NSV

non scale victory (since i dont count what the scale says unless its at my meeting)

Worked out 3 days in a row! im aiming for 6 this week! but still im pretty proud of myself. all three workouts have been no less than 40 mins. 2 were 1 hour...and I can totally see some differences from before i started working out 2 weeks ago.

*victory booty shake*

that is all....go about business as usual :)

4 sticks of butter

Well...yesterday was a trying day for me. It was the anniversary of my father's death, i had gotten my period (not to mention the moodiness, bloating and cramps that accompany it), and I had an aggrivating work day. I was SOOOO close to not going to my meeting, and was stressing about having lost any weight, especially because of the bloating, and water retaining and all that fun stuff. I turn onto the interstate and .... traffic jam...I was almost positive I wouldn't make it.

However, I did get there, with a few minutes to spare. I was down 1 lb exactly...or as they like to put it... thats 4 sticks of butter. hehe. So...in the end...i am happy i returned...and happy that i lost weight...a pound lost is one less there to lose. I learned a lesson from all this too. when starving when i first get home...scarf down salad...not a HUNK of mozzarella....especially the night before you weigh in. adding my lactose intolerance, and the um...traffic jam my period and the cheese caused. I am pretty sure i know WHY i didnt lose anything else.

Today was a much better day both at work, and after. I did great foodwise at work, tracked everything today, and committed myself to 45 mins of working out. I am thoroughly sore hehe but it feels good knowing i kept to my committment, and have another successful day under my belt. My... ever shrinking belt that is ;)

One week almost down

I just got back from the gym tonight. worked out just about 1 hour...im totallllly exhausted lol. And robert and me are going to go swimming tonight, so i want to get some laps in as well.

I have been sticking to my plan, although i have dipped into some of my activity points, and my weekly allowance points. I think I am doing good, though I am nervous to weigh in tomorrow. I have been checking on my scale, but think i am going to have my husband start hiding it again. (yes...on my old diet, i would make him hide it so i didnt obsess over it hehe). I have worked out, friday, saturday, very little on sunday, and not really so much yesterday, but definitely tonight.

I am excited to report that my mom IS going to be starting very soon on WW as well as my friend andrea, so i have some buddies to help motivate and keep me motivated as well. :) . well i need to go pick up robert from work, sooo later :)

From the moment I wake up before I put on my make up

soo..i had my breakfast...then a snack at about 10:45, but my tummy is totally growling right now. I drank more water but it is totally not helping hehe...ive got about another hour til lunch, but i may wander to the break room and grab a couple of my baby carrots i brought in.

Otherwise im doing really well today, and feeling a bit more peppy. I got up, had my clothes already laid out as well as my food for the day already put in my lunch box, so I was all ready to go. did my hair and my makeup and I must say im feeling pretty good. Its amazing how when you put a little bit of time into getting ready, maybe a lil eyeliner and eyeshadow...it can make all the difference in the world on how you see yourself. I am perfectly fine with showing my face without make up, but I think just the act of putting extra effort into getting ready to head out for the day is what makes the difference...not the actual make up. I have been reading some of the little short essays in "Shot in the arm". I am definitely enjoying them and they do make you think, and they keep you motivated. I know I wont always feel as "Full steam ahead!" as I currently do, but I think stuff like that book totally helps. Also, one of my best friends even told me once I get down to sizes she has already gotten down past, she is giving me her old clothes...and she has some CUTE clothes! hehe so some more incentive.

Well thats it...and it looks like my water just kicked in and told my tummy to chill out for a bit longer. I guess distracting myself with blogging for a little bit also helped.

"Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right"...

and as us Obama supporters like to say.

YES WE CAN!

Off to an interesting start

So i went to my first weight watcher meeting last night, paid for a monthly pass and got the deluxe starter kit. It was good, though i felt slightly overwhelmed...i guess just restarting something made me feel like that. Then i felt sick...like i was getting sick, later that night. took nyquil, went to bed...got up...felt just as horrible.

Well..i mustered up enough energy to drive my hubby to work and run to the superwalmart to stock up. 93 bucks later i have a ton of groceries and am on my way. Im on the flex plan, and I get 28 Pts... I have my first goal of losing 10% of my weight...so im changing my little goal on here to 22 lbs less for now. and adjusting my starting weight to what they had.

YAYYYYY i feel like...well crap cuz im sick..but i feel like im on my way to something better and it feels good. I have written down my foods so far today in my food journal and entered it on my ww etools thing as well. I feel alot more in control :). Just thought I would share...now im probably going to go lie down.. later!

ummph

blah i think im getting pms. I have felt lousy today. I was hoping to catch a meeting today...but i realized the one thats the latest, is a spanish meeting on tuesday. I am going to try and go tomorrow though, so thursday when i get paid, i can already have my grocery list ready for after work. I am so anxious to start on Weight watchers. I just want to start working in the right direction again. Today wasnt too great...between bad food, not horrible, but just...not great and a lil too much..and feeling really out of it and sick..i cannot wait for tomorrow. another day, and a new one. anyways. ta ta. Looking foward to a great day tomorrow.

Whys and whats

I am a big believer in the power of positive thinking. I also like to sorta get myself ramped up to start something new. Not to be over enthusiastic, just to go in with more positive thinking and determination I suppose. So this post is why I want to lose weight, as well as what I want to do/have after i lose weight.

