I wish I had time to pause and enjoy these moments, but there isn't enough time! I'm having trouble keeping up with your blogs this week, and I just hate that. Work is getting backed up, and I'm a day behind my schedule.
I feel rushed and depleted. The house is so quiet I think I might just close my eyes and sleep myself straight to Saturday. BUT, there is no time for sleep. Nope. Just work, lotsa work, and even more work.
It's kind of nice to look at my ring while I'm typing away, though!! lol. It's so pretty.
Back to work.
p.s. I had to buy some comforable fat clothes today for vacation... hated that!!
pss (or is it pps??)... Oddly enough, though, I've been so busy that I haven't noticed I've hardly had time to eat... and as a result, my work pants were uncomfortably HUGE today.... and they were straight out of the dryer. Kinda makes me wonder why I bought fat clothes. ?? lol. doh. Most of what I bought are shirts, though, and I want roomy shirts that won't hug my fat rolls!
I'm officially engaged! HTB (husband to be!) proposed this afternoon. I picked the setting last week, so I kinda knew it was coming. lol. He was going to propose on our vacation, but apparently he's even more impatient than I am. haha. He wanted to show it to me and check the fit, and I told him no, no, no, I couldn't see it until he proposed, and so he dropped to the floor and said wonderful things and asked me if I'd marry him. So I said yes, and there ya have it! The ring is more beautiful than I could have imagined.
I'm three-quarters of the way done with my projected plan for work today. I may even exceed my projection before the night is up.
I've eaten a small lunch left over from food BF brought home last night. (Nothing nearly as heavy as what he usually brings home, so THAT's good.)
I've folded two loads of laundry and have another one in the washer, with a couple more loads sorted and ready to go!
I've removed from my closet the clothes that are either too small or too ugly. They are going in a basket and heading to the top shelf of the closet. I'm going to focus on a small core group of clothing and try to keep things manageable. I'll urge BF to do the same. (We share a small closet, and most of my things are piled in laundry baskets.... I don't even remember what I have in there!)
So far so good. Next household duty is cleaning the bathroom. After that will be my dresser drawers. Most of it doesn't fit, and, therefore, doesn't need to be there!
I feel productive and motivated, and I am so eager to start my vacation that I think I'm going to pop!
It's definitely Saturday.... I felt so out of sorts yesterday after being off on my days all week. To be pefectly frank, I feel cheated out of a day! lol. Saturday was here before I could look forward to it. Now what?
I had a pretty bad binge yesterday at Perkins. When I got home, I fell asleep and didn't wake up until 8:00. That pretty much screwed any kind of productive evening for me given that I felt like sludge when I woke up. The domino effect that happens after I eat like that is fierce. I'm pretty sure today would be a good time to restock the fridge so that same thing doesn't happen again today.
I've also noticed a common thread when I binge like that. It's usually when I have tons of work and I'm too consumed with anxiety to sort the whole mess out and make a plan. Dominos. It's like I need perfect 'order', and when things get out of order, the world starts to trip and tumble. So I think the best thing to do would be to organize the week and have a game plan. We leave for vacation a week from today, and anxiety is going to be heightened with everything that needs to get done.
Just because I slept the morning away doesn't mean the whole day is shot. With some planning, there is the potential for success.
And for accountability, I should probably check back in later and let y'all know how that works out!
A coworker mentioned in conversation this morning that it was Friday. I've been a day behind all week. Shocker. I couldn't believe it until I checked the little date calendar on the computer. It's FRIDAY! omg. lol. That could be even more exciting, except that I am on call today and a job called in for 1:30 this afternoon. Pffft. Oh well.
So, it certainly does seem that I've been in la-la land lately. This week has been extremely busy and exhausting. I was all caught up and feeling calm with work, and then --BAM-- I got hit a hard blow and I'll be scrambling to finish it all before we leave on the 4th for our vacation.
Every night after work, I've been working on the vacation plans. I think I've got it all prepared. We decided to spend four of the nights in Gatlinburg because we want to chill out in a lovely wooded cabin amidst the colorful autumn leaves. I'm hoping they will be colorful when we're there. It's a crap shoot, really, but as soon as I'm done blogging, I'm going to check the webcams and see how things are progressing. We didn't have too many cabin choices left (apparently lots of other people had the same draw to mother nature), but we snagged one that looks pretty special.
