back at it!

back at it again! ... hope this won't be like this all my life! :-( 

double oops

ok , well my 1 week off turnt in to 2 and a bit lol ... 

43 days on CS ... 2lb lost :-)

another 2lb off today :-) ... SOOOO VERY HAPPY about that coz its taken me in to the 14's ... 14st13lb ... plus im not feeling very well so really happy about it x

day 36 CS ... weigh in day 4lb lost :-)

so i know i haven't been a cheerful blogger , infact i haven't blogged as much as i would like to have but anyway ... on day 36 of Celebrity Slim and i have lost another 4lb :-) ... this im really happy with OBVIOUSLY LOL ... still 2st10lb to go :-) 

pigged out ... oops :-/

so as i have swapped my main meal for my lunch instead of my dinner , i have just stood in the kitchen whilst waiting for my food to cook and eaten 3 packets of crisps and 2 coconut atkins bars ... grrrrrrrr why did i do that ... i didn't bother eating the cooked food in the end ... i lost control and didn't even breath, seriously i stuffed my face  

different outlook

i feel a little better than i did yesterday, i decided to get the treadmill going , only did 10mins as it killed me but will keep that up now ive started ... hopefully increase that time amount next week ... 

hopefully it won't feel to bad come this evening when im feeding my children and i don't have my dinner either ... 

feeling :-(

felt well sad / down in the dumps today  ... went to town with my daughters to see if i could find some trousers ... i wear leggings every single day and i just thought maybe i could find something that fitted me and as im 6ft something that was long enough , well blow me down the only shop that i knew stocked tall range of clothing in my town are no longer selling it in the store ... i have not been to town for a long time , the last time i went was christmas and that was to buy other people presents... i tried on a few pairs of standard length trousers to kinda get a feel for what size i am , (i don't really know what clothing size i am) , i tried on 18, 20 and 22 , ... size 20-22 feels baggy on me but 18's feel to tight round my hip area ... 

im so sad that i am this size , and that i feel uncomfortable like this ... i have no interest in clothing what so ever, like i said i wear leggings every single day and tops that my mum gave me from when she was big , but even they are to small ... i don't want to soumd so negative but i really do feel awful and need to express myself somewhere as i don't want to upset my partner and children by crying in front of them 

i really don't want to give up on this diet but i feel so sh*t that i have let myself get like this and that i have to now work really hard to get rid of it  

im sooooo tired :-(

picking at food grrrr

gosh ive just made my children roast potato's , and i HAD to have a little nibble , i just had to , only a ickle tiny weeny bit but enough to make me feel crazy guilty! ... i have obviously cooked for my children these past 4 weeks as always but these potato's just smelt sooooo good lol ... oops, nevermind 

day 27 celebrity slim

really don't know what to blog about ... still sticking to the diet , trying to drink more water ... ive been pretty good , i did have an extra snack yesterday , not coz i was hungry but just fancied something ... so i had an atkins bar (coconut) yum ... running out of ideas to make dinner interesting :-( ... think ill look online in a bit ... xxx

day 26 Celebrity Slim

have been trying the meal replacement bars , biggest loser bars ... im not so keen on them but they are easy to just grab , i have a few of them so will use them lol