04/21/2010 09:05
Time, Pain, Cancer , Plastic Surgery, Weight gain, Weight loss
It's been for ever since I posted. Where do I start. Well I was told in Oct I had thyroid cancer. I was very depressed and I started to eat.. NOW I never went to junk food but my throat was so swallow with 2 large Masses on both sides. I mean nothing could get down my throat. So I had to eat milk shakes and sherbet,,,
Then I had to have my whole thyroid removed and told I would have to takes meds every day for the rest of my life. Also that I might get weight problems.. I SAID WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SAYING? OK so I can do the med thing and have mood swings hell I will be 40 in a few weeks.
It s very weird all i could was think about the weight gain ' thyroid 30' that what most all people gain I said no not me I am doing so well and I am a fighter.. My doctors were more worried about my mind regarding the weigh that they wondered if I understood that I had CANCER. Not sure why they were worried about that. I didn't give my self cancer so i didn't feel guilty about that. I had to just let the Docs take over..
So after my surgery I was told it had spread to my neck so i would have to do RADIOACTIVE TREATMENT. I had to stay in the hospital for 5 days with out any human contact..
So as sson as I got out. Well 2 weeks later I went back for my follow up scan and guess what I know have it in my head. Yes I am more then depressed. Every one I know say eat what you want you have cancer . What the Hell does that mean? is it like OK your on a vacation from life?
I said to the 3 doctors when can I start to work out again. my blood work has not been great. White cell count has been down, Also I have been weak and I am very horse. I also gained 38lbs..
So on March 16tth one day from Saint Patty Days my doc said I don't like the idea of you working out but he also said that my mind being set on losing the weight seemed to worry him more. So he said I give you the green light to work out as long as I take it easy LMAO no Irish person takes it easy.
So the very next day I woke up and I was so tired like a truck hit me I could not move. Then I sat on my bed at 5 am and I took in the picture on my sister dying a painful death. Drowning in her own fluids. She could not walk 4 steps with out help from us.. She was a fighter she just lost the fight.
So I said i can do this even if I just drive to the gym and sit in locker room. At lease I would have done what I said I was going to do. GO TO THE GYM..
I got here and so many people were happy to see me and I could see they knew I had gained weight. they also knew that I had cancer. they all lied and said you look great.. I usually hate when people lie to me about my weight.
I have been to the gym 27 times in one month and as of APRIL 17th I lost 27 lbs.. I could not believe it. I have worked my ASS off and I went to my Doc today and he said I can not believe it. YOU did what you said you were going to do.
He said I want to draw blood and see how you are. Well on the visit before my closteral was 165 and on this day it was a total of 116. He said he would not have believed it unless he saw it.
The reason I am writ ting this blog is for a few reasons. One I needed to get it off my chest. another one was I have been reading post on here for the last day and people are saying I am just to tired to get up, I only had a couple cookies, im not sure why I am not losing I only eat a few times a week..
People please I know that some have health issue but a Cookie and a diet soda are not going to help that fact at all. So get your ass out of bed and workout..Your body will only be as good as you make it.
I wrote in one of my blogs that I hoped that I would not gain weight. I did gain 37lbs, I also said I would write that to be as honest as possible. No i did not go off my life style my life has taken me to a new kind of life were I will have to be even more cautious about my food and what I eat.
Every day I feel like a truck has hit me and I cant keep my head up. I also cant sleep. I guess that's why I am writing at 3am I have ot be in the gym at 5am.
So after I went to my cancer I went to see a plastic surgeon and he looked me all over and I do mean all over. Then he asked me to get dressed and said please come back to dis suss what he thought,
he started off saying that you have the most beautiful fave that I may have ever seen, You need no work there. You chin and neck look great so do my arms.
Then he says for a person that has loss the amount of weight i have he was expecting things to be much worse. He said i could use a body lift. a med one, my tummy could have a tuck and my ass. I said how much for all of it, he said 56 thousand dollars and it would be 3 surgery.. He also said the trade would be alot of scars up and down my body..
I said I was going to think on it. I did and I called this trainer I have seen at the gym and she is tough but I have seen her clients and they look great. She said I cant fix all that but I can you much more tone. I also said I am going to try a spray tan. Ican get in the sun due to my scar. Maybe this 500 dollar treatment will work.
Well I like to say that I am great but that is not the case but I know people that are much worse off then me . So when I think I cant run or walk or do a class then I think of them and it gets me out the door.
I like to leave tips here when I have them..... I have thought of these walking in the ttead mill.
1. check all your emails in the treadmill during your warm up.. U can knock 2 things out at once.
2. take your kids to gym yes at 5am so its one hour earlier. You get to work out and shower in peace and it cost you 2 dollars to know that they were starting there day off having fun
3. I dont run or walk to the time clock it takes to long. i do it to songs on my ipod. I started with one song for running then I got higher and higher I am also most at whole album.
4. watching people at the gym can give you good work out ideas.
5. You will feel wonderful.......
6. sit in the sunua with all our clothes and sweat. I stay in 12 mins and iam so hot. It feels like I lost 5 lbs every time.
So these are some of my tips and I will end this update with saying that I love.
Your goals,minus your doubts,equal your reality
PS this site still has no spell check . Sorry guys I am terible at spelling.