Hey ladies!! Glad to see some of you are still out there reading!! Makes me feel better :) I miss you gals...But I tell you that all the time, never stop believing me tho!
Well, my session with the personal trainer went GREAT!! She was so nice and attentive and really opened my eyes to some things as far as exercise goes. I learned to slooooowww down when I'm doing repetitions of any kind. I usually speed through them to get through them but I learned that's not the correct way, oops!! I also learned about resistance training. If you haven't tried it, DO IT!! It will change your mind about exercising I promise. I always thought that you had to do cardio to lose weight and get your body in shape...Well after an hour session of resistance training and talking to the personal trainer, I have a new outlook. I did an hour of resistance training, only doing cardio to get warmed up and to raise my heart rate...By the end of the session I was sweating and breathing hard!! It has made me a believer. I had my 2nd session with her yesterday and we did more resistance training. I only did 7 minutes of cardio and the rest was resistance training and lets just say I was again sweating like crazy so I know my body was getting a work out.
Yesterday I was a mad woman in the gym..After the hour session with the personal training, I was feeling adventageous and decided to do the spinning class (which is an hour) OMG!!!! Bye the time it was over my legs were wobbly, and today my whole body is SORE!!!! It's a good sore but dayum! I had to have burned a good 1000 calories yesterday. Today I think I'm going to take it easy and just do about 35-40 minutes on the elliptical and some abs.
My living arrangement with my uncle isn't so bad...I mean I still don't have privacy and I still don't have internet but it could be worse...alot worse so I'm thankful and I'll probably just end up sticking it out through the summer...I mean my internship allows me to do a lot of traveling so it's no TOO bad! Like next week, I'll be out of town for 4 days so I'll have the nice privacy of a hotel, on my jobs expense! Plus they're paying for meals and mileage...See why I love my job?! Lol. And the days where I need a break from the fam I can stay with one of my sorority sisters so I'll be just fine.
So, my ex is still trying to get back with me...He keeps going on and on about him changing...and the months we've been apart he's really realized what we had and wants to make it better than it ever has....He's taken me out to dinner and a jazz club, he's visited me at work...He's doing all the things I would have normally fell for but this time I just don't know...I still love him and he's still sexy (especially in that cop uniform) but how do I know if he's really changed? How do I know if he's serious? I don't think I'm ready to take that risk...Other than his last mess up we had a great relationship, I can honestly say and we'd be perfect together if I knew that he really has changed...But my heart isn't ready to take that chance again...*sigh*
Ok....I'm off to get my nails and eyebrows done, then to the gym..You guys have a great evening!
P.S.- Please pray for my grandmother. She was admitted into the hospital, she is having some problems and we've been playing the waiting game all day to get word of what is actually up with her. I love that woman so very much it's killing me that she's there and I'm not. So please pray for her.
Hello ladies...Well, those that are still around reading.
Just thought I'd give a quick update cause I've been MIA.
Here's the quick run down.
I've moved to the city for the summer to do my internship.
I absolutely LOVE my internship!!! I couldn't ask for a better job. Nevermind the pay is awesome!
I absolutely HATE my living arrangement. I'm staying with an uncle, that has no spare bedroom so I'm camping out on his living room floor. I have no privacy, no peace of mind, it's TERRIBLE!!! But IDK what else to do at this point.
I've joined Bally's for the summer. Got an awesome deal, so I will be working out this summer.
With that membership I got 2 free personal training sessions, my first one is tonight, YIKES!!! I think I can handle it though.
They also have spinning class at Bally's!!! So I'll be doing that 2-3 times a week.
I'm very excited to have a gym membership, I was most scared about not being able to work out.
My eating was TERRIBLE the past couple of weeks but I'm brining it back slowly but surely. My appetite has been nuts, I wish it wasn't so crazy all the time.
Im comfortably in a size 12 now!! I can shop in the juniors department of most stores now :) Onward and downward I go!!
I start a summer class next week, that's going to be nuts with my crazy schedule but I'll manage.
