Days Like Yesterday
My goodness. Some days just come and bite your attempts at dieting in the butt.
Yesterday, I ate like there was no tomorrow. I ate like there was a bottomless pit inside me and all the tortilla chips in the world could not satisfy my hunger. I ate until I was full and then I ate some more. I am surprised my belly did not pop with the strain of all the food I stuffed into it, spraying a noxious mixture of snack foods and burrito across the staff room walls.
Yes folks. Yesterday, I suffered an attack from the Great Snack Monster. The Great Snack Monster preys on the unsuspecting soul at numerous times - during periods of distraction or times of great emotion or even during boredom - but most often arrives riding on its beast of burden, the PMS Pony. These two demons are going to be the bane of my existence for the next few days. I would like them to leave, I have kindly suggested that they are Not Welcome Here and pretty soon I will have to resort to some form of violence to kick them to the curb.
The "Welcome" mat is gone. The canapes have been consumed. The well has run dry. It is time for the party to pack up and go.