My Journey to a size 8

Off the Wagon and the Scale Hates Me

Monday, December 3, 2007 00:05:09

I might cry. I got sick for a week and then I went on a vacation and now my scale is up. I had gotten down to 149-150 and now I got on the scale this morning and it is registering 153...not happy at all. I am going to hope it is a fluke and that when I weigh in tomorrow itll be like no, just kidding youre still 150. Adding 3 pounds BACK on just makes me 3 more pounds away from my goal, so frustrating. My trip was nice and lazy, it was nice to get away from the stresses of life for a little while but apparently I can't do that any more. The funny thing is that I really didnt eat that much while I was on vacation but I didn't workout my normal 1.5-2 hours a day so I guess that was it.

Anyway, I hope that everyone is doing well and that you all have been staying on track. Please hope for me that I really am not off track by 3 pounds because that would be devastating! Ok well I am out to do chores and then get my workout in, best of luck to everyone!!!

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I disappeared for a while...

Saturday, December 1, 2007 23:08:22

I have to admit, I disappeared from the site for a while but I continued to exercise and eat well during the whole time. I am down to about 151-152, struggling to get in to the 140s. I did not get job that I interviewed for which was truly a bummer but it seems harder and harder now to get a job -- makes me which I had stayed in the DC area for grad school and just shelled out extra money instead of going to a different area. At least then I would have had a job in this area! I guess time is necessary to really find a job that I am a good fit for, I am just truly impatient - both with weight loss and jobhunting.

I am going on a little mini-getaway to Texas at the end of this week which will give me a nice opportunity not to focus on finding a job, or really being unable to find a job. I am dreading it a little bit though because it seems that the person I am visiting wants to go out and eat quite a bit and that might not be the best idea since I am trying to get in better shape.

In other news I had the bridesmaids dress fitting and I went with the size or two smaller than what my measurements were in early Jan and the dress fit, there was a little room at the top but other than that it did fit. I was still unfortunately the largest bridesmaid and it was not the most flattering dress but such is life. I do find it quite funny that although I am the largest bridesmaid (in terms of dress size) I have the smallest feet and hands (size 6.5 and 4.5 ring finger with really teeny wrists). It makes no sense! Makes me just think in my head why isn't the rest of me teeny? Ah life. How you make no sense sometimes!

Ok well wanted to write a quick update since I havent been here in FOR-EVER. I hope that everyone is doing well and that you are all succeeding with your plans. Keep up the great work!!!

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Just gotta push...

Friday, November 30, 2007 22:01:21

So I got sick on Saturday night/Sunday morning which prompted me to make yesterday my day off of working out. I got back on track today, doing my 90 mins on the cycle. I still feel achy from being sick but I figured that I just needed to push through it because if I start letting myself have excuses I wont continue to be as good as I have been.

So the bride who is making the dresses for her wedding has already made 3 out of the 5 dresses! I certainly do not want to do the fitting any time soon, I'd like a month before it so that I can be like "Oh no, its too big! Looks like we have to take it in!" Wouldn't that be the ideal situation!

Weight loss is soooo slow, I hate that I struggle with this day in day out. I guess when I really start to see major results then it'll be easier. I did have a little fashion show the other night before bed. I was able to get back into a bunch of my size 10 workpants, although they are all the same brand (Calvin Klein) and I think he is a little more generous and forgiving than some other designers. Although I fit they were a little tight in the waist area, giving me the always attractive, and so endearingly named, muffintop. Hopefully that will be gone in a few weeks or months.

Well I think I am going to wrap it up, I hope you all had a great weekend and that things are going well for you!

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that cancel button is way too easy to push.

Friday, November 30, 2007 23:08:12

I totally wrote this whole blog and accidently pressed cancel, wow smooth move on my part. Although it might have been for the best, I wrote a blog about how I wish that after exercise little pieces of the fat that corresponded to how many calories you burned just fell off so you could see how much progress you are making (creepy sounding but I think it would be effective!).

Anyway, I am excited that I will be in the 150s sometime soon, not the biggest achievement but it would be nice to get out of the 160s. Gotta take the little things and make them worth it or else I totally will give up.

I have a phone interview this afternoon for a job that seems pretty complicated, hopefully it'll go ok. I feel like I do better in person and impress people more but this woman is only in the office 3-4 times per year so that isn't really possible. It's a little scary because the job description they sent to me states that it is a senior level staff position, who knows how this will go, I will just hope for the best.

Gotta workout sometime soon so that I can get my workout in prior to the interview, today is a 90 minute cycle ride day. I must say that those 90 minute sessions really hurt my derriere! Its been three weeks and I just cannot seem to get used to being saddlesore! Anyway, I think I am out for the day. I hope you all are doing well and keeping on keeping on. Keep up the great work everyone!

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motivation is hard to keep...

Friday, November 30, 2007 23:07:13

Thinking back to my prior weight I get really upset. I was in the 150s but I was able to fit in my size 9 or 11 pants. Right now I am less than 10 pounds heavier than that but I can't even try to fit in them. I also think about it and I thought I was "fat" at a size 10 and now according to my measurements I am a size 16 on top and a size 14 on the bottom...it makes me want to cry. It is so aggrivating that I let myself do this and it just confuses me how 10 pounds can make such a huge different and then weeks and weeks to get rid of, and who knows if I'll be able to fit back into my size 9s after I lose the ten pounds. I guess what it comes down to is that I'm scare that all my hard work wont even take me back to a place where I was a few months ago, a place where I thought I was fat but would kill to be back at now.