Made it to the gym yesterday. Did 45 minutes of cardio. 25 minutes on the treadmill. Only taking 2-2minute breaks. I ran 1.5 miles and burned 250 calories. Then I did 10 minutes on the bike and 10 minutes on the X-Bike. I was sweating so bad, it was crazy. I'm usually tired by the end but I was just going and going. I love that type of work out. Then after that I got in 100 abs [which I am now sore from]
Eating was no bueno. Gave into hunger and got a chicken nugget meal from McDonalds. I only planned to get a ice cream cone but my hunger wouldn't subside any longer. I have to start eating regularly and eating ON PLAN!
I weighed in at the gym...for the first time in about a month and a half..I'm happy to see the scale was the same as last time. I'm still at 193 and holding. I'm sooo happy to see I've maintained!! I want to be out of the 190's by the end of the month. Which gives me 1.5 weeks to lose 3lbs. I can do it, I've done it before!!!
Realization:
I've never been this close to my goal. I've never lost this much weight and kept it off this long. I started this journey on January 8th and since then I've lost 23lbs, a whole dress size, I can fit in regular size shoe and not wide. My self confidence has rose and the changes I've been making is evident inside and out. It all feels so good but it is also a push for me to continue. I know if I can make it this far, I can only go further.
I've said this before, but I am an all or nothing type of person...and that's with everything in my life I've realized. Weight loss, school work, my job, everything. I have realized that nothing has to be all or nothing. It's like once I start working out on plan, I have to eat on plan. That's why I felt so guilty about the McDonald's yesterday. So today I've planned against that. I have my chicken breast out to be grilled when I get back from the gym.
Main realization: With dedication I can do this!! Bumps along the road and gains are expected, so just deal with them, learn from them and continue on the journey.
I wish I had the energy I had yesterday, today. Yesterday I woke up and went to the gym for an hour and half. Then I came home and deep cleaned my apartment. I'm talking dusting, cleaning out drawers, vaccuuming, arranging my closet. Throwing out old papers and reorganzing. Then I did the same to the bathroom. Then ran to Wal-Mart and picked up some stuff. After that I cleaned out my car, now I just need to wash the outside.
Today I just need to finish packing up my things to move to Houston for the summer. Then I need to run some errands, pay some bills and head out. I want to go because I know I'll have fun but I hate living with other people *sigh* I guess I have to deal with it, huh?! Blah!
Ok, I'm gonna head to the gym before I lose motivation.
So I'm on day 2 of "getting my ass in gear" plan. So far everything is wonderful. EXCEPT this exercise thing. You all know how I love to exercise, and when I do, I work out HARD!! I just can't go do a measily 30 minute workout in the gym. I can't go sit on the bike for 30 minutes and say "ow, I worked out" No, I need some hard core cardio to feel like I've done something. BUT the problem with that is....MY HAIR!! I know that sounds pathetic but it's really not. Since I got my new hair cut and consultation I've been trying to take good care of my hair. She told me the reason I had so much breakage is because I've been wearing the ponytail to much. So I'm trying to stay away from the pony...Another thing is, I sweat VERY HARD when I work out. Mostly in my head...See how that could be a problem?! Yeaaa, my hair is going to look like a wet mop by the time I finish working out. But I'm black (if you didn't notice,lol!) and our hair is CRAZY! I mean that's fine if it iwas just right before I needed to wash it, but EVERYDAY?! That could start to be a problem. What is a girl to do?? Really, IDK what to do about that. I don't want to sacrfice my hair for a workout.....I know I sound really whinny but I can't help it, LOL!!!
I know after I post this b##&$fest of a post I'm gonna still put on those work out clothes and go to the gym,lol. But I just need someone to invent something to save my hair and allow me to get in a good workout.
I've decided to cut red meat and fast food out of my diet. I already don't eat fried food or sodas. I'm going to try veggie burgers..I'm nervous about that. Is there any good brand? I'm also going back to menu planning and weight watchers 5 fruits and veggies a day plan. I know I'll get a handle on this!
