or dinner today/tonight. I'm craving a burger. I got lots of "exercise" yesterday between running around my house and then coming back to the beach house and doing laundry. The laundry room is down the front stairs in the garage and I must've gone up and down the front walk about 25 times checking on laundry. I'm a very good housekeeper when I'm on vacation. The maids love me!
Anyway, just thought I'd pop in and write an update. When I get home on Friday, Its game on and I'm going to get this extra weight off. I'm not in a bad place with it...I mean, I'm not doing anything about it, so why complain? I'm being honest: I'm eating about 2,000 calories/day and the only exercise I'm getting is housework and dog walks. I'm on vacation and I'm having a good time. I'm ok with that.
I need to blog more. Its so helpful to write my thoughts down.
I've gained 6 pounds in a week!! yikes!! However, I weighed myself on Friday and then again this morning.......I ate like a pig all Sat, Sun, & Mon, and half expected to have gained another 5 pounds and was surprised to see that I hadn't gained anything over the holiday weekend, so I'm not as bummed as I expected to be. 145 isn't the end of the world. Its about as high as I like to go without getting really freaked out though....its my "cap". So its time for damage control!!! :)
Those of you who know me so well, know that I crave and adore my alone time at home. The kids are home from school and have no social life....seems I'm their best friend these days! lol Which is fine, but I need some space. My oldest daughter, in particular, has been especially sweet to me and we're doing some good bonding. You also may remember that my ever present husband has been working from home since.....?.......Early May? I have to check, but its been a long, long, long, time and I'm happy to report that he finally got his epidural cortisone shot!! FINALLY!!! That was last Wednesday. It didn't work instantly because his pain level was soooooo high....L5 is high as it goes (whatever that is) and so it took about 3 days to start working. He is still in quite a bit of pain. He went from a 10 to a 5 on the pain scale. I have a point, I promise! ;)
He went to work today!!!!!!!!
And guess what else? We went to my SIL & BIL's for a post 4th of July BBQ yesterday and we left the kids there!!!! I knew this day was coming since last week and boy have I been looking forward to it!! I am all alone in my house today for the first time in a few months!! I'm so happy. I can just sit and think and hear myself thinking and not be constantly interrupted!! Its so quiet. Its awesome. I'm in heaven!
So, the girls are staying a few days at their aunt & uncles house bonding with their cousins, who are boys in their early 20's. I told them they are staying til tomorrow at the earliest, and preferably until Friday. :) DH will go to work again on Thursday, so I'm hoping to have the day to myself again, but I think the girls will be begging to come home by then. I might just drive over there Thursday afternoon (1 hour away) and spend the night and hang out with my favorite SIL and then we'll all come home on Friday.
Random: I need a facial.
Happiest I've been in a very long time, people! I wish I didn't have to run to the store, but we're out of milk and catfood. Or cat biscuits for you Brits! ;) The house is relatively clean because I spent yesterday morning tidying up so that we didn't come home to a messy house last night. I have a few things to do, but otherwise, I'm just gonna screw around on the computer, read a magazine by the pool, and do whatever I want to do and not worry about anyone else for a change. I'm eating super healthy today and might go for a run later. I got to get these stupid pounds off and then some.
I turn 44 in just about 3 months and 44 is my lucky/favorite number and so I've decided that I'd like to be 124 by my b-day. (I have a thing for even numbers, what can I say?) Even if its only for the day and I indulge and gain it all back by the day after! lol I'm running 2 half marathons within a month after my b-day, so I'll be training and who knows, maybe I actually will be able to shed 20 pounds by then???
Ok, I'm done ranting and raving. Raving, mostly! This is a happy post from the Shelley who is back to her old self, even if her pants are all too tight!
Wow, haven't been in the 130's in a long time! Happy to be back, if only just barely.
Reading magazines in bed then going to watch our last tennis match of the season. I've had 2 people inquire why I've not signed up for next season....made me feel wanted, so I'm joining. Looking forward to seeing everyone at the club today. My husbands team will be there, too, for their end of season party. Should be a fun time. What to wear?!!??!! Guess I better do some laundry, too.
One more week of waiting for my husbands procedure then hopefully our lives can resume. I'm so tired of it. He's in so much pain and its really frustrating. I'm beyond being patient..I'm repressing all of my emotions to the point where I'm bound to explode soon. He's constantly under foot. Yesterday I was going to go pick up my prescription (more on that in a minute!) and he says he needs to pick up his, too, so why don't we go together. Aren't we together enough? 24/7 for the past um.....9 weeks? Something like that. We can't plan our vacation until he is better and by that time I won't even want to be on vacation with him cuz i'm already sick of him. lol I feel like we're constantly butting heads. I need some time to myself. I can't even think straight. Honestly.
