I want to tell this story. While at the doctors office on Friday, after I had my weigh in and had gained a pound, I started crying. When I was leaving there was a gal in line at the check out window in front of me. I'm going to an OB/GYN office so there are lots of pregnant ladies there. The lady in front of me was pregnant. The woman working the desk should have, due to privacy concerns, made her phone call elsewhere, but she didn't and I heard every word about the pregnant lady in front of me. The lady at the front desk was calling some kind of specialist to make a referral appointment for the pregnant lady, because tests had come back that her baby was Down syndrome. Here I was crying about the fact I had gained one pound. I prayed for her while I was standing there. Another lady walked to the other window and asked if she could help me. I went up there and paid and made my next appointment. I looked over at the lady. She wasn't crying or anything. Just looked sad. She had just found out she was carrying a Down syndrome child. My heart just went out to her. God knows who she is, so if you're a praying person, say a little prayer for her now. She needs strength. I felt more than a little ashamed that I had cried so hard about one pound. I try to tell myself every day all the good things I have in my life. But some days I get so discouraged and down. But my children are healthy and my daughter in law will be giving me a brand new granddaugher in December, who is as far as we know healthy. Thank you,God!! I've got to work harder to keep things in perspective.
Well, I managed to make it through the weekend, considering how depressed I was about my weight. I haven't been eating as well as I should. However, I haven't done too bad. I made chili Sunday night at home and it was so good. But I only had one bowl. Today is Poopy day. Colonoscopy tomorrow. I'm still at work, but will be going home soon to take the meds to clean out my colon. This colonoscopy is just for a screening because I'm 50. My hubby has had to have 2 so far. The first one because he was bleeding due to hemorroids, then they found polyps. It was a good thing they did it, because one polyp was really big and almost cancerous. The doctor told me they had definately prevented colon cancer. He had to have another one in 2 years which was this past January. He had no polyps in it. He's been pestering me to get mine done. I do have insurance that will pay for it. I finally made the appointment. I dread it so bad. The doctor called me yesterday and my thyroid isn't high after all. So I don't have to take the thyroid medicine, which I am so happy about. It kept me awake at night. I have not taken the phentermine since Friday. I won't take any again until Thursday. I figured maybe I'll lose a pound or so today. Hope so. Wish me luck.
Today I had my first appointment with the doctor who prescribed the phentermine. She will only prescribe a month at a time. I had gained one pound. I was so very discouraged. I cried. I have made a lot of changes to what I eat and have been working out 3 times a week. She said my thyroid was in the normal range, but low normal. She had discussed with an endocronologist her patients that were like this and he advised her to treat them with a low dose. So she wrote me a prescription. I left it to be filled and will pick it up tomorrow. I left work early and came home to rest. I felt so drained. I never did sleep, but rested for a couple of hours. I have a self defense class at the National Fitness Center on Friday nights, so I felt pretty rested up for that. Yesterday I saw my shrink, and she prescribed Ambien CR for my sleep problems. She didn't particularly like me taking phentermine. But I plan to only take it for a month or 2 more. It has been a very discouraging day. But the class was good. It felt great taking down a guy. I broke a nail in class and now can't find a fingernail clipper or file to fix it with. So I guess the day is better if that's the worse crisis I'm having. Tomorrow is a new day and I'll just continue on with the diet. I can do better with what I eat. I added 5 minutes to the eliptical machine tonight. My arms are so sore from practicing the self defense moves and the eliptical machine. I must confess to having a cheeseburger and onion rings for lunch. This was after the weigh in. But I am determined.
Yesterday I had a pretty good day as far as dieting is concerned. for breakfast I had a bowl of Special K almond and vanilla cereal. For lunch I had half of one of those Lean Cusiene flatbreads. I slipped later in the day and had a few fritos. Not many though. When I took my daughter to the eye doctor, I fell asleep in the waiting room. The phentermine causes insomnia really bad. I am taking Ambien but it is only allowing me about 3 hours sleep. I go to the shrink today to discuss this all with her. She is the one who prescribed the Ambien a long time ago. I never know when "sleepy" will hit me. I went home after the doctor appointment and slept for a little while before I went back to work. After work, I went to sleep again. We ended up missing church. I didn't wake up until after 7. Around 8, I fixed some hot dogs. I had one hot dog with pickle relish and mustard, and about 6 fritos. That was all, so I felt like it was a pretty good diet day. I always weigh on Fridays at the fitness center. So tomorrow will be the real test. I will be happy if I can just not gain anything. I feel more serious about losing now than I have in the past. Maybe I'm just getting desperate. I fixed myself some oatmeal this morning. I am drinking sweet tea. I don't know what I'll have for lunch. I had a bowl of cereal about 2:30 this morning. I only slept about 2 hours on the Ambien. I feel today like I'm going crazy, with all the personal issues I have. Guess I'll talk to the shrink about those.
I've been taking Phentermine for a month now. Week before last I gained 5 pounds and last week I lost 3 pounds. I weight at the National Fitness Center on Friday's. I work out there 3 times a week. I am really discouraged right now. When I went off antidepressants I gained 18 pounds. I weighted 190 pounds for many years. The phentermine has caused insomnia. I am taking Ambien. It is a struggle. Today is Wednesday. I have a doctor's appointment Friday morning. I'll write more then.
When I was leaving there was a gal in line at the check out window in front of me. I'm going to an OB/GYN office so there are lots of pregnant ladies there. The lady in front of me was pregnant. The woman working the desk should have, due to privacy concerns, made her phone call elsewhere, but she didn't and I heard every word about the pregnant lady in front of me. The lady at the front desk was calling some kind of specialist to make a referral appointment for the pregnant lady, because tests had come back that her baby was Down syndrome. Here I was crying about the fact I had gained one pound. I prayed for her while I was standing there. Another lady walked to the other window and asked if she could help me. I went up there and paid and made my next appointment. I looked over at the lady. She wasn't crying or anything. Just looked sad. She had just found out she was carrying a Down syndrome child. My heart just went out to her. 
God knows who she is, so if you're a praying person, say a little prayer for her now. She needs strength. I felt more than a little ashamed that I had cried so hard about one pound. I try to tell myself every day all the good things I have in my life. But some days I get so discouraged and down. But my children are healthy and my daughter in law will be giving me a brand new granddaugher in December, who is as far as we know healthy. Thank you,God!! I've got to work harder to keep things in perspective. 
I was so very discouraged. I cried. I have made a lot of changes to what I eat and have been working out 3 times a week. She said my thyroid was in the normal range, but low normal. She had discussed with an endocronologist her patients that were like this and he advised her to treat them with a low dose. So she wrote me a prescription. I left it to be filled and will pick it up tomorrow. I left work early and came home to rest. I felt so drained. I never did sleep, but rested for a couple of hours. I have a self defense class at the National Fitness Center on Friday nights, so I felt pretty rested up for that. Yesterday I saw my shrink, and she prescribed Ambien CR for my sleep problems. She didn't particularly like me taking phentermine. But I plan to only take it for a month or 2 more. It has been a very discouraging day. But the class was good. It felt great taking down a guy. I broke a nail 
in class and now can't find a fingernail clipper or file to fix it with. So I guess the day is better if that's the worse crisis I'm having. Tomorrow is a new day and I'll just continue on with the diet. I can do better with what I eat. I added 5 minutes to the eliptical machine tonight. My arms are so sore from practicing the self defense moves and the eliptical machine. I must confess to having a cheeseburger and onion rings for lunch. This was after the weigh in. But I am determined.