hello everybody!!!

Ok so I tried to ward off the evil food spirits but they cornered me at wendy's today!!! Does anyone know how many points a chicken sandwich and medium fries are?????? Yeah i freakin blew it!!!! So now what??? I probably need to do 15 and 1/2 hours of pure cardio to get these calories off of me. I knew I couldnt go long without screwing up!!! I was doing great all day until I had this over bearing urge for wendy's and my kids (as usual) were not helping!!!! With all the MOM PLEASE WE HAVENT BEEN THERE IN SO LONG!!!!! and the Just cause your on a diet doesnt mean we are. So the evil little ones turned against me and joined the evil food spirits and I gave in!!!! HELP!!!!!!!......................

Good Morning!

I hope everyone is doing well!!! Its a new day lets make it a good one! I think we should all try to do something today that we wouldnt normally do. be it yoga pilates whatever! im going to try Yoga. They say it is good for so many things including the digestive track and since im thinking about doing one of those cleansing deals i might as well add a little Yoga. acually im just trying to find something new to motivate me and at this point i don't care what the hell it is as long as im doing it!!!!

I weighed myself and I'm only 202. Thats upseting but Im expecting a big jump because i have really been doing great lately. i seem to have the hang of things (I hope this lasts!) But I have failed before and sure i will again.

Today i will be strong and ward off the evil food spirits that haunt me! LOL

9-11

because of a lot of the work I have done lately and since 9/11 one special gov agency offered us movie tickets to go see the new 9/11 movie. everyone was talking about it today and how they are going to see this movie. I have a lot of trouble with that because I have seen the trailor for this movie and I had to imediatly turn it off I couldnt stop thinking about it since. It brings back some horrible memories. I never want to relive that again. i know that the movie has based itself on how the members of the flight were heros. I agree with that. They were heros! I just cant believe they offered us tickets to relive the pain of that terror again? I just had to vent before I drove myself to eat into oblivian!!!! thanks im ok now. i must be heading for PMS or detoxing from sugar or something because Im never really this emotional im really suprised by this. i really hope I snap out of it by the time I go to work tommorow!

maybe I just need to eat.hehehhe I'm going to do that ..............

Day 16

Wow i really made it 16 days of course I gave up on a couple of those days but I managed to get back on track which is shocking! I have never hung in there like this before. I havent weighed myself but i know in total from my highest weight which was 214 on 3/10 Im now down to 203 at leat thats what i was a few days ago. so I'll probably weigh myself tomorrow and I'm dying to know the outcome! I'm really hoping for a lb but if not thats ok too. I know I may weigh more since Ive been walking and doing more excercises. when i started weight watchers I was 209. I admit it was very hard to get used to the weight watchers points but wow It really is easier now. I have trouble trying to eat all my points. Its 5:51 pm and I have 15 points left. Gees where did the time go. (I cant believe Im saying that!) well I better go Im going to eat some fruit then go for my walk then Off I go to bed. Im working at the airport  tomorrow. 9/11 really screwed up my hours at work thanks a lot piece of s*%^t terrorists. well atleast they didnt scare me from returning to work! F.U. terrorists!

well happy dieting all and to all a good night!

easter didnt do me in!!!!!

So I went to my aunts house and I ate two bowls of fruit salad!!! thats it!!!! The whole day and I stayed withing my 26 points!!!! im soooo happy!!! today i went and bought a fiber cereal called fiber One. Its actually really good and eating 1 cup with 1% milk is only 2 points. I dont drink the milk only moisten my cereal with it because I hate milk. this cereal is so good my 7 year old actually likes it. I'd recommend it to any dieter!!! Or life changer!!!

im eating food i would never give a chnace to and Im doing really good. Im proud of myself but sometimes I do have to admit that it becomes more than day by day it becomes minute by minute.

You have to remind yourself that the minute by minute is the only time you'll ahve to strugle through once that time passes the next day will be so different. God I feel like a drug addict!!!! Its not much fun chnaging your habits but it does make you feel better!

Good luck my fellow dieters or "life changers!"

easter

another freakin holiday were food is involved. i almost wish I could stay home and not go to my Aunts house were all that yummy food is. God I love food! it makes me happy.

But, im back on track and today, so far, im doing great I even went for a walk. Of course just to have a good day I had to have an inspirational talk by a fellow blogger, Thanks ashleyB!!!!!

Sometime, for me it just takes some talking to by someone that understands what Im going through. In my house there is none of that. I come here for support. I read these blogs of all these people and I feel like I have found friends that understand. Most of them dont even know I exhist but when I read their posts i almost know I know them because how else could we all have so much in common. Im glad I found this site. I wouldve never have made it this far. Thanks friends, hehehe

Back on the wagon again

You know? Its no wonder so many people fail at this. I cant see my weight loss being forever! I cant even do this for 2 weeks never mind the rest of my life. So I failed again and now Im going to try again. I gained 3 lbs in just 2 days and it took me over a week to lose 9. This is so hard and no one in my household is supportive at all. I just wish I had some extra help, anything would be good. I'd like to go on the show The Biggest Loser atleast people there motivate you.

i'M FAILING!!!!

I am having trouble and dont know what to do. I weigh more and I dont feel the same! HELP!!!!!! I'm losing my motivation and every bit of ambition that I had. I dont know how to keep up my motivation through the hard times. I just wnat to eat all my regular stuff I normally eat. I hate the stuff Ive been eating and this is just getting harder. I really need to hang in there. I dont wnat to be fat anymore!

I weigh 202!!!!!!

I'm almost out of the 200's!!!!! I couldnt believe it when I weighed myself this morning!!!!! Im so happy!!!!!!!! I havent been under 200 in over 3 years! All I want is to see that scale say anything under a 200 mark! I pray i make it!

Day six

well its my first weekend and I didnt take my Phentermine today because I know I lacked sleep this week. i feel great and so far im still able to think before i eat, LOL usually i just start eating and dont stop. I really am impressed with myself and I pray I dont fail like Ive done so many times before. I do feel alone though even though I know Im not the only one struggling through this crazyness. I just dont have fat friends and dont have anyone to talk to that I can relate too. So my struggles continue alone, I cry alone. I hate how I feel about food. My every thought of every minute is about food, now how crazy does that sound? I feel like a drug addict. quiting smoking which I thought was the hardest thing Ive ever done wasnt even this hard. well my day begins with my morning prayer: Please god let me get through today without loosing control of my erratic eating behavier. Just one more day please!