Well, I've been eating pretty well. Probably not eating as much as I should but often enough so I'm not really worried.
I haven't ate out since my vow Saturday...If I make it til this Saturday I will have lived up to my week of no eating out! Quite an accomplishment for someone who at one point was eating out EVERY day! Yea, I was trippin.
Today I've had: B- fiber 1 bar, banana & V8 S-applesuace & 100 cal snack L-TBA S-TBA D-TBA
So I've vowed to get.my.ass.in.gear and there's no turning back now.
Yesterday our school sent out a fitness newsletter and I think it was like a wake up call for me...We are having a 5k next Saturday...Which is 8 days away, I want to do it, badly BUT I know I'm not ready. I haven't ran in weeks and to freshly run a 5k, I might hurt myself...I've never ran 3 miles consecutively, a week to get ready isn't enough time, is it??? I need suggestions on that one. AND it's only $5 to enter.
ALSO: starting the 27th our gym is having a bootcamp. It's a 4 week bootcamp that meets every Monday Wednesday and Friday at *gasp* 6:30a.m. It's $50 but it's with professional trainers and it's described as a "rigourous work out to get you back feeling and looking better." Exactly what I need! Not bad for $50 bucks huh?! And if I put my money into I know I'll stick to it. I usually work and stay in Houston Fridays-Mondays but I need to start making some sacrifices if I'm gonna get healthy. I've come to far to give up. I think I'm going to do it! Now how the HELL am I gonna get up that early is beyond me! *le sigh* I'll keep you guys posted.
So a lot of opportunities to G.M.A.I.G have arose. I have NO more excuses.
I have a male friend/interestee that I usually hang out with when I'm Houston. He's not healthy AT ALL. We are always going out to eat, eating desserts and what not. I have to get him to either A. eat healthier or B. cook when I'm there. Both sound unappeasing. Blah.
Random tidbit: I really want to lose weight so I can get a pair or True Religion jeans, am I vain?! :(
Another random tidbit: I have on the CUTEST yellow shorts today...$2.50 from Old Navy. They had a great sale a couple of weeks ago. Love it!
Ok, I'm outta here. leave your suggestions please!
Yea, Yea, Yea...I know I said I was back for good almost 2 months ago but life always seems to get in the way of your plans right?! I've fallen victim to one of my most motivational quotes "Failing to plan, is planning to fail."
For the last 2 months I've said "wow, I'm really feeling like I'm gaining weight" well I never stepped on a scale so I could hide from the true reality. THEN my pants started to fit tight...then tightER. Now to the point I can't breathe. Well, I gave all of my "fat clothes" away because I read that if you get rid of them you can't just slip them back on and ignore your weight gain. Well, now I'm stuck with size 12's that are TIGHT as hell!
Last week I finally decided enough was enough. Enough with the excuses, enough with letting other things get in the way of exercise and enough with falling victim to fastfood because of laziness and time commitments. So I went to the gym. I stepped on the scale and almost left in tears...I have gained 10lbs since mylowest weight inMarch. It is so disheartening. BUT I will not let that discourage me.
So last week I started "Operation G.M.A.I.G" which includes but not limited to:
Exercising 3 times a week. Even though I have class 2 days a week and I still work an hour ONE WAY from home. I just have to plan my time better and actually stick to it.
No sodas!!
60oz of water a day
5 fruits and veggies a day
very limited amounts of sugar/sweets
Meal planning!!
Wiggle room
I know that is typical weight loss ambitions but it has worked for me in the past and it will again. We all have road blocks, we all have times we fall victim to time restraints and busy work weeks, hell even laziness. I'm not going to deny that half of my problem is I've been lazy. But if you took 15 hours of college classes, commute an hour ONE way to work twice a week and work for a sorority (it's all work and little play right now) you'd be a little tired and want to be lazy. I'm a very driven person so I know i CAN do it, I just got to buckle down.
So October 6th started "Operation G.M.A.I.G" G.M.A.I.G= Get.My.Ass.In.Gear
And to get my ass in gear I've FINALLY bought new running shoes that actually fit and I'm able to run in without problems! And they were on clearance for $30 bucks! So much for needing high priced running shoes. I've also dug up my work out clothes and updated my iPOD. I've bought all healthy foods again and will not be eating out. I'm debating going back to weight watchers at the moment. IDK, we'll see. I'm feel like I'm making great strides.
