Life

I am having a hard time with life it seems. It is hard to stay strong and not talk to Ryan. I still love him so much. He is being a pathetic prick and he keeps e-mailing me and calling me and texting me about how much he is sorry and he is so stupid and how he never wanted to hurt me, and that everything was just a "mistake" an that all he needs is "one more chance". It seriously makes my heart hurt. All his groveling is just so emotionally draining and I hate him for it..... I wish he would just be an asshole so I wouldnt feel so bad about being apart from him. I believe that he is sorry, but how can it be just a "mistake" if it has happened multiple times. All of his cheating and lying and talking to other girls and going out to bars and leaving me by myself.... those weren't mistakes, those were conscious decisions that he made because he thought that I wouldn't know or wouldn't say anything about it. If I took him back again (I already broke up with him once before because he was cheating on me with his ex girlfriend) then nothing is stopping him from hurting me again. UGHGHGHGH I really just want to punch him in the face. AND the girls he was with..... I am just so disgusted and it makes me question girls now a days. All of them knew he had a girlfriend, were absolutely HEINOUS, and either kissed him or had sex with him anyway..... absolutely disgusting. WHAT ARE PEOPLE THINKING?!?!?! I just don't understand, I really don't. I think that is why it is hard to let it go. Every time Ryan talks to me now, I want to tell him so much and just go off on him on all of the shit he has ever done to me, and I just have so many questions I need to know (or want to know) and I want to know WHY he did this and why, if he thinks i am so perfect and "the best girlfriend anyone could ever ask for" (his words), he would do this.

It's not just Ryan, it is mostly ryan, but I am just so stressed and everytime I try to sort things out, i feel like it just gets worse. It is just so exhasting it makes me want to stop trying.

hello

I read your post and wanted to write to you. I am sorry you are going through such a hard time. It sounds like you already gave him another chance. I would not go for yet another one. I know you love him, but he just does not treat you right. Like you said, it is not even a one-time thing. He has done it over and over again. Demand loyalty...I would not trust him again.

I am just a stranger and obviously this is not my business, but I do understand how you feel and i believe he may be a nice guy overall, but he has some issues that he needs to work on before he can ask for forgiveness. He needs to examine himself and suffer the consequences too. Why does he jeopardize your love for him? -For one, he thinks you will forgive him, but this time, I think you should be strong. There are other guys out there who will treat you right. I promise. You WILL get over him.

xxx
laura

Poor you

Well, I have to say, he sounds like a right shit.  You've given him every opportunity to turn his behaviour around, and he still hasn't - he doesn't deserve any more chances. 

But ... they're not all like that, I promise!  Do your best to move on and look after yourself for a bit, and then I'm sure you'll find someone who's devoted to you.  After all, you're gorgeous!!

U Don't Deserve It!

That is crap he is giving you and I know how hard it is to call it off with someone you love...but, trust me...there are plenty of other healthy fish in the sea!