SAD! SAD! SAD! SAD!

Thanks guys.......

It has been a very hard trying week.  I want to let you know guys that I appreciate all the support.  I cried as I was crying.  It made me feel so loved. 

I can not believe that it was sooooo devasting (?).  I knew it was going to bad, but WHOA,  I was holding on and I was bucked off.  I am trying to wipe off from my butt still.  ( Thats' cute huh? ) lol  I think that Fucking Horse kicked my heart so hard, I didn't want to get up.  This is so hard.  

I don't know if I told you guys that after I had the heart valve surgery, stroke, etc.... yada yada....I lived in my bed, no calls, no company etc......drugged (legal, thank you :-))......Then when my daughter Dianna had "My Jellybean", she became the reason to get up and decide to live.  Guys I have to go.  I can't write anymore.  I am crying so hard I can't blog.  I will blog later.  I swear I am dying.  I can't write about this...I am sorry guys.....

I luv you guys....lilypad           

lilypad

My heart breaks for you. I can't imagine the pain you are feeling...I remember when I moved 6 hours away from my mother she stayed in bed and my sister said she mourned like we died...she wailed and cried for days..I didn't understand it then as I get older and my children do to I am understanding more and more the pain...

Your Daughter an Grandaughter are so blessed to have you...Remember that jellybean wants grandma to be happy and not so sad..Jelly bean wants you to "live" remember she is your reason.

Big hugs to you lilypad..

Let it all out!!!

We are here to take it all from you so it doesnt build up inside!! I wish I could take some of the pain away from you! I give you my shoulder for any amount of time you need it!! I know you miss Jelly Bean... but do you think JB would want you soo sad!!?? You have to be strong and get yourself healthy and strong so when the time comes you can go see her or she can come see you!!! Put all the sadness into motivation and you will be able to see her before you know it!!! lotsa luv 2 ya!!!