I start my internship in a week. I'm nervous. For one I have to move to Houston for the summer and live with my uncle and aunt. They're so nice for letting me stay but damn I'm going to miss having my own apartment and going and coming when I want. I know I could if I want to with them but it's just respectful not to, ya know?! I don't wanna share my space, that's selfish huh?! Oh well, I'll get over it. I have no other choice, gas costs ENTIRELY too much to even consider the commute. Wish my luck guys!
Since school has been out I've been living my life like it's golden,lol. I've had a blast hanging out with the girls and sorority sisters. I've been trying new things and new places and I love it!! I met [another] new guy and he's so cool. I gave him my number...I wonder if he'll call?! It's always like the ones I like the most play hard to get. The ones that are around are kind of bugging me *sigh*
Ok, I've rambled enough, I'm off to the gym...I'll be back with an edit of how it went.
Hello all! Or all that still read.. I am a bad EP'er for the last few months, I'm so sorry because I love and miss you all! You all have been so instrumental in my weightloss and healthy way of life, you have given so much inspiration and support to me I could never leave here. I miss hearing from you girls and just catching up. Since I am OFFICIALLY done with school this semester I can focus much more of my time of weight loss, eating healthy, which also means more time HERE! :)
This past semester has been so crazy I don't even know how I survived, but I did!! I had many great accomplishments and have grown so very much. I have matured, I've gained a whole new aspect of life. I've gained tons of friends and sisters and outlooks on life. I have gained a new prospective on my body and my health. I've gained self confidence and happiness I never knew I could. I can only pray for even more growth this summer and the next semester to follow.
A great thought I keep having is: This time next year I will be GRADUATING college!!! Lord willing, of course. That's great and amazing but scary...I know I'll do fine in the "real world" but it's still crazy to think I'll be there forever in a year,lol.
I'm praying to be able to take a class or two in summer school this summer. I'll have to call and check on that Monday. Pray for me please!
Today I went shopping...I've been itching to go. And I can say I am comfortably in a large size shirts in most shirts. EVEN button up shirts. That's a HUGE thing to me. I'm also comfortably in a size 12 jeans. So all the while I think I'm gaining weight, I'm not. That's reassuring but that doesn't discount the fact I need to be exercising and getting in all my water and fruits and veggies. Last week was bad because I was PMS'ing and didn't even know it. My period wasn't due this week but it came :( Ugh. Don't you hate when that happens?! Well, it should be gone soon!
Yesterday I got my hair done. It was SO overdue! I got it trimmed, added some layers and bangs. It's super cute. I'll put a picture up soon :)
So the ex is calling and texting and persuing me SO hard!! He's saying how he's realized all his mistakes, how he's matured and how he realizes how great I was and he just wants to make it right. He'll do anything to prove to me how he's changed. He graduated the police academy so now he works for the county. He said he's getting his life together and I'm the missing piece. Just going on and on about how he wants to be with me, how he misses and loves me. It's flattering and my love for him runs so deep. We were a good match, he just couldn't prioritize. And now that I'm dating, I see that all guys are like that! Well most of the ones I end up talking to. I know I'd seem dumb to give him another chance and it probably isnt' smart and all my friends and family wouldn't approve, but I can't lie and say the thought doesn't cross my mind :X *sigh*
This weekend is going to be busy, I have 5 sorority sisters graduating and they are all having parties afteward. Then a friend of mine is having a bday at a club so I will be partying kind or hard this weekend. Monday my eating and exercising plan goes in to work. I will commit to it and committ to blogging so I can be accountable. Have a good weekend all!
