I did NOT want to go to the gym this morning. I know, you are stunned. I must have a fever or something, anyway... I set my alarm, I got up, I drank coffee (lest I kill someone at the gym. I don't really think that is part of a healthy lifestyle) AND I WENT TO THE DAMN GYM! HA!
Today's Workout: (I need to report a workout because, well, I actually did one today! )
Treadmill: 38 minutes 5 minute walking warm up (0.33 mi) 33 minute RUN, yes I said RUN!!! (3 miles @ 11:00 min/mile pace)
Strength Training Class: 60 minutes Regular demonic sprite was out of town, had substitute devilkin that wasn't quite as evil although she gave it her best shot!
Knee
It hurt, but it never got worse like it usually does and I was able to run with it. I don't know how far I can run, but I am going to inch my miles up slowly and see how it goes. However, I was so inspired that I have...
OFFICIALLY REGISTERED FOR THE NAPA VALLEY MARATHON!
Breakfast coffee only (I was feeling pretty crummy this morning)
Snack 2 handfuls of pink M&M's (they were pink and their purchase supported breast cancer research, so they can't be bad for you, right?)
Lunch JC Chili Con Carne (part of the old JC stuff I am trying to work through, I think I will throw the other can away. It is the gift that keeps on giving, if you know what I mean)
Snack piece of wheat bread w/ margarine
Dinner (date night) small bean and cheese burrito (exceedingly small, it was as if Jenny Craig herself called the damn restaurant!) 6 tortilla chips
Not too much of a shocker. I was up 1.2 pounds at weigh in this morning. I haven't been exercising using the "resting my knee" excuse when there were non-knee jarring exercises I could be doing, I have let a few things slip in terms of eating , but not terrible, and TOM has arrived with a vengeance. So I am not freaking out about the gain.
Would I have like to lost1.4 and hit goal INSTEAD of gaining 1.2 and making goal all but impossible for next week? Sure, but like we have all said a hundred times this is about the lifestyle change not the scale, and I am pretty happy with how I conducted myself this Thanksgiving.
Thoughts on the Food log
I'll be back later to post food for the day. I have to say that, even though I know the food posts are boring as hell, the increased accountability has helped keep me from totally going crazy with the food like I did last winter (and every winter for years!), so I think I am going to keep it up until I feel like I don't need it anymore.
I do not want this to be about deprivation and it really hasn't been, but I get into denial very quickly about how much I am eating and tend to have "selective memory syndrome" when I don't have accountability.
I post all my food good or bad. Lying about it hurts only me and not wanting to post it keeps me from choosing foods that I only "want" to fill the hole instead of because it tastes good and I want to enjoy it. It is ok for me to have food I love to enjoy it. It is not ok for me to use it as a crutch to feel better in the instant and then beat myself up over it later.
I am so glad that I found this site and made it part of journey to a healthy lifestyle. I was feeling pretty down about the family thing yesterday, but your amazingly thoughtful comments and some email conversations I have had really helped me put it in perspective. It also helped keep me from using it as an excuse to binge today. I had MAJOR cramps and just felt icky and I wanted to just eat and eat, but I kept it in check thanks to you guys!
Exercise
none. I had to work at my old job today and then major cramps.
Food
Breakfast JC French Toast coffee
Snack Grande nonfat sugar-free vanilla latte 1/4 c. cottage cheese 1 box thing of raspberries (about 1/2 cup I think)
Lunch JC Mac and Cheese
Snack about 3 oz. of Turkey from the leftovers (cold, no gravy)
Dinner salad w/ JC dressing and croutons (low fat croutons) JC Meatloaf (Not my fav, but I am trying to get rid of old meals that have been in the freezer)
Not one compliment. Not one, "wow, you are looking good." or "you've lost weight." NOTHING!
My family has not seen me since I was down about 12 pounds I am now down 22 (maybe less, it has not been a great food/exercise week.) However, I have lost a considerable amount more AND I have never kept weight I lost off this long before.
Now before you go and give them the "they love you just as you are" benefit of the doubt, these are the same people that gave me a membership to Nutrisystem for my 17th birthday ( I didn't ask for it, they just surprised me! I believe my response was "it is that bad, huh?" I was pretty embarrassed)
WTF??