It's really hard being so angry at myself for letting myself just eat and eat and slack off simply because I was stressed out and unhappy with work and school. I fight with this, I have been good, eating better and exercising for at least an hour 6 days a week. Since I've started about 2 weeks ago Ive lost 5 pounds, lost 4 the first week and 1 this past week.

In addition I am supposed to be in a wedding this July, I was asked to be in it about a week and a half ago after I had already told myself I was going to get back in shape. Well problem is that now my friend is asking for my measurements since she is going to make the dresses herself. Apparently the sizes she sent are european sizes and this really didn't help my mood -- according to the measurements I am supposed to be a size 20 top and a size 16 bottom.

I'm feeling really discouraged, this is not good. I'm not really sure how to get myself back on track motivationwise. I just can't get past that I let myself creep up two clothing sizes and now I have to struggle to get somewhere that I wasnt happy with at the time. I calculated that if I were to lose 1.5 pounds per week that I would reach 125 pounds by July 17th. I would be so happy with that but it seems as if 1.5 pounds per week isnt going to happen and keeping the motivation while I am slowly plugging along is just really hard. If anyone has any suggestions on keeping motivation strong I would really appreciate it, its hard and I know I am not the only one who feels this way.

Anyway enough of my gloom and doom post. I have to go workout in 40 mins and figure out what I am going to do with myself. I hope everyone is doing well and hanging on.

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didn't workout today...feeling a little guilty

Friday, November 30, 2007 23:01:22

Today wasn't the best day for my diet. I didn't do all that poorly but I took today as my day off for exercising -- did 6 days in a row and had a headache today and now I am just a little frustrated that I didn't workout. I expect a lot from myself, sometimes too much, just frustrating.

Still working on the job hunt. Got told yesterday that I was overqualified for an admin assistant position, which very well may be true considering I have an MBA but still! I need a job and right now it just feels incredibly stressful. I will push on and continue to workout and apply for jobs, such is my life. It's back to working out tomorrow, gotta make sure I don't fall off track.

I hope everyone is doing well, keep up the good work!!!

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I'm back

Friday, November 30, 2007 23:00:12

I've been away for a while. I gained about 10 pounds in the 2-3 months that I was gone because I overate due to stress from work and school. I finally graduated with my masters and left that job so those stressors are gone. Now I have the stress of living with my parents and trying to find a job but I am trying to handle it better, and not overeat.

I started at around 165-166 about 2 weeks ago and as of today I am at 162. I would ultimately like to get down to 125 but I would be thrilled with 135, I guess I will just have to play it by ear and see what my body can handle and what I look like when I get there.

My routine as of late has been 1 hour on the upright bike 6 times a week and just trying not to overeat. My family is actually going out to eat tonight, first time in a few weeks, Red Lobster. Cheddar Bay Biscuits are a weakness of mine. I think what I might make myself do is only eat one biscuit and eat half of my dinner and take the rest home.

Anyway, I think I am out of here. Gotta workout soon. I hope everyone is doing well and having a great start to the year 2008!

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i hate the scale

Tuesday, October 31, 2006 00:09:00

yeah i shouldnt have weighed myself, especially at night and a few days before a certain time of the month but i did and it says 159. not to mention my friend is being a real jerk about the football game and im just so tired of this

on a side note i biked 17.5 miles on monday, tuesday I am going to shoot for 22.5 to make it a total of 40 over 2 days, lets see how that works

hope everyone is doing well

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gotta keep going...

Tuesday, October 31, 2006 00:02:17

biked 18 miles today to add to my total.

so ive been thinking and although i am really impatient and would really prefer to be thin right now that its not the worst thing in the world to take my time and be more logical about it. i would ultimately like to be down around 120 pounds by March/April time frame which is almost 40 pounds over the course of 6 pounds, so about 7 pounds per month which i doable, it will take persistance but its physically possible. i just have to keep my motiviation and realize that if get down to that weight that i will have to work to keep it off but that i will be happier and healthier in the long run. right now i am fighting off the desire to go get an arbys turkey and swiss sandwich, so good but it has 700 calories!

anyway, im thinking that what i might end up doing is quit my job sometime in the near future and get a job working in a gym as a personal trainer and maybe actually use my undergraduate degree. i dont have a personal training cert but a lot of places accept a 4 year degree instead which personally i think is the right way to go but hey what can you do? i can motiviate other people but when it comes to motivating myself that is sometimes where i have trouble but i feel like i am really on the right track this time.

ok well i gotta figure out what to do about dinner before class, night class tonight and then tomorrow i have work and a presentation in class then its no more school for the week....cant wait until i am done! hope everyone is doing well!

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bike miles

Tuesday, October 31, 2006 00:01:22

today i biked 17.5 miles

too tired to blog really but logging in my miles because i said i would. up early tomorrow maybe?

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