Well, I made it to Friday - yippee! This has been a long, long week.
My weight loss has been moving along again. I am down something like 11 pounds in 18 days. Emma Bella, you're right! I am SO close to finally being below 300#! I don't remember the last time I was there. That's what I'm focusing on. I feel better about that!
I'm starting to notice that my clothes are fitting very differently. The funny part is that they are different in areas I didn't expect! My sleeves are all longer now and my necklines all go much wider out on my shoulders. Since my pants were all elastic, they still fit in the waist but the legs have gone from roomy to quite spacious and the seat can accomodate one more! My dresses and skirts are all longer, too. I'm thinking about going to Goodwill next week.
I have been craving something sweet this week and I don't know why. I know how sick it will make me so I don't want it - but the craving is there. Weird!
Somebody explain something to me. Why is it that I could eat McDonald's 5x a week and be perfectly happy with that but I am completely bored with food now and the thought of eating something twice in a row nauseates me? I just don't get it. I have to figure something out, though. I don't like to cook and fast food is pretty much off limits so... now what? A lot of premade foods have all kinds of icky stuff in them (sodium, bell peppers, sugars) and I am pretty sick of the stuff that I have been regularly eating.
You know, maybe this is the beginning of my new relationship with food. It is not something that I enjoy so much any more. Now it is just something I have to do. Don't get me wrong! I still like going out for a meal (boy, I'm now a cheap date!) or having dinner with my mom or my in-laws. I just don't much care for the food portion of the event! The funny part is that my tastes have changed so much since surgery so I now have no idea what I can eat or can't eat. Add in the fact that something that went down fine yesterday can irritate the heck out of the pouch today and you can see where my apathy comes in! It really is a whole new way of life. I've also learned that if I am not getting enough protein, I will stop losing weight. I wonder if that is what contributed to my long stall?
I had a great dream or vision (whichever you are more comfortable with) during my meditation last night. I went into meditation with a couple of things bothering me (a decision about starting our own business and concern over my post-op life, the food issues, etc.). During the meditation, I suddenly saw and felt myself about a year in the future. It was amazing! My body was at least 1/3 smaller than it is right now - I could feel how much less space I was taking up, how much roomier the chair was, how my body actually felt (no big belly in front! I knew that we had been doing our business for a while and were making good money at it (I could feel jewelry that I had bought!) and I was so pleased with and grateful for our lives. What a wonderful feeling that was! that totally made me excited about the next year and where I'm/we're headed!
Everybody wish me luck this weekend. I have to write a huge paper (3500-4200 words, about 10 pages) on a topic that really doesn't thrill me. It's due Monday and guess how many words I've written so far! Maybe 75?
I hope you all have a fantastic weekend and find the time to do one special thing for yourselves!
Posted By: Khym
Comments to this post:
06/15/2007 19:11
Flavor ghosts!
Hi Khym--
Just wanted to let you know that I really appreciate your blog. I'm doing WW, but a friend of mine is considering gastric bypass. It worries me (I've always had a little anxiety over surgery and medicines!), but reading your blog helps me know what it's like so I can be a more supportive friend to her. So... thanks!
You mentioned in this post about food and your appreciation from it. It sounds like some of it is your memory and cravings needing to come to terms with the changes gastric bypass has given your body and digestion and it's getting a little confused. I'm sure as you get further along, they'll all start to come on the same page. Even though I don't have the same physiological changes you've had, I've noticed that my taste for food has changed significantly. Sometimes, I'll find myself jonesing for a wicked decadent chocolate frosted cupcake (yup--a bit of a chocolaholic here and my sister is a magnificent baker), but once I taste it, it's not as good as what I expected or remembered. It's almost like the good stuff (fresh veggies, whole grains and otherwise healthy food) seems to taste better and more flavorful while the "bad" food (or really just indulgent and not very healthy food) just doesn't taste as good. It's pretty weird, but it helps me make better food choices.
Congratulations on your weight loss and keep up the hard work!
i love the positive attitude!! i know i grumble but its all bark w/ no bite...there is nothing like that inner peace...=)
you need to update you photo... also just being able to step back and watch my boss over the past three years after her gastric bypass, she too has complained about one day she can eat and the next she was having a problem but didn't know why.
what i have observed is that when shes not be sleeping right, not drinking enough or really stressed out she has a difficult time w/ meals.
that stress thing makes a lot of sense to me b/c the stomach as well as all our organs react to stress. w/ the stomach it increases its chemicals thus in enough time and stress will form an ulcer. the pouch is still a stomach w/ the chemical properties of processing going on (the bypass just places the food and stomach juices further down for the big business to take place) but never the less stress gets that stomach rolling and what i think causes what she and your feeling. which your business concerns kinda makes it seem what i'm say maybe true. plus i'm thinking stress and a tiny pouch just magnifys the effects of stress in digestive issues....well maybe... i just had to add my 2 cents which is probably worth just that...lol 2 pennys...lol
sounds like you know how to find that happy place...keep up the good work. maybe you need to sit down and work out a meal plan that you can rotate meals out. pre-make on sunday and get it over w/ and freeze it.
hugss!! glad and excited for you and your adventures
(sorry for rambling, grammer,spelling, and typos...its late but i just had to comment..lol)
I personally love microwave meals. I think they're really good. You get a plethora of choices and they're easy to make. Some of my favorite ones are Smart Choice and Lean Cuisine and Kashi. If you're not into those, you can make your own meals for the week ahead of time and freeze them. When you want to eat them, just cook them in the microwave. That way you know what's in them and they are easy to make. =)
yay mediation! I love just sitting down and doing some deep breathing. Yoga is one of my favorite activities for that reason. It's fabulous!
A smile that makes other people smile? OH MY GOSH! That is the sweetest compliment I have ever received in my life. Thank you so much. You made my day. <3
