I felt good and bad...I don't know.

Today after work and after Curves, it went home and waited for one of our employees to stop over.  I'm giving her any of my fat clothes that she wants before I give the rest to Goodwill.  It was hard to do this.  I had to be very careful when I brought up the subject with her.  I mean, she's been watching me get smaller than her.  She's been watching me for over 6 months.  I started out bigger, now I probably weight 40 or so pounds less than her.  So the subject is sensitive to say the least. 

Anyway, we started going through the piles of coats, sweaters, dress clothes, t-shirts.  She was tentative at first, but I assured her that I would rather she have them than for them to go to some stranger.  She really got into it then.  We went through everything....it took a long time.  A funny thing happened to me, though.  I started noticing just how huge my clothes were.  I mean, when I was wearing them, they didn't seem that big.  They seemed downright small at times when I was trying to fit into them.  I picked up a pair of slacks and just stared at them in awe.  Was I really that big??  I still don't believe it!  I could fit 2 of me in those slacks.  Then I thought.....maybe it was just that pair....so I picked up another that I remember being tight......HUGE......absolutely outragiously huge!

So while I was feeling bad for my employee because of the touchy situation, I was also feeling good for her.  She can't afford many of the things I gave to her.  They will be used and appreciated.  I also felt bad for myself and good for myself.  I mourn the years I lost while I was trapped in that body, but I'm so happy that I am regaining my life.

All in all, the purging of the clothes is a great feeling.  Can't wait to take those bags full to Goodwill.  Did I say I have nothing to wear???.......gotta go shopping.