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I drove by an older lady yesterday.  She had the matching skirt and jacket along with sensible heels look.  Not to mention the classic black handbag.  The thing that struck me was that she had her head completely down focused on the sidewalk.  I did a double take because it made me think about how I want to face the world. 

She could easily be me in a few years (okay decades, but still). 

I am the "jolly" fat chick that dresses really well right now, but is that who I really want to be?  No.

I can usually bluff my way in a crowd if needed, but mostly I don't like to make eye contact because I don't want anyone to focus on my hideous appearance. 

So anyway, I am still making healthy choices most of the time and feeling better.  It's weird how that happens; move from instant gratification choices - fast food, etc.  to healthy and your overall condition improves.  Go figure. 

I have even been playing my piano most evenings again.  It has been a very long time - I am hoping to pick up my guitar again too, but I am not going to push too hard and stress out about it.

So far, so good.

I hope all of you are doing well.

Good things to you,

Moonflower : )

Warmest Wishes to You

When I read your blog, I could immediately relate to your feelings of low self-worth and the "trying to be invisible" mentality. I am a musician as well. I play guitar, piano and mandolin as well as being a singer/songwriter. I know how soothing and peaceful it can be to play your little heart out. Music is the purest form of stress relief and is a most wonderful way to vent negative feelings! Keep your chin up! Don't let anyone dictate your self-worth to you. It takes guts to become empowered and take charge of your health. Hang in there! I know that the universe has wonderful things in store for you!

Ciao, Stef

Always Remember...

Keep your chin up high and face the world with dignity.  When you let people see your beautiful face, they will never remember the size of your hips, but the beauty of your smile.  You are worth so much and if you keep your head down and watch the street, you miss the beauty of the sky above.  You are a beautiful, strong and dignified woman, and damn anyone who tells you differently!

hello moonflower

i have been gone for a couple of months, and now you are back and posting. good for you!   i am happy to hear that your son has come to his senses.  you can never replace a mothers love.  i know what you mean about not feeling good about yourself because of your weight.  i think that is what has motivated me, i had to get to the point where i was completely disgusted with myself.  keep on trying and you will see results.  i believe in you!

hello missy

just stopping by to let you know that you are missed.  come back and tell us how you are doing.  if you have fallen of the wagon, get back on. you can do this!!!!