My Krazy N Frazzled Life

My journey through weight loss and rediscovery.

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  • Name: Krazyfrazzledmom
  • City: Des Moines
  • Region: Iowa
  • Country: United States

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Height: 157.5cm
Start weight: 239.20lb
Current weight: 137.90lb
Goal weight: 130.00lb
Lost to date: 101.30lb
Remaining: 7.90lb

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Heavy Heart...

Wrote Nov 4th 2007 2:17 AM

I talked to my daughter tonight. She is still not feeling good. She is starting to run a low grade temperature and again the pain is growing. She said she feels sick to her stomach and dizzy. I told her she needs to drink, because of the kidney infection and to help flush the kidney stones out. But she said she can't that it makes her sick. Her husband is away on a two day business trip for his work, he gets back tomorrow night.
When she was in the hospital the Doctor there told her she needs to come back to the United States to receive the urgent medical care she needs from her Urologist at the Mayo Clinic. She refuses! She won't come back home unless she can bring her husband with her. Well that isn't possible, because he is not a resident of the US. She can come back home and file for a Immigrant Visa for a Spouse but I have heard that there is a waiting list of 4-6 years, and that is not to say he will be approved to come here. And part of the requirement to file for a Immigrant Visa for a Spouse is she would need to show evidence of financial support, or if she couldn't she would have to have someone willing to sponsor him. Here is the thing. My daughter was born with a lot of physical disabilities, has been on SSI disability since she was 7 years old. So she has never worked. So for her to come back to home and work would be almost impossible. She has asked her dad and I if we would be willing to sponsor him. For me, my answer would be YES in a heart beat, but I am not working... for her dad, absolutely NOT. I am so torn... My daughter is mad and upset that no one will sign a Affidavits of support for him to come here. No one is willing, and I can understand that totally. But it makes me feel completely hopeless and I feel like a failure as a mother. I need to get my daughter back here so she can get the vial health care that she so desperately needs. I am afraid she will die over there before she gets back home. He wants to send her home, but she won't come without him.
I am going to call her urologist at the Mayo Clinic on Monday to fill him on everything that has been happening and what treatment she has received already. Maybe he can offer some kind of advise or maybe hopefully he will be willing to call the doctor that is treating her in Jordan. Problem is... the doctor in Jordan speaks very little English.
I am sorry if any of this doesn't make any sense....  I am just going out of my mind.... I am so worried about her, I can't sleep, I can't function. I am depressed. I don't know what I am going to do.

Comments to this post:

((((((( SHELLY ))))))) -- That's a big hug!

Shelly, my heart goes out to you.  I can certainly understand your concern, and I hope she comes back to get the help she needs.  You know, when I came here we needed a sponsor and his sister was only too happy to do it ... and we never needed to make use of it, so it cost her nothing.  The way it works in Australia is that your sponsor is only affected if you end up going on "The Dole" (or welfare) rather than working.  In that event, your sponsor can be liable for up to $2,000 (I believe) toward the cost of those welfare payments and no more.

Do you think her husband would have any trouble finding work in the US?  Any reason to think they would need to rely on their sponsor?

Also, I cannot believe that, as her husband, he would not be welcome in the States at least while they are applying for the visa.  In Australia, I was granted a visa to come here and get married, and then I applied to stay.  I don't see why the fact that they are already married should mean he can't come at all, even to start the process.  I hope it all works out for them, but maybe she could come back home just long enough to get her health back, then go back to him?  I understand not wanting to leave him, but surely her health must come first.




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