I got pretty upset and disapointed with myself over my small gain on Sunday. For those of you that don't know-Sunday is my "official WI day". I don't weigh in everyday or even close to every other day. I weigh in once a week and sometimes (rarely) I cheat and weigh in a couple days early just to see where I'm at. On Thursday (I think it was) I weighed in at 249-250. Then on Sunday it had jumped from that to 254! I was very upset! Then I called a friend of mine who was told by her doc to NEVER weigh in at night. He told her to weigh in the morning after relieving yourself for the first time lol. So I tried that this morning, and low and behold, I dropped the 4lbs again!! So I guess it was all built up bowel or water lol. Sorry but there is no nice way to put that !
Went to the gym last night. Dh and I decided that we weren't going to go at night anymore like that because there is absolultely NO PLACE to work out! There was a ton of like 10-13 year olds in there doing absolutely nothing but screwing around and taking up machines . There was virtually no place for those of us who are there for a reason to work out. It was frustrating. I don't think they should be allowed in there at all. The gym coordinator said that the Y is trying to promote child health and wellbeing. Well ya know what, if promoting that means the destruction of their property than so be it. Who am I to tell them they are wrong right? It just irritated me that us adults couldn't get in and get a good work out because of all these children. This is the Y, there are all kinds of places for those kids to play besides the work out room!
After reading a very close EP buddies blog yesterday I have been made thoroughly green with envy lol! She is on a diet aid as well as WW. Now I've been wanting to get on WW for quite some time and have always found one excuse or another to not join. I've wanted to get on phen for awhile, but have always found one excuse or another not to call the doctor. I'm affraid they are going to tell me no actually. I guess the only way I'm ever going to find out is by calling and making an appointment right? The worse he can do is tell me no. If you've been up to date on my blogs, then you know I get discouraged easily. It's like all it takes is 1 "no" and I'll give up completley. I know that I need help with this. I can't do it all on my own. I've tried and I fail everytime. I think that phen could really help me. Those of you who read everyday are probably about ready to reach thru the screen and slap me lol! The way I am forever talking about joining WW and calling my doctor . But yet I never seem to manage to get either done . So when I make my post one day saying that I got both done ya'll are going to flip! LOL!
Ok so there is nothing much else going on today. Just was happy to report that I saw the 250 again today . I've seen it twice so that means it's mine and I'm claiming it!
I am so unbelievably pissed right now! I thought I was doing so good! I weighed in yesterday night which is my usualy WI day. I was expecting to see about 249 or less. What did I see? My 254 was back! I can't believe that! So what did I do? I binged of course! What does any binge eater do when they gain back weight they thought they were losing? They eat! They say "F*%# it!" and eat. I hate that I did that. I should have waited until this morning and weighed in again. That would have been the smart thing to do but I've never been accused of being overly smart lol.
So how to get up from here. I'm so depressed about this! I haven't done anything differently. I have been working out faithfully and even built up my cardio to a great speed and incline. I've increased my cardio from 30 mins a day to an hour. So what's the deal? I haven't gone over on my calories. I've been doing really good. Some of the stuff I've been eating for the last COUPLE days meaning like 2 haven't been the healthiest choices so maybe that's to blame. Who knows? I even worked myself up to 80 oz of water a day. I'm going to WI once more when I get home and see where I'm at officially for the start of my 5th week. Maybe I'll be back down to 250. That would be nice and then I'd feel like a total ass for getting upset and eating those two hot dogs last night lol. maybe....
My downfall, now this may not apply to everyone, but my downfall is the not knowing aspect of it. It's when I eat things that I have no possible way of knowing how many calories are in it. So I guess. And I probably guess waaay off the mark, because I never seem to think there are as many calories in things as what there are in reality. Makeing any sense yet? For example, last night we had homemade noodles with beef tips and gravy. As well as homemade rolls. I figured the entire amount I ate probably came up to around 700 calories when in reality it was probably more like 1200 ! I need to eat pre packaged food with very specific amounts of calories and fat in them. Clearly labeled on the box so I know exactly what I'm putting in my body. Like I said, doesn't work for everyone I"m sure but I know that's what I need to do to keep my calories in check. Must work for some people because Jenny Craig and Nutrisystem sure are making a butt load off of their prepackaged food. And even WW has started selling packaged stuff with their name on it.
Anywho, I hope that this week goes a lot better in the way of weight loss. I have to head to the gym again tonight after munchkin gets out of school. I'm going to chill on the cardio today and do more weights. I know cardio is good for you too but I think your body can get accustomed to you doing the same thing all the time and come to a stand still on your weight loss. Talk to ya'll later!
