Crazy Sunday

Ok, so have been running around like a chicken with its head cut off today.  My dad is coming Wednesday night to help me with my house all weekend, so the house needs to be IMMACULATE for him.  So I've been doing laundry, washing the kitchen floor and cleaning the kitchen all morning.  I finally went to the gym today, and made some lunch.

Annoying part of this WW thing.  This Amy's Southwestern Vegetable soup (sooooooo good) is only 2 points per serving.  But because there's a bunch of fiber in it, when I had the whole can (2 servings) the points went up to 5.5.  ANNOYING.  Just shows me that i should only have one serving. 

OK, need to put away laundry and change the sheets. 

Woo woo

OK, two big wins in my opinion since I last posted.  One is a personal life win, and one is a weight-loss journey win.

1)  I went to see Spiderman 3 by myself.  That's right folks - all by myself.  I had been hung up on not seeing any movies lately, since it seems that all of my friends just want to drink and not go see a flick.  I had wanted to go see Spiderman 3, and it had been kinda bumming me out, because my ex and I would go see every movie in the theatre that was worth seeing.  So after taking a magnificent nap and cleaned today, I just felt like going.  So I did.  And it was pretty cool.  Although it would have been nice to have someone to hold my hand for it, I was OK sitting there by myself.  Yeah for me and my independence.

2) I was STARVING by the time the movie was over, and I only had one point left for the day.  So I ate green beans.  I didn't eat a snack bar, nor did I cave and buy Milk Duds at the theatre.  I just finished green beans.  And even though I'm still hungry, I think I ate them too fast, so I'm letting my body realize I just inhaled a can of green beans.  Then I will reassess if I need something else. 

Oh, as a side note, I'm still pining over D.  This is way annoying - why am I so damn picky?  I went on a date last night with A DOCTOR and came out going "eh."  I'll probably give him a second chance, since he's A DOCTOR but I don't see myself wanting to make out with him.  D, on the other hand, I think about making out with all the time.  All the damn time.  I'm going to have to tell him soon.  This "what if" is killing me.  But my weight is kinda holding me back.  I'm almost as scared of him saying "yes" than I am of him saying "no."  I mean, if I said "yes", I would eventually have to get naked.  Lord almighty, I can't think of a scarier scenario.  I'd have to turn off the lights AND blindfold him.  And try to hide my beer gut. 

Oh, and another side note, I seriously feel GREAT off gluten.  I cheated on my business trip and felt like poop.  I'm off it again and feel great.  Screw gluten - it's worth the extra effort and money to feel good like this.  Wahoo. 

Grateful for many things

So even though I'm up this week, I'm OK with it.  I was offsite Sunday through Thursday in a hotel doing training for work, and it was AWFUL.  They had sit down meals 3X a day, so counting points went to the wayside.  It wasn't even like a buffet where I could eat what I want - plated meals 3X a day.  I tried to talk to the hotel person to say I needed gluten-free meals, but they kept telling me not to eat the bread.  Thanks - I'm well aware of that.  So I ended up eating a bunch of gluten, and felt sluggish and tired ALL WEEK.  We started early everyday (breakfast at 7:30) and had required night events with more food and more drinking.  So no gym time.  So all in all, this week sucked. 

But here's the learning I've gathered this week:
1) I am so grateful that i don't travel for my job.  I love routine, I love my own bed, I love making my own food.  I love having my own gym minutes away.  I love having everything at my fingertips, and not realizing too late that I forgot my brush or my floss.  So so so grateful that I don't travel for my job.  I kept thinking about noodles and all her business trips - she is so strong for managing to stick to the plan even when traveling.

2) I'm grateful that I didn't break 170.  This week is going to be good so I'm sure I'll be down this week.

3) In my WW meeting, we talked about cravings and urges.  A lot of people talked about being surrounded by husbands/kids food and wanting to eat the "normal" stuff around the house.  I am sooooo grateful that I am single right now.  The only stuff in the house is mine.  There is no ice cream for the kids.  There is no regular bacon, just my turkey bacon.  I am completely in control of what's in the refrigerator, and I love it.

So I'm going to have a good week this week.  Just watch me. 

Argh

OK, still scale at 169.5. 

WTF. 

I was seriously at 167.5 on Friday morning before I drank.  Would I really gain 2 pounds from 4 glasses of wine?

I have got to stop getting on the scale so damn much.  It's so addicting. 

So I'm leaving this afternoon for a weeklong business trip.  I was worried about food, but I told them that I'm on a gluten-free diet, so the hotel hosting us is making me a separate plate everyday for breakfast/lunch.  Dinner should be a challenge, but I'll figure it out.  Going to try to work out at the gym before the day. 

Ugh - will try to chug water this week.  Hope this mysterious 2 pounds disappears before my WI this Saturday.  Boo. 

Why do I drink?