And WOW have things changed around here!!! I like, I like! Makes me want to come around more often for sure! Lol.
Summer is officially over and school has officially started.
Wow, I've said officially like 5 times in the last 3 sentences,lol.
Anywho. I started my LAST year as an undergrad this week. College really has flown by. I can't believe I will not have any more "first days" of school anymore. Crazy as it may be it's cool. I'm so ready to graduate and move on with the next chapter of my life :) And I want to go into the next chapter of my life healthy and fit!
So, yes I'm back at it! I know this summer was a total let down in the weight loss department. I didn't lose ANY weight this summer, I actually gained. I'm so scared to get back on the scale but I have to. I have to stay true to myself and the only way to start doing that is see how much I weigh and knocking that number down.
I'm leaning on going back to Weight Watchers meetings because that was proven way that worked for me before. I strayed away and ended up gaining. I will probably be going back next Tuesday. Until then I will be working out in the gym. I'm so glad to be back at my gym!
Speaking of gyms, I'm really over Bally's. I went to cancel my membership because the summer was over and the girl I signed up with said that cancelling would be no problem and come to find out it is. I'm so sick of them calling me over it, ugh! They want me to apy a $50 cancellation fee and I was not told that up front, ugh! When I move to Houston next year I will NOT be going to Bally's. Has anyone else had problems with Bally's?
Eating: I went grocery shopping yesterday and bought all my fruits and veggies plus all my other healthy stuff. So I'm on track there. Lets just pray I stay away from fast food and baked goods. I've been craving baked goods so bad lately, it's awful. Cinnabon's and churro's have been my weakness :( I've got to work on my will power.
Recap:
My 21st birthday was AWESOME!! I celebrated my birthday for a whole week, LMAO! Vegas was a BLAST! It was so hot there, it was no less than 108 the whole time we were there. I definitely ate bad and drank too much alcohol but hey, you only turn 21 once! Everywhere we went were giving me free drinks because it was my birthday,lol. I'll share pix from Vegas soon, promise. Then I came back to Texas and had a birthday party at a nightclub with one of my sorority sisters and that was a blast too! So many people showed me love, it was great.
My internship was also one of the best experiences I've had. And I did so well they offered me a position upon graudation with the company!!!! The salary is AWESOME! My mom said I'm making what took her 10-15 years to make out of school. So I must be doing something right! :)
Ok, this is long enough.
But I want yall to know I'm SOOO happy to be back!!!
Hello ladies! I know yall are shocked to see me on your updated list. I am still alive...I've been so busy with my internship, and life in general I've strayed away from EP. I really miss you ladies and hope everyone is doing well in their weightloss journey.
How have I been? I have been GREAT!! Yes, this summer has been a challenge with ny living situation but I've made the best out of the bad sitution. It's worked out that I've only had to stay with my uncle 3 days a week at the max. Thank God for friends and sorors! My job has also helped a lot. We have been traveling a lot this summer so I've been staying in hotels and stuff. So it's all good.
I have also been spending a lot of time at church. I go almost every Wednesday and Sunday. It has really helped me. I have stopped complaining. Yes, I was a HUGE complainer. But no more. I am no longer negative. If something bad happens, I just calm down and let God work it out. And so far he has. I don't want to give a long testimonial but I looked at my financial aid status a few weeks ago and all the school offered me was loans and I was stressed because I didn't want to take out 10k in student loans....I didn't get upset, cry or stress I just said if that's how I have to get through senior year, I will...I checked the site again this week and I had a GRANT for 5k offered to me!!!! Free money I don't have to pay back, can we say HALLELUJAH?! If that isn't God, I don't know what is. He continues to minister to my spirit daily and I'm just so blessed.