I've actually managed to post everyday this week!! Not that I've had a lot to say in some cases but that's ok. The important thing is that I'm sticking with it. Everyday that I've said I wasn't going to be able to post, I've managed to make it. Even on Friday when I THOUGHT that the library was going to be closed. I happened to be driving by and it was open so happy day! Unfortunatly tomorrow (Sunday) they really are closed . They are always closed on Sundays. Oh well!
So how has everyones week gone on a whole? Try anything new this week? I have tried getting to 1990 cals these past couple days and it's a little more difficult than you'd think. But I do have some good news to wrap up my week. Not only have I made it to a full hour this week on the treadmill, I've managed to work my way up to 3.0mph at a 5% incline!!! I'm so proud of myself. Of course right now I'm only able to do it in spurts. I walk at 3.0 and at 2% for 10 mins and then for 5 mins I walk at 5%. So I guess the technical name for that is intervals lol! Either way, I feel pretty damn good about it! I did cheat a bit last night by cooking fries with my chilli dogs. Because you know what came next....yup chili on the fries . I figure I ate probably close to 700-800 cals in that meal so that's not too good. I didn't blow my caloric limit, but it's just not all in all a very healthy thing to eat period!
Ok so my week ended on a good note . I even lost 3lbs this week !! YaY for me!!! Now on to the next week!!! Good luck everyone!
I can't hear the music I've added to my blog . I've changed it 2 or 3 times thinking that maybe it was just this sites music file but I still can't hear it.
So on to my good news! After returning from the gym last night I decided to hop in the shower and get in a good WI a couple days early. Since Sunday is supposed to be my official WI. But who cares, I decided to cheat lol! I was astonished to see the # at 250!! It was fluxuating between 249 and 250 so yay for me!! I am so excited! I know it's water weight but again, who cares?! I have worked so hard at the gym this week and I've really been kicking my arse to stay with my diet so I've earned a few marks off the scale I think!
Hubby weighed in at gaining a pound but I think his is muscle mostly because he does work his butt off on those weights! Poor guy! He started taking it out on the scale, swearing that the scale was wrong lol. Haven't we all done that? He said he weighed himself at the gym and it said he was at 178 and this one at home says 180 so it must be wrong. I told him that he should always use the same scale when doing official WIs because scales will differ somewhat. From one to the other. I think we are going to invest in a top dollar scale from walmart or some such place. Isn't it funny that I'm willing to pay so much for a piece of machinery thats just going to tell me I'm fat? LOL! Maybe next I'll get a talking one so the whole house can hear it tell me I'm fat!
We thought about breaking out our swimsuits from the storage shed and taking a swim tonight at the gym instead of the treadmill. Water aerobics can be VERY helpfull and also a huge de stresser lol. I love to swim and so does the rest of the family. I think we might just give it a shot. I hate to get in the pool and get all wet and then be trying to make it to the car without catching pnuemonia in this 30 degree weather, kwim?
We are moving to Hannibal at the beginning of the new year so that means big changes for us. On one hand I am relieved and happy to finally be out from under my grandmother (read past entries, if you don't know that story). On the other hand, I'm not looking forward to change. That's some drastic changes! I mean Alex loves her preschool here, and we DID just get going at this brand spankin new gym they have here. They have a ymca in Hannibal as well even my bils are members of that one so dh would have someone to work out with. But it's just the sentimental point of view I guess. We've lived here for almost 5 years. And now to just move away from it all? It's one of the things I was contemplating while at the gym yesterday. I told ya it's a stress relief .
My anxiety is thru the roof as usual. If you've ever been worried about something, you understand that pit you get in your stomach. Sometimes it's enough to give you a headache. Imagine having that all the time. Imagine it never going away, no matter what you do. And having money, such as on payday, it only grows in comparison. Grows so much you can hardly stand to eat or drink anything. Your anxiety cramps your brain full of so much worry that you can't even bare to cram another thought into it? That's me any day of the week. Doesn't sound right does it? I think that it may have something to do with my eating disorder. I think I would notice a huge difference in my weight and eating patterns if I was to get on some kind of anxiety medication or something of that sort. What do ya'll think? I'm going to talk to my doc about it as soon as we get moved. It would be nice to not have this constant feeling or constant pit in my stomach. Anxiety to me is just another word for obsessive worrying. And I have that x3 at least! I worry about everything and yes, sometimes it is silly things. I can't seem to help it. Maybe I should look into some counceling as well ya think?
Well I think I've bent your ear enough for today! LOL! Keep me in your prayers and I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend! I don't get down town on the weekends so no library for me. That's about my norm though! When I get my laptop then I'm on a lot more so we'll see what the new year brings! If you haven't been to my support board "fit" yet. Go check it out!!
