I've missed you all so much! It has been a very stressful past couple weeks for our household. My little baby boy (6 months) has been in the hospital for RSV and pnuemonia! Funny that I always thought they were basicaly the same thing. They aren't, trust me! Seems that every baby in our area has come down with this horrible cold . I feel so bad for my little man . I know he's miserable.
Needless to say, diet hasn't gone all that great since I've been barely eating anything with the added stress. Move went well and you can never eat right when you're in the middle of so much "crap" LOL! I hope everyone is doing well. Especially those of my F.I.T girls! I'm so sorry I've dissapeared on all of you :( I promise I'll make it up to you!
I don't have tons of time left right now but I super promise that I will be back soon! I should have net hooked up at my new house before the first week in Feb is up. If I haven't made any new posts before then! XOXO
So I tried to update my blog images and for some reason it's not working. Hmm....probably a problem with the surver again. How frustrating. This site has a lot of technical difficulties for some damn reason.
Anywho, we are going to be moving tomorrow into our new apartment so I'm super excited about that! I'm hoping that MAYBE we'll have enough finances to go ahead and get my net hooked up at the same place! That would make me very happy! So if you keep coming back to finding that I haven't made a new blog entry in a few days that you'll understand why. Moving is a pretty hectic time for anyone let alone with two kids in tow right? LOL!
How was everyones New Years? I hope we all made it home safe! We had a horrible "white out" snow storm here so I was super worried about my BIL and future SIL who were out that night with their young son. It was horrible! They elected to stay at the persons house they were visiting thank goodness! Rather than trying to make it home in that crap! I hope everyone at FIT is off to a rolling start on the NY Challenge! I haven't gotten a chance to get everyones starting weights wrote down so no one erase theirs lol! I hope to back on here full force by next week! Moving to a new town, even if it's one we've lived in before, always makes it more stressful. I have to get new library cards for us all which means it could be a few days before I'm able to get on there even. We'll see how it all pans out!
I know I shouldn't have done it but I couldn't help it. That dang scale was just staring at me from under the towel cabinet this morning as I took my habitual relief this morning (if you follow ) . I just had to strip down and jump on. And guess what it said?? 245!!! I am so excited! My personal "mini goal" for January is to be down to 240 by January 31st. Are there 31 days in Jan? Anywho- you know what I mean !
I've been taking my water pills again habitualy every morning when I wake up. I'm kinda embarressed to say that yesterday I only got my calories up to something like 800! I ate 3 meals and still I couldn't get that number higher! So I had a little snack later that evening of a peanut butter sandwich. DH knows how much peanut butter to allow me, so I let him make it because I know I'll cheat! LOL!
Went to the gym last night and got myself back up to a run again! I'm so proud of myself ! I know it may be a stretch now to keep myself running for the full time but I know that eventually it will get easier everyday if I just keep doing what I'm doing! I'm doing 50 reps at 60lbs on the ab machine. DH is just doing them the "normal" way (as he calls it) on a bench. Well woohoo for him right? LOL! He's trying to get me to do them and while I agree that they are more beneficial than using a machine IMO, I just can't do crunches that way. Not because of any kneck or shoulder, back, pain etc..but because it bothers my incision site from my multiple operations when I had my son. It always feels like it's going to rip open and since I had a tubal at the same time I don't want to "undue" anything if you know what I mean .
So how is everyone doing? Make sure all you girls from F.I.T get me your "New Years Challenge" goals before Tuesday. Actually better make that for ASAP. I cannot get online for the rest of the week until Wed which will be the 2nd! I will post a challenge for Jan 1st and I would like everyone to post their beginning weights in the appropriate thread on that day! Thanks a bunch girls!! I'm off to visit all your blogs!!
I will be back to post a good blog entry tomorrow morning around 9 am! So any of you from FIT that can make it on feel free to come join me! I just have so much going on today and I've got to get home and make dinner and eat before 4pm because we have got to get to the gym before 4!! YIKES and it's already almost 3:30! I'll never do it but we'll see! In the mean time CONGRATS TO BRELEE ON MAKING IT TO ONDERLAND!!! Skinny vibes going out to all of you!!! Stop by tomorrow afternoon if you can and check out my blog! It will be updated for ya'll by then!
I CAN'T BELIEVE I FINALLY DID IT! I broke the 240s! YaY for me! I have been taking a water pill for a little under a week now and it has really paid off for me. I have found that when I don't take one, I use the potty MAYBE once a day. I had no idea how prone I was to holding water. I think that I may also (among the 30 other things) talk to my doc about a water pill or maybe he will suggest an OTC one. I've seen them advertised as well.