9 more days until I turn the big 2-1!!!!! I'm pumped :) I will be spending my 21st birthday in Las Vegas with my mom, roomate and uncle. We're staying at the MGM Grand on the strip. I am sooo excited, I'm going to have the best 21st ever! I will take lots of pix for yall :)
My internship has proven to be one of the best experiences I've ever had. I have the best boss, the best co workers and work environment. I've been able to grow and develop and I found out that at the end of my internship I will be getting an offer to come aboard after graduation next summer! See how God continues to bless me? The salary is awesome too, so at the beginning of next year I will start looking for either a gated apartment or a condo. I want the condo so we shall see :)
I have also loved being here in the city! I am such a city girl at heart. I have met a TON of people and went to a TON of new places. I've tried so many new resturaunts and clubs and little hang out spots. I love it! I've also been dating. So no, the ex and I are NOT together. He's still pursuing but I'm just playing it cool. Maybe in the future but not now. Some of the guys I've dated have been great and I've had a blast but didn't work out. I was bummed but I'm moving on. I'm always meeting guys too, it's CRAZY! Talk about self esteem boost, lol. This guy was ON A DATE WITH ANOTHER GIRL last night at Barnes and Noble but gave the Starbucks guy his number on sticky note to give to me, lol!! Hilarious.
Oh, thanks for all the prayers for my grandmother. She was released from the hospital fairly quickly and is doing well! She's learning to live with her diabetes and control and for that I am so grateful! She just celebrated her 73rd birthday this month so that's a blessing.
Ok, I know this is long and I haven't even talked about WEIGHTLOSS... *sigh*
Living here in the city, not having a stable place to live has all added up to me eating TERRIBLY! I mean I've had McDonalds and way too many cookies to count. I know it's wrong because I feel guilty when I eat it. I've also been guilty of emotional eating. When I get frustrated I eat and that's no bueno. I have accepted that I have gained weight this summer...To scared to see how much but I know I have. My clothes are fitting tighter and I can just feel it. I haven't been to the gym in almost 2 weeks and again I feel horrible. But my life has been so hectic I don't even know if I'm coming or going most of the time. So when I come back from Vegas and return to my apartment, back to making my own healthy meals and working out 4-5 times a week. I think I will go back to WW meetings to help. I'm not ok with it but I'm dealing with it because I know how crazy my situation is out here. So just keep me in your thoughts.
OK, now that I've caught you up on the last month and half of my life I'm going to start my research paper that's due tomorrow.
I MISS YOU GIRLS! I'm going to try to write more often, promise!
Hey ladies!! Glad to see some of you are still out there reading!! Makes me feel better :) I miss you gals...But I tell you that all the time, never stop believing me tho!
Well, my session with the personal trainer went GREAT!! She was so nice and attentive and really opened my eyes to some things as far as exercise goes. I learned to slooooowww down when I'm doing repetitions of any kind. I usually speed through them to get through them but I learned that's not the correct way, oops!! I also learned about resistance training. If you haven't tried it, DO IT!! It will change your mind about exercising I promise. I always thought that you had to do cardio to lose weight and get your body in shape...Well after an hour session of resistance training and talking to the personal trainer, I have a new outlook. I did an hour of resistance training, only doing cardio to get warmed up and to raise my heart rate...By the end of the session I was sweating and breathing hard!! It has made me a believer. I had my 2nd session with her yesterday and we did more resistance training. I only did 7 minutes of cardio and the rest was resistance training and lets just say I was again sweating like crazy so I know my body was getting a work out.
Yesterday I was a mad woman in the gym..After the hour session with the personal training, I was feeling adventageous and decided to do the spinning class (which is an hour) OMG!!!! Bye the time it was over my legs were wobbly, and today my whole body is SORE!!!! It's a good sore but dayum! I had to have burned a good 1000 calories yesterday. Today I think I'm going to take it easy and just do about 35-40 minutes on the elliptical and some abs.
My living arrangement with my uncle isn't so bad...I mean I still don't have privacy and I still don't have internet but it could be worse...alot worse so I'm thankful and I'll probably just end up sticking it out through the summer...I mean my internship allows me to do a lot of traveling so it's no TOO bad! Like next week, I'll be out of town for 4 days so I'll have the nice privacy of a hotel, on my jobs expense! Plus they're paying for meals and mileage...See why I love my job?! Lol. And the days where I need a break from the fam I can stay with one of my sorority sisters so I'll be just fine.
