I keep thinking about that saying - the one that says idiocy/stupidity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. And yet, with this whole menu planning/workout thing, I feel like that's exactly what I'm doing - the same thing over and over expecting different results.
The thing is - that's the only way it's going to become a habit. I need to keep doing the same things over and over until it's just part of my day, like eating and writing and sleeping. Unfortunately, I've been battling my hormones for the past two weeks, and that's where I always fall down, it seems. I need to figure out how to make these two things a habit *before* my hormones go haywire next time, so I have at least half a chance at not sabotaging myself. I really don't know any way to do that other than just muscle my way through. I do hope that if I get going with the workouts *now*, my hormones will naturally be more balanced next time. One can hope, right?
I've also had sort of an infrastructure problem. I want to get my main meals onto index cards to make menu planning easier...I even have the cards, and I rarely use a recipe so it's not like it would be hard to do. I just haven't had the time. So this weekend we're going out of town for an overnight trip, and guess what I'll be doing in the car while we're driving? Yep - I'll be making menu cards part of the way.
Even the yoga went by the wayside last week, so starting tomorrow, it's back at it. Yoga in the mornings, and I'm going to workout Tues/Weds/Thursday this week in the evenings. Maybe even Friday, if nothing gets in the way.
So...here I go again. Hopefully I'll get different results this time.
I'm going to workout tonight. And I think it will surprise you to learn what actually motivated me (you know, aside from my clothes being too tight, no shorts that fit, and just generally being uncomfortable in my own skin). In any case, I've decided that I need to *take* time out of my night to workout...even if it means pushing something else out of the way. In this case, I'll be pushing edits to a manuscript I'm working on back into the "less optimal, later" writing zone. But I need to *make* this important enough to *take* time for, no matter what.
Tonight we went to my in-laws for my FIL's birthday dinner. And I had to listen to my MIL go on and on about how skinny the girl in the movie "When in Rome" is. And how skinny someone else she knows is. It wasn't flattering, and she's always been that way. She's overweight too, and has a "thing" about people who are at a healthy weight - she talks down about them all the time. When I married my husband, I was a size 6 and healthy (135lbs or so - we'd been doing the Atkins diet). She gave me the hardest time about being "too skinny" (135 is actually towards the top of my healthy weight range, but it was all muscle. I like bodybuilding, or used to.). I sometimes wonder if those comments haven't contributed to my attitude towards weight these days...my "acceptance" of being heavier and out of shape. It certainly stopped the comments when I gained weight - I wonder if it was a protective mechanism of sorts?
In any case, it motivated me for some reason. It made me want to work out, and be one of those healthy girls that she deems "too skinny". Not because I particularly want to hear those comments directed at me again...and honestly, I don't know why - maybe it's just my inner rebel again. Whatever the reason though, I'm headed to the basement for 30 minutes on the treadmill tonight.
This week's Dinner Menu Monday: Burgers & macaroni salad Tuesday: Pork roast & cole slaw Wednesday: Ravioli w/red sauce Thursday: Casserole Friday: Pizza night
Yes, I know it's Monday. With the holiday weekend, I caught up a bunch of stuff, but managed to procrastinate even longer with the menu plan thing. Why is it so hard for me to just make a plan? It's not like I'm trying to adjust the types of food we eat, I'm just trying to serve up smaller portion sizes and get back to exercising. I am trying to plan better for lunches too...and we should have leftovers every day for lunch except Tuesday, which is better than average. My husband would be sad if I cut out hot dogs altogether.
Maybe this next weekend will be the one where menu planning isn't a fate worse than cleaning...well...anything? I don't know what my deal is here, but I'm determined to get over it.
In other news, my attempts to work out have been pathetic at best - and I have lots more excuses for last week, but the fact is, I could still *make* time. Since I'm having difficulties, I'm making this week's goal just 1 workout. More would be better, but if I get at least 1, I'll consider it a victory. Then next week I can move up to 2. Baby steps. In addition though, I'm going back to sit-ups/push-ups/squats every morning before my shower. Not really a workout, but something to get the muscles working and burning more fat.
The weather is warm, and I have no shorts that fit. I refuse to go buy more clothes (partly because I hate clothes shopping, no matter what size I am). Something's gotta give...and it really has to be my laziness before the buttons on my pants.
Onward! Here's hoping for better news to report next week...
This Week's Dinner Menu Monday: Spaghetti Tuesday: Chicken Enchiladas Wednesday: Steaks Thursday: Pizza Friday: Shrimp Stir Fry
After last week's non-event with planning meals and working out, I signed up for Menu Planning Central, a service I used several years ago to help with the menus. I don't use all the menus of course, but it gets the mind flowing in the right direction, and I get to try some new recipes when I see something that sounds good. I figured that would be enough to motivate me on the right path.
Wrong.
