Me time

I have withdrawn from the ab challenge as well.  I am going to try and do them anyway...  but with the wedding in 3 weeks, my FMIL staying, going away next weekend, FH saying he thinks he will ask a second groomsman , work actually getting busy and my beauty routine getting serious life has kicked up a gear.

I need some me time that is guilt free over the next few weeks.  So I am not going to do any challenges, not going to put any pressure on myself.

On a lighter note today we went up the Eureka tower and did the 'Edge' experience (http://www.eurekaskydeck.com.au/the-edge.asp).  It was amazing!!!!!

We are trying to show FMIL as much of the area as we can (she is 73 so we have to wonder if she will be back) without exhausting her and while still working ourselves!  It is fun but I am getting tired myself!

Today I am grateful:

Challenge Withdrawal :(

I am sorry, but my osteopath has banned me from even unnecessary walking.

I am allowed to do my dance lessons (mainly because he knew I was going to anyway!) and gentle stretches.  For at least the next 2 weeks.

I am to take ibuprofen for 3-4 days to reduce the inflammation (I refused anything stonger).

But beside all of that, I will do whatever is required to NOT limp down the aisle!  And sadly right now that means dropping out of the challenge.

Sorry Judy!    BUT I promise I will still encourage the other challengers!!

day 12 of 23 with 22 days until wedding day!

Exercise last night was 20 minutes bowling on the wii fit.

It is great having Ian's Mum here, he is so happy!

I have to work in the office today, but that is fine.  My osteopath is near work and I desperately need to see him.  My hip is sore enough that I have had to take pain killers the past two days.

OK better grab a quick breakfast before I head off.

Day 11 of 23 (23 til wedding)

Yes, my 21 day challenge is stretching! Yesterday, in my defense, went like this:

• 4:45am get up and log into work PC to check the status of an issue
• 5am sms team member to ask her to come in at 7am as issue is resolved
• 6am sms team member to confirm she is coming in
• 7:30am find out we still have an issue
• 7:30am til 2pm spend time on phone and email to get new issue resolved.
• 2pm til 5:30pm update 4 people on progress by phone and email, fight fires, get small issues investigated
• 5:30pm leave for airport to collect FMIL
• 9pm get home from airport and eat dinner, chat with FMIL
• 10pm fall into bed

So... you may have noticed a lack of exercise!  Unless I count the trek from the car to arrivals at the airport??  Nah... was not even 10 minutes each way..

So I now have 23 days in my challenge and 2 X's.

I am grateful:

Chocolate free

I don't track my weight - but I do get on the scales sometimes.  I remember the main numbers but not anything after the '.'

So I think I have lost some weight.  It was 88. and is now 87.  I think. 

Amazing what not eating chocolate does!

Day 10 of 22, 24 days til the wedding

I forget sometimes that I have 'new' blog readers.

I have been a WW girl for about 11 years now!  The first time I had great success and got to my goal weight.  Due to other emotional issues I stacked it back on in the same amount of time it took to lose it!

Since then I have tried again and have had periods of success, but it is never sustained.

A few months ago I decided that the pain of being overweight was much less than the pain of dieting for me.  And I recalled an approach a dietitian had introduced me to called 'If not dieting - then what?'.  So I made a decision.  No more dieting!

And the relief was HUGE!

I was just having a day of doubts yesterday.  I know this approach works for me.  I just need to give it time.  And remember to listen to my body!

I am grateful:

Day 9 of 22, 25 days til the BIG DAY

So many things on my mind!

I have pretty much decided a no on the teaching course.  3 subjects a semester plus full time owrk to maybe not change jobs anyway?  Nah!!!

I was also thinking about WW because Mum has restarted.

But instead I am having a chocolate free week (started last night) and will see what that does to those pesky scales!

I have already noticed I am alowing myself to get hungry when there is no chocolate!!

I am having trouble sometimes commenting on blogs.  Sorry if I am not getting to write to you - I am able to read them all!!!

I might have to go back to google reader!

Oops got interrupted by a work request!

Back with more later...

Fiona has a decision

This is non weight related, but I really value your input!

I earn quite a large amount of money in my IT job.  I don't really enjoy it anymore.  I don't hate it.  But I am very uninspired by it.

What I would love to do is teaching.  But it would literally be 30% of my current salary.

I am the main breadwinner. 

I have been accepted into a 3 year part time course to become a teacher. 

It will cost about $28,000 over the three years.  Most of which you pay back as a % of your income (3% I think) but you pay interest!

Oh and I would have to accept that my investments and early retirement plans would stop.

I cannot see myself dropping our standard of living to accomodate such a reduced salary.

So here are my options:

1. Do I do the course in the belief that over the next 3 years circumstances will change and I will not be so reliant on my income?  Taking the risk that I could study for 3 years and not teach if our finances don't change...

2. Do I not do the course and save the money I would spend, and instead do

a) courses related to IT and move to a different job within IT

b) work 4 days a week in IT because I find I hate it a lot less when I do that

I know I am the only one who can decide... but opinions welcomed!

Day 8 of 22 (26 til wedding)

As this is Missy's challenge and she has suggested I just add an extra day on the end of the challenge rather than restarting I am going to go with that.

I did a 20 minute lunchtime walk.  I will do 1 hour dancing tonight.  So I am well on track.

Thanks for the supportive comments.  My mood has improved considerably since that post.  I never stay down long!  I have not got a long enough attention span .

Today I am grateful:

(BTW HRT is not for me, my Mum went off it earlier this year and even though she denies it her mood really suffered.  She is now on natural supplements for post menopausal women and in just 3 days I can feel a difference in her mood.  Even when annoyed she is more positive.  And she went back to WW this morning!  Coincidence??  Sadly for her she had put on 17kg (about 37lb) since she stopped going almost 12 months ago.  But she loves her new leader and sounds really inspired)

Fiona's Monday

Well.

I would like to give you a heads up right now.  I may not be able to complete the challenge.  I will do my best - today we have a dance lesson so that is taken care of!

But you may have read that Saturday I fell asleep quite early.  I have been very tired for several days.

Sadly this coincided with the end of a 5 day period of not getting my Valtrex prescription refilled. 

Yesterday I appeared to have an outbreak.  I am still not 100% sure, but there is some sort of lesion.  I will know in a day or two.

If it is an outbreak, it usually means about a week of excessive tiredness. 

Oh and you are probably wondering what I may have an outbreak of. 

That almost deserves a blog of its own.

About 13 years ago I was told I had a form of shingles.  I had outbreaks when stressed and run down.  Sometimes I would go a year or two with no outbreaks.  Sometimes I would get 3 outbreaks in 2 months.

About 3 years ago I went to see a Dr when I had an outbreak as I had heard there was something I could take to reduce the severity.

He tested me for herpes.  And that is what I have.  No matter how many times I tell myself it is the same thing I had when I thought it was called shingles I still feel shame in saying herpes.

Apparently 1 in 8 people have it.  If 1 in 8 of my friends have it they keep it quiet!  Maybe they feel the same way I do. 

Anyway, the good news is when I take valtrex I get no outbreaks.  Also Ian has no issues at all with it. 

My ex did.  He made me feel dirty and ashamed and was constantly worried he would catch it.

It is really hard having something incurable that can make you feel dirty and ashamed.  Makes me want to eat chocolate.  Makes me want to become a fat pig.

Then I feel ashamed for over reacting because it is not life threatening.  It is controlled very well by the valtrex.  Life could be a lot worse!

Luckily I only feel this way whan I have outbreaks.  Which is rare these days.

Hmm I think I needed to get that out of my system.

Thanks for 'listening'.