Down
I've been taking care that what I eat is nutritious. My stomach feels less round as a result. I'm having a few problems, though, and I think I need to work them out before it gets worse. My mood is dangerously low. I finished my book this afternoon and felt sad. Sad that it was over. Sad that I'd have to find something else to keep myself busy. Sad that I have work to do but I don't want to do it because it's the weekend and after working as much as I have been, I shouldn't have to work at all on the weekend.
I miss FG, and I know he's anxious to come home. I feel sad that my spirit isn't in as good a place as his is. When I think about the changes in his life recently, they just seem to make sense. Everything is falling into place for him. He's finding himself and working on himself and he's excited about things. He has the freedom to do this, and I envy that. His head is so clear right now and so at peace, and mine is a complete mess! Most of all, I don't want to drag him down when he gets home. I want both of us to be in a good place.
I'm not sure how to help myself right now. Shopping used to make me feel better, but I have no desire to shop. As a matter of fact, I can't see it possible to pull myself together enough to go to FG's mom's house today. I'm going to do it anyway, though. Until now, I was undecided. I think I have to go through the motions and at least give it a shot.
I'll browse the fabric at the fabric store and thumb through some kwik-sew patterns. I might buy a quilt book. Looking at quilts always seems to help me feel inspired. Perhaps I should start a quilting bee. lol.
I better go get ready before I change my mind. It feels like I'm about to climb a mountain. Depression hurts :(