Tape Measure

 For anyone who is interested, here are my current measurements at 239. I will update them again at 229. 

Rachel

Date - 01/13/08

Neck - 16.5

Bicep - 16

Lower Arm - 11.75

Chest - 49.5

Waist - 43.5 (not good for diabetes - should be lower than 35)

Belly - 52.25 (YIKES!!!!)

Thigh - 27

Calf - 16.75

FYI - in case you were curious, I never really care about what my hips are. It is like the most crazy thing - even though I'm a girl, I never gain weight there. It's almost ALL in my upper body. Which, unfortunately, is horrible from a health stand point. :( 

Rachel

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The River

 A dream is like a river, ever changing as it flows, 

and the dreamers just a vessel that must follow where it goes. 

Trying to learn from what's behind you, never knowing what's in store

Makes each day a constant battle just to stay between the shores. 

And I will sail my vessel till the river runs dry, 

Like a bird upon the wind, these waters are my sky.

I'll never reach my destination, if I never try - 

so I will sail my vessel till the river runs dry. 

Too many times we stand aside and let the waters slip away,

what we put off till tomorrow, has now become today. 

So don't you sit upon the shore line and say your satisfied, 

chose to chance the rapids, and dare to dance the tide. 

And I will sail my vessel till the river runs dry, 

Like a bird upon the wind, these waters are my sky.

I'll never reach my destination, if I never try - 

so I will sail my vessel till the river runs dry. 

And there's bound to be rough waters, and I know I'll take some falls;

With the good Lord as my captain, I can make it through them all.

And I will sail my vessel till the river runs dry, 

Like a bird upon the wind, these waters are my sky.

I'll never reach my destination, if I never try - 

so I will sail my vessel till the river runs dry. 

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This is the song that I sing to my daughter every night before she goes to bed. Sometimes I wonder why I struggle taking my own advice.... :) 

Rachel

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Vampire Candy

 Blood sugar! Get it? haha :) 

So this morning I went in for my three hour glucose test to check for diabetes. I got there at about 8:30 and lucky for me all the ladies there were really nice. The got me in really fast (because they knew the longer I waited, the longer it would keep me there) and I jumped the line in front of everyone else. 

They were pretty good pokers, and I know because I have horrible veins. Even when I'm skinny I end up getting the multiple pokes because they just don't stick up like a normal person. They took my fasting, made me drink that horrible crap that tastes like melted cheap orange popsicles, and they sent me to the "gluclose waiting room". 

There was another lady in there watching her iPod. After we both had our second draw, I decided that I was bored enough to screw with the 100 year old TV and VCR on the other side of the room. I hooked it all up (thank goodness I know how to hook up a VCR!) and started to look through the movies they had in there. I thought that was pretty funny because it was a really, really odd selection for a doctors office! There was like Rambo, Slience of the Lambs, Kiss the Girls, Die Hard - like I would say that out of the probably 20 movies, 18 of them were R rated killer movies. That's fine with me but I just thought it was odd. I was expecting like Air Bud or something like that! :) Finally the lady and I decided on Seven, and it made the time go by a lot faster. 

I ended up with a total of 5 pokes and finally got out of there at 12:00. Hopefully everything goes fine! I'm hoping that they just tell me that my levels are high and I need to lose some weight like last time - but I have to prepare myself for the chance that I have finally crossed that line into diabetes. 

Ugh, wish me luck. 

Rachel

239

US vs THEM

 Okay, I know that probably 95% of us on here have very busy lives. And a lot of the time when we tell friends or co-workers that we are trying to lose weight, this is how part of the conversation goes:

US: Yeah, I'm trying to lose some weight. Eating is going okay, but I just don't have time to get a workout in. 

THEM: Sure you do! Get up early, or do it after the kids go to bed.

US: I suppose, I'm just so tired at the end of the day and I need the sleep.

THEM: You're just making excuses. Stop being so lazy! 

I HATE THIS CONVERSATION! 

