Lets start over

Hi !

I should actually wrote for all these days, when i was fighting my temptation in a week for not eating any chocolates but at the end of the weeks i just jumped and bought 3 kinds and eat them up :D

But i felt that i didn't move me enough to start log on my wait losing.

This week i will go to gym as much as i can, i have planed for Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Sunday :D it is lots of them, but i do it to see if i can make at least two of them.

Any way, today was really hard day for me, my boyfriend and i decided to go separately ,actually it was him who decided that for both of us and I'm quite mad on him. But i don't find any reason to fight with his decisions because it seems to be the right one, even if i would decide, i would give us more options and ways to stay in our love relation.

I felt really sad, and hurt broken, because he had promised he would never give up on us or abounding me. I understand him and not.. I just don´t think it would be a good idea to doing any thing about it at least right now. I feel it would be good for him to being for himself to understand the way my and my present had felt his life, and i have also feel it.

But it breaks my heart that he decided that.. I don't know if i can ever forget him for that or put my trust on him again.
I´m totally chocked by my owns reactions, i didn't cried at all ! i just got chocked by reading his blog, and the way he did end to us in public for readers who have been following us in more than 3 years.. it is so pity.. that he take away our chances.

When i was sitting in my room, confused about what is happening, I felt i had a few options to do, one of them going to his home, knocking on the door, shaking him hardly and make him realise that is not the right way to chose, other way was just let it be and let it be and...

After a while i just let time pass by and i just sat on my chair, and just stopped feeling sad .

I hope i will be as strong as today..i may give myself just few seconds of crying and pettiness but not more.. I simply don´t want to be with a boy who gives up on us.. it will make every things much more easier...

I would never give up on us baby, but if you chose to do that.. sorry for you.. you just lost the love of your dreams girls..