...to fall of the wagon, especially when you have just started. So it's been five days, and five days gone good and bad. Every morning I have woken up, eaten breakfast with the renewal that I will stick to it today. Pressures at work have goteen to me. I get called and asked to meet people down in the cafeteria and oh my lord how much easier and how good, not so good for you food tastes. I've been going back and forth with a few pounds but haven't gone over my latest 5 lb loss. To make matters worse, I got a phone call from my gym because I have made it on their 'low usage' list....I didn't even know such existed. I know they are just trying to help and be supportive but damn when I heard that message, my heart dropped, because that's a little embarassing.
This week will be a little hell at work, I'm doing a few doubles and working on my day off, but I need the money, struggling post college student that makes no money and has lots of bills (my own fault of course but I'm working to get out of that situation). On a happier note, my application to Old Dominion University has been fully submitted and is in the review process. So I am really hoping that this could be the change that I need to boost my life, career wise and financially. Once again, I want to get involved in other things besides work beacuse all I do when I'm not working is sitting around or going out to eat with friends. They have a lot of great classes there, not to mention I drive by it at least twice a day cause it's on the same road I live on. Key words...DRIVE BY!!
My mother will be visiting in a few weeks and I would like to have a noticable weight loss for when she comes...tomorrows goal: stick to eating smart, enjoy a movie after work with my bf and got to the mother truckin gym, oh and watch the new Intervention--it's about a kid that is like 550 pounds, maybe I just need to watch shows like that all the time because I seem to cry and want to change and have the motivation to change but never do. Oh well, here we go again!
So this is day one. I read in one of those magazines once that has all healthy skinny people in it that try starting a 'diet' on a Tuesday instead of a Monday that way it's not so cliche. I'm also trying to get into a new routine in the mornings in hopes to incooporate some sort of exercise in the morning too but sometimes it will be tough as my schedule at the hospital is sometimes crazy and follows no pattern whatsoever. This morning we are off to a good start, was up at 5, showered, dressed and ate breakfast all by 530 and I don't have to leave until 630. Granted I still have to do hair and makeup but that can be a quick process.
So I know I can do this, you know how, because two weeks ago I did this for one day, survived eating pretty good and keeping track of everything I put in my mouth. For breakfast I had a bowl of cereal and juice (something that is hard for me to part with in the morning) but I found lower calorie-single service bottles of my favorite juice so for breakfast I've consumed 250 calories and 4 grams of fat...wow that seems so little yet it was pretty fulfilling. I also got on my high tech scale that I bought and me being sick last week and not eating much, took five pounds off. So today I am 275, 46.8% body fat and 39% water. I want those numbers to change just as my as I want my weight to change. Your are supposed to be nearly 50% water--so I'm dehydrated (technically) and 20-25% body fat (or something like that).
Ok, so here is my latest attempt to lose the weight. Throughout this blogging system, I will write reasons why I was to lose weight, in hopes of looking back and continue to have motivation. Some are real deep and others extremely trivial, but they are important for me. I am going to try to use this blog to chronicle my ups, down, loses, gains, tears and sweat. Also to maybe keep a food journal and analyize caloric intake, fat and sugar consumption and see where I can make changes. I have joined a health club where they have various activities to get involved in. I am going to try to make other small changes to give me a better overall health. RESOLVE: limit soda intake to two cans (servings) per day and make them DIET!! I watched the season premiere of the Biggest Loser last week and I think I cried the whole two hours. During that time is when I wrote down my reasons (almost 40 of them) and I plan to add. Two great things I took away from the program was to NOT DRINK YOUR CALORIES, so all those soda servings adds up to hundreds of calories a day and all I do is drink more because it does not properly hydrate you--SO DRINK MORE WATER. Plus I work at a hospital and I think I need to sugar to get my through the day...NOT TRUE. I am an emotional eater, always have been, so I want to start changing my way of thinking and get involved in other things in my life to get my mind off food. Shit this is going to be hard, but I'm 24, fat, alone and sick and tired of being sick and tired...NEW YEAR--NEW MEGAN!
