Am I vain?

I have had 3 children. My first pregnancy, I gained about 30 pounds. I finally lost it when he was around 7 or 8. Hard to call it baby weight at that point. WIth my second pregnancy,I gained 70 pounds. This was the one that pushed me into the 200 zone! The weight was hard to lose. Whoever said breastfeeding helps you to lose weight... lied. It did not happen for me. Then before I even had a chance to  try to lose more weight, I was pregnant again with #3. This time I gained about 30 pounds again and got up to 250!!!! WOW.

So after 3 kids and being up and down on the scales, the shape of my body has taken a toll. I know that if I lose weight , some of the issue will go away. However, my boobs will not get back to where the used to be and I can tell that my stomach will have issues.  I have talked to my hubby and if I can get or shall I say, WHEN I get down to my goal weight, I can have plastic surgery.

I do not want huge, porn star boobs or anything. I naturally have a full C or D cup anyway ( depending on my weight). I just want them to be perky again. I would love to be able to wear something without a bra. NOT THAT I EVER WOULD! Those days are long gone. I just want some perk back for the girls.  Of course, my husband jokes that at 40 they are supposed to be down by my belly button. HA! HA! 

I also don't want the flap of skin hanging down towards my girly parts.  I want to have a nice, flat stomach. One that I can put pants on and not feel like I have to "tuck" my tummy into.

Part of the reason I am losing weight is to be "hot". I want to feel good about myself. I want to feel good or great naked. I think if I lose, WHEN ,  I lose the weight, if I have to look in the mirror each day and see sagging skin, I won't feel good.

Call me vain, but in my opinion, all that matters is how I feel about it. I know there are bigger problems in the world other than if I have great boobs or a flat tummy. For me though, I think it would make a difference.

On a side note, I had a great day yesterday. I walked for 45 minutes and made pretty good food choices overall. I had a slip or two, but it is a process and I am getting there.

HOpe you all have a great day.