Also I did not get a single, 'hey, great job on the marathon" or even "how was the marathon?" The only comment about the marathon or triathlon was , "You know you have to be careful with those marathons and triathlons and stuff. Everyone that I know that did those things got real fat after they stopped because they were used to being able to eat all the time."
Nice. Thanks.
Whatever.
Breakfast JC French toast plus banana coffee
snack Grande non-fat sugar-free vanilla latte
Thanksgiving Dinner (served at 1:00 pm southern style) Turkey (about 6 oz) mashed potatoes w/ gravy (about 1/2 cup total) Heirloom tomato salad (had olive oil dressing on it)
Dessert small piece choc. cake (ate about 3/4 of it. too rich and had pumpkin filling. Not a huge fan of pumpkin, but Mom baked it from scratch so I had to try some) coffee
I am here to report I have had pie in my house for over 14 hours and have not eaten any of it. Of course, my mother would KILL me for bring a pie that had been sliced into, but I will still take it as a win. I was never opposed to replacing the original pie I intended to bring (and ate by myself) with a new pie I bought on my way to her house!
Did I ever tell you all about the year I had to replace the candy in my husband's Easter basket five times because I kept eating it?! I know now to buy the stuff the night before!
Anyhoo..
Happy Thanksgiving everyone! And to those that don't celebrate this holiday, just Happy Day!
I got to pick up my 20 "new to me" microscopes from State today! I was begging for money at Back to School Night and a parent actually said "ok, how much do you need?" I almost fell out of my chair. She gave me a check for $500 to buy refurbished microscopes that State was selling for $50 a piece (HELL of a deal. They are old, but have amazing optics!)
I went to the microscope guy at State and told him I got a donation to buy some microscopes and he asked how many I wanted, I said, " is there any way I can get 20 for $500?" He said, "let me ask" and Voila! I have 20 new microscopes for my kids at a STEAL! He even serviced them all for me for free, threw in a bunch of extra bulbs AND a binocular scope for me! I could barely contain myself!
Then...
I went up to see my master professor to see if there was any word on the Raccoon study I was hoping to get in on as the RVT. This would also give me a project to write a thesis for my MS and YES it was approved by the FDA and I am going to be a part of it! Happy Dance!
All in all a pretty darn good day!
Exercise
none. I guess I am taking this "rest your knee" thing to heart. I could have swam, but... I didn't.
Food
Breakfast JC French Toast coffee
Snack Grande nonfat sugar-free vanilla latte
Lunch JC Cheesy Enchilada 1/4 c. cottage cheese
Snack JC S'mores bar coffee
Dinner Sushi Golden Bell Roll (I think we are talking full blown addiction at this point) Tamago
1. I am grateful I am clean and sober. Without this, nothing else that is good in my life, or my life itself for that matter, would be possible.
2. I am grateful for my relationship with my husband. We met in a meeting almost 17 years ago and have been together ever since. He has been with me through the worst of the worst times and stuck by me when everyone else had given up. He gave me tough love when I needed it and softness when I needed it. He makes me feel safe and loved. I can not thank him enough for that. I never thought I was capable of the life we have built together. Feet first baby! (We have a joke. “No one leaves this relationship unless it is feet first!” We have a morbid sense of humor in my house)
3. I am grateful for my family of origin. I lost them once. Not lost, that sounds like I was a victim, I wasn’t. I threw them away once. I will never let that happen again.
4. I am grateful for my education and the opportunities it has afforded me. My father was the first in our family to go to college. He worked three jobs to make it happen. He had to attend alternate quarters to work enough to save for the next quarter and then he continued to work while he was in school. When I came along he was determined that I would not struggle as he did. I don’t remember a time when I thought I wasn’t going to college. When the time came I was an immature, emotionally screwed up girl and I ended up dropping out (let’s be honest, I dropped out before they kicked me out.) I squandered his money and shattered his dreams. When I got my shit together I was too embarrassed to even attempt school again. I thought I was too stupid, lazy, unmotivated, etc. My then boyfriend, now husband, encouraged me to go back. He couldn’t see me waiting tables and cocktailing for the rest of my life. I started back at community college (it was my dime this time and I had to work full time to make it happen) and discovered that I actually liked learning. I kept at it and eventually graduated with my BS in biology. I was the second person in our family (and last so far) to graduate from college. I have since earned my registered veterinary technician (RVT) license, a single subject teaching credential in biology and chemistry, MA in Administration and Educational Leadership, a preliminary administrative credential, and am currently working on a second masters degree (MS) in Microbiology and Molecular Biology.