Ugh - I feel like poop today because I went out with my friends last night.  I haven't drank in awhile, so 4 glasses of wine did me in.  (I can't drink beer while I'm on this GF (gluten-free) diet.)  I'm trying to chug water to make myself feel better, but it's not working.  I'm about to make myself go to the gym, because I NEED TO even though I feel like poop.  I'll just have to take it easy. 

So my weigh-in was supposed to be this morning, but I didn't make it in due to how crappy I felt at 8 AM when the alarm went off.  I did weigh myself on my own scale yesterday morning, and it was 167.5.  But when I weighed myself this morning when I got up, it was 169.  I'm guessing this is the wine and sodium weight.  So I'm trying to chug water, get to the gym, and hopefully that's a fluke. 

And I'm still in love with D.  It was his birthday last night, and I seriously almost told him how much I like him.  Lordy - he is so awesome.  Ugh - totally in love.  Boo. 

OK, time for the gym.  This is going to be painful, but I deserve the pain for drinking too much last night.  Blegh. 

So annoyed

Had this happen twice today - thought I had bought something that had a certain amount of calories, fat and fiber and realized MUCH LATER that there were actually 2 servings per that package. 

Why do food people do this to me????  I mean, seriously, if it's an instant bowl of soup - why would there two servings?  Or a microweable meal - why two servings?  Clearly only one person is going to consume that whole thing - why not put the full amounts??

So annoyed - never would have eaten that Thai Kitchen (Rice) Noodle Soup if I had thought there were 5 points, not 3.  Boo. 

So now I have to have a smaller dinner than I thought.  Double boo. 

Another good thing about WW

And I swear, I'm not being paid to endorse WW or anything.  I'm just thinking positively about this change that I've made and I want to share.

When you sign up for WW, your first mini-goal is 10% of your current weight.  I weighed in on 5/5 at 169.8, so my first mini-goal is 16 pounds. 

Thinking about 16 poinds is a lot easier than thinking about the 30 I still need to lose.  When I signed up for JC in January, I was at my all-time high of 181.5 pounds.  (I swear that I will never get that high again - even if/when I get pregnant.)  My ultimate goal weight was (and still is) 140 pounds.  It would put me at a BMI of 23, and it's always stuck in my head as my perfect weight.  I remember being 140, and I liked it there.  But it was pretty damn daunting to think about having to lose 42 pounds!!!  I remember when I was at 160 and thinking about how hard it would be to lose 20!!

So my point is, I like this whole "horse before the cart" thing.  I get a little key ring when I lose 10% (or 16 pounds).  So that's what I'm aiming for right now. To get my key ring.  To lose 16 pounds.  A lot less scary than 30 pounds. 

JC should consider giving everyone mini-goals to begin with.  I know a lot of women do mini-goals of their own, but maybe it should be pushed down from the JCC's.  Just a thought.  But I really liked this approach.

Day 5 and still truckin'

Still here - doing well.  I bought this really AWESOME book that you take to the grocery store with you and gives you normal products by normal brands that are gluten free.  It gets sooooo confusing sometimes, so it's nice to know that someone else has already checked that the vegetable broth in water-packed tuna by Bumblebee is gluten-free. Phew. 

I'm actually enjoying WW to be honest.  I like that I get my variety back, so it's more fun to think about what I'm going to have for dinner.  And I really like the whole counting points thing.  It is a way better approach, then counting calories, because it takes fat and fiber into consideration.  A 100 calorie snack with 0 fiber would be 2 points while a 100 calorie snack with fiber would be 1 point.  And I like that if I want a second 1 point snack bar, I can have the damn snack bar and not feel bad about it like I would have on JC if I had two "snacks."  I'm still trying to get two fruits a day (like JC) and 2 dairy a day (like JC) but it took me awhile to figure out if my favorite Yoplait had gluten.  It doesn't! 

To answer noodles' question, I am both doing online and going to meetings.  They're running a promotion right now called Montly Pass, which is $40 a month for all the online stuff (like the eTools, which I'm obsessed with) and unlimited meetings.  I went to my first meeting last Saturday, and really liked it.  It's like being on a JC message board, only in real life. I realized that although the WW leader (or JCC) is knowledgeable and everything, I really gain the insight and value from the other members.  And you get prizes in front of everyone when you lose.  I kinda like that.  A whole group of people clapping that I lost 5 pounds (when I do!). 

And let's not kid ourselves - other than the special gluten-free food, I'm glad to not be buying real food that's cheap.  Gotta love cheap tuna in a can.  3 points for the whole can!  And now I put salsa in it (salsa has no points!). 

I also received in the mail "The Gluten Connection" and skimmed it last night.  Although it's a bit over the top (eating gluten-free could cure cancer! - an exageration, but not far from it) I could believe parts of it whole-heartedly.  Like the fact that we're not eating the same wheat that our grandparents were.  Wheat has been bioengineered (like everything else) to have 3X more gluten, to make it better for bread and doughnuts and pizza crust and all the yummy food I miss.  And cavemen didn't eat gluten - everytime you hear someone talk about enriched flour - the bad guy is gluten!  And let's face it - I probably shouldn't drink as much beer as I do.  I'd probably drink less if I could only drink wine or water. 

