I haven't been able to blog all weekend, it's been a crazy one. Our closest friends moved this weeked so I was helping them while my husband and hers were both out of town. We were taking care of our 9 month olds, and her 8 year old daughter while trying to get my own house packed to move in a week and a half. I spent the last three nights at her house while she got used to the house/neighbourhood and funny noises in the house :) Were chicken! Anyways, that being said, I wasn't able to prepare any of my own meals, and had to eat what was offered, I wasn't able to exercize, and had little sleep because my daughter got sick and woke up at 5:20 am the last 3 mornings. Today, I am throwing a baby shower as well, so we were planning and preparing for that this weekend, too!!! I have to drive out to LAX to pick up my husband an hour before the shower starts. I'm going NUTS.
BUT....I wieghed in and apparenly have lost around 4 pounds this week! Not bad! I thought for sure I'd go off program as I had no schedule, I was eating fast food, pizza and had dessert shoved in my face on several occassions (which I graciously declined)
My daughter is taking a nap, and I tried, but I've got too much going on in my brain right now to rest, but I'm absolutely exhausted. I better be off to get some stuff done before my munchkin wakes up! Thank you to those who checked in on me this weekend since I haven't been blogging. I just find this whole site too cool!
I can't believe how much strength I gain from reading all of your blogs. I was really hungry last night and felt like I could just have a rampage in the pantry, but instead I just hung out in bed and read. Thank you for being so willing to share in this journey so we can gain strength and encouragement from one another.
I've been encouraged by what I've seen on the scale so far. It hasn't felt like I've had to work very hard for my losses yet, but it's only the first 2 weeks, so I'm expecting things to start slowing down here pretty quick; that'll be just fine.
As I read people's blogs I realize that I'm not the only one who struggles to stay on track when my weight fluctuates, or when I'm in the middle of an emotional/stressful time. I'm not the only who is 'all or nothing'; one treat turns into a landslide day/week/month. It makes me feel just a little more normal and helps me realize the importance of being honest with myself and celebrating my success instead of caving to my 'mistakes'.
I have a hard time not feeling 'guilty' when I eat all my points. Am I the only one? I know this is rediculous. We're suppose to eat all our recommended daily points to keep our metabolism up, and maybe its old habits from my eating disorder creeping back in, but I wish I could just eat all my points and enjoy them for all they're worth instead of trying to find ways to eat just 2 less, just 5 less etc...
I hope you all wake up feeling strong, encouraged and excited about taking better care of youself! Happy Wednesday (half way to the weekend!!!!)
I made it through a week of WW with one bad day, but I didn't give up. I weigh in tomorrow morning and I'm half petrified, and half ambivalent. I figure, TOM is here, I had a really horrible day, didn't exercize much so if I drop any I just need to be glad. It is the best I've done (by far) in the past 2 years....it's a start.
I'm exhausted. My daughter is going through a phase...or something, so she's wore me out this week, so I'm going to go do the ironing and hit the sack.
So, I pulled my stuff together today - as a result of blogging and the encouragement I have recieved on this site. In every of circumstance over the past 18 months, I would have given up on this again simply because I had a landslide day. I feel empowered.
I stepped on the scale because I didn't realize I was suppose to log my weight on a daily basis for this thing. I was originally weighed in the morning at WW, and weighed myself tonight and came up 2.0 lbs lighter?! So, maybe, just maybe I lost...some...
I am suppose to weigh in tomorrow, but it's obviously a holiday, so I won't go in until Tuesday. Because of the reminders I have been given by others, this 'game' isn't over if I gain a pound. It's got to be a life-style change. Being adopted, I don't have much family history, but I have enough to know that morbid obesity, diabetes and rampid heart disease run in my genes. At 24, I overlook these things and think 'it will never happen to me', but I also never thought I would be 180 lbs.
I have always been 'bigger' then most. I'm tall, I'm naturally muscular and bigger boned. I have been athletic and fit (not necessarily 'thin) all my life until 2 years ago, and it hit me that my teenage body is gone, and it's only going to get harder to stay in shape, harder to lose weight and harder to keep it off. My time is no longer my own; it is shared with an incredible husband and daughter, which means I don't have 1-2 hours to go the Y whenever I please to work out. I fit my 'workout' in when my daughter feels it fits HER schedule - whether I'm tired, hungry, or just plain lazy.
I am confused by the body I was left with after the birth. I guess I expected to just bounce back with no effort. Maybe because the preganancy was a (beautiful) suprise, I wasn't prepared for the toll it would take; the sags, stretch marks, loss of muscle ... need I go on?! I have to come to terms that again, this body has far more worthy purposes then to just 'look pretty'. It has accomplished much by growing my daughter and birthing her. I can still look beautiful and I desire that, but that is not my body's sole purpose (thank goodness).
I'm learning about perspective. I guess a kid will do that to you. A royal kick in the pants for this care-free college kid who got thrown into parent-hood and couldn't be more thankful for it....but at the same time, realizing that I'm ALSO more then a mom. I am an individual woman who needs self care, compassion and respect.
So, how I do change my height on my profile? I'm 5'9" and it says 5'0"?! Guess I typed it in wrong at the beginning and have no idea how to go back.
Thanks!!
So I thought I was on track, guess I was wrong. I had a horrible day yesterday; one 'mistake' and I just let go. It's all or nothing with me. I had decided yesterday to not do my weigh-in this upcoming Tuesday, but today I'm thinking that's the most stupid idea. One bad day isn't how I got to this weight and state of mind. It was a LOT of bad days over the past 2 years. Maybe I'll just use the free pass. I also started TOM, which usually makes me gain a little water weight as well as eat because I'm all hormonal.
I'm so hard on myself, and that's when I give up. I really appreciate the encouragement from others, I guess I assumed no one was reading these.
I need to get my daughter and myself ready for church. The hubby is sick in bed so I'm probably not going to get much of a break today from Kate.
I can't believe I'm here. I'm 4 days into weight watchers, and I'm kind of feeling stupid that I'm proud of myself for sticking with it for 4 days. In such a time of change; a move, unsettled job situation, sickness in the family, crabby baby, I don't know how I'm pulling it together, but I think I'm on the right track.
Having Katelyn in September was my biggest life accomplishment, but raising her, though the deepest joy I've known, isn't bringing me a sense of accomplishment. I've lost who I am; I am bigger now then I have ever been, more out of shape then I have ever been and have less energy then ever as well as less time to spend on myself, exercisizing, preparing meals and general self care.
I've never lost weight properly. It's always been aided by diet pills, excessive exercize and eating-disordered habits. This time, I have no choice but to do it the healthy way. I'm still breastfeeding my angel, and have to take care of my body so I can take care of her. It's a blessing in disguise.
I need to accomplish this weight loss. I'm only 23, its too early to let myself go, for both health and esteem issues. I want to have more kids, but I am a young mom, and want to keep up with my kids and set a healthy example for them. I can't let myself down, I can't do this for anyone but myself.
I'm proud of myself for biting the bullet and starting. I will follow through.
