It's upsetting and humbling to come back and read my old goals. They haven't changed. I didn't complete them. I commit anew today, to finding myself where I want to be. It will be easy, it will feel right, I will be able to make it work without eating foods I dislike, or always having to be odd man out. I mean, obviously I can't just eat everything that flows past me at a party or whatever, but there are delicious and wonderful foods that are for me.
I've been doing Weight Watchers since July and I was doing great when I got hit with an anniversary that was troubling. I have been eating a bit out of control for the past few weeks and I am recommitting today. I am meeting a friend at the noon Weight Watchers meeting in Westminster and we are both going to face the scale. She is a lifetime member who has fallen a few pounds over the limit. You would think, as beautiful as she is, and as slender as she is, that it wouldn't be hard for her to go back and weigh in and pull those pounds off. She has seen the plan work for her before. But when we spoke yesterday, I could hear the pain in her voice and feel the pain flowing off her. It amazed me, as it matches the pain and shame that I feel. Here I am, again, and I went in to update my weight trackers here so I can use them on a Bulletin Board I am posting on, and I have the same weight goals that I had in 2007. Sigh.
I have new tools, new determination, and new support. I will make this work.
Yesterday was my 48th birthday and I weighed 242 pounds.
Today:
For breakfast I had steel cut oats with nuts and fruit;
For lunch I had Black Forest Mushroom Soup and a salad with balsamic vinegar and a small amount of Newmans Own original dsg. I had a Cliffbar shortly afterwards.
We went to an extra dance night at our teachers' studio Wednesday night. And they did some styles from some classes that we had had earlier in the year. One of them is jive, and there was this one jive move, involving a certain kind of twirl, where I always used to get my shoulder hurt when V would twirl me. Of course I'm about 20 pounds or so lighter now... and wouldn't you know? It didn't hurt. And... I danced all but one dance, and I didn't sit between the dances nearly as much!
BTW, I'm really happy with Medifast and have lost 13.4 pounds for my first 2 weeks' total.
Woo hoo! Well, you know how yesterday on my one week of Medifast I was hoping to see 239? Well, this girl is not seeing 239, ever again! I saw 238.8 this morning (twice, I re-weighed to make sure I was seeing what I was seeing!!)
Ok, this is my favorite one so far... Zucchini "Noodles"!!! There is a thread in the recipe section.
V brought over ground buffalo, which we cooked seperately in a pan with garlic and spices. We took potato peelers and made thick "noodles" out of the zucchini, and then microwaved them in the microwave ziplocs. Then we mixed with tomato (canned) and nuked again. Then I weighed out my buffalo (5 OZ) and added 2 wedges of Laughing Cow to it. And then I took my 1.5 cups of zucchini-tomato mixture and tossed it with the buffalo. Oh my gosh! It didn't take much imagination to see the zucc as noodles! We both devoured our plates of it, and I don't think V needed any insulin with it either. (He is type 1, so its fun to come up with low carb dinners that we can both share...)
I wish I had taken a picture of it, it was a humongous plate of food!!
Oh and I bought a few things today to make my days easier... I bought egg beaters and ground flax seed (refrigerator case in Whole Foods for that) , and the Laughing Cow cheese... and V had already brought me some FF cream cheese the other day so I could try that "ice cream" recipe. Oh yes, and I bought some SF creamer to try. If I don't like it I can always bring it to work and donate it.
And I bought some spice to bring to work - some chili powder that I'm really fond of, and some garam masala that I think will be really good in the chicken and rice soup (that one I'm going to taste test before I bring it along). I've been having curry with the chicken soup too, that makes it taste amazing.
I'm loving my Medifast so far, the food is good and I feel VERY STRONG. Healthy and younger - people have commented on the spring in my step and the glow to my skin, from Day 4 on ... very interesting. I can see that I'm going to be needing to have some MF even when I'm thin, for the health benefits alone!
I lost 8.6 pounds, officially, as of this morning, for my first week of Medifast. I find that promising. For a moment the scale flirted with me, showing me an additional 2 pounds lower, but then settled on the 241.8 again. It’s OK, it will show me that and more in June, I believe.
I’m very happy with the diet, and the food, and the taste of most of the MF food. I have a few things to work on, like the fact that I bought a lot of the eggs, thinking I would want them for breakfast, when lately all I have wanted is to drink a shake and go out the door. But that’s a personal thing, not a problem with Medifast itself.
I’m also reading the Beck Diet solution. I don’t agree with everything Judith Beck says, so I am going to take what I want and leave the rest. But some of her tools are right on. I have begun to believe that I can, actually, do this program and then do maintenance. I’ve started planning for the maintenance wardrobe - what would I wear to work and to play, when I am at a steady size? It’s a GREAT question.