The gym has been closed over the holidays so tonight when they open again needless to say, DH and I will be the first ones there! We spent Christmas with the inlaws and it was difficult to stay away from my MILs cooking! That woman can cook so mean stuffing (my weakness). Thank GOD she didn't cook any cheese cake or I would have been damned! But over all thru the course of the weekend I think I did a pretty good job. Maybe I didn't stay stricly in my calorie limit but pretty close I bet. It's interesting to note that when thedailyplate.com told me to consume 1900 calories a day for a 2lb weight loss a week. I certainly lost those 2lbs! So maybe it's worth giving it another weeks trial huh? LOL!
Anywho- we called the landlord over in Hannibal today and he said that the apt is ready to go and it's OURS!! I was so excited!!!! We are finally going to get out of my gmas house!! Yay for us! That's one dang resolution off the charts! Can't wait to get to the rest! So while I'm waiting for my net and pc and all to get hooked up I might be absent for a few days following our move in the 2nd week of Jan but after that I'll be on full time and I mean FULL TIME!! I love the net a little too much probably! But I certainly won't let it interfere with my gym work outs and work in general obviously but I'll be able to stay a little more up to date with everyone! Can't wait to get this new years challenge underway! I have until the end of January to meet my own personal goal to be 240. So wish me luck! I think I'm on the right path!
And of course all of my readers! I look forward each & every day to coming to the library and spending the best two hours of my day on EP . So now that I've buttered ya'll up you can hear about how my day went yesterday.
I wasn't the best girl in the country but I did do alright. NOT! So I had my usual oatmeal for breakfast. Nothing new there. Then I came here and when I got home I decided that enough time had passed between meals that I could have some lunch. Well "lunch" turned into a big 'ol bowl of Stagg Chili. Which is 300 calories a cup mind you. And I had 2 cups! So that's 600 right there alone! Then for supper Jayson just HAD TO have tacos. Homemade but that doesn't make it much healthier! Just the taco meat and sauce with shell ALONE was like 380 calories. Then when I checked the calories on the cheese I had just consumed I could have cried .. I must have consumed at least 900 calories on two tacos last night!
So I def decided to haul my ass to the gym no questions asked! And guess what? Jayson and I played a game of one on one in the basketball court and then I ran for 10 mins on the treadmill. Now 10 doesn't sound like a lot to those of your sprinter track stars but lemme tell ya 10 is MONDO for me! I have asthma that NEVER acts up except when I run. So that was a major accomplishment. Hopefully I'll be able to get myself up to a full hour of running! How cool would that be right? I'm going to do it girls I promise you that by the end of January I WILL be on Phen! If I have to drive to another state to find a doc to give it to me I will get it! I'm like a druggy now I need my fix lol!
Grandma gave me a water pill yesterday and I must have peed all the available liquid out! I went like 15 times! The she asked if I felt better or if I thought I needed more. So I decided to take one more for just one more day. Maybe that will help me get rid of this water weight I'm lugging around. Sooo after two full days of taking this pill I'll weigh myself. I was going to do it today, but I thought better of it. I'll do it tomorrow morning first thing. Also ladies, DH has promised me that once we get moved to Hannibal he'll get my net hooked back up at the house . Then I'll be driving ya'll nuts with posts! I have a laptop so I tend to be on it no matter what I am doing thru the day. I've had that dang thing sitting on the dryer while I'm doing laundry before .
Ok so away I go for the day. I hope that I can keep my cool on calories today. I already have to pee again FYI so maybe I AM losing some good water weight. Wish me luck that I see a smaller number tomorrow!
I have NOT been a good girl this week so far. I can't seem to get my binging under control. I haven't been to the gym one time except Monday I think. I just don't want to go after eating supper. I know so I should go earlier in the day right? Well I would if there was child care. It's absolutely infuriating to me. I tell you exactly why I don't want to go. It's because I don't want to go thru the hustle and bustle of the gym in the evening. It's murder to go there with over 100 ppl all trying to use the same equipment. Madness is a good word for it. This town needs more than one gym I can tell you that much!
So on top of that I haven't been watching my calories at all. I always start the day out great and then I end it on a super sour note. I wonder if I am just always meant to be fat? Argh! I'm just obsessing with this fear that my doctor is going to tell me no when I talk to him about a weight drug. I am obsessing to the point of keeping me up at night. I know normal people don't do this but I never claimed to be normal lol. I have some serious anxiety problems that I need to get sorted out as well. I'm just a mess right now. I've got so much going on and sometimes it just seems like it's all too much to deal with right now. I feel exactly like those people on the biggest loser. It's like "enough is enough". I'm driving myself crazy obsessing over it. I am absolutely convinced that when we get settled down and drama starts ironing itself out in our lives that things will get better with this whole binging situation.