I have to get a mammogram in half an hour. I had my ob/gyn checkup on Friday and I asked about the "no period" pill, but he put me on birth control instead. Well, actually, he said he was going to call in the prescription, but when I finally got to the pharmacy it turns out he never did it. So I went to email him, but I got an "out of office till 6/29" message. Great. I started my period yesterday, so I guess I'll have to start the pills next week. I'm excited about the prospect of not having a period for a few months!!! Alternatively, he said I'd be a good candidate for the Mirena IUD. Never heard of it before, but its supposed to decrease my period days from 5 to 1 or 2. I think I'll try the birth control pills first.
I saved a lost dog today. I heard a bunch of honking outside and saw a loose dog so I ran out to help. This really nice lady (Shannon) had pulled over and was trying to get a drivers attention to tell her that her dog jumped out of the back of her truck. The lady didn't even notice and kept driving! Well, I had to chase the poor scared doggie down the block a little bit, but I was finally able to corner her and catch her. We put her in Shannons car and called 3 different numbers that were thankfully on her collar. Turns out the driver of the truck was the dog walker!! I was mortified!! However, it turns out that the truck was a covered truck and the screen on the window had been pushed out by the one of the dogs without her realizing it. She felt terrible and of course she and the owners, Monte & Sofia were extremely grateful that we caught the dog. Poor Rosie is only 6 months old and what a sweet dog!!! I left her with Shannon since we have 2 dogs and I was on my way to the movies.
We somehow made it to the show....we saw Toy Story 3. Cute. I did get a little teary eyed.
Thats all I got for now. I gotta run to get my boobs smashed. ;)
Today my baby is 17. Tomorrow she will be an adult!! 18!! Now, thankfully, she isn't the type that will run out and buy cigarettes and get a tattoo!!! I survived her Senior year, graduation was a lot of fun, and she loved her gifts. I bought her a pretty white sundress to wear to the ceremony, we gave her some cash, and the big gift was that we bought her a new bed. I expected it to be an ordeal, but we found the mattresses in a timely manner and they will be delivered on Friday. Who knew how expensive mattresses are these days? Not me! Ours is like 15 years old! We just need to find a headboard now. She was really excited when we told her she was getting a new bed. Now that she's staying home 2 more years, we thought she deserved it. Her bed is almost 12 years old. She's going from a twin to a full! :) I want a new bed now!!!
So, I have no idea what the plan is for tomorrow. She finally told me that she wants to go out to dinner, so we're going to one of our favorite Italian places..
Fathers Day. No clue. Sending a card to my dad, will probably call him. I called him last week and he was mean. Whatever.
Running has been non-existent. Actually, I don't think I've done any exercise other than walking the dogs. My weight is still 141. At least as of the last time I weighed in a few days ago. I really wat to lose 10 pounds. The only thing I'm doing right is eating well. I've been eating Kashi blueberry cereal every morning. I hope I'll start running again this week. I have to do something!!
DH is the same. Except he's on morphine now. If his blood pressure is down, then he will get his epidural on Friday. If its high, then he gets it on June 30th. I feel as if my life is on hold until that happens. I can't plan a vacation cuz he can't be in the car for 8+ hours. Even the 1:15 flight to/from San Diego was excruciating. And I'm trying soooo hard to be patient about him not being able to do anything. I can't really ask him to do much, but it grates my nerves. He's in so much pain, so I'm trying my best to ignore everything. He's been working from home for 2 months now!!! I'm so frustrated. Beyond frustrated. Stir crazy.
Ok, I need to do some housework before I take DD12 to the doctor. My house is a disaster area. I've really let the housework slide lately. Depression sucks.
Wow its been a long time since I've blogged. I've been busy and in a funk. I just got home from shopping and lunch at the Cheesecake Factory with DH & DD12. I had the Tuna Tetaki Salad and no cheesecake. My day started out terrible with my daughter waking me up with news that she was leaving to get ready for Prom with her friends at 9:30am. WTF? Its not like I've been waiting her entire life for her Senior Prom. (I have) I thought she was going to get ready here at home and I was looking forward to it. Whatever. I guess I should be grateful that I'm "allowed" to go take pictures at 4:00. And she isn't even getting home until 3:00. I'm not happy. Nothing in my life is going as planned these days. Between this, her "deciding" to stay home 2 more years and go to community college, and my husband being on sick leave for 6 weeks now, I'm about ready to slit my wrists. Not really, but I'm having a breakdown. And I still have graduation, her birthday, and her graduation party to stress out over. Throw in the fact that I'm going to San Diego next weekend for 3 days....and well, I guess you can just say that my life is overwhelming me. I'm looking forward to San Diego, though. I can't wait to see Donna and get this half marathon over and done with!! I've been good about running, my knees are killing me, but I just ice them and stretch. Its all I can do. Other than not run at all, which is going to have to be a serious consideration very soon.
I'm eating very well and am on track with just maintaining 140. Not the 135 I hoped for, but it could be worse, so I'm not really complaining. I went to see Sex and the City with a friend last night and she kept telling me how small, thin, and fit I looked. lol I was like, I'm really not...I'm mushy!!
Ok, well, its 3:30, so I better get running...time for prom pictures.
