Hike the mountain

Crazy summer days

Thursday, December 7, 2006 00:09:20

So I think I did pretty good last week, did 4 bike rides and played softball on Friday. Got sick on Friday, was just tired and not hungry. Finally eat three meals today, although I'm still tired.

We took a hike around the marsh this morning, I carried my son for a better workout. Minus the mesquito swarms it was nice. Even saw a deer.

My dad is coming to visit this week, and the day he leaves my finace's mother and brother are arriving for a two week stay. So I don't know how well I'll do this month. I talked more with him about how he needs to support me with my weight lose, and for him to stop bringing me food. He said he'll try. We shall see. It will be hard with guests here.

Also, I don't know how reliable this is, but I weighed myself on a scale at Wally world and it said I was 220 lbs. That means I have gained weight, that makes me so sad. I could have sworn I had lost weight or at least gained muscle, but burned fat. I didn't think I weighed that much. I need to lose it, I'm going crazy being this fat, I just want to stop eating. I feel so disgusting, no wonder my finace is not sexually interested in me, why would he be.

Sorry for the pity party.

I hope you all are having a good week.

Comments(2)

Good start to the week

Thursday, December 7, 2006 00:02:19

This morning we took a 5-6 mile bike ride. Felt like I was peddling through mud, my body is just so sore and worked, but it was good. Took the hard way home, up and down a lot of hills.

Finace is really sabatoging my diet by having us stop off at IHOP, although I thought I did ok with my order. But then he just brought home Wendy's for dinner, after I had already cooked something. I've really got to sit down and talk with him again, no food rewards only flowers and nick naks.

Hope you all had a good Monday.

Comments(1)

Ah biking we shall go

Tuesday, December 5, 2006 22:09:17

So this week has been the best week for me physically.
I have gone on 4 long (40-60 minute) bike rides with my finance, while lugging my son(an extra 30 lbs) on the little bike seat. We do it rate after he gets up, and before breakfast. At the end of each ride my legs were rubber, my butt on fire, sweaty and happy. It feels so good to push my body again. I didn't realize just how much I missed biking. I love flying down a hill, with the wind in my helmet, squeling with joy. My son loves it too. Heck, even pushing myself up a hill in the lowest gear is rewarding. All this work has paid off, my man said my legs feel more tight so I'm building my muscle again.

I don't want to approach the diet thing, that has been bad. But one thing at a time.

Oh yeah, and I'm done school. I now have my Master's degree in Education, no more late night homework crames.
I'me very happy to have finished. Now I can do all the other things I never had time for, and maybe get a life.

I also have another softball game tonight, I'me very excited. Then we are going out for a nice dinner with the baby, I hope to actually enjoy the food and not have to wolf it down. It's a celebration of accomplishment. My next goal is to focus on getting healthy and finding a new job in the teaching field.

I hope you all have had a great and rewarding week.

Comments(0)

Wow, has it been this long

Tuesday, December 5, 2006 23:09:16

I have a very good reason why it's been so long since my last post; mostly it involves moving and writing a grant proposal. We still have a few car loads left, and a lot of cleaning to do, as well as unpacking all the boxes.
Only two weeks left of my master’s degree and I'll be done with that too.
So I moved for 8 hours on Friday, and let me tell you, that was hard grueling work, and should count as a whole weeks worth of exercise. My body still hurts from it.

We got our bikes, including the baby seat. It's attached to my bike so will give mean even better workout. We went for a little ride on Sunday for Fathers day. After only 4 miles, my legs were Jelly. I miss that feeling. Once we are done with the old place and unpacked, I plan on trying to go everyday. I love biking, and so does my son. I'm excited.
It also helps that my son can run even faster, that just means I need to run to keep up with him.

Again, sorry for not posting, but hopefully now I can get back on track, cause lord knows my diet was out the window.

Comments(0)

Mommy Mule

Wednesday, December 6, 2006 00:02:17

So one way I'm trying to get in shape is my carrying my 25lb baby, in an 8 lb backback. We walked about three miles today, at a fast pace. In the middle we stopped at the park and ran around and played. I think that was a good work out. It counts.