5. I am grateful for my furry, feathered and scaly family. I have a large animal family that gives me joy everyday and reminds me not to take life so damn seriously!
Ever the optimist I will begin with the good news! (read: I want to put off admitting to the horrifying amount of food I ate today)
Knee Doctor
I went today and it was so nice to go to a doctor that isn't standing by the door with their hand on the handle, chomping at the bit to get to their next patient, before they even say hello to you. He examined my knee, asked what I had done so far and never once acted like I was an idiot for coming in or waiting so long to come in. Plus he was HOT, another big plus in my book.
He took an x-ray of my knee and said he did not see evidence of a stress fracture (Yikes! Hadn't considered that one) but he couldn't rule it out. He gave me a cortisone shot in my knee (He mentioned it, I asked for it. Surprisingly not painful due to and anesthetic spray he used. It ached for a little while later, but all in all not bad) He prescribed physical therapy and gave me several physical therapists that he recommended to run by my oh-so-caring-and-competent primary care physician to see if I can get insurance to pay for it. He told me to give the knee a break from the treamill for 24-48 hours and then try a short run on Saturday. So I will do that.
I feel good that I have tried this new avenue, hopefully it will be what I need to be able to get running and training for Napa! He said if it isn't any better in 2 weeks that I need to come back to see him and he will insist on an MRI to see if there is a fracture (I really don't think so).
Anyway that is the update!
Part II of the Good News
As of 12 noon today, NO CHERUBS of either the high school or college variety for 5 days!! Love them to death, but to ensure that it is not LITERALLY to death I need a break from them sometimes!
College cherubs have a lab report due on Monday and their final lab practical on Wednesday so they are all emailing like mad, but I don't have to go and teach them. Yipee!
The high school cherubs are as glad to get rid of me for 5 days as I am to get rid of them, so we are all good! I doubt there will be any phone calls or emails from them! Another Yipee!
Food (*sigh* It is time to face the music)
Breakfast (1) English muffin coffee (2) JC French Toast ( I know, you are shocked!) more coffee
Snack apple more coffee 1 inch square of Sees chocolate bar (college reference letter bribes are starting to trickle in, must pawn these off on other teenagers! And yes, the remainder of this bar is stashed in my desk.)
Lunch 1 slice cheese pizza (the victory party for my class winning the Second Harvest Canned Food Drive. I am ridiculously competitive about this and i win every year! I had stiff competition this year, but the kids stepped it up and we won! Boo Yah!) And even more coffee (the shocking revelations they just keep a comin')
Snack Sushi (ok, not really a snack, but was eaten in lieu of a snack, so... I know, lame!) Golden Bell Roll Tamago Diet Coke (hey, at least it wasn't coffee!)
Dinner JC Cheesy Enchilada
Snack (because there just hasn't been enough!) JC Lemon cake Yogurt w/ 1/4 c. soy flax cereal
I knew I didn't like the damn things for a reason. Yesterday, I was eating a bowl of salad with cherry tomatoes and when I bit into one it squirted its tomato guts all over my keyboard. Now I have to hit the "d" key really hard to get it to type. You don't realize how many "d's" you use until the damn key doesn't work. (I seriously almost left it they way it was without fixing all the 'd's' but it didn't make any sense.) Arghhhh!
Knee, the returning saga
I am finally going to the orthopedic doctor tomorrow to find out what I can do about my knee. It has been a month since the marathon and I still can't run. I need some help. I have decided to pay for it myself since my primary care physician's office is incompetent. I do not throw that word around lightly, but they have had a changing of the guard and I can not seem to get anything to work from them, so that is what they are, incompetent. I am worried, but at least I will know something tomorrow
Food
Breakfast (1) English muffin coffee (2) JC French Toast plus banana coffee
Snack apple small donut (See, how I said small as if that somehow negated the "donut" part)
Lunch JC Cheesy Enchilada
Snack JC S'mores bar Powerbar (during class, long time until dinner)
Dinner JC Salisbury Steak salad w/ JC dressing and croutons