Sunday night at 12:30am (I guess that would be Monday morning, wouldn't it?), I finally made myself type out a list of four entrees plus our weekly pizza night on a desktop sticky note before bed. I didn't even want to do that - it was sheer force of will (and probably being too tired to argue with myself) that got it done. After I had it typed out, I first marveled at how easy it was when I stopped thinking so much about it, and then I put it on my calendar - one meal per day, and synced it with my PDA so I'd have the menu with me all week.
Strange things have happened since then. Lunches are resolving themselves with leftovers, so we are not eating hot dogs every other day. I find this a step in the right direction. I knew when I was going to put the chicken in the crock pot, so it was actually thawed out on time for once. Normally we have pizza every Friday night, but had to switch it to Thursday due to other activities...but no big deal, 'cause now I know what we're having instead on Friday, and that I need to get shrimp out of the freezer Thursday night.
I haven't had too much arguing from myself on the plan this week, so far, so good. I'm just waiting for my inner rebel to rise up and refuse to follow the plan, but I'd be just fine if that didn't happen this week. I've actually quite enjoyed the organization, the not having to figure out what's for dinner every night, etc. Now if I could just get the menu plan done earlier...
Workouts are another (sad) story. But that's fodder for another post...
I'm behind. I got distracted several times last weekend, and as a result I'm not only behind on blog posts (for my main blogs), but I also didn't get my menu plan done. That created a chain reaction for the week...blog posts not done on the weekend like normal means they spill over into the weeknights, which effectively erased my chances of working out Monday & Tuesday night. Blog posts moving into the weeknights also kind of ate up my time for menu planning, though I do have a rough idea in my head, and have been following that for dinners the last two nights. So while it's not as good as it could be, it's better than nothing. We're eating a lot of coleslaw this week, because bags of cabbage mix were on sale 2 for 1. LOL
Next weekend, I'm going to schedule a set time to create a menu plan on Saturday night. I'll put it in my PDA with an alarm set to remind me every week. I do my grocery shopping Sunday mornings, so I'll have the plan done early in case I need something outside the norm for a recipe.
I'll muddle through the rest of this week, and hope for workout time tomorrow night. I know I need to make it a priority, but it's so hard with everything else I've got going on now...must do better at that.
If I'm really going to take this weight loss thing seriously (which I am), I need to be more efficient in my daily schedule. My biggest excuse for not eating right and not working out is the same as many others: I just don't have time. Which is a blatant lie, for me at least. Because the fact is, there's time if I make time. To this point I've just been too lazy, or I've had other things that I let become higher priorities.
I resent the time it takes to be healthy.
Yep, you heard me. It's kind of ironic, since I worked in a gym for 10 years when I was younger. It's far easier to work out though when you're in that environment all day, every day. Goes with the job. It takes a bunch more effort now, and I do resent that. I need to just get over myself.
Now that I lead a fairly sedentary life, I have to kick it up a notch. Or three. So this week's goal is simply to plan out all of our meals, and block off workout time every evening. I always struggle with menu planning, half the time not wanting to eat what I planned out several days ago, but I'm just going to have to suck it up (um, so to speak). Planning ahead will give us better variety at the very least, and if I know what I'm making before I even come through the door, I'll get right on it after work instead of waffling around trying to figure out what to make. It will make it harder to do the "I'm tired, let's get tacos on the way home" thing too, since I'll have a plan and meat thawed out waiting to be cooked. Self-sabotage in the right direction. Portion sizes are another biggie, but I'm working on that.
So yeah. A menu plan. Posted here no later than Sunday night. Gonna do it.
When my paternal grandmother turned 50, she found a lump on the side of her neck. Non-hodgkins lymphoma was the diagnosis, and back then, there was no cure. Through treatments and a move South to Texas, her cancer went into remission and she lived a long, more or less healthy life until just a few years ago.
The week of my Dad's 50th birthday, he found a lump on his neck as well. The diagnosis was the same as his mother's had been, and a bunch of radiation and other treatments followed. Today my dad is cancer free, but he has serious tooth and jaw problems from the radiation treatments.
Both my grandmother and my father were overweight at the time, and had been for awhile. New studies have come out with early findings that non-Hodgkins lymphoma may be at least partly influenced by weight. As I watch the scale creeping up year after year, I get more and more worried that I, too, will get a lump on my neck for my 50th birthday, and all the harsh drugs that go with it.
I'm 35. That gives me 15 years to get my weight down to a healthy level again, and maintain healthy eating and workout habits in hopes of avoiding the 50th birthday gift that seems to be tradition in my family. I really need to get serious about this if I'm to have a chance of cheating the cancer gene, or at least not triggering it with my diet and exercise. If I can't avoid it, at least I'll be healthy when it hits me.
I also have a personal goal to live to 100 years old. Not just live, but be healthy. Will I make it? Doesn't really matter, if it motivates me to stay as healthy and active as I can. :-)
So that's my story...here's to The Longevity Project - both mine and yours.