Ok so hopefully everyone has a plan for the holiday feasting? Mine won't be hard because we are going to the inlaws for a little party. Well my inlaws are all enormously over weight so it's easy for me to impress them all by saying "no thank you, I don't eat junk food". They all look at me in awe. Not to mention the murdering looks I get from the SIL over that comment. This girl takes binging to a whole new level. Lemme tell ya. I know I'm fat and I shouldn't talk like that but the difference is, I'm fat and I know it. Knowing it, is the key here lol! If there is one thing I can't stand it's fat girls who wear NO clothes bc they think they are hot. I mean, girls, if you are built like a tank, don't wear the top! Am I right?
Ok so everyone have a very productive day and I'm going to TRY to get to the gym this afternoon before the evening rush gets there! Thanks for the kick in the butt girls!!! Wubs ya!!!
*edit* I'm also going to weigh in tomorrow morning just to see what this week has cost me so far - wish me luck*
Didn't go so well at all. I had a major case of the binges . It all started innocently enough. I had a 100 calorie pack while watching the biggest loser finale. Well, then it escalated to about 3 100 calorie packs and about 12 pizza rolls . I was so dissapointed in myself. On top of that I had 2nd helpings of stir fry at dinner WITH rice. Ugh!!! I talked myself out of going to the gym because I was feeling "nauseous". Which was ridiculous. I was feeling a tad ill but it went away soon enough. I just didn't want to go, and I knew it was an excuse that Jayson would let me get away with . Then I told myself that I would get up and go at 5am this morning. Well the alarm went off and so did I, right back off to sleep. I didn't even get up at 8 like usual. I slept until like 12:30!! I'm so frustrated with myself. I hate going to the gym at night because there is nowhere to work out with all the people there. So I talk myself out of going all together. I hate that! Jayson and I had this perfect plan last night. I would start going at 5am in the morning when they first open and he would go during the noon hour when they are empty there as well. It sounded like a great plan. All except the "me getting up at 4am" part. Otherwise I could have lived with it.
I promise myself that I'm going to be good....tomorrow. Well hey what do you want, my gma made yummy potatoe salad! I can't pass up potato salad and I CAN'T eat just a little. I'd go crazy! I love that stuff! I adore potatoe salad. I told Jay that when we get moved out on our own again, I'm going to investigate healthy ways to make my fav. food. Like potatoe salad. . But I promise that tomorrow I am all about business! I still have until the end of January to meet my 10lb loss goal. I have lost 4lbs to date so I have 6 left to go! I can do 6! No problem! I even had my gma give me a couple water pills so I could lose this water weight that is causing my fingers to swell up. Maybe that would help me drop a few extra pounds ya think? Just an idea . Well I guess I'll get off of here for now! How are all of you doing on your daily struggles? Do you have an eating disorder as well? Sucks doesn't it? Good Lord willing next payday I'll get mine under control a little more with the help of some pills lol! Sounds bad doesn't it? LOL! Who cares! When you need the help, you need it!
I know I've ased before but there is something seriously wrong with these headphones here at the library. I can't hear anything thru them so if someone would be so kind as to let me know if they can hear my music, I'd sincerely appreciate it
. I feel so bad for my little man 
. I know he's miserable. 
I know I shouldn't have done it but I couldn't help it. That dang scale was just staring at me from under the towel cabinet this morning as I took my habitual relief this morning (if you follow 
) . I just had to strip down and jump on. And guess what it said?? 245!!! I am so excited! My personal "mini goal" for January is to be down to 240 by January 31st. Are there 31 days in Jan? Anywho- you know what I mean 
!
. 
I look forward each & every day to coming to the library and spending the best two hours of my day on EP 
. I was so dissapointed in myself. On top of that I had 2nd helpings of stir fry at dinner WITH rice. Ugh!!! I talked myself out of going to the gym because I was feeling "nauseous". Which was ridiculous. I was feeling a tad ill but it went away soon enough. I just didn't want to go, and I knew it was an excuse that Jayson would let me get away with 
. But I promise that tomorrow I am all about business! I still have until the end of January to meet my 10lb loss goal. I have lost 4lbs to date so I have 6 left to go! I can do 6! No problem! I even had my gma give me a couple water pills so I could lose this water weight that is causing my fingers to swell up. Maybe that would help me drop a few extra pounds ya think? Just an idea 
. Well I guess I'll get off of here for now! How are all of you doing on your daily struggles? Do you have an eating disorder as well? Sucks doesn't it? Good Lord willing next payday I'll get mine under control a little more with the help of some pills lol! Sounds bad doesn't it? LOL! Who cares! When you need the help, you need it!