We'll spend one night in Nasvhille on our way to Gatlinburg, and then Knoxville after Gatlinburg. We've got a few things planned to do, but we're just looking forward to a restful and leisurely pace. I'm eagerly anticipating "fall" weather. Memphis isn't quite there yet.
Okay. That's what I've been doing. I've done well with food until last night. We had BBQ. :( and I instantly regretted it due to the indigestion I took to bed with me. However, I'm thankful that I'm alive and well, and I have today to do things better than yesterday.
I would like to start off by thanking EP for their quick comments on my frustrations. I think it's great that they keep up with the users' opinions by reading the blogs. They appear to be hard at work and taking everything we say into consideration.
I probably should have just waited it out and been patient, but those problems just hit me at the wrong moment. Sorry for spreading a negative vibe, y'all. lol.
Well, I had a blog topic all ready to talk about, and now I can't remember what it is. I hate it when that happens. I'm just a wee bit tired this morning, and I'm not bringing it all together as clearly as I'd prefer. I had three amazing mornings of clarity, and then yesterday and today have sucked. I've tried to go to bed earlier, but falling asleep hasn't been as easy as usual. BF has to rub my back until I'm out. It's nice and I love it, but I don't like needing help like that to relax.
I finished the Twilight books earlier this week, and I can't remember if I mentioned that or not?? They were good. Book 4 was the best, I think. If possible, I would have read it cover to cover without stopping. It's a long one, though. There is some mourning that comes when I finish a book, and I have a little of that going on, but it's more because I miss looking forward to getting in bed to read. It's not the characters I miss so much this time as looking forward enjoying the book at night. I've got to get some more books.
BF and I are going to plan our vacation later today. We didn't do that on my days off a couple weeks ago because I was too consumed with reading. LOL. We decided against London for a bunch of different reasons, so we're doing a Haunted Tennessee vacation instead. Weird, huh? I think it will be fun. I'm looking forward to seeing parts of Tennessee that I wouldn't otherwise see.
My head is bobbing... I better go and make more coffee.
I'm giving it my best, but there are things about the EP changes that I just have to let out of my head. Before I get into that... because I just HAVE to get into that... I will say that I like how it looks and I'm not adverse to changes that make sense and contribute to the ease of use. Unfortunately, I'm not sure how these new things are making things easier to use.
Please be patient with me as I let this out. I need to vent.
I wrote Shelley a comment just a short time ago, and when she replied to it, I had no idea what she was talking about because it didn't show me the comment she was responding to and I couldn't seem to get to her blog to figure it out. I posted a few other comments, and I can't always keep everything straight, ya know?
I want to be able to read these things in my email just like it used to be, where it shows the blog entry and then the comment under it. Having to come to EP to read these things is getting to be seriously annoying. I often read my email from work on my cell phone, and all I keep seeing are these "private message" announcements without any way to read them in my email inbox. I hate that.
In the "last posts" section, when you click on the user name, it doesn't open in a new window. I keep having to page back in my browser to get back to the last posts because when you click on someone's name, they open in the same window. That is seriously annoying and excruciatingly time-consuming.
Okay... about the private message thing. When shelley left me the last comment, it didn't give me a link to her blog so I could immediately go and refresh myself on what I said to her. I spent five minutes click around trying to find her blog. I've since figured out that her blog is listed in the friends section, but I don't understand why her reply to my comment wouldn't just offer me a link to it.
Another thing... I paid for a gold membership and I would like the button back that tells me who visited my blog. It was the easiest way to keep up with commenting on the blogs of the people who had recently left me comments.... everyone's name in a nice little concise list where I don't have to go clicking around for an hour. This feature was offered as part of the gold membership, and I don't think it's appropriate to take away features we paid for.
There were certain features on the site that I am not sure why they changed. I would love to know why they would fix something that seemed to be working pretty smoothly.
Okay. I had to vent. I'll go back to trying to be patient while things are worked out with the new site.
Okay. I said change can be a good thing. I still believe that..... however, I'm feeling weirdly unsure and shy with the new changes. Like I don't quite want to come out of my shell. It's like meeting someone new... it takes time to figure out what to think about them, but you don't want to say too much right away.
That being said, I'm going to come here and try to blog, as usual. It might take me some time to get used to the new commenting structure, so if you don't hear from me, it doesn't mean I don't love ya. It means I'm reading your blogs and keeping up with your progress, but I'm still a little too timid to talk in front of the "new person."