I'm very excited cause we are moving in two weeks to a new apartment, which has direct access to a state park and to biking trails. We will be getting bikes, and the little seat on the back for the baby. I LOVE BIKING!! I perfer it over walking any day. We can do it cause we will have a bottom floor apartment, as well as a storage unit. I so can't wait, I'll probably bike everyday. I might also be joining a gym so that I can start using free weights. I lifted weights for many years, in high school and then in college, it was great, I loved being so strong and having nicely scuplted arms and back, I would wear speghitti strapped tank tops all summer. I want to do that again, so maybe by next summer I will be able to.

The doc has told me that I need to rest more and relax, that my stress is what is causing me to be so sick. Sadly I can't relax, I have to finish my grant proposal and plan our move. Maybe next month I can relax. We'll see. Maybe I can find a yoga class close by, I really miss doing that too.

Anyway, I love all you beautiful women, sorry I have not been posting, I'm just so overwhelmed with a new project at work, and then all the rest. I know you all are doing a great job. Keep up the good work.

Comments(2)

New Hair

Monday, December 4, 2006 22:09:15

Well, the one highlight I had this week was the awesome new haircut and color I got from Halo Spa. I cut off over 10 inches, which I donated to locks of Love, and had light blonde and copper highlights put in. This was the first time I have paid more than $15 for a haircut, and the first time ever to get highlights. It was awesome, and as the pictures show to the right, looks so cute. We also found that I have curl to my hair now, most likely due to pregancy hormons and such. I love the cut and the color, it feels so creat and I feel more condifident, at least from the neck up. As for my diet and excercise, they didn't exist this weekend. I hope to get back on track this week, although it today is any indication, it's going to be a very tough week. I will do my best though. I hope everyone had a great memorial day weekend, and that everyone is doing well. Comments(7)

We all fall down

Monday, December 4, 2006 22:05:13

I so wish I could have a postive post after the last horrible one, but at this time it's not in the cards. After that hike, I just lost my focus for the last few days, I havn't done my food log or any activities. Then yesterday I fell twice, the second time seriously hurting my ankle. I really need to start doing Yoga again, when I do it I have much better balance and don't fall as often.
I'm just realy bummed, I'm hoping that tomorrow I can get some more spunk into my life. I'm getting my hair cut and highlighted professionally, the first ever for me. I'm getting at least 10 inches off for locks of love. It will be pretty dramatic and I'm hoping will make me feel better, or at least more confident. We shall see, wish me luck, and I hope to get out of this rut soon. Comments(3)

Hell, pure and total Hell

Monday, December 4, 2006 22:05:13

It was horrible. The Mountain Mommas hike was a disaster, and one that will take me a while to recover. Frist I was at least 40lbs heavier than any of the other women there. I felt huge in comparison to all these lean mothers. Second, my child was by far the largest, meaning that not only would I be carrying all my own extra weight, but his weight as well, that's an extra 30lbs.
I wasn't sure if the hike would be on due to the weather concerns, but the leader said that we would go ahead and wip it out, to just bag the hike. I should have stopped rate there and said no, but I sucked it up and thought what the hell.
Rate of the bat the pace was very fast, faster then I'm capable of. I had to run up the trail to keep up, and I'm not a runner, or in that goood of shape. I quickly lagged behind. I was moving as fast as I could and still going so slow, breathing hard, sweating with my face turning bright red. I look up and all the other women look like they are just out for a stroll. Talking, not breathing hard, not sweating. I was so embarressed at my lack of physical ability. Then these two girls had to stop and they asked if I was ok, I said "NO, I'M FAT" It was harsh, and I later apoligized for it, but come on, I can't run up a mountain. I managed to stay in front of these women but it took evry once of focus and will power not to break down crying.
Everytime they all stopped for a break, by the time I reached them they would continue on, so I did not get a break until the halfway mark at 2 miles.
We decided to go back the way we came, and hope not to get rained on, sadly the storm wich we out walked was back the way we came. There was a lot of thunder, lighteing and dark clouds. I was concerned for some of the other women, there was one with an 11 week old baby. To get caught in the storm was a disaster.
And that is just what happened. We started walking back, some ran and it started to rain. The rain got harder and harder and then became mixed with snow. We came of a gully and were hit with the wind. Kids started screaming. Some women ran, I went as fast as I could go. I started to get a stich in my side, I was soaked, and soar. Then my son started to scream, he was cold and wet. The trail turned to mud and I started to slide all around. I thought this was so riduclous, this was wrong, we should not have been out here, all for out stupid fitness we put our lives and our children's lives in danger. Never again.
When my son started to scream, my adrelaine kicked in and I ran the last 1/2 mile to the car. No mind you I was so fatigues and I don't run, but hell if I can stand my son crying. By the time I go to the end I could barely get up the stairs to my car. My legs were like lead weights, I almost collapsed. But I had to get my son out of the weather.
We made it, we jumped in the car, warmed up, my son was ok, I was tired, and my face was about as red as could be. I pretty much had just power walked and ran a 4.1 mile hike in an hour and 15 minutes, this same hike took me three hours earlier in the week.
I'm amazed that I did it, but I never want to have to do that again. Fearing for my son was not what I had signed up for. I'm also not happy with the leadership, she should have stopped the hike or canceled it. I'm also canceling my hike for next week, I'm just not ready if this is the pace they keep on the hikes. Maybe next month, but it will take me a bit to get over this horrible dissapointment.

