Soooooo tired

So it's only 11:30 and I'm exhausted.  Literally exhausted.  I didn't get enough sleep the last two nights, not to mention that my trainer kicked my arse at the gym last night.  So I think I'm going to forgoe the gym tonight to get to bed early.  Like, insanely early. 

Trying to chug water though, since my WI is tomorrow morning.  Wish me luck!

Good day

I def. had a good day today - stayed on track all day and didn't give into temptation.  Am meeting my trainer tonight at the gym too, so will get my exercise in too.  Wahoo.

I really really want to see a loss on Wednesday morning.  Especially since I stayed the same weight last week.  I would love love love to drop below 160.  To see 150-something.  Even if it were 159.5.  That would seriously be amazing. 

I have to say, I've been doing pretty awesome during the week.  It's when I have dates with N or go out with my friends on weekends that I completely fall off the wagon.  Still need to figure out how to handle these situations better.

All about the new boy

So I've been seeing this new guy named N.  We met on match.com about two months ago, and been seeing each other ever since. 

The stats: He's 29 (I'm 24).  He's never been married and doesn't have kids.  He's the oldest of two (like me) and is from a small town in Indiana.  He's an attorney (civil litigation) and went to IU for both undergrad and law school. 

Best things about him: We get along RIDICULOUSLY well.  As in, we can talk and talk and talk and never get bored.  We laugh a lot, and really enjoy each other's company.  He's super smart, super ambitious and really has his life together (thank god).  He's really considerate (does super sweet things for me) and is genuinely a great guy.  He's also super affectionate, which is awesome. 

Things that are keeping me from falling down the rabbit hole: He's not physically my type.  First and foremost, he's skinny.  Like, probably weighs less than me skinny.  But I'm trying to get skinnier anyway, so I'm trying not to get too wrapped up in that.  Secondly, he's not overally cute.  Not unattractive, but def. not someone who I would see in a bar and want to approach me.  You know what I mean?  We definetely have chemistry, which is good, but sometimes I look at him, and think "should I be with someone cuter?"  I know that's a horrible thing to admit, but I'm just being honest.  Thirdly, he definitely has some dorkish tendencies.  That's probably the biggest difference between N and my ex-fiance: my ex oozed sex appeal.  Oozed confidence.  Completely swept me off my feet with his sexiness and arrogance and his moves. 

Bottom line - N's got way more pros than cons.  He's really into me and it's fantastic.  We have a lot in common and we have a lot of fun together.  I think I would be completely shallow to stop seeing him just because I'm not in lust with him.  And like I said, we have chemistry.  So I'll keep seeing him and see how things go. 

Good weekend

So I had a absolutely fantastic weekend - which was super important - because yesterday was supposed to be my wedding day.  (In case you're new to my blog, I broke off my engagement in August of 2006.  We did have a wedding date set, which was yesterday.)

Side note: I've been seeing this guy (let's call him N) for almost two months now.  More on him later.  I think I'll do an entire post on him. 

So it was really important that I had a good weekend, which I did.  I went out with friends on Friday night, and ended up drunk texting N almost all night.  Then I went to dinner and a movie with N last night and we had a really good night. 

On a side note though, I really really need to get back on the saddle with this weight loss thing.  I do FANTASTIC during the week (if I say so myself) but weekends suck.  Between drinking and dates with N, my measly 23 points go to the wayside.  I just need to get to the gym today and get moving!

Phew - I didn't gain

Have had a bad week this past week with stress and binging and eating like poop.  Have done a decent job with the exercising, so that's at least good.  Was super-scared about getting on the scale this morning, but luckily, it was the same weight as last week.  So no gain!  I'll take it!

Ok, work is killing me so must get back.  I promise to update soon and let everyone know how I'm doing in more detail. 

Two big wins for me today

Had an absolutely horrendous day at work today.  The "I want to bawl at my desk" horrendous day at work.  So stressed. 

