So, I've been struggling with my weight pretty much since I started noticing that I would gain weight (about the middle school age).  I used to be athletic, played softball for about 5 or 6 years in my pre-teen to teen years.  Once I got to high school, my only source of working out was Marching band.  If you have ever done marching band in highschool you'd know that it's not that vigorous of a workout.  With that said, I didn't have the urge to really want to lose weight until my senior year of highschool.  Prom was coming up and I was determined to look good for once.  In highschool I never really thought I was pretty because I was always a bit chunkier that the other girls around me.  All the "pretty" girls, were skinny girls, so there was no way I was classified in that category.  Once I made the decision that year to lose weight, I joined Curves in my hometown and went on a no carb diet for the first 2 weeks.  On top of working out at curves 3 times a week, and eating pretty much no carbs, I also would walk/jog at the track with my girlfriends (which was very motivating and a lot of fun).  It's always SO much easier when you have people around you that are that motivating to you.  So, I guess you could say I was working out pretty much 5 times a week.  (I only did curves 3 times a week though).  By the time prom came around I had lost a total of about 20 pounds.  I was SO unbelievably proud of myself!  I gained a new respect for myself, love for myself and so much confidence I didn't even know I had in me.  Before I lost that weight, I was SO shy around my peers and ALWAYS thought I was the bud of the jokes or that people were judging me.  I NEVER felt comfortable around people when I was overweight.  I kept that weight off for about 5 years (I would fluctuate off and on, but would stay in the same range).  Once I met my now husband in 2007, I started gaining the weight back.  I don't know how I got to this point where I'm at.  I still have most of the confidence that I gained in the beginning, but I know I would feel SO much better about myself if I could just lose the weight all over again.  Except this time, I have so much more weight to lose.  Back in highschool, before I lost the weight; I weighed 192 pounds and got all the way down to 158.  For my height, that's the perfect size.  But now, I'm 27 years old, married, with NO kids and I weigh 213 pounds.  213 pounds......I don't understand HOW I let myself get to this place.  My husband gets so frustrated with me because he knows how badly I want to lose the weight but just can't stay committed or focused like I need to.  SO, with all that said, I've joined this site, so see if my blogging about all of my emotions, helps me handle going to eat something eveytime I feel some sort of emotion better.  That's what I am....an emotional eater.  I honestly have never been able to fully grasp that, accept it, or even say it, until now.  I'm determined to make 2011 the best possible year and the start of a new and healthy life for me!  I'm starting school again this summer and I want to go in with the confidence and angry free life that I deserve.  I'm tired of feeling bitter, sad, depressed, angry, sorry for myself and joyless!  Here's to a better year and a road to a healthy life!