A very trusted EP buddie of mine tells me to go to a website that can calculate how many calories a day I need to be consuming to achieve the weight loss I want. I enter all my info along with my activity level and it tells me to eat at least 1990 cals a day! That seems like a lot to me. I'm sure I ate more than that to get as heavy as I am today but that just doesn't sound right? My pt told me that as long as I eat healthy and keep my metabolism up that my body will burn off any calories I consume. He also recommended that I eat around 1200-1500 cals a day max. I don't seem to be losing much on 1200-1500 a day so maybe I should try eating a little more to increase my metabolism more. What do ya'll think? I mean eating mroe healthy things obviously. It doesn't mean that I'm going to go scarf down a snickers everyday to make up for my caloric count lol! Although that does sound nice doesn't it? LOL!
So anyway, not sure if I'll get over here tomorrow. As you all know, I am currently at the mercy of the library computer and unfortunatly they are not going to be open tomorrow :( So if I am not, I shall return to harrass you more on the Monday next! Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend!!
I swear if it wasn't for the bright idea to make peanut butter cookies, I'd of done fine yesterday. Instead I totaly blew my diet by at least 1000 calories. I'm up to at least 1800 already and I still have dinner to go. Totally bummed about that. But all I can do is move on right? Just count it and move on. *sigh* At least I got in a good long work out at the gym last night! I stayed on that dang treadmill for 60 mins! I was so proud of myself! After that I went and got in a good bit of strength training. I was sweating so much! Ya know, sometimes nothing can make it feel more worth it than a good drenching sweat. I mean, how would you feel if you just got off the treadmill after jogging for 3 hrs and didn't even break a sweat?! That would make me feel like I hadn't done anything lol!
Weight in day is gettting ever closer. Sunday is my official weigh in day for now. Soon as I join WW next month it will be on Thursdays I do believe. So all of that will change. Well rockers, not much else to report today. So far things are going well. I had my usual breakfast of oatmeal and coffee lol. I'll go ahead and type up my meal plan from yesterday so you can see for yourself how I did Don't judge too harshly
12:30 - 1 cup tuna casserole = 500 cals ; about 7 peanut butter cookies = 150 cals a piece total = ext 1050
6:30 - 1 Lean Cuisine dinner = 420 cals ( i think, threw the box away after looking and have sence forgotten) 2 small salads with ranch = about 90 cals
I think I figured it out for those of you who recieved invites from me for my support group. All you have to do is click on "join this group". You'll then have to submit a request to join. I will approve your request and then everything is just honkey dorey lol! Hope there are no more problems..!!!
Well it didn't go as well as I had planned with my new support group. Seems no one can get in . I've emailed a couple different people to see if anyone can tell me what to do differently. So I hope that will shed some light on the situation. I want to keep it a private board between me and selected other EP members. I'll figure it out! Never fear!
Yesterdays diet plan went great! I am so proud of myself for sticking to it! I went to bed earlier than I have in weeks, maybe months! I set my alarm for 8 and I actually managed to get my booty out of bed at that time! I let a little more time go in between my eating than I should have but I def stuck to my caloric limits ! How great is that? DH and I even made it to the gym yesterday night! I only did 20 mins of cardio and only about 15 of strength training but we were strapped for time, because we got a late start. But I went right? That's the bottom line. Anything is better than nothing at all!
Today has gone good so far. It only just started, but I haven't screwed up or cheated yet thank goodness! I had my usual oatmeal prepared with milk for breakfast. Which is only 400 cals and loaded with fiber which is good for me! It also have a ton of carbs which isn't so good, but on the upside, it def gives me enough energy for the day! I had a cup of coffee and have switched back to splenda which is far better than sugar lol! After that I drink water for the rest of the day. I doubt I'll make it back up to gallon over night but I hope I'll get close!
After Alex gets out of school today at 3:30 we are headed to the gym for an earlier work out. I think we are waiting until too late at night (after supper) and then we only have an hour or so before child care ends. It starts at 4pm and ends at 8. With Alex getting out of school at 3:30 we can shoot over there and have quite a bit of time to work out before we head home for dinner. Then I'll have enough time to get in all of the baths and laundry before bed. This is going to be out new routine. Instead of going to the library while Alex is at school, I'm going to come here in the morning straight after breakfast and then while she's in school I'll stay home and look after the baby. Until we get moved out anyway. Then I'll have my gma watch him while we go to the gym during her school hours (they don't have child care during those hours :()
Well, I guess that's about it for now! I hope everyone is doing great on their diet! Let me know how your weigh ins go!! And if any of you have any idea how to help me with my dilemma with my EP support board please don't hesitate to contact me!
If you can't tell, I'm super excited! I finally got my membership to go thru! I also started my support board as well! Yell at me for details if you would like to join! Right now it's for women only (sorry fellas). Also, it's a serious board ladies. If you aren't sure you are serious about losing weight than I'm sorry for ya lol!
Anywho, I'm super excited about getting all of this off the ground! I know that the ladies I chat with on EP are excellent support systems and I don't know where I'd be without ya ladies! Probably 20lbs heavier lol!