Anyhow, I am off to the chiropractor this morning, thank goodness. My should has been paining me since coming back from Miami.
So... before I went on my trip I was around 246. And then last week I was on a business trip, and when I went to weigh in yesterday before starting my first Medifast day, I was 250 and I was so bummed because I had gained the weight on the trip. Well, this morning (drum roll please) I was 245. OK, I know its mostly water on the first day (and not a surprise considering I got up 5 times in the night to pee) but I wasn't convinced it would show up on the scale this morning... suspension of disbelief, right, and step onto the scale.
I feel like the universe has smiled upon me and said, yes, Miriam, this will work if you work it!
I had moments yesterday where I was hungry. Not starving, but I could feel it. At one point I did take my hoodia, but the rest of the time I drank my water, or had a cup of tea, or decided it was time for a Medifast meal.
This is all good. I am nervous about going to work (where the free snack dispensers live) but I know I can DO this!! And I want to do this. I don't have to go back to work until Tuesday. Between now and then, I will taste test the other kinds of soup/chili that I bought, and if there's any beverage I haven't tasted yet I will do that too. Then I will be able to carry my food with confidence!
I'm wearing a size 22, and I have cleaned and hung some of my nice 20s in the extra closet so I can have them as soon as the 22s are too loose. I'm still able to wear some 24s but probably by the weekend I will need to swap things around. I'm going to box the "to be sold" clothes and have Jenny take them to the storage unit. I think when I break into onederland will be the right time to start selling them.
I'm definitely having some digestive disturbances of the noisy kind last night and today. I'm going to try taking some enzymes and/or maybe lactaid and seeing if that helps. I work in a law firm, I'd really rather not be tooting up the office I share... LOL!
My flight was delayed and I got in at 11:30 PM last night. My medifast order was waiting for me. I had a vanilla shake last night to taste it, and it was fine. This morning I have had my first "official" Medifast meal, a chocolate diabetic shake, to which I added some instant coffee. I am excited! It was a little thick - I may add some more ice to the next one.
The plan, to remind myself (and for the home viewing audience who would like to play along) is, do my first 3 days now, on this long weekend (Memorial Day) since I have no work to go to. [The first 3 days, for anyone used to eating a lot of carbs and sugar, can feel like a withdrawal, just like Atkins..]Then, by the time I have to go back to the office, it will be Day 4 and I should be feeling more "the thing"... I know that these next few days may be a touch challenging, since I ate all sorts of carbs and sugar on my business trip.
Other things for today: redo my vitamin packets - no multi vitamins needed, but load them up with glucosamine, fish oil, etc so that I get those in with my Medifast meals for best absorption. Medifast meals provide me with my RDA of vitamins, so I need to look at the packets and decide what is missing from my own custom vitamin needs (anyone who knows me well, knows I am a total vitamin junkie!)
I am excited and psyched, and I know I can do this! I have been looking forward to it. The food I was eating in Miami lost its charm halfway through the week, but I didn't have a way to start while on the trip. Hearing from my daughter that a large package had arrived for me was very exciting! I kept telling myself, I am ready, I can't wait to start my Medifast.
And its true. I am sooo psyched to do this now. I am ready to get healthy and get thinner, and I know this plan will work for me. I gained 4 pounds on my business trip, and I have added that to my ticker. Watch this space for the new thinner me! LOL.
I have an account on the mymedifast page and I have added my inventory. It should be easy to keep track of my meals there. :) I am soooo happy about doing this! I have a lot of confidence in this plan since its the one that used to only be available from doctors. It has aspects about it that worked for me during Atkins, Kimkins and ILD, and it resembles the MRC plan but the packets are so much healthier! The MRC packets had a lot more artificial ingredients and aspartame, which I have never liked. I have some MRC packets left, and I may use them in place of a certain type of Medifast packet since they are non returnable.
I was amazed to hear that if I buy a new flavor of Medifast food and use one packet, and hate it, that they will take the box and the other 6 packets, and replace it with a full box of something else. At MRC they wouldn't replace anything.
Anyway, I have lots and lots and lots and "NRE" (New relationship energy) about the plan today. Of course, if one can't feel that at the beginning, its a bad sign. But I will check in over the next few days and weeks, to see how I am feeling at that point, and to make sure my enthusiasm and enjoyment of the program is still with me.
I'm definitely babbling, but I'm so happy to be home, to be doing something about my weight, and to feel confidence that I am not hurting my body by doing it. I don't just want to be thinner, I want to be healthier!