So.... on with the blogging! A little more than a week ago, BF and I went to a mexican restaurant. At the end of our meal, they gave us these little envelopes that we weren't allowed to open until our next visit to the restaurant. Yesterday was our next visit, and when she opened up our envelope, it said that we would be eating dinner on them! It was a $50 coupon!! Naturally, we had to overeat to make sure they knew how much we truly enjoyed our gift!
I am being punished, though. My complexion is shouting out to the masses just how bad my ordering was. This is what I get. It's rather horrifying. It's amazing how when my face gets back to normal how easy it is to forget what made it so ugly. Okay. Enough of that.
I had to sent Tatumsmom and her mom to the university without me today , but I'm still planning to register at the small school. I need to hurry up and get all of that done. I'm still mildly terrified, but my terror is coming more from things that don't have much to do with actually going to school. It's more the stuff that could get in my way and/or prevent me from going to school. A few classes won't kill me. They just have to be at the right time of day. Or online. I just want to buy all the books, do my own home study and TEST OUT of everything! lol. I'm well-aware that's not how it works, but wouldn't it be nice? lol.
Okay. I've managed to blog even though my "surroundings" don't feel right with the larger typeface and colors. I'm still feeling a bit distracted by it all, but hopefully not for long.
BTW, don't our girls look great up there on the homepage?! Gotta love those before and after shots! Reminds me what I'm trying to do with myself.... change for the better!
Change is never easy to deal with, is it? I like the look of the new site, but I'm hesitant and leery as I click around trying to familiarize myself. I like being able to add friends right from their blog page. I like the friend updates on my homepage. There's a lot to like about it, but it's taking my eyes some time to adjust. I can't find the button that tells me who's visited my blog. Any other gold members know where that went?
I think everything looks good. Change can be a good thing and we must embrace it!
Well, I bailed out of BF's event today. I feel super shitty about it, too. But I imagine it's probably raining on them, and I'm not sure I'd want to spend the evening getting rained on. He's not sure he's coming home or staying the night over there. He rode with other people. This makes me feel even super shittier because had I gone, we would have driven our own car, and he'd be coming home tonight. He was very understanding and didn't want me to have to wander around uncomfortably "alone" while he worked, but that doesn't help my guilt much.
The other thing was the fact that I have work to do and didn't think it would be a good idea to be gone all day and night without a chance to work on it. Well, let me tell ya..... I worked about an hour.... then decided to read for a bit before taking a quick nap. Uhhh... that was five hours ago. No nap! I read for FIVE HOURS. I swear it felt like an hour and a half. I'm obsessed. I'm not quite as obsessed with the story as I am with FINISHING the book. It's taken over my life. I'm halfway through the fourth book, FINALLY, and thinking about just ditching the work thing and spending the next five hours finishing the darn thing so I can rid myself of it. Perhaps if I finish it, I'll be able to work???? Awful. If it's not an abundance of food, it's an abundance of something else. At least I'm not shopping. When that happens, it can be reallllly bad.
I feel so guilty. I was supposed to get tons of work done while BF was gone today. I'll hang my head in shame when I tell him how little I got done and that I skipped his event to lay on the couch all day and read. Instead of getting irritated or upset, he'll smile and tell me how happy he is to see me and ask me if I enjoyed the book. I've got a guilty conscience, though! I'm determined to work for another hour and have something to show I was productive during his absence.
Because of all the reading today, my eating was spot-on. I didn't feel tempted to eat when I wasn't hungry. I assume that's because I wasn't bored. (If I could just sit home and read EVERY day, I might actually lose weight!) ha!
I can't remember what I ate yesterday. My only memory is the lobster raviolis that BF brought home from work. Those things are so freakin yummy. The best part about them is that they satisfy me so much that I have no desire to eat any of the other things he brings home. Not even the buttery dinner rolls! The other good part is that they are a very small portion. Limited damage.
The closest I've gotten to exercise since restarting my meds is thinking about it. So sad. I hate how they make me so detached. I'm not as distracted by food as I usually am. I'm actually eating when I'm hungry and attempting to make sane choices. I don't have a desire for the normal foods I usually desire. I haven't wanted bbq at all.... or pizza... unless I make it myself, which I prefer to do because I used italian diced tomatoes instead of sauce, and it is YUM!
Well, this entry has ballooned into one very long ramble. I'm so sorry for those of who who stuck it out and read it all! lol.