So, my ex is still trying to get back with me...He keeps going on and on about him changing...and the months we've been apart he's really realized what we had and wants to make it better than it ever has....He's taken me out to dinner and a jazz club, he's visited me at work...He's doing all the things I would have normally fell for but this time I just don't know...I still love him and he's still sexy (especially in that cop uniform) but how do I know if he's really changed? How do I know if he's serious? I don't think I'm ready to take that risk...Other than his last mess up we had a great relationship, I can honestly say and we'd be perfect together if I knew that he really has changed...But my heart isn't ready to take that chance again...*sigh*
Ok....I'm off to get my nails and eyebrows done, then to the gym..You guys have a great evening!
P.S.- Please pray for my grandmother. She was admitted into the hospital, she is having some problems and we've been playing the waiting game all day to get word of what is actually up with her. I love that woman so very much it's killing me that she's there and I'm not. So please pray for her.
Hello ladies...Well, those that are still around reading.
Just thought I'd give a quick update cause I've been MIA.
Here's the quick run down.
I've moved to the city for the summer to do my internship.
I absolutely LOVE my internship!!! I couldn't ask for a better job. Nevermind the pay is awesome!
I absolutely HATE my living arrangement. I'm staying with an uncle, that has no spare bedroom so I'm camping out on his living room floor. I have no privacy, no peace of mind, it's TERRIBLE!!! But IDK what else to do at this point.
I've joined Bally's for the summer. Got an awesome deal, so I will be working out this summer.
With that membership I got 2 free personal training sessions, my first one is tonight, YIKES!!! I think I can handle it though.
They also have spinning class at Bally's!!! So I'll be doing that 2-3 times a week.
I'm very excited to have a gym membership, I was most scared about not being able to work out.
My eating was TERRIBLE the past couple of weeks but I'm brining it back slowly but surely. My appetite has been nuts, I wish it wasn't so crazy all the time.
Im comfortably in a size 12 now!! I can shop in the juniors department of most stores now :) Onward and downward I go!!
I start a summer class next week, that's going to be nuts with my crazy schedule but I'll manage.
Made it to the gym yesterday. Did 45 minutes of cardio. 25 minutes on the treadmill. Only taking 2-2minute breaks. I ran 1.5 miles and burned 250 calories. Then I did 10 minutes on the bike and 10 minutes on the X-Bike. I was sweating so bad, it was crazy. I'm usually tired by the end but I was just going and going. I love that type of work out. Then after that I got in 100 abs [which I am now sore from]
Eating was no bueno. Gave into hunger and got a chicken nugget meal from McDonalds. I only planned to get a ice cream cone but my hunger wouldn't subside any longer. I have to start eating regularly and eating ON PLAN!
I weighed in at the gym...for the first time in about a month and a half..I'm happy to see the scale was the same as last time. I'm still at 193 and holding. I'm sooo happy to see I've maintained!! I want to be out of the 190's by the end of the month. Which gives me 1.5 weeks to lose 3lbs. I can do it, I've done it before!!!
Realization:
I've never been this close to my goal. I've never lost this much weight and kept it off this long. I started this journey on January 8th and since then I've lost 23lbs, a whole dress size, I can fit in regular size shoe and not wide. My self confidence has rose and the changes I've been making is evident inside and out. It all feels so good but it is also a push for me to continue. I know if I can make it this far, I can only go further.
I've said this before, but I am an all or nothing type of person...and that's with everything in my life I've realized. Weight loss, school work, my job, everything. I have realized that nothing has to be all or nothing. It's like once I start working out on plan, I have to eat on plan. That's why I felt so guilty about the McDonald's yesterday. So today I've planned against that. I have my chicken breast out to be grilled when I get back from the gym.
Main realization: With dedication I can do this!! Bumps along the road and gains are expected, so just deal with them, learn from them and continue on the journey.
I wish I had the energy I had yesterday, today. Yesterday I woke up and went to the gym for an hour and half. Then I came home and deep cleaned my apartment. I'm talking dusting, cleaning out drawers, vaccuuming, arranging my closet. Throwing out old papers and reorganzing. Then I did the same to the bathroom. Then ran to Wal-Mart and picked up some stuff. After that I cleaned out my car, now I just need to wash the outside.