Since I crossed [into my sorority] I haven't been on track eating or exercising. Yes, I been to the gyms a few times when I had time. But as far as eating...I've been eating what I want, for the most part. I don't binge or eat uncontrollably. It's just when I'm hungry I eat what I have a taste for, when I do eat. Most of the time I'm getting in 1 or 2 meals in a day...No snacks. I'm drinking water and still haven't drank soda so that's a plus right?! I haven't been to WW's so I know I'm back in the 200's, I can feel it. I'm starting to feel gross again. But I think that is more of a body image issue I have..I've always had it. It stems from low self esteem and being overly critical about myself. I should have abs of steel because I always walk with my stomach sucked in. I'm just tired...I'm tired of worrying about my weight. I'm tired of worrying about every little thing I put in my mouth. *sigh* This is is no pity party, just my honest feelings right now. I've lost 23lbs before, I know I can do it, I know what it takes to do but damnit I need consistency. my sorority (which I love and wouldn't trade for the world) broke that consistency and it's hard as hell for me to get it back. I will be on summer break starting in a week. I did great with my weightloss last summer, I know I can do it again. I just have to make my plan, be motivated, and DO IT! Please pray for me because I'm tired of this up and down.
lastly, I'm going to admit this here because I said I'm going to be honest...I turned in and filled a perscription for Adipex...A weightloss drug the doctor prescribed to me 3 months ago. I think I wrote about it in here. i don't know why I did because I know if I'm not eating right or exercising it's not going to work and when I stop taking it, i'll gain it back. I just feel like I need a boost. I feel like it can help me start this. I'm such a comfort needy person, it's awful. I feel shitty about it but until my life slows down, IDK what to do?! *sigh*
On the other aspects of my life, I'm still busy as ever. The last 3 nights I've been up til atleast 4am. I had a 10 page paper due yesterday and another one due on Tuesday. I also have 2 finals Monday and 2 more finals on Tuesday, the last one on Wednesday. This is no excuse but time really just hasn't been on my side. My sorority has been having programs and scholarship pageants I had to work and prepare for. My life is absolutely bananas right now! I need to deep clean my house. I'm talking sweep and mopping the living room and kitchen. Dust ceiling fans, clean behind the couches, clean the fridge, deep clean and throw out all access crap in my room. Organize my bathroom and find a filing system for all my paperwork. Somebody save me from myself, please! lol.
Ok, I'm going to start on my 10pg paper, yall have a great weekend!
That today I have on a size large t shirt from American Eagle and a size 12 pants!!!!!!!!! Granted they are stretch but Wooohoo!! none the less :)
Onwards and downwards is the way for me :)
Eating is getting back on track. Making sure I have atleast 3 veggies a day. Still drinking water. Just gotta cut out unplanned fast food trips because of my busy schedule. It will all fall back into place this summer, I know it.
Exercise is almost none existant due to my busy schedules. It's not an excuse, just a reality.
Example:
My schedule today:
10a to 1pm- Back to back classes
1p to 4pm- Working on assignments due by midnight
5p to 5:45- community service meeting
5:45 to 7p- sorority meeting
7p to 9p- scholarship pageant practice
9p to 10:30p- another committee meeting
Soooo please tell me where I'd fit in a good workout, dinner OR even sanity with that schedule.
My life is bananas right now!! Finals are in 2 weeks so I won't be any less busy until then. Pray for me!!
So I've been off and on about this weight loss thing for some time, having all kind of excuses, knowing good and damn well my weight is going to inch back on...and it is. I stepped on the scale today (Granted it was the gym scale and not the WW scale) but it says I'm OUT OF ONDERLAND!!!! How the hell did that happen?! Yes, I've have some fast food and a couple of ice cream cones but dayum!! But that really doesn't suprise me cause in the back of my head, I knew it! But that scale is off, the WW scale is usually 3-4lbs below that. That would put me around 197, which is still TOO close for comfort!
Today started my back to business and I'm proud to say I did well. Minus eating a few cookies my roomate baked. I had wheat spaghetti with turkey meat for lunch and I had baked tillapia and steamed veggies for dinner. I had all my water AND I made it to the gym. I ran a mile on the indoor track, then I did weights (BE PROUD ALICIA!!) I did arms and gluts. Then I finished off with some abs. So I had an ok workout. I could have did more cardio, which I wanted to but some of my sorority sisters were with me and they are not used to my hardcore workouts and they were whinning the whole time, so I just said forget it. But I still got the most of out it, I just now know FOR SURE that I am a loner when it comes to exercising. I rather put my iPOD in and just do my workout alone. I'm very driven and motivated in the gym, people that do not have my intesity just piss me off. So, lesson learned, no more working out with sorority sisters, although I love them dearly.
