Parting of the Clouds...
Last week I slacked. Badly. I have found it so hard to get back on track and
stay there. Most of this problem was frustration because my foot hurt, and
my leg hurt because I was walking funny on it, as to ease the pain in the
location of my surgery. I had absolutely no motivation to work out. Sure, I
could use the recumbent bike, but I have made my feelings about those clear.
My beloved arc trainer hurt so bad--not during the act, but for days and
days afterwards. Last week I didn't do a damn thing. I didn't eat well. I
didn't track. I didn't work out. I did spend a lot of time feeling sorry for
myself.
Then on Saturday something amazing happened. My foot felt better. Not
perfect, mind you, but better. I can walk normally, pushing off from my
toes. It is still pretty tingly, but that doesn't bug me unless I am putting
on or taking off socks, and the arch of my foot sometimes aches due to the
fact that I am still curling my toes (still working on that), but it doesn't
hurt. It doesn't hurt. It doesn't hurt. It doesn't hurt.
Hallelujah it doesn't hurt!
Yesterday morning I went to the gym and walked straight past those recumbent
bikes and climbed aboard my trusty Arc Trainer. Boy am I our of shape. Red
Face was back after a long absence, but I made it for 10 minutes and then
another 20 minutes after weights. I am sore today, My arms are T'd that I
actually made them work, and my calf's don't know what hit them---but it is
not the same mind numbing pain that I experienced the last time--just that
oh yeah, we used to do this 6 times a week ache that feels so good. And my
food still does not hurt. It is a little tight today, like the rest of my
muscles but does not hurt. It does not hurt.
While for the last several weeks I have been promising myself to get back on
the wagon, I am still trying to climb back on. The food is still not
perfect---although its much better than it was. I am not tracking. I am not
sure how to go about getting back and staying back.... but I am working on
it. There have been other issues; my current and all-consuming baby fever
for one, and the news that Chad is probably going to have to have knee
surgery, teamed with work strife on his part have weighed heavily on both of
us the last few weeks. I am feeling a bit out of control, and I hate that
feeling... I am hoping that taking control of what I can---what goes into my
body, and what I do to improve it, will help get some of these other issues
into perspective.
A quick note: For some reason, comments are taking a long time (several
days) to show up... so Im sorry for not responding to them until now. I will
check back here rather than wait for EP to notify me of comments from now
on!