I know they are just trying to help, but 99 times out of 100, this particular conversation is with someone who is a) skinny already, b) doesn't have a kid, and c) DOESN'T WORKOUT THEMSELVES. (That last one is usually the kicker for me personally.)

I know that a lot of you do get up early and workout, or go to the gym in the middle of the night, and I say BRAVO! You lady, are awesome. But for me, well, here was my average day yesterday:

5:30 - Alarm goes off - whine and hit snooze

5:50 - Actually get out of bed, brush teeth and get in the shower

6:15 - Get the car packed to go and get Harper up and ready

6:45 - Leave for Daycare

7:45 - Drop Harper off, leave for work

8:00 - Work

11:30 - Lunch (in order for me to get off early in time to beat traffic to get to Harper I can only take a half an hour) and if I can squeeze it in a walk around the park

12:00 - Back to work

4:30 - Leave to get Harper

5:30 - Pick up Harper (what takes 15 min in the morning, takes an hour during rush hour) 

5:45 - Head home

7:00 - Make dinner for fam, watch Harp 

7:30 - Eat, feed Harp

8:00 - Laundry, lunches, dishes, pack diaper bag, feed cat, etc. 

8:30 - Harper's bath, PJ's, story, bottle, bed

9:00 - Fold clean laundry while maybe watching one TV show

10:00 - Fall into bed

That's our normal day. And even when Terry and I split up the evening chores, 9 times out of ten it still takes us till 9:00 to get all the stuff done so we are ready to shoot out the door in the morning and not be late for work. 

So yeah, I could work out after 9:00 and go to bed at 11:00 or I could wake up at 4:30 to work out. But honestly, I feel like I'm burning out as it is with our schedule. I think that if someone even said to me, "I'll pay you $50 a day to get up at 4:30 to workout!" I don't think I could do it for more than a week. 

But, we are all busy, and I need exercise somehow, someway. Ugh. I'm not really sure what to do about the situation. I think that in March, when Harper turns one and we are switching her to a different daycare, I will try to get to work by 7:00 and out by 3:30 - that should get me home around 5:00 instead of 7:00 - maybe then I can take her out for walks after I get home. 

Till then I guess it's sneaking in that walk in the park as much as I can! 

Rachel

239

My Pop Candy Interview!

 For anyone who's interested, here's my 'reader of the day' feature from the Pop Candy blog on USA Today! :) 

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Pop forum: Talk amongst yourselves

Pop Candy Reader of the Day!!

 Wow! I got a surprise today! There is this other blog I read every day (Pop Candy on usatoday.com ) and they made me their reader of the day! WOO HOO! :) 

http://blogs.usatoday.com/popcandy/2008/01/reader-of-the-d.html#more

That's pretty cool! It has an interview I did and everything! Go Me! :) 

Rachel 

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Round and round she goes! Where she stops, nobody knows!

 Ok so, I'm about to tell you guys about something that I do everyday and I can already hear the millions of objections I'm going to get about it....

I weigh myself every day. 

Yep, I get out of bed, go pee, take off my clothes for the shower and hop on the scale. Then I write that days number on the list on the wall that my husband and I both keep. 

Now I can hear all of you now. "You are supposed to weigh only once a week! You are going to discourage yourself! Your weight flucuates!" And I know all that, but for me, here are the three possible outcomes for the day:

a) I weigh less than the day before

Awesome! I go through the day on a cloud, knowing that I'm doing good and want to stay on track!

b) I weigh the same

It's okay - maybe I'll try a little harder to be active today if I can. 

c) I gained

It's still ok - I know that my body has water weight changes everyday, or maybe I will have to go to the bathroom later, or yes, even the possibility that I haven't been perfect the last few days. It reminds me to stay on track before things get out of control. 

Personally for me, I LIKE to see the biology of how my body works. I don't mind a one or two pound wave in either direction. It's not enough to throw me off track. But I'll tell you what IS enough to throw me off track, if I go a whole week of doing great, feeling like I've done everything super and eating great and then my weigh in day comes and I'm up two pounds from the last weigh in. THAT will screw with my head! It's probably just a day that I was retaining water, but I don't know that because I haven't been keeping a steady eye on it and now I want to give up because I feel like all my effort went to waste. OR I lose like 4 pounds in a week! And yeah, maybe its one of those freak weeks where you actually do, but chances are I had like soup and a lot of water the day before and my system is totally flushed out. Then I'm just bound to be dissapointed the next week when I gain back two pounds - really I've probably lost two but don't see it because of the water loss before! 