So enjoying WW a lot, but I still love JC.  The convenience, the idiot-proof-ness.

Oh, I also forgot to mention that on WW, you get a weekly points allowance, as well as a daily.  And I can divide them any way that I want to - evenly across the days, or all one day for a meal out or night at the bars with my friends.  Wahoo. 

Ok, will keep you posted.  Feeling good about being on this path again.  I needed a change to restart the weight-loss engine, if you get me.  Wish me luck!

Day 3 and Doing Well

Well, it's Day 3 of my gluten-free diet, and I'm doing pretty well.  They have plenty of gluten-free products out there, but they are expensive as hell.  (Actually, no more expensive than JC, but I hate spending that much money at a grocery store as opposed to JC.)  I also bought some GF (gluten free) condiments and GF bread.  The GF waffles I had this morning were really crumbly (since it's the gluten that "glues" everything together) but super high in points.  So I'll finish the box and never get them again. 

In good news, I have not had any digestive issues in the past three days.  I really really REALLY hope this has an effect on my energy.  It's just silly how tired I have been all the time lately. 

Ok, watching some TV and figuring out what I'm making for dinner.  Think I'll saute some shrimp - low points!

I'm back

Well, the last month was interesting.  Super super super stressful at work, some health issues, and boy complications. 

The point is: I'm back. 

The health issues (major digestive issues, chronic fatigue, headaches everyday) still haven't been figured out.  All my bloodwork comes back normal and my doctor keeps wanting to prescribe medicine for my IBS and doesn't know how to explain my chronic fatigue.  (I am sleeping all the time ladies.  All the damn time.  More than a 24 year should need to sleep.  I've been staying in on Friday nights because I'm soooooo tired from the week.  Last night I went to bed at 8PM no joke.) 

So my mom was actually the one to suggest that I might have a food allergy that is causing all this.  So we did some research, and the likely culprit is gluten.  I don't drink milk, so it's not lactose, and the gluten allergy symtoms fit.  So even though my food allergy panel came back clean, a moderate allergy wouldn't show up from the blood test.  So the only thing to do is to try a gluten-free diet for at least a month and see if I feel better.

What is gluten?  Gluten is the elastic protein in wheat, rye and barley.  It's elasticity is why French break holds together, why angel-food cakes rise so hight and why Einstein bagels are so wonderfully doughy.  in fact, gluten comes from the same Latin root as glue.  Think of gluten as the glue of wheat, rye and barley. 

Does anyone else see the problem in this?  1) Gluten is in everything.  Literally everything.  Beyond the obvious like bread, pasta, pretzels, cake etc....  gluten is also in anything they add flour to.  Like sauces, gravies, frozen dinners, lunchmeat, the list goes on.  2) Gluten is in EVERYTHING that Jenny makes.  Literally everthing.  So I am off Jenny for a month.  Boo.

So I decided to join WW and count points as I eat my gluten-free meals.  I never got to the MOMO stage in Jenny, so exchanges are way too confusing for me.  Points are easy.  WW eTools are easy. 

The good news is tha I managed to maintain while I was in hiatus this last month.  My official weigh-in at WW was 169.8, but I'll round up to 170 since my home scale only does half pounds.  I'm on day 1 of WW, and liking it so far.  Trying to keep JC in mind, like getting 2 fruits a day, one "snack" and veggies to volumize.  I'm just eating a Glutino Gluten-Free breakfast bar instead of the JC blueberry muffin.  Or eating an Amy's Gluten-Free (free of lots of stuff in fact) frozen dinner instead of JC.  And taking it easy at dinner, like tuna with gluten-free bread (which tastes like poop if you want to know.)

One day at a time. 

And if anyone else wants to know about the boy-drama, it's annoying.  I still like D a lot, but trying to decrease my emotional investment, in case it doesn't pan out.  It appears that the only way anything will happen is if I say "I like you - we should grab dinner" and I'm not sure I can jeopardize our dynamic in our friend-circle to say that.  We'll see.

And jackass C has entered the picture again.  (He's the one that I really really really liked after my break-up.  We hooked up when I was most vulnerable, and then he pulled the rug from underneath me, blaming his own breakup, and telling me he didn't like me that way.  Jackass.)  So he's gotten kinda friendly at work, giving me too much attention everyday and kinda freakin' me out.  Then he tried to kiss me two weeks ago.  Luckily, he was wasted and I don't think he remembers me being "What the EFF are you doing?"  So we're normal at work, although he stops by my desk way too much.  I feel like he's lonely, and thus defaulting to me.  I am not a default.  Nor am I interested.  So boo.

Ok - that's my life.  Hope you guys still remember me!