Report for the week
I've been about 90% on plan this week, so that's a big yay. I'm still stumbling a bit, but it has not been too bad. It is really annoying that I have to share a fridge with my two housemates (and they really like beer, a LOT!) so there isn't room for me to stock up on meat and cheese as much as I did before. I'll pretty much have to shop for groceries every week. Which is okay, I'm just used to going crazy at Sam's Club once a month, sealing everything I don't cook up that night, and using it gradually for a few weeks.
I'm also sad because I discovered that TastyKake makes sugar free snack cakes that are pretty low in carbs, but my grocery store has not restocked that section of the snack cake aisle. :( I hope they're still making them!
First food log in forever
I spent all of Friday evening cooking stuff for my next four days at work, so hopefully I will stay on plan. I've been good so far, except I was totally craving Doritos (aie, workstress) so I did succumb. Otherwise I'm happy with my food choices today. Need to drink more water though.
turkey w/taco seasoning and some cheese - 1 carb
1 bag Doritos - 30 carbs
meatloaf - 1.5 carbs
ground beef w/ taco seasonings and a little cheese - 1 carb
Back again, again, again
Restart #783 is about to begin. I have a few days of food made up, it's just time for me to try again. Work has been just stupidly insane. They got rid of 80% of our staff. So I have been deep in comfort food territory from the intense stress. I have been weaning myself a bit; it's been about a week since having any fast food, and honestly I already feel better just from that. Low carb started tonight, except for a bag of microwave popcorn. I love popcorn, and I didn't want to throw it out. I'll have another tomorrow night, then it's on.
I got one of the old Stillman's books from back in the 1970s, from bookmooch.com. It's pretty funny how different weight loss literature has changed since then. His book is all about blaming all the problems in life on weight: "Oh, you eat because your husband neglects you? He's only neglecting you because you're fat, so lose some weight, here's how..." Still, it's a good resource for me to have, because I had my best success when I was basically doing Stillman's (it's low carb low fat, mostly meat, no added fats at all), so that's where I'm trying to head again. I know I'll get there again someday.
No scale for me now. It's just too big a step right now. I don't want to discourage myself before I even begin.
Not a tremendous amount of weight loss so far. I've been maybe 90% on plan, but life has been stressful, work is making me crazy, and boy stuff makes me crazy too. I'm cheating some for dinner tonight, though it isn't as bad as it could be. I worked overtime and was oncall last week, and tonight is the first day of my "weekend" and I just want a treat. Having mac and cheese, sweet peas, chicken cordon bleu, carbsmart ice cream, and probably popcorn later on tonight.
People in the navy don't dress like this
Had a slip up on Wednesday, due to a combination of being mostly out of food at home, not sleeping when I should have, not eating enough, needing to run errands, and ending up tremendously overwhelmingly hungry. I hit a drive-thru and got bad stuff. On the plus side, I read some nutritional info, and now I have a better fallback plan if it happens again. It's not a great fallback plan, it's certainly not ON-PLAN, but it's better than other alternatives.
I have been on-plan otherwise. I didn't even cheat at the movies today (though if we'd gone out for dinner afterwards, I would have. I go off-plan for dates and potential dates...still not sure which one today was, but I think it was one of them.) Before work Friday night I cooked up meals for the next few days, going easier on the cheese this time. Cheese is my downfall.
I've been buying clothes from Old Navy. I swore I would never do this because I HATE HATE HATE their commercials, but their online women's section actually has a pretty wide size range, and I like their stuff. Plus their sizes skew big. I'm so used to Lane Bryant's sizing that I bought all 28s and 30s from ON online (sometimes LB 28s are a bit tight these days), but they're all huge on me, and I'm a 26 or maybe a touch smaller with them right now.
Still going strong and feeling good. No weight loss yet. I haven't been counting carb grams, I've just been eating stuff I know to be okay. For now I'm eating cheese, but in another week or two, when I feel like I'm back in the swing of things, I'm going to cut that down some. Also going to try to drink two liters of water a day. I'm not sure if that is enough really, but we'll see.
Finally did it
I was trying to be extra-generous to myself and psyched myself up to be prepared to see 310 on the scale. I thought that would give me a ton of cushion room. Turns out it was almost on the mark. It's cool, I'm not mad, it's just the starting point for round two.
My stomach feels a little weird, and I'm probably a little on the grumpy side, but otherwise no serious induction symptoms yet. It's only day 2 though.
Starting again I hope
I'm ready to go. I made a bunch of lunches and dinners for me the other day, I have some lc snacks, the only thing I didn't do was weigh myself today. Oops. I'm really excited to get going again. I bought a bunch of bento lunch boxes and supplies for them. Had my old standby of mexican-seasoned beef with some cheddar on top for dinner tonight before work, mmmmm, man that was good stuff.
I realized that half of the posts I've made here have been about how I've fallen off the wagon. I suppose the challenge is to keep getting back on again.
I'm going to get back on program. Honest.
In a way, I'm not sure what is holding me back. When I was doing very strict low-carb, practically Stillman's level of low carb which is about nil grams of carbs, I felt FANTASTIC, mentally and physically. I felt confident and if not beautiful at least pretty and on the right track. And I liked the food too. I don't know why I am having such problems getting back to that. I've been in Virginia for two months now, I think it ought to be time for me to stop with the excuses and get back on the wagon.
Not only am I eating crap, but I'm eating expensive crap. Once I get back into the swing of taking lunches to work and cooking more for myself, I'll stop with the garbage fast food and tv dinners, and eat normal good stuff again. Man, I went most of 2007 without touching fast food...
Well, it's been a while
I have basically been complete off program due to MASSIVE LIFE CHANGES for the past several weeks. My job was transferred from Michigan to Virginia, so I moved. I have never moved so far before, and it has been overwhelminly stressful. I do like the people I work with down here, but apart from my roommates, and two friends I have up in Maryland (an hour drive away) I basically don't know anybody down here. Another complication is that one of my roommates is a coworker I've had serious romantic feelings toward for like YEARS, so it is hard to be so close to him when he is not interested in me in that way. At least, I'm fairly sure he isn't, because he hasn't made any moves to pursue me, and he's not one of those really shy guys who wouldn't. I don't see how I could possibly be so Overwhelmingly Intimidating to men, but I've heard this before from various sources. I have no idea why, because seriously, I'll go out with pretty much anybody who shows the slightest bit of interest in me.
Weight-wise, I've definitely gained. I have stayed away from the scale because I know it will just depress me, but I'm pretty solidly a size 28 right now. Still an improvement from where I started, though at my lowest, my 26s were starting to get loose. I purged a TON of clothes before my move, donating the stuff that was still in good condition to the Salvation Army. I know places like that have a hard time getting large sized clothing, so hopefully they'll be able to put it to good use.
Yesterday I bought some groceries to bridge me over into induction. I still have some carby stuff to use up, because I hate tossing food, but I expect that in three or four days, I'll be back on-plan. The only food I brought with me from Michigan was a container of Carbquick mix, because that stuff is WAY too expensive to throw away.
Anyway, that's it for now. Will be back with the regular posting very soon, I hope.