Today I just need to finish packing up my things to move to Houston for the summer. Then I need to run some errands, pay some bills and head out. I want to go because I know I'll have fun but I hate living with other people *sigh* I guess I have to deal with it, huh?! Blah!
Ok, I'm gonna head to the gym before I lose motivation.
So I'm on day 2 of "getting my ass in gear" plan. So far everything is wonderful. EXCEPT this exercise thing. You all know how I love to exercise, and when I do, I work out HARD!! I just can't go do a measily 30 minute workout in the gym. I can't go sit on the bike for 30 minutes and say "ow, I worked out" No, I need some hard core cardio to feel like I've done something. BUT the problem with that is....MY HAIR!! I know that sounds pathetic but it's really not. Since I got my new hair cut and consultation I've been trying to take good care of my hair. She told me the reason I had so much breakage is because I've been wearing the ponytail to much. So I'm trying to stay away from the pony...Another thing is, I sweat VERY HARD when I work out. Mostly in my head...See how that could be a problem?! Yeaaa, my hair is going to look like a wet mop by the time I finish working out. But I'm black (if you didn't notice,lol!) and our hair is CRAZY! I mean that's fine if it iwas just right before I needed to wash it, but EVERYDAY?! That could start to be a problem. What is a girl to do?? Really, IDK what to do about that. I don't want to sacrfice my hair for a workout.....I know I sound really whinny but I can't help it, LOL!!!
I know after I post this b##&$fest of a post I'm gonna still put on those work out clothes and go to the gym,lol. But I just need someone to invent something to save my hair and allow me to get in a good workout.
I've decided to cut red meat and fast food out of my diet. I already don't eat fried food or sodas. I'm going to try veggie burgers..I'm nervous about that. Is there any good brand? I'm also going back to menu planning and weight watchers 5 fruits and veggies a day plan. I know I'll get a handle on this!
I start my internship in a week. I'm nervous. For one I have to move to Houston for the summer and live with my uncle and aunt. They're so nice for letting me stay but damn I'm going to miss having my own apartment and going and coming when I want. I know I could if I want to with them but it's just respectful not to, ya know?! I don't wanna share my space, that's selfish huh?! Oh well, I'll get over it. I have no other choice, gas costs ENTIRELY too much to even consider the commute. Wish my luck guys!
Since school has been out I've been living my life like it's golden,lol. I've had a blast hanging out with the girls and sorority sisters. I've been trying new things and new places and I love it!! I met [another] new guy and he's so cool. I gave him my number...I wonder if he'll call?! It's always like the ones I like the most play hard to get. The ones that are around are kind of bugging me *sigh*
Ok, I've rambled enough, I'm off to the gym...I'll be back with an edit of how it went.
Hello all! Or all that still read.. I am a bad EP'er for the last few months, I'm so sorry because I love and miss you all! You all have been so instrumental in my weightloss and healthy way of life, you have given so much inspiration and support to me I could never leave here. I miss hearing from you girls and just catching up. Since I am OFFICIALLY done with school this semester I can focus much more of my time of weight loss, eating healthy, which also means more time HERE! :)
This past semester has been so crazy I don't even know how I survived, but I did!! I had many great accomplishments and have grown so very much. I have matured, I've gained a whole new aspect of life. I've gained tons of friends and sisters and outlooks on life. I have gained a new prospective on my body and my health. I've gained self confidence and happiness I never knew I could. I can only pray for even more growth this summer and the next semester to follow.
A great thought I keep having is: This time next year I will be GRADUATING college!!! Lord willing, of course. That's great and amazing but scary...I know I'll do fine in the "real world" but it's still crazy to think I'll be there forever in a year,lol.
I'm praying to be able to take a class or two in summer school this summer. I'll have to call and check on that Monday. Pray for me please!
Today I went shopping...I've been itching to go. And I can say I am comfortably in a large size shirts in most shirts. EVEN button up shirts. That's a HUGE thing to me. I'm also comfortably in a size 12 jeans. So all the while I think I'm gaining weight, I'm not. That's reassuring but that doesn't discount the fact I need to be exercising and getting in all my water and fruits and veggies. Last week was bad because I was PMS'ing and didn't even know it. My period wasn't due this week but it came :( Ugh. Don't you hate when that happens?! Well, it should be gone soon!
