01/03/2011 05:38
The day before I start my weight loss program.
My name is Jessica. I am 19 and am attending college regularly. I intend to use this blog as a way to vent about the frustrations of my everyday life and record my thoughts on my weight loss goals. As of right now I weigh the most I have ever weighed in my life. I've suffered with weight problems all of my life. Since I was little i've always been the big girl. I went on my first diet when I was in eighth grade. I went from a weight of 190 pounds to a wonderful 145 pounds. I was happy with myself. I had more confidence in myself and it also helped that boys were starting to notice me. I kept that weight for three years. I don't blame my boyfriend for my weight gain I take full responsibility for not keeping up with it. But I have been with my boyfriend for about three years now. When we first met I was a small 140 pounds. I was attractive and sexy I would consider. I still think he finds me attractive but I do worry that I have lost my good looks in gaining my weight back. We recently went on a cruise where I spent most of my time obsessing weather I looked better then the other girls on the boat. When we got home I knew I needed to make a change. Not only for me but for our relationship. So he wouldn't feel like he was dating someone who didn't love themselves. Don't get me wrong I have confidence in myself. I know I can be attractive and I fully intend to do that but to feel better about myself and boost my self esteem I am doing this. I plan to lose a good portion of my weight before my birthday. I want to lose 70 pounds. I don't know if this is a ridiculous goal but I intend to do it. Wish me luck and I'll check in often!