Win Number 1:
When it got really bad at the end of the day, all I wanted to do was to bury my face in the Goldfish on my coworkers desk.  (Goldfish are a major trigger food for me.  I eat handful after handful after handful.  My coworker joked that I ate the entire aquarium.  I laughed, even though it really stung that someone else noticed my binging on Goldfish.)  So instead of grabbing for that big box, I ate the apple I had brought that day.  I was surly and hating life the entire time I chewed on it, but I was happy afterwards that I didn't cave.  Yeah me.

Win Number 2:
I finally left work at 6:30, knowing that I had HOURS left of work to do.  I decided to leave work, drive home, eat dinner, GO TO THE GYM, and then finally log in at home to get back to work.  And that's exactly what I did.  I'm sitting here sweaty after 30 minutes on the elliptical, and getting ready to log on and crank out some work.  Yeah me. 

Tomorrow should be an easy day, especially since I'm meeting Jamie my trainer after work.  Saturday is another story, but I'll get to that tomorrow.  Gotta get back to work!

First training session - awesome

Met with Jamie my trainer for the first time tonight, and felt really good.  I did 30 minutes on the elliptical before she got there, and we did a full body workout (moderate intensity) so she could figure out my weights and reps and stuff.  It felt good to have her telling me how to correct my posture and do the movements right, as well as what machines to do and everything.  I'm really glad that I'm investing in myself, and I'm excited for my next session on Friday.  Wahoo!

I'm also watching Biggest Loser on DVR.  I think I need to get addicted to this show.  Great motivation - if they can lose 200 pounds, I can lose 20. 

20 pounds down!!! 20 more to go!!!

Weighed in this morning (in my birthday suit, as always) and I officially weight 161.5 lbs.  This is exactly 20 pounds less than my all time high of 181.5 (which was right around New Year's). 

I feel so freakin' good. 

Last night, I went and supported my friends in the basketball game, but turned down going out to eat, and went home to eat a tuna sandwich.  I went one point over for the day (ate 24 instead of 23) but no biggie.  I actually had plans to go to the gym, but literally fell asleep at 7:30PM last night.  And I slept through the night until my alarm went off at 6 this morning.  So clearly I needed the sleep and I shouldn't feel bad about not going to the gym.

Tonight is my first official night with my trainer.  I'm super excited, especially to get into the 150's!!  I literally can't remember the last time I was in the 150's, but here I come!

Hope everyone has a great day and I'll report back after my first training session. 

Good day so far

So I had a great day yesterday and am halfway through a great day today.  I met with my new trainer last night for our "meet and greet' and to talk about goals and expectations and all that.  I'm really really excited to start working with her, and plopped down a big check to really invest in this.  My first real session (where I'll sweat) is tomorrow night, so I'll be sure to fill you all in.

After having a really great day so far, I'm really torn about going to this basketball game after work today.  I know that they'll all eat out afterwards, so besides the whole "having to make a hard choice in terms of food", I'll also be choosing not to go to the gym.  I think I'm going to bail - I really just want to go home, eat my tuna sandwich and hit the elliptical.  I think that's what's going to make me feel the best, so that's what I'll do.

I'm back

So my last post was in May.  It's almost October. 

Oops.

The good thing is that I've maintained/lost a little since May.  My official WI day is Wednesday, so this Wednesday I'll repost my current weight.  I'm hoping it's closer to 160 than 165, but we'll see.  Frankly I will die of happiness if it's 161.5, considering my highest weight ever was 181.5 in January. 

So what has happened since May?  Nothing much.  My doctor and I have decided that I have a medium gluten intolerance, which means it won't do anything serious like destroy my intestines, but it will give me headaches and pooping problems.  After a month, I decided I'd rather have the headaches and constipation than live without gluten.  So then I fell off the wagon with WW, but last week resigned up for WW online.  I starting going back to the gym last week as well, and even have my first meeting with a personal trainer tonight.  I'm really really ready for a change, and it's going to happen this time.

As for my personal life, it's picked up a bit.  I had a ton of more boy drama since May (same players, same 'effing game) and got fed up and signed up for match.com again.  Actually managed to find someone who I'm pretty compatible with, and we've been seeing each other for about a month.  That's a whole 'nother story though and I'll get in to that later.

So I'm back with a vengeance.  Watch out world.