I figure as long as you can roll with the punches of the 3 pound up or down trend of everyday and you really want to see how different foods effect your body, then I say go for it! Whatever keeps you on track is a positive thing. :)

Rachel 

241

(See, I'm back up from yesterday - but yet not freaking out ;) 

Move it! I gotta pee!

 I am giving myself a round of applause for leaving my cave of an office to go outside walking today over my lunch break for 30 min. 

Although I don't think I would recommend this to anyone who had three cups of coffee like I did earlier in the morning.... 

Rachel :) 

240

Fast Food is Healthy

 Ok - now wait. Just hear me out! :) 

I was thinking about this on the way in while I was dreaming of a Egg McMuffin and frowning thinking of the oatmeal waiting for me at work. If you were to just ask our bodies - ONLY our bodies - not our minds, not our doctors - just our core self-preservation bodies, "Body, what is the type of food that you think is the best stuff I can eat for my overall survival?" and it would answer "The most fatty, tasty, greasy, high calorie thing that you can get your hands on." 

This is actually true. I watched a special a while back on MSNBC about why it is so freakin hard to lose weight. The main reason - WE ARE NOT PROGRAMED TO EVER EVER EVER LOSE WEIGHT.  Every fiber of our entire system, head to toe, fights it! Our bodies, our core instincts - want us to eat to survive and store up as many calories as we can get our hands on. There is no switch in our caveman like instincts that says "Ok wait - I still wanna look good in that bathing suit this spring. Better stop!" No, all our body says in a prehistoric voice, "CALORIES GOOD! EAT FAT! ME NO STARVE!" 

Our bodies don't know that we don't have to hunt for our food anymore. We have only really had the luxury of not having to hunt for like maybe 100 years. We are fighting thousands of years of instinct!! No wonder we have so much trouble! 

i just wanted to put this out there to say that in all reality fast food is healthy in a way. I mean, it's really more the MODERATION that we have a problem with. Think about how hard a vegan has to work just to get enough calories and protein to survive. We are supposed to have stuff with meat and fat and calories! That's why our bodies think they taste good and that a big ol plate of plain veggies tastes like crap! We would starve to death if carrots tasted like french fries and every thing we consider "junk" now if we had to choke down anything that had a calorie count over 100.

We are supposed to have that stuff - but the problem is that we don't burn off the calories we used to use to have to catch what we wanted to eat!! :) 

I just thought that this might help some people when they cant understand WHY they just can't seem to keep the cravings down. You are fighting thousands of years of instinct! If you have even lost just one pound, you are putting up one hell of a fight!! Keep up the good work!!! Tell your body who's the boss!! :) 

Rachel 

240

P.S. Think of it this way - your body is so freaking cool and effiecent that if it were back in the day of the caveman all of us girls would be at the top of our game! Biologically we have the type of metabolism that would have made us survivors! Those girls who can eat all day and not gain an ounce would never make it! Let's not be mad at our bodies for the cool amazing systems that they are - we just gotta learn to control it! :)

Someone adores my fat :)

 Tonight, even after all the feelings I've had about my health and stuff lately, I realized something. As much as I hate my big ol flabby belly and over stuffed boobs - there is someone who completely adores them. My daughter. 

Every time we cuddle up on the couch or I hold her to rock her to sleep, she snuggles into me using my rolls, lumps and bumps as warm squishy pillows. I'm probably just about the most comfortable place to sleep she'll ever have.

I sat there rocking her tonight, with her head snuggled into my chest and thought, "I wonder if I were a size 10 if she would be as comfortable there?" 

Uh oh - thats her crying now. Gotta go. Better put my fluff to good use while I still can. :) 

Rachel

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