| Height: | 170.2cm |
| Start weight: | 230.00lb |
| Current weight: | 190.50lb |
| Goal weight: | 150.00lb |
| Lost to date: | 39.50lb |
| Remaining: | 40.50lb |
| 26 |
| May '12 |
| < | May | > | ||||
| S | M | T | W | T | F | S |
| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | ||
| 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 |
| 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 |
| 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 |
| 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | ||
The mirror of denial...
The mirror has always lied, when I was my heaviest, the mirror didn't tell me so. And now that I have lost, the mirror still sees me the way I was.
Okay, truthfully, it's me that is the problem, not the mirror. I see what I want to see. It's not everyday that I see this person. I wonder if I will always see myself at my heaviest.
I hate that darned mirror too. You are not alone.
Is it fat is in the eye of the beholder? I know I see myself that way too. Whatever it is that tells me I've lost weight, I don't believe it - scales, measurements, clothes, comments from others. Why are we so against ourselves. Is it that we don't want to get our hopes up? You are doing amazingly well, and obviously working out the emotional stuff along the way. How long till the big day now? Thinking of you!
Thanks for commenting on my blog. I'm sorry to hear about your mom. My MIL passed away 3 years ago, as well, and right about the time I was starting to feel better, my mom died. And like yours, it was so unexpected. My mom always wanted to hug me (and everyone else) and when we were in public places, I would sort of push her away. Sure wish I could hug her now.
This first year is just so hard. I know it will get easier in time.
Well, best of luck to you. Sounds like you have an upcoming wedding. That is exciting! Keep up your good work.
Shelley
..tell me why you hate me so!
And it's not just the mirror - there's the dreaded reflection that catches me out every now and then. Walking past the shop window when I see a reflection and it takes me a second to realise that it is me!
It seems so silly to me now, that even when I was thin, I never thought I was thin enough. I was still not happy with my body. Now I would give anything to be that weight again. Maybe next time I'll appreciate myself more and not be so critical!
Right now I dream of even being able to loose 39lbs. You have done so well so far. I know how hard it is to adjust ones perception of oneself. Be gentle with yourself and I hope that you start to get some good sleep soon. i know how horrible sleep deprevation is.
love jacqui
I know, it has lied to me also. I dont see the actual me until I see pictures. Then the reality sets in. Congrats on your weight loss. You are 1/2 there! Great. Keep it up.
Cute little one. Oh, I used to live in Lex but now I am in Louisville but still a Cats fan! Go Big Blue! -J
Hope all is well with you, have popped in to see how you were doing but you haven't blogged in awhile. I hope you are okay.
Just got back on line myself after a long absence! Had a lovely holiday - I hope you did too!? Hope that you are okay?
Love Jacqui
Hope you are okay? Just checking in again to see if you've returned!
Jacqui
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