Tomorrow morning I am taking out chicken breasts to grill for dinner. I have to go to mandatory training at work tomorrow so I will not have a lot of time for lunch, I'll probably just eat a smart one when I get there. I need to go buy some more fruits for the week.
And I have to be realistic, the gym 3 times a week doesn't do much for me, so 5 days a week it is. Although I have tons of papers and projects for school due, i HAVE to do this. I can not let this weight creep back on me. Excuses are tools that build monuments of nothing...So from now accountability will be my middle name. I have my mirror in my bathroom full of quotes and inspiration. I did it before, I can keep goin!
Tomorrow is hard cardio day in the gym, 45 minutes of it. 30 minutes of interval training on the treadmill and 15 minutes on the bike. I'll do about 200 abs and call it day.
I also think I need to stay at the WW meetings. I need that weight in weekly and encouragement from meetings. I didn't go today but I will start back next week. *sigh* I have to do this, I'm so close!!!
This weekend I'm going home to visit the fam and I have some business I have to attend to. My mom STILL has my dog and I'm trying to decide if I want to bring him back or let him stay with her. I have to move for the summer for my internship THEN I'm going out of town on vacation the 3rd week in May, so there's no need to bring him back if I'm leaving...IDK what to do?! *sigh*
Hope all you ladies are ending your week on a fabulous note. I'm just happy I'm done with all that crazy school work. But alas, no rest for the weary, I have to start studying for my poli sci test that's on Monday, then I have to start preparing for my 2 research papers that are due- within the next two weeks. Both of which have be 7-10 pages. Blah!!! Summer please hurry!
I'm proud to say I just got back from the gym, so day 2 of 3 is complete. I did 20 minutes of interval training on the treadmill, then I did 10 minutes on the bike and 10 mikes on the stairmaster. Then I did my ab workout. It was a good workout. I'm going to wake up and work out or go running in the morning and that will give me my 3 days work out for the week. I'm feeling adventageous, so I may go Sunday too. Depends on how hard I party tomorrow night,lol. So far I've eaten on plan as well. For breakfast I had a speacial k bar and banana, I had grilled chicken wheat noodled pasta and a salad for lunch and dinner will be grilled fish and steamed veggies. 40 more oz of water and that will be checked off too. I really feel like I'm making good strides at getting back on track, yay me! lol.
Ok, I just wanted to update and stay accountable. I'm gonna go wash my car now, have a great weekend ladies!
For accountablity purposes, I'm going to blog about my eating and exercising thus far.
I have exercised 1 out of the 3 planned days. Granted the day I did exercise I ran for 2.5 miles in 30 minutes, then I did ab work. So a good workout for me. I will get day 2 in tomorrow and 3 in on Friday hopefully.
My eatings hasn't been totally on plan but it has been BETTER than the past few weeks. Today I got in 3 of the 5 fruits and veggies. I had steamed broccoli for a snack, a banana with breakfast and an orange for another snack. I did have pizza and breadsticks for lunch today :( Yea, I don't even wanna know how many points that was! Ugh, I have GOT to go back to making smart decisions, even when I am around others who are eating poorly. I also got in 60oz of water, and I will have another 8 when I get home so I will have met my water goal for today.
I'm getting back on track and making healthier decisions, I just need to resist temptation and PLAN my meals realistically!
Tomorrow's meal plan is:
B: Cereal with 2% milk and banana or Special K bar & banana(if I wake up late) [9am]
S: Carrots and ranch dip [11am]
L: wrap & steamed veggies [2pm]
S: apple slices & 100 cal snack [4pm]
D: fish fillet and steamed broccoli and cheese [7pm]
Only 2 more days left of the week, THANK GOD!!!
Quote of the day:
“Learn the wisdom of compromise, for it is better to bend a little than to break”- Jane Wells