My Why's

• To be healthier, since my family has a history of diabetes and heart problems. Also my mother has joint problems, and I don't want to develop those due to weight.
• two words: sexy lingerie. I am a newlywed and I rarely feel sexy since i have put on more and more weight.
• one word: bikini. havent worn one since pre-puberty really.
• be more athletic. While I am working on that now, there is NO way i could do a 5k in my physical condition.
• I like shopping, I hate it though currently because I can never find stuff I like on me anymore...
• speaking of clothes...i have tons...that are currently to tight at the moment. to me joining weight watchers will outweigh the cost of a new larger wardrobe (most larger clothing stores cost WAYYY more than "regular" sizes).

What I am doing during/after losing weight

• Buying a cruiser bicycle, complete with a cute basket. I am located quite close to alot of stuff, like the grocery store, the pet store, sports authority, starbucks...etc etc. etc. as well as some family and the community college. (this one will probably be after i lose my first 20 or so, maybe my under 200 reward)
• I am going back into nursing school. this is actually more of a why, since i want to be healthy before i actually start working as a nurse, since ill be on my feet for 12 hour shifts :).
• Boob job....no no no no NOT bigger! Smaller! It did occur to me that my boobs lose weight too...but being that I have had quite a rack since ohhhh FOURTH GRADE...I think they could use a "pick me up". (this is obviously going to be once im at goal and maintaining, and probably most expensive)
• A Wii and  a Wii fit...i just keep hearing great things about it. (im thinking this will be a goal to try and get by christmas, even if its just for remaining on my program and working out)
• Tennis racket...and a tennis skirt (my friend and i got tennis balls becuase they were pink and my apt complex has 2 tennis courts, we want to start playing...but want to look hot in those lil tennis skirts lol...so this will be whenever i can wear one of those skirts proudly hehe)
• hair highlights...becuase they will look great framing a skinnier face :). (not sure when to put this goal... this depends on how good work is going too hehe)

wow...big lists...hehe... and why not to finish it off... things I already have that I am happy about, and people that I have that love me for me and are always encouraging

• Of course I have God to thank, since he has always answered my prayers and through out my life's ups and downs, he has eventually taught me that there is really a reason for every situation you run into in your life.  I could go on about this...but I really do feel that if i was in trouble, or sorta scraping by and prayed about it, things happened that turned it around, or gave me an avenue to turn it around myself. (for example, my new job and nearly 3 dollar per hour increase in pay...not to mention the opportunity to make WEEKLY bonuses...which is definitely going to help me pay for doing weight watchers...something i previously couldnt afford).
• My husband...he is just....amazing. I am not putting him on a pedestal, but he has ALWAYS believed in me. If he knew I wanted to achieve something, he has always been their encouraging me, even if I got to the point of wanting to give up. He balances me out as well. I worry about wayyyy too much (ehem gee...i wonder if that affects my eating haha). He always tells me things will work out...and amazingly...he is always right lol.
• My aunt... she is very ill and it is largely due to her weight. She has always approached my weight issue in a much more nurturing and caring way than my mother (whom i love very much, but the road to hell is paved with good intentions lol) and does not want to see me become sick when i can prevent it. I owe this to myself, but also to her, as she has spent lots of money previously, trying to keep me active and help me lose weight. She is an amazing woman.
• I am thankful for the wonderful life I have. It truly is wonderful. My husband and I had a great wedding this past april and the memories of it will always be there. We planned it ourselves and everything, down to all the music, was completely unique to us. We have a nice little apartment, and 2 cute kitties as well as a bouncy little ferret. We have what we need, as well as some nice little extras.
• I am thankful for waking up each day in our comfy bed, next to my handsome husband, he is sooo easy to cuddle up with, sometimes its hard to pry myself away and get ready for work. Thats why I LOVE weekends hehe.
• I am thankful that I do love myself, and my body...despite it being "fluffier" than I'd like currently.

Alright...wow...thats really alot...haha but I am ending my night on a very positive note...so thats good. I think i need some sort of positive thing for the end of each blog....hmm how about

-whether you think you can, or think you can't, you are right

-be not afraid of going slowly, be afraid of only standing still

Back at the point I never wanted to see again.

Over 2 years ago, I successfully lost about 50 lbs. in 6 months no less! I felt awesome, and was the smallest i had been in a very long time. Well.. I am right smack dab where i started at. While I am generally a more happy person than I used to be, and have a wonderful, supportive and loving husband, I am a little sad that I even let myself get back to this point.

But ya know what? I am not going to stay here because I am doing something about it. Knowing myself, I have always succeeded better when i had other people taking the same road as me, so if i tripped up they would be like, nu-uh, lets keep on going. Previously I did medifast with  2 of my family members, and it was going great, but then they stopped...then i stopped. Sooo..this is why I am going to join weight watchers, and attend weekly meetings. Another great thing about them is that you can go to meetings for free, after you meet your goal...something I think would help, since weight loss isnt just about loss, but maintainence too. Thursday I get paid, so I am planning to attend my first meeting then, after work. Ill probably blog before then, but if not, I will be back with a full report later :).