More bad news on the way, but this is enough for now.

Comments(1)

Rain, Rain, Go Away

Monday, December 4, 2006 22:02:17

So I'm a little bummed, it is supposed to rain tomorrow, and I have the hike with Mountain Mammas. I so want to do it, if it's good weahter I will be there. But I will not spend three plus hours out in the rain with my son on my back. That would be just miserable.

So I'm using the food log, and been recording everything I eat, or at least as close as I can get it, for over two weeks. It has led me to a question, how many KCAL's should I be at? Is under 2000 good? or should I shot for lower? I'm trying to be more active, but that also means I'm about twice as hungry. Of course I don't do as much as some of the women here do, but I am increasing what I do as I can. I hate being hungry. I have never dieted before and I'm finding it every bit as tough as everyone said it would be.

I just want to be thinner, back to my old weight when I was in college and could bike for 20 miles, and hike 2 or 3 14neers in one weekend. I want to hike for 8 straight hours, and do it again the next day. I want to play basketball, and kick the boys butt again. I want to be able to climb a 5.6 rated climb. I use to be able to do all these things, and eat whatever I wanted. Then I had a breakdown, gained 80 lbs and lost all my pyhsical strenth and stamina. It's been almost four years and I'm tired of it. I can't keep going like this. I hike, but it's so pathetic. I want more! I just wish I could eat more and still lose weight.

Ok, enough complaining and rambling. I'm sorry for all the "I wants" This is just so hard for me, when I keep looking back at where I was, it seems like such a long journey to get back there.

I hope you all are having a great start to your week.

Comments(1)

Carrying a load

Monday, December 4, 2006 22:00:15

I have my first hike with Mountain Mammas on Thursday, where I will need to carry my son the entire way. Well, to make sure I can do it, I went with my finace to try it out. They listed it as moderate, whatever. With 35-40 lbs on your back, it's hard as hell. It's listed as a 4.1 mile hike, but it seemed so much longer with all the ups and downs. But after 3 hours I had done it, all while carrying my baby on my back. I was very proud of myself, an tired as heck. It was beautiful and so worth it. I can't wait to do it again with a group of other Mommies carrying their children.

I realize though, that my goal of hiking a 14,000 foot peak by the end of this summer might be a little steep. I don't want to set myself up for failure, or injury(past problem) so I think my new goal will be something like 10 mile walk/hike. I'll work on it more, or maybe just a difficult trail. I want to try for at least 4 hours of continous excerise. We shall see. I do know that I want to get out to hike at least twice a week, and so far I do, but I also need to start walking on non-hiking days. I got the Nike attatchment to my ipod and will set it up to help motivate me to walk.

Anyways, so a good day, hope you all have had a great weekend as well.

Comments(2)