tidings of the week

Hallo everyone!  I am writing an update mostly because I feel that if I don't it's going to get to be a really long time before another.  I've mostly survived the week and weekends without B.  The scale this morning was up a pound, which I am choosing to ignore because I had a great day yesterday.

I started off the day with working on a webpage for the book club that I'm in -- it's looking pretty good so far and I had thought to continue that today maybe a bit later... after that, I met up with a friend of mine whose husband is also out of town and we had lunch at McAllister's -- my first time there and I made a good choice in the corned beef sandwich with side of fruit.  I checked out the nutritionals just now and found them to be to my satisfaction.  Solid work!  Then, I met up with another friend and we went on a bike ride down to the university and then back to my place.  I'm not sure the distance this time, but I'd guess somewhere in the 15 mile range.  Finally, I made some green beans from Trader Joe's and brought them to a work potluck.

I was exhausted by the time I got home.  Oh yeah- I did indulge in a small slice of apple cake, a mini cupcake, and a small piece of brownie at the potluck.  Reasonable, methinks.  Anyway at that point, my [ex]roommate's bf came over with the U-Haul and together we loaded her big items (mattress, couch, coffee table, etc.) into the truck.  He's being really sweet and moving her big items while she's out of town.  After that I pretty much crashed.

I've been having a hard week though.  Every day it's sorta felt like torture after I got home and knew I still had x number of days until B got back.  This is definitely melodramatic, so thank you for indulging me.  I know that a lot of you are in actual long-distance relationships and I wouldn't have any sympathy for myself in your positions either.  However, it's really been testing me, I think, and I don't really mean on an eating level.  Mentally, I've just been feeling like something is wrong, like I'm a little too dependent for my own comfort.

Example: yesterday (Saturday), I felt somewhat like I was waiting all day for B to call (in between all of my activities.  More true on Friday than on Saturday).  I hate waiting.  At the same time, if I call him, he most of the time doesn't answer (bad reception apparently in middle of nowhere MI).  He's been working the whole time including weekends, so he doesn't really get much time to call.  On Friday night he called around 9:30 his time and basically said he couldn't talk long because he had to get up at 5:30 the next day for a 5K race (yeah, fun way to "work", right?).  It's been like that almost everyday as they work until 6:30 and then go out for long group dinners.  I always feel that I'm the one keeping him on the phone, which started really bothering me to the point that I didn't even want to talk to him.

Yesterday, he called around 7:30 when I was still at the potluck just to say they were about to go to dinner.  Then he called back at 11:30 (again, his time) saying they were done eating and were going out to the bar for drinks.  I think he was intending to talk to me then, but it was so loud and noisy in the background and people were talking to him (saying 'bye'?) so it was less than ideal and I asked him if he just wanted to call me back afterward, which he readily agreed to. 

I was already pretty exhausted by that point and also just annoyed that I didn't get to talk with him.  If I'm being honest, I also blame him for not making more time for me.  An hour after that, I shut my ringer off and went to sleep.  B finally called me back at 2:20AM his time.  His message said they'd only had enough cars/designated drivers such that he had to wait until everyone was ready to leave before he could.  I haven't talked to him yet today, surprise, surprise, so I have to keep telling myself it's not his fault he can't talk.

I guess I had more to get off my chest than I had initally thought.  If you got this far, thanks for reading.  If you have any thoughts, would really like to hear 'em.  =)

Hugs

As a fellow long-distance relationship member, I feel for ya, I really do.  Things will work, but you both have to make the attempts.  Good luck and hugs!!

Well....

I think it's all about what you're used to.  And you're not used to him being gone.  So, yes, I have sympathy for you. 

{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}

He'll be back soon and you can see him and talk to him in real.  He is probably wishing he could have talked to you more too.

Long Distance

Hey there!  Thank you so much for all the well wishes for our marriage/wedding!  We had such a great time and the honeymoon was a blast!!!  We had a little over 100 people there.

I've been in the long distance relationship thing before, but not extensively.  I also hate waiting and I get really anxious when he's gone.  I have a hard time sleeping at night when he's not home!  He was gone for 4 days for his bachelor party and I had to keep myself occupied by going and staying at other friends' houses.  I understand that feeling of being too dependent for my own good.

Here's what I think about what happened:  Many/most guys are kind of like that, they don't think the way we do so they assume we're completely fine by ourselves and don't mind if they don't call us to talk very much.  It's hard because if I were you I would be upset and blame him because he made me feel not very important, but deep down you know that he has a lot going on and that he really does care a lot about you.  He probably doesn't even realize or simply understand that he needs to give you more attention while he's gone.  Just remember to be positive and try not to let it get you down too much.

I hope you are doing ok while B's gone, just keep yourself busy busy busy.  Hang out with people, organize the home, read a book.  I like to rent movies and drink wine by myself. ;)

Leanne

I feel ya!

I've been married 13 years and I still feel at a loss when we are apart...But I have also learned to love the time alone...I hang out at the bookstore as long as I want and I eat whatever I want and sometimes I don't take a bath  LOL

Keep Busy Buddy,

Tracy

It's hard

Distance is challenging . . . but what's more challenging is when your expectations from past performance lead to you to think things should be a certain way but circumstances preclude them from being that way.  D used to travel a lot for work and I almost never got used to it.  When he's here, we see each other all the time and talk at least once every day.  But when he's traveling?  Just doesn't happen.  And I still can't get used to it.  We're in the same boat, sister . . .

Hi there

Just saying hello-- sorry that things have been on the rough side with your man... but who knows, it is 8/11 and all could be peachy today.

hope so!

One month

Its been one month since you've posted, Noodles! Whats up? How are things lately? Hope you're doing well. Just wanted to say hi.

Hey there

How's everything-- the best thing about EP is how you get emails that you have a message-- I hope you have this feature activated, b/c it has pulled me back to my friends here on more than one occasion.

No matter what's happening-- we all have our ups and downs, I guess, so I'd love to know how you are doing.  I think I'll be back here for at least a few weeks-- I've got a new trend diet to try (I'm afraid to admit, but it is true.)

:-)