Your torso is looking tighter... I can really tell
THAT is something a co-worker said to me when I walked in this morning... and THAT is pretty cool! I can feel a little difference, which is surprising because I usually cant tell if it is a pound or two... but in this instance.. it could be three or four. My scale said 238 this morning... and I almost fell off while screaming!
Can you believe it? I have actually seen a number in the 230's on my scale... god I NEVER thought I would get to that point. It feels like a whole lot more than 60 lbs ... and I am even more shocked at how well I am doing still. I never thought that I would make it over a year on this diet plan either... seriously!! I have been on Weight Watchers for 13 months now... and I have attended meetings religiously since I joined the Monthly Pass program in April. I am just so totally surprised at my dedication and enjoyment of the meetings, process, and successes. Losing weight is NOT easy, but it has not been horribly and painful in perspective.
Now is my entire attitude fixed from last week... HELL NO. I still feel drained, and I still have to fight for that excitement and dedication at some moments. I have been incredibly tired, worn out, stressed, and totally drained this week... intermingled with moments of greatness. Just totally emotional and rollercoaster. I am also feeling really blah so my appetite has been weak and i have been struggling to eat points, instead of refusing them -- and that is an interesting perspective.
On to other life issues... I have been asked to coach an 18U travel softball team here in Indiana, and I am so totally stoked about it.
When I was offered the position, it took me a few days to pole the people in my life and see how I personally felt about it as well. It was really a great and bad thing because of the opportunity, but then the time commitment. I have already dedicated every weekend in June/July of 2009 -- and that is an interesting promise to make to someone a year in advance. Although, I live for the sport.... so that is also a neat thing to do. I was worried that I would not be able to handle girls that age, being that they are only a few years younger than I am.
How do you gain respect, yet remain who you are as a person with these girls? I am jokester who doesnt take myself too seriously, but works hard for what I want --- and walking that thin line with 16/18 year olds is becoming increasingly difficult. I had a 16 year old yesterday whom I became more friend than coach with for a brief moment, and lost whatever respect I had gained at that point. It can REALLY eat at me when something like that happens, and then I realized that you get no room for error with these girls. This same girl had a snotty attitude from that point forward, culminating in a comment that required me to heave some pretty hefty authority on that before I kicked her out. Not a huge deal, but a bit frustrating to deal with on the second day of tryouts!
Last worry... where are all the girls who play softball in Indiana? We have an 18 and 16U team, and we only have six girls who have tried out so far. WE NEED GIRLS!!!! I am so totally stressed out that there will not be enough girls to play and I will have gotten my hopes up and my spirits, and find out that I dont even have a team to coach. I dont think that will happen, but it is a thought in the back of my head.... worry time.
Ok.. my life is a bumble of craziness right now. My boyfriend is attending the Gen Con event from 8am-midnight three nights in a row with Sunday being 8am-4pm. It is totally fine that he is doing that, and I am not mad at all... but man is it weird to go an entire day without speaking or snuggling with one another. Add to that... he came home last night and I was already asleep and did not wake up until he was already dressed and ready this morning. I miss my boy... and I miss my couch... and I miss being on my couch with my boy.
Hopefully life gets a bit slower next week... and we can go back to date nights, less softball for a bit, and personal time together --- although he starts school on Monday.... so what are the chances of that happening?
WHAT HAVE WE GOTTEN OURSELVES INTO?