SBD is not going well. I basicaly just paying more attn to how many calories (and what types) I put in my mouth. I think that is the most important thing I can do. My support sytem is still in the dumps. I'm so sick of the comments that my gma will make about all of our eating habits. It drives me nuts! Family is supposed to be your #1 fan. Not treat you like you are an alien just because you weigh more! It's ridiculous! She is always making comments about my 5 y/o , my husband and myself! I'm ready to scream! Argh!
Stress is not good for people struggling with weight issues. Because as we all know, stress makes us eat eat eat! I'll do great all the way up until the rest of the house goes to bed and then I cave and go back for that piece of cake or that extra biscuit. :(( I don't know what to do! I think after giving it a couple months thought that WW really would be the best diet for me. I can eat basicaly whatever I want as long as I keep to a certain point value. Which comes up to a certain about of calories a day. I think I can handle that much better! I'm willing to try anythying at this point. I know I've been saying I'm going to join WW for quite sometime and I always back out at the last moment but this time I think I will! LOL! I'm good with my thinking! LMAO!
Well keep the faith ya'll! Remember to get at me if you want details for my board and you didn't recieve a personal invite from me :))
I checked my email today to see if my paypal went thru yet for my gold membership. I did recieve an email saying that my bank declined the payment. So I call my bank to see what's going on and they told me that they don't allow their patrons to buy thru paypal anymore. I was like WHAT?! Who are they to decide how I spend my own damn money?! I was pissed! So I'm just going to buy a green dot card and transfer funds that way lol! Screw them!
As far as weight loss goes, I'm starting a whole new day so that's the way I view it. It's well past time to get over this hump I'm on. I'm tired of sitting around and feeling sorry for myself! It's time to get a move on! Last night, Jayson wanted to go to the gym. My gma was like, "you don't have gas to drive to the gym!" .. I mean we are on 3/4 of a tank and the gym is roughly 4 blocks away! And what business is it of hers anyway? I'm really getting tired of this so called support system of mine! She accused dh of getting up 4 times last night to rumage thru the fridge. Then says " it's no wonder you and your wife are so fat!". And for the record....dh is NOT fat! Also, it wasn't him that was up 4 times last night! I got up ONE time to wash the makeup off my face and then I drank a glass of milk and that's it! Then I went back to bed! I have no idea where she is getting all of this from but I'm really sick of it! Dh is ready to tear her head off. She thinks that just because we have come across hard times and are forced to stay with her for a view weeks that she has the right to treat us anyway she wants. I think her and I are going to sit down and have a chat about what is and is not acceptable!
Sorry to get off topic there! Just had to get that off of my chest. I wonder if I should seek some counceling lol! Anywho, I'm going to make the rounds to check up on all of my EP buddies! Hope ya'll are having a wonderful week!
I got pretty upset and disapointed with myself over my small gain on Sunday. For those of you that don't know-Sunday is my "official WI day". I don't weigh in everyday or even close to every other day. I weigh in once a week and sometimes (rarely) I cheat and weigh in a couple days early just to see where I'm at. On Thursday (I think it was) I weighed in at 249-250. Then on Sunday it had jumped from that to 254! I was very upset! 
Then I called a friend of mine who was told by her doc to NEVER weigh in at night. He told her to weigh in the morning after relieving yourself for the first time lol. So I tried that this morning, and low and behold, I dropped the 4lbs again!! 
So I guess it was all built up bowel or water lol. Sorry but there is no nice way to put that 
. So when I make my post one day saying that I got both done ya'll are going to flip! LOL!
I'm so depressed about this! I haven't done anything differently. I have been working out faithfully and even built up my cardio to a great speed and incline. I've increased my cardio from 30 mins a day to an hour. So what's the deal? I haven't gone over on my calories. I've been doing really good. Some of the stuff I've been eating for the last COUPLE days meaning like 2 haven't been the healthiest choices so maybe that's to blame. Who knows? I even worked myself up to 80 oz of water a day. I'm going to WI once more when I get home and see where I'm at officially for the start of my 5th week. Maybe I'll be back down to 250. That would be nice and then I'd feel like a total ass for getting upset and eating those two hot dogs last night lol. maybe....
. They are always closed on Sundays. Oh well! 
. I even lost 3lbs this week 
!! YaY for me!!! Now on to the next week!!! Good luck everyone!
He said he weighed himself at the gym and it said he was at 178 and this one at home says 180 so it must be wrong. I told him that he should always use the same scale when doing official WIs because scales will differ somewhat. From one to the other. I think we are going to invest in a top dollar scale from walmart or some such place. Isn't it funny that I'm willing to pay so much for a piece of machinery thats just going to tell me I'm fat? LOL! Maybe next I'll get a talking one so the whole house can hear it tell me I'm fat! 