Yesterday I got my hair done. It was SO overdue! I got it trimmed, added some layers and bangs. It's super cute. I'll put a picture up soon :)
So the ex is calling and texting and persuing me SO hard!! He's saying how he's realized all his mistakes, how he's matured and how he realizes how great I was and he just wants to make it right. He'll do anything to prove to me how he's changed. He graduated the police academy so now he works for the county. He said he's getting his life together and I'm the missing piece. Just going on and on about how he wants to be with me, how he misses and loves me. It's flattering and my love for him runs so deep. We were a good match, he just couldn't prioritize. And now that I'm dating, I see that all guys are like that! Well most of the ones I end up talking to. I know I'd seem dumb to give him another chance and it probably isnt' smart and all my friends and family wouldn't approve, but I can't lie and say the thought doesn't cross my mind :X *sigh*
This weekend is going to be busy, I have 5 sorority sisters graduating and they are all having parties afteward. Then a friend of mine is having a bday at a club so I will be partying kind or hard this weekend. Monday my eating and exercising plan goes in to work. I will commit to it and committ to blogging so I can be accountable. Have a good weekend all!
Since I crossed [into my sorority] I haven't been on track eating or exercising. Yes, I been to the gyms a few times when I had time. But as far as eating...I've been eating what I want, for the most part. I don't binge or eat uncontrollably. It's just when I'm hungry I eat what I have a taste for, when I do eat. Most of the time I'm getting in 1 or 2 meals in a day...No snacks. I'm drinking water and still haven't drank soda so that's a plus right?! I haven't been to WW's so I know I'm back in the 200's, I can feel it. I'm starting to feel gross again. But I think that is more of a body image issue I have..I've always had it. It stems from low self esteem and being overly critical about myself. I should have abs of steel because I always walk with my stomach sucked in. I'm just tired...I'm tired of worrying about my weight. I'm tired of worrying about every little thing I put in my mouth. *sigh* This is is no pity party, just my honest feelings right now. I've lost 23lbs before, I know I can do it, I know what it takes to do but damnit I need consistency. my sorority (which I love and wouldn't trade for the world) broke that consistency and it's hard as hell for me to get it back. I will be on summer break starting in a week. I did great with my weightloss last summer, I know I can do it again. I just have to make my plan, be motivated, and DO IT! Please pray for me because I'm tired of this up and down.
lastly, I'm going to admit this here because I said I'm going to be honest...I turned in and filled a perscription for Adipex...A weightloss drug the doctor prescribed to me 3 months ago. I think I wrote about it in here. i don't know why I did because I know if I'm not eating right or exercising it's not going to work and when I stop taking it, i'll gain it back. I just feel like I need a boost. I feel like it can help me start this. I'm such a comfort needy person, it's awful. I feel shitty about it but until my life slows down, IDK what to do?! *sigh*
On the other aspects of my life, I'm still busy as ever. The last 3 nights I've been up til atleast 4am. I had a 10 page paper due yesterday and another one due on Tuesday. I also have 2 finals Monday and 2 more finals on Tuesday, the last one on Wednesday. This is no excuse but time really just hasn't been on my side. My sorority has been having programs and scholarship pageants I had to work and prepare for. My life is absolutely bananas right now! I need to deep clean my house. I'm talking sweep and mopping the living room and kitchen. Dust ceiling fans, clean behind the couches, clean the fridge, deep clean and throw out all access crap in my room. Organize my bathroom and find a filing system for all my paperwork. Somebody save me from myself, please! lol.
Ok, I'm going to start on my 10pg paper, yall have a great weekend!
And to get my ass in gear I've FINALLY bought new running shoes that actually fit and I'm able to run in without problems! And they were on clearance for $30 bucks! So much for needing high priced running shoes. I've also dug up my work out clothes and updated my iPOD. I've bought all healthy foods again and will not be eating out. I'm debating going back to weight watchers at the moment. IDK, we'll see. I'm feel like I'm making great strides.